A Letter to Stephenie Meyer – Love, LTT

Sassy Steph

Sassy Steph

Dear Stephenie Meyer,

Yesterday, while UC was working diligently, enriching people’s lives by conning them into buying overpriced hot tubs (fine-she wasn’t.. she was reading 750 updates in her google reader all related to Twilight- you caught her), and Moon was in her bed on the west coast dreaming of Edward, UC came across your latest website update. This line jumped out at her:

So that’s my “How I Spent My Summer.” I hope you guys had a really good time this summer, and found some great stuff of your own. I love this world full of stories and songs waiting to be discovered! And I also love you, the awesome Twilight (and maybe a few Hosts, too) fandom. I stalk your websites all the time—you guys are hilarious (I recently added LTT to my stalk list; thanks for the laugh lines, ladies). I’m looking forward to seeing some of you in November for a little movie release that I’m excited about. Too many months to go!

Um… you mean OUR LTT?! OUR LETTERS TO TWILIGHT?!

steph-hot

milfy Steph

After she stopped freaking out, read through the gazillion emails, twitter replies and texts she started receiving congratulating us on becoming “Goddesses'” (seriously, those words were used. And we’re not complaining- cuz we’ve thought of ourselves as  Goddesses for quite some time) she started texting Moon to wake her up from a dazzle induced coma to share the good news. At 630AM. Ahem. Moon has never jumped out of bed that quick and hit send on the phone. Poor UC had to hear her yell “SHUT UP” about 10 tens before we could properly discuss this turn of events.  After hanging up, Moon contemplated running a victory lap around her neighborhood shouting at the top of her lungs “WE HAVE ARRIVED,” but she got winded at the neighbors house and had to take a breather. So we reigned it in, cause we can’t be having a fangirl freak out too hard on a Monday morning. Especially on a day where we posted a comic about anal and a totally fake account of Moon being Rob’s fake fiance, in detail. Uh, WHOOPS! But such is life writing for LTT/LTR.

So of course what did we decide to do? What else?  We decided to pen a letter to you, of course, this is LETTERS to Twilight after all, welcoming you to our little world. We have the following things to say:

1. We hope you understand all the stuff we’ve written on here and we’re sorry. For everything we’ve ever said (except for all the stuff about Buttcrack Santa, cuz seriously? That shiz was messed up. Let us in on the secret, what was The Cougar Cathy drinking?) But seriously, we love this saga! Clearly.

2. We love you. But can we ask you one teeeeensy favor? Can you publish the rest of Midnight Sun, we’re kind of under a deadline for some New Years Resolutions we made… and there are people who want us to fail!

3. You need to pledge the LTT Sorority: Wanna Tapa Vampa! There’s nothing like running around a high school in a wool pea coat to show your true devotion. Yea, it’s summer in Phoenix, Moon knows all about that, but it’s gotta be easier than driving from NYC to Forks in a Volvo WHILE making homemade mushroom ravioli, right? We may have lost the “bake off” to the Sisterhood, but we’ll get em in the end!

4. Twilight Tattoos – We’ve got an appointment next week to get our matching tattoos inspired by Twilight and well, there’s always room for one more! Whattya say? Explaining to your husband why you have a Buttcrack Santa tribute tatt in your bicep or a Charlie Swan cop stache tatt on your finger is half the fun! Just tell him “That’s Normal!”

5. Can you introduce us to Rob? You know… cuz, he seems nice and all….

6. This doesn’t change a thing…. Sure, we may cringe a little more since we know you might read when we’re honest, in one of our Twilosophy sessions, about something you wrote, or when we complain about WHY in the world you didn’t hit a certain director over the head when she allowed the line “spider monkey” to infiltrate your beautiful story, but we’re not gonna stop saying it. We are who we are. We love the world you built in all it’s beauty and imperfections. And we’re gonna venture to guess that might be why you like reading us though.

Now that we have that out of the way, a belated Welcome to LTT!

By the way, how did you find us?

Welcome to our little corner of the Twi-world,
UnintendedChoice & Themoonisdown

Debunk Robsten with us at Letters to Rob
Wanna talk it out? Head over to the forum!

Since obviously the entire world needs to know SMeyer stalks US, we’ve decided to create a few new graphics that we’ll incorporate into our blog.  After the cut, take our poll & decide which one we should go with
(click to enlarge these)

jokeheader01
Her original quote… but that’s no fun now is it??

Check out our new awesomly fake dream headers for the blog…
jokeheader02
Rob

jokeheader03
Botox party
jokeheader04
Kellan

jokeheader05
Rewriting Twilight
jokeheader06
That’s Normal!
jokeheader07
Chagrin
jokeheader08
Team I don’t give a crapsten
jokeheader09
Buttcrack Santa

jokeheader10
KStew

Time to vote!!!!!!

etc

Our internet game is ridiculous: LTR, The Forum, Twitter, The Store
  • Janetrigs

    Recycling my very late comment from yesterday’s LTT, cause I got work shizz to do….

    <3 your faces!

    What the hell is Stephanie Meyer thinking?

    She obviously has a thing for dumpsters, Filet-o-Fish, Fake Lesbians, Oregano, Sat AM Dirt or Morning Delight, 2nd Hand Embarassment, Unicorns, Quad Break Downs, Monday Funnies, Twilosophy, Stripward, Crappy Pocket/Lil Edward, Fan Made Art & Videos, Chris Hanson, Stuff on My Cat, BFFs Ash & Rach, “This is How you Found Us”, Sunday Morning Worship, One Pic, Two takes, Single Gals Round Table, Storytime with UC and/or Moon., & Moon’s Pap skills!

    • themoonisdown

      stripward. defs stripward!

      • Oedipal Art

        Wouldn’t it just be hellonearth if Stripward was actually the snail.

  • http://twitter.com/MsYuppieScum DontQuestionMe

    Awesomeness! Congrats sistas! :)

  • mrssoup

    That is fantastic!

  • oopsilovetwi

    Oh my gosh. Brava to you guys. Moon having to take a breather at the neighbor’s house during her victory lap was hilarious. I just kept thinking about Super Bad. “Oh my god. The kid’s a freak. He’s the fastest kid alive!” Ah, I love Seth Rogan.

  • newtonandyorkiehavethebestlinesEVER

    hahaha this is so awesomel! i’m so happy for you!!!

    i can’t wait to go to the usa and get drunk with you! drunk’s cool.

    congratulation ladies. this is BIG.

    • themoonisdown

      whens this drinking happening?

  • Hermes

    Congrats Moon/UC – On the Meyers shout out.

    I think Ms. Meyers must have a sense of humor if she didnt shit a brick reading some of the things you all write about and we comment on…..
    (which can get quite naughty by the way).

    cheers, to you (raises a bloody mary ).

  • Lila

    Congrats!!!!

    and I have two choices!!! the CHAGRIN and the KELLAn header… cuz it will be a chagri to leave Kellan behind ooops *thatswhatshesaid*

  • http://libbyandthecity.blogspot.com Libby

    CONGRATS!!!!! maybe she can write something inspired on you girls!!! it would be an awesome book!

  • brittanyrenouf

    aww congrats girls!!! :D

  • Oedipal Art

    Congrats ladies!! I know I love ya. Now I need to figure out how to get my own picture as an avatar, so Rob can fall in love with ME and not this multi-pedal little red monster with the horn growing out of its head. (Unless that’s his thing…….)

  • Proselyte3

    I have to say it…tis cool.

    And it’s a truth universally acknowledged (heh) that S.M. would love this blog. Girl’s got a sense of humor! You’d have to, to absorb all this crazy.

    • themoonisdown

      now if we could only resurrect jane austen…

      • Katie S

        I thought SM already did?

  • Holly

    You know, I was just thinking…how cool would it be if Steph COMMENTED here?! Like, right here, replying under MY comment? *clears throat loudly*… That would be so freakin’ awesome! *holds breath*…

    • Holly

      Okay, first of all, I did NOT give myself that thumbs up. and second, I am so sad. I have been refreshing this page every 2 minutes – okay, okay, like twice in the past 5 hours – and Mrs. Meyer did not respond. I am weeping. There’s always tomorrow, Steph!

  • trixi

    can i vote more than once. some of those are just sooo funny!

  • Katie S

    Could you make a seperate “thumbs up” for SM? Like a “Steph Meyer approves!” button? Then she could HIT IT whenever she liked a comment and/or blog post! Normal!

  • leahcyr

    awesome! that is so cool that steph meyer reads the site, you two must be stoked.

    as for the banners, i like the original quote one, but since that wasnt a voting choice.. i like the idea of rob being sent over to visit you two, since you deserve some rob-love for creating this AWESOME blog that attracts STEPHENIE FREAKIN MEYER… good job girls, be proud

  • http://twi-nerds.com Megan

    May I just say that I LOVE you for begging for Midnight Sun? I was actually just talking to mi amiga yesterday about what I would love to write to Stephanie about, and Midnight Sun was top of the list! (shortly followed by the bill I’m sending her for the mountain of Twilight expenses – including an entire trip to Forks, I’ll have you know, Steph! …from Texas! – that have sucked my already sad bank account dry) I can’t believe you actually got to do what I could only dream of doing! Lol! So awesome…

  • http://www.lulaville.com Leigh Anne (or Lula!)

    I love the fame…

    and yes, we’re gonna live FOREVER. Duh.

    • http://letterstotwilight.wordpress.com unintendedchoice

      why the hell are you in pending?

      • BrookeLockart

        I think its cause she changed her name, sorta.

  • http://86rabbit.wordpress.com ’86 Rabbit

    Congrats again, UC and Moon!

    Hi Steph!

  • southernbelle

    Oh I wish I read this earlier today! I missed out.

    Anyway, congrats UC and Moon! You gals have arrived, whohoo!!! Pass the margaritas!

    Stephenie if you read this, you are awesome and thank you for the wonderful stories you’ve created! It gives me a chance to escape, to feel young(er) and to fall madly in love all over again *sigh*!

  • AboutARob

    CONGRATULATIONS LADIES!!

    i started adoring you a couple of months ago, and yesterday i was doing my daily twistalking, and i saw the news on bellasdiary. and i was like, dude, even stephenie reads them!! i couldn’t help smile laugh and be really happy 4 u!
    =)
    sincerely, from mexico

  • lapushbaby

    I’m way late, on West Coast on vacation, but I have to congratulate you, this freaking ROCKS. Smeyer with the LTT love…wow, just wow. It’s so awesome, and so normal!

    :-)

  • Aurélia

    Congrats ladies !

    Who wouldn’t laugh while reading your blog ?

    Like you said, i’m sure even Kristen would smile ;)

  • melbel

    wow
    so um iv been stalking you for a while now..
    i hide outside you window at night and heavly breath on the fone you still havnt seen me with my face plasterd up against your window…

    mayb to far in my first commnt
    hi ladys :)
    i have actully b stalking you…this site is amazing but i was to scrd to leave a comment your awsumsness is quite intimadating!
    but in all seriousness i had to tell you you ARE amazing and im in no way suprised that stephanie loves you :)
    anywhoo thanks for brighting up my days you guys rock i plan on spending a whoole heap more time on here and mayb ill b less shy and comment xD

    • http://letterstotwilight.wordpress.com unintendedchoice

      that was YOUR face outside my window!? I thought it was Robs! :(

      HUGS!

  • milfy goodness

    UC & Moon –

    YAY!!!!!! I love you guys and I am so happy for you! If any Twilight blog deserves the recognition of SM, it is yours.

    I’m not surprised that SM likes LTT. It is easy to forget what a great sense of humor she has since the movie version of Bella & Edward are kind of humorless. But her versions of them are very funny. Not Will Ferrell or Adam Sandberg or Tina Fey funny – but subtle funny. And when you hear her talk in interviews (or read what she says), you can hear her quick wit. Which makes your blog the perfect match for her! Welcome Stephenie!

    So I mostly read LTR on a daily basis, but now I’m going to “force” myself to read LTT, too. I already piss away 1/2 hr each morning (minimum) on Twiblogs – well, really, only LTR usually – so now I’ll piss away an hour. Nice thing about not having a job – it’s not like I’m ignoring anything important except my family, household chores, RL, ect.

  • Steph

    I really wish I could thank Stephenie Meyer directly for her great saga… now maybe I can, since you guys got her reading your blog! That is great!

    Stephenie, if you read this, thanks so much for reiterating that you

  • Tracyface

    Stephenie needs to write ALL four books from Edward’s perspective. Then maybe I will feel complete! Another book would be great but not about Renessme, just Edward & Bella in love….

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