Twilight fans in an uproar over news of Kristen Stewart nudity

Peek-a-boo

Peek-a-boo

Dear Kristen,

Who says we’re not behind you? Who says we’re always so cruel to you? Today’s post is a big ol’ “In yer face” to all those people who hate on us because we may have, once or twice, poked fun at you. Today we’re coming along side of you to tell you how proud we are that you’re taking a stand. We’re cheering you on as you say ‘eff you’ to all the fans who think of you as virginal Bella, holed up in a hotel room with respectful, caring Robward; making love by a fire, sipping champagne through a straw while taking bubble baths together and talking about the names of your future children.

According to a very reliable source:

“The teen star [Kristen] will play a young lap dancer and prostitute in James Gandolfini’s gritty new film Welcome to The Rileys. Reports suggest Stewart walks around naked in many scenes and was so terrified of stripping on camera she insisted Twilight co-star and pal Nikki Reed join her on the set of the film in New Orleans, Louisiana.”

…some fans-turned-critics claim Stewart has “sold out” and wants to safeguard her career versatility by showing a more adult on-screen persona for a change.

Standing up and applauding Girl, it’s about time you bore it all for movie goers in the 12 select cities across the nation who are privileged to a special 3 night showing of your limited release movie. And for the 8,300 people who will buy the DVD. And the 58,000 pervy men who will jack off to your naked scenes found at KristenStewartXXX.com (website ©Moon&UC 2009)

kstewcatfish

The Director told me to spin until the catfish flattens out into the other direction

I love that you are defying expectation and playing a stripper & prostitute and getting naked for all the world internet to see. It’s high time we see some more Twilight stars nude rather than just Ashley & (basically) Kellan. I thought we’d have to wait until Xavier, bitter because making out with a red-headed mom in Eclipse didn’t launch him to stardom, secretly leaks a sex tape of him & Justin Chon to Perez Hilton, but I’m glad we don’t have to wait that long.

Don’t worry about showing off your naked body. It’s not like anyone (aka me) will be comparing themselves to you. No one will even notice your small boobs in action cause they won’t be able to see them, and no one will bask in the glory that my boobs their boobs are larger.  I can’t foresee anyone getting excited over a close up camera angle of your thighs because they could potentially spot some cellulite or spider veins (or at least see the spot where they might show up someday.) And I know that one of the disadvantages of being a skinny girl is that the minute you eat even a grain of rice, you can see it protruding from your belly. But I doubt anyone will notice the fried catfish poking through your middle area that you chowed down on the night before you shot the scene where you’re swinging scantily-clad around a pole. No one has a need to find the inperfections in the woman who is most likely screwing the most beautiful man to currently walk the earth. You don’t have to worry about a thing.

But selfishly I am looking forward to finding out what the above mentioned beautiful man sees in you. Do you have a golden va jay-jay? Will the audience be able to tell the number of kegels you do on a daily basis just by looking at you? Do you have a nice little booty tucked away in those skinny jeans and can you shake it better than Shakira, Fergie & Beyonce combined? And what does Rob see in your small bosom (we know he’s a big jugs man)? Does Heineken come pouring from your nipples with just the softest squeeze?

I know, right? Two words: Photo Shopped

I know, right? Two words: Photo Shopped

I know I tend to surround myself with the best, the brightest, the least 2nd-hand embarrassing, the funniest, the hottest and smartest Twilight fans around, but who are these “Twilight fans in an uproar” that are upset about you showing off your 107 lb frame? I, for one, applaud your artful decision to bare it all. And I promise that after the reviews of the movie come out and compare your portrayal of a stripper to the flopping of a slippery catfish, you can come on over to your friend UC’s house, and I’ll show you how it’s done.

Love,
UnintendedChoice

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  • babiesbrown

    UC – he totally thinks he is! I’m second hand embarrassed for him frequently, but still, he’s got a point!

  • AJ

    Yeah her body is so horrible *eyeroll*. I wish my body was that disgusting. And didn’t Rob once say his celebrity crush is Kate Moss? Yeah.. Don’t think he’s into big boobs.

    You all sound so jealous. I’m jealous of her too, of course. but not delusional enough to make myself believe someone is bad looking when they most definitely aren’t.

    • http://letterstotwilight.wordpress.com unintendedchoice

      who said she was bad looking? did you read the post?

    • themoonisdown

      reading is fundamental!

      • cledbo

        remember the three Rs:
        Reading Snark
        Writing Wit
        Getting Rat-shit Drunk

        Hurrah!

    • AJ

      I just want to clarify that that is NOT me AJ who recently asked Kstew to “take one for the team” (not knowing that she would read it and actually DO it) :(

      I hate it when haters share your name :(

  • http://isuckatbloggingbuticanbite.blogspot.com/ Janetrigs

    I love the funny, and hate the hate. Does that make me jealous? I am not sure…but UC has some balls and that’s just awesome (what she said).

    GO TEAM LAUGH AT SNARK!

  • e

    hmmm, usually you girls make me laugh but not this time. To me this isn’t really funny but seems to be tainted with a little too much negative on Kstew who I think is amazing. However -no matter what the girl does she will get knocked on because of who she is and who everyone presumes she is with. Argh, gross, this one is not cool to me at all.

    • babiesbrown

      For reals? I bet you gave me the thumbs down. So sad. Come on, girls. If we can laugh about how Rob needs to burn the beanie and wash those luscious locks more often, we can laugh about anything. I don’t think any of it’s mean spirited. It’s sarcasm.
      Unless you are actually Steph Meyer in hiding (cause we all know she lurks now), in which case, I agree, Mrs. Meyer. I, too, am completely appalled at the massive insensitivity of UC and Moon. I totally agree that KStew can play a stripper any time she wants and we shouldn’t judge/laugh/point and stare. Cause I’m a littlun’, too. BItty titties, unite!

      • e

        I guess I think it goes to far when we suggest actresses get boob jobs or make fun of their bodies. I’m all about humor, I’ve laughed around this place more than once. Part of the reason I admire and respect KStew is because she is not a sellout, she probably will never get or need a boob job because she is who she is. She’s only 19 and maybe I feel like a little protective of her for some odd reason. This of course is just my opinion. and I’m not Mrs. Meyer but she doesn’t seem like one that would approve of this one. Again just my opinion and of course everyone has a different view and humor about them. I can respect that.

  • leahcyr

    I think its great that Kristen is doing a role like that. Good for her.

    Fyi… Today I walk into my living room to my 25 year old brother throwing my Twilight dvd into the dvd player. And it wasn’t even a i’m-bored-i-haven’t-seen-this-and-i’ll-watch-anything-at-this-point kind of moment. He’d seen it a little while ago, and chose it over a stack of thirty other movies sitting beside my tv.

    Now he didn’t come out and say ‘I loveee the story of bella and edward’.. but I had to leave the room for a second because I was so excited my brother might be part unicorn.

    • Kelly

      All hail the unicorns we love em!

  • zees

    *Better New Name Alert*

    Boob Boob Stewart

  • PinkFluff

    Wow, her body is disgusting?!?!?! My laptop must be screwing up and omitting words on this site! I missed where that was said.

    Should we all start prefacing our opinions with the DEFINITION OF OPINION? With so much hater-fusion things are wonky.

    What I say is not the law. It’s…wait for it, wait for it….
    *****MY***** opinion. *I* do not think she’s attractive outside of photoshoots. This could never just be a personal preference. No, NO, this MUST mean I’m jealous. It’s highly probable I’m ugly, have no boyfriend, need to lose 80lbs and live with 14 cats and a goat. Man, y’all really call ‘em!

    All you haters need to suck it up and drive thru.

    • leahcyr

      *stands whilst applauding*

  • brittanyrenouf

    i say kudos to kristen. isn’t she going to be “bearing it all” in breaking dawn too? The “uproaring” twilight fans need to shut up and realize she PLAYS the character, she’s not Bella.

  • AJ

    I think it’s funny every once in a while, but I think it needs balance like with the rest of the cast. Instead there is no let up on the Kristen hate. Maybe I need to grow more of a sense of humor, I don’t know.

    • Kelly

      I’m sending you humor seeds.. if you stick em in water and love em and tend em they’ll grow.. and before you know it you’ll be laughing you A$$ off like the rest of us :)

  • babiesbrown

    I agree about spreading it around. But I think they do. Notice posts about Ash and her ta ta pics and some hi-lar ones on Niki and Paris Hilton’s old bf. Oh, yeah. It’s thick around here. Nobody is really singling out poor little Kstew. We do heart her. But I’m sorry, you will never find me supporting the mullet or playing a stripper out of solidarity. Give me a break. Is there anything more cliche’ for a young actress? Neither one are attractive. And idc who she’s bangin’! That’s my opinion!

  • Annie

    How absolutely insulting to Stewie. Oh and you know Rob personally to know that he likes big boobs? You jealous bitter bitch. There’s one thing for sure that KStew has that you don’t and that’s Rpattz, jealous much?

    • http://letterstotwilight.wordpress.com unintendedchoice

      see THAT”s what i need! I need to be called a bitch more in my life! love you!!!

      x

      • http://tiffanized.wordpress.com tiffanized

        I have come to believe that all of these are from Kristen. Even if they’re not, it’s fun to imagine her typing these out, her face filled with anger. And want.

        • http://letterstotwilight.wordpress.com unintendedchoice

          hahahahaha

      • http://isuckatbloggingbuticanbite.blogspot.com/ Janetrigs

        UC You’re such a Bitch!

        Ha

  • http://letterstotwilight.wordpress.com unintendedchoice

    Question to ponder: Why do people come out of the woodwork to hate on posts where we make fun of Kristen but not when we make fun of Taycob, Big Daddy, the dude who plays Buttcrack, Justin Chon, ROB, Ash, Kellan, Jackson, ourselves.. should I keep going?

    I’m seriously actually wondering…..! Why is that!? Haters you can comment too. I’d also like a few more thumbs down. My spirits are still too high!

    • zees

      It’s Summit’s Fault

    • leahcyr

      Fact: You make me laugh even when you’re being serious

    • http://letterstotwilight.wordpress.com unintendedchoice

      why has no one given me a thumbs down yet? Annie who called me a jealous bitter bitch, can YOU give me a thumbs down please?

      • leahcyr

        its impossible for us to give you thumbs down UC! we love you like daddy lautner loves his filet-o-fish.

      • http://tiffanized.wordpress.com tiffanized

        I gave you a thumbs down, but I didn’t mean it.

      • Oedipal Art

        Baby, I’ll give you a thumbs down…Love, Rob xo

      • Holly

        I gave you a thumbs down b/c you told me to and you rock. I’m your bitch, UC.

    • http://sparklefortwilight.blogspot.com sft

      Do they? I guess it’s because Kristen has lesser fans in the Twi-world.

      It doesnt really matter though, at least to me it’s always equally amusing whether you like or dont like the people u write about!

      • summergirl

        She obv polarises people, but mainly the hate comes b/c we all want to tap that (him) and she is. Bitch.

        • summergirl

          Just to clarify, I don’t hate on her, and I recognise the sarcasm. I am a fan of the funny.

          But there are peeps in Twi fandom who hate on her b/c of who she is tapping and there are also peeps in Twi fandom who want to be her bff b/c of who she is tapping.

          As granny in Oldham would say:

          “There’s now’t so queer as folk”…….(queer=strange)

          • http://sparklefortwilight.blogspot.com sft

            I’m lost lol… I <3 Kristen, but I meant that despite that I still find LTT amusing

    • babiesbrown

      Aw, UC. I gave you a thumbs up. But srsly, I just remembered I can’t use logic on haters. So they probably won’t follow that laughing when you make fun of Big Daddy’s cheeseburger lovin’ self but freaking when you suggest that KStew’s boobies might be a bit….smallish, would make them not only haters, but hypocrites!
      So sad. But trying is better than working. Cause otherwise I’d be forced to be productive.

      That’s normal!

    • http://twitter.com/brookelockart brookelockart

      I personally enjoy when the haters come out and play. It’s too much love, kisses and hugs around here all the time. The haters give me a chance to channel my inner Kristen, pull out the bitch face and go off.

      PS You haters out there, I’m going to go out on a limb and say that Kristen probably appreciates the humor here and would be faster friends with UC and Moon (if they could tolerate the constant sourpuss face) than any of you out there kissing her tiny non-existent ass.

      and if you want to call someone a bitch, say it to me. I’m ten times the bitch that UC could be and I personally know she’s a sweetheart.

      • http://letterstotwilight.wordpress.com unintendedchoice

        tell them about my small boobs

        • http://twitter.com/brookelockart brookelockart

          if UC’s boobies were on me, I’d have some full Bs, but on her small skinny frame, she’s one busty bitch.

          I say bitch in a loving tone. So do not confuse my terms of endearment for hate, haters.

          • http://letterstotwilight.wordpress.com unintendedchoice

            i like that you obey my commands. tell them about how i love brown betti.

            haha.. that’s what she said…

      • http://isuckatbloggingbuticanbite.blogspot.com/ Janetrigs

        You are a Bitch!

    • themoonisdown

      i gave you a thumbs down!

      blogging partners gotta stick together after all.

      im wondering the same thing, where are the big daddy haters and the rob haters?! we make fun of him an ass ton. and dude the nikki reed haters would want to burn us alive by now. whats up with that?!

  • http://tiffanized.wordpress.com tiffanized

    Hey, tammyO is back! I thought maybe you were checking in as BRaine or Hey Jealous (<=totally sounds like a Gin Blossoms song, right?). I envy the free time you must have to read and comment on blogs run by people you hate. Unless you're Rob extending an offer, in which case UC and a few others amongst us might be more than happy to f*ck you.

    • http://letterstotwilight.wordpress.com unintendedchoice

      here is her latest comment (until they’re not mean to other commenters I’m not approving them)

      “umm UC..new name for you..ugly cougar..do you love it!”

      i DO love it!

      • Oedipal Art

        UC=Uproarious Comments

        And, aren’t you like 24? And beautiful?

        • http://letterstotwilight.wordpress.com unintendedchoice

          26! you can see a picture of me on today’s post over on LTR….I was the one who sent a pic of herself to Rob!

          • http://twitter.com/brookelockart brookelockart

            DAMN GIRL, YOU ARE BUSTY.

          • Oedipal Art

            You’re so hot, but what I’m really lovin’ is the half full trash can, lined with a Wal-Mart bag, in the back of the piccy…CLASS, I tell ya, DAYUM

          • themoonisdown

            COUGAR!!! damn so does that make everyone over 25 one too?!

            uc= uniquely cute

            :)

        • cledbo

          I think you should have a comp for who can come up with the best new meaning of UC, UC!

          My entry:

          Ubiquitous Charisma

          Also – you’re hot!

  • Kristin

    bwhahahahahah!
    i literally just laughed out loud at this.

    Will someone please say this to me?! I love when people get all “FUCK YOU!” What do I need to do?

    • http://letterstotwilight.wordpress.com unintendedchoice

      jump on gmail chat. i’ll yell it at you!

      hate is fun- promise. you’ll get a lot of satisfaction reading the hate when you have the secret knowledge of the conversation you had with moon while you were looking thru pictures of kristen about how gorgeous she is.

      not as gorgeous as kristIN, though. of course
      x

  • babiesbrown

    Tiffanized=WIN.

  • Annie

    UC – Don’t you think there’s enough hatred, bitterness, jealousy and anger directed at Kristen already? Let’s face it does anyone over the age of 12 care about Taylor? and the other names you mentioned are co-stars who do not play a major role in the series. The thing that pisses me off about your “letter” is that you pretend to defend Kristen but then absolutely insult her and her relationship with Rob. Thing is, no matter what you or all the other Kristen haters say, you will never have the success that she has both in her career and love. So keep it up hate on her all you want, she couldn’t care less, it’s rob that will just grow to hate his fans more and more for not respecting his choice.

    • http://letterstotwilight.wordpress.com unintendedchoice
    • leahcyr

      I can’t imagine life without sarcasm. How do you stand it?

    • PinkFluff

      You’re right…SHE probably couldn’t care less. So what’s your excuse?

      No one WANTS HER LIFE. Jesus Tap Dancing Christ. Why is that such a hard point to drive home? Do we need a Power Point presentation on it? Perhaps a pie chart? I’ve got it! Let’s play PICTIONARY!

      Success is relative. Being an actor does not make one successful. Maybe or maybe not snagging a hot actor does not equal success.
      I’m also successfully SANE. This. is. not. serious. It’s a website meant for entertainment. Go make a Robsten icon for your Live Journal page or something and stop reading the blog of 2 awesome people who are apparently SO jealous and SO mean.

      • http://isuckatbloggingbuticanbite.blogspot.com/ Janetrigs

        HOLY FUCKING BALLS OF A GOAT!! Did you just say “Jesus Tap Dancing Christ”? Good GOD! I can’t even say mean things to you now about how much I hate you. That is way too awesome. Oh well, my mean sarcasm is poorly delivered anyhow. I <3 you Pinkfluffy

        • PinkFluff

          I said it. And I meant it. I was exasperated. You could never hate me…ever! I’m irresistible!

      • lapushbaby

        Jesus Tapdancing Christ is my favorite one!

      • http://letterstotwilight.wordpress.com unintendedchoice

        i am laughing too much to type a coherent message back

    • themoonisdown

      wait a second I LOVE TAYLOR!! and im way over 12!

      • PinkFluff

        Shhhhh don’t say that too loud…Chris Hansen might hear. He’s only legal in a few states.

        • themoonisdown

          SHIIIIIIIZZ!!!! i outed myself

    • gizmo

      I was having so much fun reading this post and all the comments, laughing hard with the witty ladies on this blog.. But lately posts have become about explaining sarcastic remarks to some individuals and now all the fun is gone for me.. It’s like killing a good joke – you know when someone tells a joke to a person who doesn’t get it and then tries to explain the joke, but the person still doesn’t get it.. then there’s this awkward moment when both are silent and thinking “who’s crazy here?”.. Yeah, that’s how I feel.. I’ve had enough for the day.. Nothing good can come out of trying to explain a joke..
      UC and Moon, keep those letters coming and no need for *insert sarcasm*s.. Those who get it, get it..
      xx

      • alyssa

        totally agree! I thought the post was hilarious, but people comment without reading everything and they just end up saying the same bullshit that someone else has already said… if you don’t get it and you don’t think it’s funny. LEAVE.
        You aren’t being forced to read this, it’s a choice! Stop ruining the joke for everyone else.

  • babiesbrown

    Oi. I get it! It’s one of those crazed fans. You know, the one that *SwearS* she understands that Rob and KStew are not Bella and Edward, but then misinterprets sarcasm as a personal attack on the sanctity of Bella and Edward (no, wait, Robsten’s) budding relationship.
    This has been fun today! Keep it coming!

  • Jaybird

    Wow, just wow.

    I just got done putting the baby down for a nap and came to check the comments (cause you know there’s some funny shizz in there). Why is everyone so angry? Why are they reading your blog? Do they really think that you would blog about someone you truly hated?

    I just wanted to send some love your way. I love you UC (and Moon too, but she is doing Rob today, so she is getting her own kind of lovin’). You know I don’t say that lightly, I really mean it. I only tell my hubbers, kiddos, family, neighbors, friends, postman, milkman, kids’ teachers, oh and ROB that I love them. OK so I do say it alot, but I really mean it. Really, really I do!

    I love you and I will give you a thumbs up and disguise it as a thumbs down, but you know what I mean!

    I love Kstew too! (Don’t want any F-you’s thrown at me)

  • southernbelle

    Wow I missed the drama here! LOL

    We need that article about sarcasm here for some people who don’t get it.

  • Annie

    It’s just difficult to know EXACTLY what you are being sarcastic about? Standing up for Kristen? Excited that she’s that she’s stripping for a movie? Wanting to see it so you will see exactly why Rob’s crazy about her? That you are surrounded by the “smartest” Twilight fans ? Sarcasm can be used in many ways and I usually enjoy it because it’s funny, yours was not, it was very mean spirited against someone you don’t even know. I’m guessing your buddy Moon saw more at that BL concert than she’s admitted to in press so the claws against Kristen will come out.

    • http://letterstotwilight.wordpress.com unintendedchoice

      Moon isn’t my buddy. she’s my fake lesbian life partner

      • babiesbrown

        UC! I am died. That was the wittiest thing ever. So pissed I have to go home now and miss the rest of this. I’ll check back in tonight after my kiddos are asleep so I can see if she ever accidentally types “B&E” instead of R&K.
        Good luck!

      • themoonisdown

        shhhh thats OUR little secret. ok maybe not we talk about it on the blog all day every day.

        and no i didnt see anything else besides the three of them getting into the cab AND IT WAS AWESOME!!! i SAW ROB AND KRISTEN! HAHAHAHA

    • gizmo

      Annie, I don’t think it’s meant to go that deep.. Girls just wanna have fun!

  • http://letterstotwilight.wordpress.com unintendedchoice

    I’m really enjoying “call UC a bitch and tell her F*ck you” day, but I have to go to Bible study. (hahahhahahaa.. actually i’m not kidding)

    I love you haters. I love you lovers. I love you “i don’t give a crappers”

    I hope we all had our “Cullen Smiles” today….

    • Lindelle

      Make sure to say an “unspoken prayer request” for the comment frenzy here today, after your discussion of the latest chapter of The Shack.

      –Cullen Smiles from your fellow church-joke appreciator ;)

    • HeyyyBrother

      I <3 you for enjoying all of this. It makes you that much more awesome in my eyes.

      I can't believe I missed all of this today! ARGH. You guys got to have all the fun without me :(

  • Annie

    Who are Bella & Edward? Kristen & Rob, drink, smoke, and have wild sex with each other so I really don’t think there’s any confusion between the two. I think you here are confused that Rob is just dying to be screwing you! Keep waiting on that one but I wouldn’t hold my breath.

    • themoonisdown

      wait, do you have a video of said wild sex?!

    • http://twitter.com/brookelockart brookelockart

      I’m tired of writing comments so whenever I don’t like a post, i will now give the sad clown face:
      :-(

      You have been sad clowned.

      • http://isuckatbloggingbuticanbite.blogspot.com/ Janetrigs

        :)

    • Oedipal Art

      Wait, Edward and Bella DON’T have wild sex, drink, and smoke? What the hell have I been watching?

    • babiesbrown

      Wow. They probably do actually do all those things. B/c you totally stalk them. I’ve got you figured out now, Annie. You’re one of those ppl that follows them everyplace and collects their cigarette butts to put in your little Edward and Bella shrine at home. You keep all that stuff, plus shiz like RPattz’s pop cans and KStew’s used lighters, until you run out of $. They you auction some of it on Ebay to pay for your next trip to Vancouver to stand outside that sushi place and pray you get lucky again. It’s out now! You are pissed at Moon b/c she spotted them together and totally stole your thunder with that cabbie pic. I don’t blame you, honey. Bitch totally didn’t deserve to see Edward and Bella leaving together like that. I mean, KStew and Rob. B/c stalking is hard effing work and Moon totally had not put the work into it! Where is her bodyguard – given bruise? Where are her frequent flier miles and collections of plaid shirts carefully procured from second hand shops in the real Forks, WA? You’re upset b/c you are clearly the original stalker fan, and these two twits think they run a cute little fan blog? Bitch, pleeassee!
      (Insert sarcasm. I love ya’lls. Best. Day. Ever.)

      • babiesbrown

        God. I have spelling errors. Forgive me!

  • Holly

    This is like, the BEST day ever on LTT! I can NOT walk away from my computer. I’m just waiting for Annie’s next comment.

  • Freya

    Fact: Kristen has smallish boobs. Strippers generally do not.

    Fact: Kristen has no ass.

    Fact: UC and Moon are appropriately using sarcasm on their websites, and the haters need to move along to a site where the mission is to bury their heads far up KStew’s ass in hopes of a big KStew Lovers Appreciation Orgy with Robsten. (Who wouldn’t take sloppy seconds in that scenario?)

    I enjoy facts.

    Bears. Beets. Battlestar Galactica.

    • http://twitter.com/brookelockart brookelockart

      You get the happy clown!
      :-)

      You have been happy clowned.

    • themoonisdown

      i love alliteration freya!

    • http://iheartrobward.blogspot.com jtwilightaddict

      Yes! A Dwight reference! love it.

    • http://isuckatbloggingbuticanbite.blogspot.com/ Janetrigs

      :) :)

    • http://letterstotwilight.wordpress.com unintendedchoice

      FACT: i love you

  • JanuaryMorning

    im sorry to say this- but this might be the first day where the comments outshone the post. people were HILARIOUS! and obviously all the haters did NOT read the sarcasism post hahahah

    great job today EVERYONE.

    • themoonisdown

      thats saying A LOT! cause this post is SOOO WIN and so are the crazy comments!

      <3!!!!

    • http://letterstotwilight.wordpress.com unintendedchoice

      i agree. i’m dying right now catching up on them

  • http://iheartrobward.blogspot.com jtwilightaddict

    Wow. This is the first time I actually read through all the comments. I laughed as much reading them as I did reading the post!!!
    Love this post. Love UC. Love the comments!

  • http://isuckatbloggingbuticanbite.blogspot.com/ Janetrigs

    Ok am done. I just enjoyed saying I hate you, you’re a bitch, and copying Brookie’s sad and happy faces. Wasn’t that what the post was about today? Oh well.
    :) :( :) :(
    Jesus Tap Dancing Christ to you all!

  • calliope

    Dear haters,
    I am a close friend of UC and just over a week ago had lunch with her where we discussed in detail how to better promote the “respect kstew” campaign. Your worries and misunderstandings regarding her feelings to the stew are simply unfounded and misconstrued. I can assure you she daily changes her sneakers to match those of stewie and may or may not be rocking a dark mullet as a sign of solidairty with the stew. Why, just last month, when the prego rumours were rampant, our dear UC was handing out flyers at sports games and in bars and at bobby long concerts that read

    THERE AIN,T NO BUN IN HER OVEN, SHE’S JUST MISSIN’ RPATTZ’S LOVIN’!*** RESPECT KSTEW***

    She even made shirts. I know, because I have one. (A steal at $10) so my point is, you’ve totally mistaken UC for a stewie nonlover. For shame. For. Shame.

    Hugs and kstew bitchfaces,
    Calli

    P.S. Don’t mess with me. I heart the stew.
    P.P.S. I wrote this post on a blackberry… Do I get fan points for that?
    P.P.P.S. I’ve got no effing clue what fan points are but I want them

    • http://sparklefortwilight.blogspot.com sft

      “I wrote this post on a blackberry… Do I get fan points for that?”

      LMAO I have two left thumbs when it comes to texting so humongous points for you… proper punctuation and all!

    • BrookeLockart

      Fan points started with the other haters taking away Moon’s fan points for the cab pic. Now fan points allow you to fly on Air Rob.

      :-)

      You have been happy clowned.

      • calliope

        Oh yes… I remember that day. I was MIA for fan points discussion but clearly I am quietly working on racking tjem up bc I plan on flying AirRob first class home from italy.

    • themoonisdown

      i LOVE your face and thats like 50 fan points for composing on a blackberry! i should know i do it every other night and at bars. seirously i write blogs on my phone.

      and where can i get one of these tshirts?!

      ps i own AIR ROB which you can redeem your fan points for flights on

      • calliope

        Dude you should get serious fan points for typing from the phone… Anyone who is a phone typer should get serious fan points. Shit. Is. Hard. I feel like a pre-pubescent kid learning to jerkoff for the first time my hand hurts so much. I might get carpul tunnel syndrome from this rant. But fan points r worth it no?!? It had to be said.

        Oh and UC and I are going to open up a etsy shop for the shirts…. Or perhaps a cafe press site so peeps have more options. We’ll also be doing special edition flannel versions… LOok for them late fall ’09.

        • http://twitter.com/brookelockart BrookeLockart

          I used to soley comment from my blackberry, then I decided that I don’t give a fuck about Big brother at work and post straight on the site.

          So back in March and April, all those long ass posts under my other name were on my bberry.

          I give myself a nice pat on the back. And maybe a coach seat on AirRob.

    • http://isuckatbloggingbuticanbite.blogspot.com/ Janetrigs

      You can have all my fan points from today as well as the one’s I stole from UC earlier. Heart you.

    • babiesbrown

      That effing rawked! I am checking in again after putting the kiddos down and I am in danger of waking them all up. I almost snorted when I read the t-shirt slogan. For reals. Snorted. Like those dorky band girls do (b/c I am a lover of this blog and do obv a promoter of hate towards others!). Sigh. Can’t wait to see what else went on while I was out.

    • http://letterstotwilight.wordpress.com unintendedchoice

      come back to me!!! and bring me some good wine!!

  • Kelly

    Fan points for commenting on a Blackberry?! I get some too!! I’m on blackberry time right now.

    I’ve read through todays post and the ensuing comments and this thought comes to mind:

    Tis better to be a smart a$$ and laugh than be laugh at because you are a dumb a$$.

    Just sayin’ :)

  • blvr

    Holy crap! I worked late today and am just seeing this shiznitz. I can’t believe the haters that come out of the woodwork for this post!?! UC, Moon, love, love, love you guys and totally respect your high road today. Cuz like Barney Frank says, arguing with some folks is like arguing with the dining room table, it’s just not interesting. (except today, it’s really f’in interesting…and funny…and disturbing!) Love you, KStew!

  • calliope

    PPPPS

    Know what makes UC forget the haters hate?!?!

    SEPIA TONED ROB PICS

    • http://letterstotwilight.wordpress.com unintendedchoice

      oh.my.gosh

      i DIEDDDDDDDDDDDDDDD

  • Becca West

    One thing is very clear….. I am a fan of a fan!!! Seriously?? Kegels?? lol!!!!
    Good times.

  • Holly

    It is 9:23 here in the Central Time Zone and I have been reading these comments all damn day. I can not say it has been a wasted day, though, b/c this post and the comments (mostly the comments) saved me time on my ab workout. I have been LMAO all the live long day. Mr. Holly even got into it today. He enjoys catty bitches. I think he’s turned on. Thanks, haters… you just scored me some good schmexy times.

  • Annie

    Glad you all enjoyed my posts today. You can all try to justify yourselves away claiming to be Stewie fans but I’ve read your posts and comments before and I respectfully disagree. I also disagree with the fact that Rob is a “big jugs man” as evidenced by this photo http://twitpic.com/fa8kx And as I said, no worries, you ladies keep hating on K and she will keep laughing at you as she’s screwing Rob and you are all just dreaming about it.

    • JodieO

      “And as I said, no worries, you ladies keep hating on K and she will keep laughing at you as she’s screwing Rob and you are all just dreaming about it.”

      She will? If I was screwing Rob the last thing I’d be thinking about would be the women and unicorns of the LTT.

      Ok, that’s probably not true. I’d probably have a camera set up so they could all drown in jealousy as I scream out “Choke on that, Bitches!”

  • Annie

    Did you guys delete all my posts? So everyone that disagrees with you, you delete? That’s brillant! Then you go ahead and try and justify that you are Kristen fans. You are so FOS

    • BrookeLockart

      oh double sad clown

      :-( :-(

      • Holly

        Is there something wrong with my dumputer? I still see Annie’s comments. Still giggling, btw. Am I not supposed to see them anymore?

        • HeyyyBrother

          I see them too… I’m sure it’s all just some heinous conspiracy cooked up but that kstew-hating bitch, UC. She’s probably hidden the haters’ own comments from themselves so that they just get more riled up and leave more nasty comments.

        • cledbo

          Yeah I still see the one where she claims to know what sarcasm is, and then uses another 5 sentences proving that she doesn’t. You know, EXACTLY.
          :D

          and I love the sad clown. That’s coming across into RL with me – anyone who does something dumb in my vicinity is going to get verbally sad clowned from now on.

    • Freya

      Deep breaths, Annie. They’re all still there. Over and over again, your vitriol lives on.

  • HeyyyBrother

    Holy Scandal, Batman! HOW DID I MISS THIS!? Ugh. Today was an especially crazy day at work, so I didn’t check back on LTT obsessively like I usually do. Honestly, I didn’t think there was anything particularly scandalous about today’s post so NEVER expected this.

    I LOVE LOVE LOVE UC, Moon, and all of the regulars here who have senses of humor — for actually having a good time with all this nonsense today. I’m so sorry to have missed the cattiness :( Damn work getting in the way of all the fun.

    btw, let it be known that sarcasm is my favorite thing in the world. How do you people function without an appreciation for it!?

    • cledbo

      I love your comments on KSWI btw – u are one funny chica :)
      And I’m still at work – in a very different time zone of course. This post has been entertaining me allllll day!

  • what?

    You guys do know they took the scene of Kristen naked out of the script right?

  • Pingback: Twitter Trackbacks for Twilight fans in an uproar over news of Kristen Stewart nudity « Letters to Twilight [letterstotwilight.wordpress.com] on Topsy.com

  • leahcyr

    Wow… Went out last night, came home just now, pop open my laptop, and I have 140 new ‘comment notice’ emails for this post.. Insaneee.. I couldn’t be bothered to read them.. but.. my last two cents is..

    I heart this post.
    And thx haters for the good chuckles.

  • luvbnwani

    ROTFLMAO at the “reviews compare your portrayal of a stripper to the flopping of a slippery catfish”….a catfish though, too funny

  • mewe

    this is so disgusting of kristen, i no longer respect her. selling her body and modesty for money or fame, disgraceful. how greedy can humans be. what a real life prostitute! i used to like u kristen but i cant help but feelin ashamed of u now!

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