Breaking Down Swiftner aka we heart Taylor Lautner and Taylor Swift HARD!

Dear LTT-ers and Robsteners,

We so get it now! After the pictures of the Taylors (aka Swiftner) came out this week and the ensuing letters I wrote to them UC and I fangirled out (it was mostly a lot of high pitched “oh-em-geeing) half the day about Swiftner and how much we loved them. I started watching the clips commenters posted in the letters to the Taylors post and I knew I had a new addiction. Here’s UC and I breaking it down…

The one where I “come out”
I officially sound like the Swiftner version of a robsten fan*
UC hahahahahahha and i like it SO much more!
Moon Yes, it’s not nearly as annoying or annoying at ALL
UC RIGHT! just cute!
Moon dude ive SO watched like 2 videos of him at her concert in Chicago. Stop me
UC: hahahahahhahaha love it!
Moon: people are posting them in the comments. She sings 15 in the audience in front of Taylor and then comes to hug the folks where he’s sitting and when she hugs him and the crowd goes nuts. its SOOO embarrassing. im embarrassed for them. and then they do that lingering hand holding thing as she walks away. Swiftner lives folks! hahahaha
UC: awwwww!!!! sooo cute!!!!
Moon its super cute
UC dude.. that’s amazing. Send me the link to the video

Moon: OMG!!! HAHAHA its even more embarrassing from this other angle
UC: Watching! Awwww!
UC he’s like “i love you” SOO cute! what if he sang? i’d die if he started singing along with her!
Moon: HAHAHAH they need to do a duet. I hope taylor has seen taylors crappy student video

Follow the cut to see us have an epiphany and plot our Swiftner love blog

The one where Taylor Swift “speaks to us”
i bet i’d cry at her show b/c i get sappy at stuff that reminds me of when i’m a teenager. even though SHE doesn’t, she’s just SO that girl!
Moon: SHE IS!! i so would get sappy too! She speaks to my inner high schooler for realz

The one where she uses her feminine wiles to lure him in and UC remembers an embarrassing story about me!
her doing the hair flip is so getting to him
UC: hahahah hair flip. she’s showing off
Moon: totally!!! right in front of him and he laughs!
UC: probably dared her to
Moon: we totally robstening out right now, fyi!
UC: i just tweeted i’m a tay/tay shipper on my personal twitter
Moon: I tweeted on LTT: uc and i may or may not be breaking down this SWIFTNER chicago concert clip like we’re robsten fans
UC: omg is she SINGING to him? or just to that side?
Moon: other angle:

UC: he can SOO see her hoo ha!
Moon: she has her legs crossed cause she’s a lady!
UC he won’t even look at her. he’s too embarrassed
Moon: hes in <3
UC: SOO in love!
Moon: you know when you like someone a lot and its hard to look at them?! SO this moment
UC: YES SOOO this moment. Like you in the garage with that boy you liked
Moon: HAHHA yes
UC: my fav story ever. Next to my drunk bread story
Moon: its better to look away than to risk total embarrassment. that was SOOO embarrassing

The one where we’re in love and we GET IT
UC: i’m in love. with their love. is this how it feels to be a robsten fan?
Moon: I think so! It’s kind of addictive! We SOOO get it now!!
Moon: DANGIT! i’m addicted! I totally started following her on twitter last night and she tweeted about listening to “paparazzi” while being chased by the paparazzi and i was like DUDE shes SOOO with him! why else would she be chased?
UC: yess!

The one were we SQUEE about hand holding
i haven’t finshed the vid yet!
Moon: look at the hands when they part and she walks away
UC: awww big hug. awwwwwww
UC: OMG! ahhh! I see it! it’s love! I bet they have the same arm band on
Moon: of course, It’s probably a shoestring with pop tops on it. Taylor made it on the tour bus between shows.
UC just SQUEED when i saw the hand hold!
Moon: SEE!!!
UC: i get it! i get it now! i get how robsteners feel (the crazy ones at least*). I still think they’re absolutely fucking crazy b/c kristen is the WORST for rob. I mean uh, did I say that out loud? 😉
Moon: oh 100% i think this is actually GOOD!! like theyre a good match. robsten? not so much

The one where Selena Gomez better watch her back!
Moon let’s write a Swiftner fanfic
UC: yes! it can take place in Nashville
Moon: yes and the taylors will have matching white horses
UC: and matching rainbow sweaters and glitter will rain down from the heavens
Moon: So after writing a Swiftner FanFic the next step in this shipping is for me to create a Swiftner fanvid, right?!
UC: hahaha
Moon: then we’ll change our avatars to black and white pictures of them cause their love is timeless and beautiful!
UC: okay, what about a Swiftner love blog?
Moon: YESSS!!! It’s so ours!
Moon: then we’ll go on Selena Gomez fan sites and start bashing her and the commenters with stuff like: you’re DELUSIONAL if you don’t think they’re together!! and we’ll call all the 14yr old fans fat and ugly
UC: they are so ugly if they don’t believe
Moon: DUH and have NO life and wish it was THEM!

The one where we debunk a common Robsten argument
Moon: OKKK sooo this brings up the HUGE argument the robstens bring up for robsten not being public
UC: what is that?
Moon: that SUMMIT wont let them be together in public because it ruins “the allure.” So if that was true it would most defs be true for TAYLOR since he’s the cats pajamas in New Moon
Moon: if that whole nonsense was true than theyd want lil tay tay free and single
UC: right!!
Moon: Robsten rumor DEBUNKED!

Dude, you guys loving Swiftner is SO fun! I hope we see them prancing in “the meadow” on a pair of matching unicorns soon. Get to work paparazzi!

So what do you think of all this Swiftner love? Now People’s talking about it, and I saw it on the cover of OK mag yesterday right under a Robsten article which I bypassed for the Swiftner news. TRUE STORY!


*Robsten fans – when we say Robsten fans we’re mostly refering to the crazy cuss you out, call you names, it’s their way or the highway, Robsten is tru fax and there’s no other way it could be, kind of people! We’re not talking about the COOL Robsteners like our gal Calli and others who love them some Robsten but also are psycho freaks and “GET IT.” It’s kinda like when we make fun of Twimoms, we’re not making fun of every mom who likes twilight, just the crazy ones! Kapishe?

Discuss your love or hate of Swiftner over at The Forum
UC gives Rob a REAL interview! LTR

Wanna hear Taylor call Taylor Tay-Tay?! Listen here!

  • lilnelablack

    I <3 Swiftner.
    She's so good for him.
    And it keeps Taylor from hanging out with KStew & Nikki Reed, who are bad for anyone including Rob!

  • TeamSeth

    Hello all. I’ve got some good news and some bad news!
    Good news: I’ve finally found some work.
    Bad news: It’s a short term contract all the way in Florida 🙁 This is bad because:
    1) I won’t get to see the NM premiere in Port Angeles
    2) I’m going to be busy the next week getting stuff wrapped up here before i head off into the humidity, so I won’t get to comment as much
    3) The contract is going to require a lot of OT, so I may not be on as much for the next couple of months.

    I’m very sad about this…especially #1. So unfair. Anyway, I’ll be reading the blog itself still…just probably later in the day. The good news with that is that I’ll be commenting around the same time as I always do since I’ll be on Eastern time and not Pacific! 🙂

    About today’s post: Can I also be I don’t give a swift crapner?

    • Pinky

      I gave you a thumbs down because I’ll miss your comments, but employment…(like green) is good.

      • TeamSeth

        yeah, purple’s cool.

        I’m gonna go cry now. Thanks for the thumbs down. (except i’m not gonna cry, cuz I have to edit my chapter for my novel group, which i’m still holding next week even though I fly out two days later. i’m so overexerting here. some guy i met with today about a volunteer thing told me I had the proper organizational skill set to promote, manage, and freelance. if only the employers hiring FT would see that.)

    • southernbelle

      Team Seth- congratulations and keep us posted! This calls for a celebration! We’ll miss you here though.

      • TeamSeth

        Thanks. I designed wine and beer labels for everyone to use at their NM parties. UC and Moon promised to post them as part of their “How to throw your NM party” posts. Let’s see if they keep that promise…

        • TeamSeth

          Um, that was in response to your “calls for celebration” part of the post.

        • ambushed by twilight

          OOOOOH! gimmie-gimmie-gimmie! i wanna be able to party-harty! twi-style!

          • TeamSeth

            patience, young padewon.

          • beth

            TeamSeth – Congrats on the job! Sorry you won’t make the Port Angeles premiere. 🙁

            I gave you a thumbs up for padawan. Bringing SW into a Twilight blog = win 😀

          • TeamSeth

            @beth I gave you a thumbs up for liking that I brought SW to the Twi blog. My boyfriend was very proud of me for doing so hehe. Also, I’m going as padme for halloween! 🙂

            Yeah, it’s gonna be rough not leaving the theater to be greeted by freezing cold rain. Oh well.

            Also, what the hell is your avatar?!

        • southernbelle

          Can’t wait to see them Team Seth! 🙂

    • fangbanger06

      Congrats on the job! 🙂

    • ambushed by twilight

      OH! well that’s mostly a good thing right?! $$$ Now we’ll be on the same coast! CONGRATS!

      i will keep in touch with you by e-mail when ever i can.

      is your SO miss you badly? cross country… a long way… i hope you have a safe trip… WHAT ABOUT YOUR TICKETS?! did you pre-purchase?

      what are you writing about for your group? what’ll they do while you’re gone?

      and yes, of course you can be a “I don’t give a swift crapner”…

      • TeamSeth

        SO and I are very sad. Let’s not talk about that.

      • TeamSeth

        Oh, and on the tickets (at first I thought you meant airplane tix for going to visit my parents for Christmas)…I didn’t buy them yet. Not to worry, I’ve already found a group of Twi-hard twenty-somethings to accompany me. My friend said, “I plan on going for sure opening night, maybe not the midnight though.” “That’s fine. HP6 midnight didn’t turn out so well.” “Yes, I also plan on going more than once, just so you know.” “Excellent.”

    • Ang

      Congratulations TeamSeth! Sorry you won’t be with as often, but I KNOW how great it feels to find work that you will be paid for!

    • tuesdaymidnight

      Congratulations on the gainful employment!! I hope you can keep commenting a little… and sharing Billy porn. 😉

      I was trying to think of the “I-don’t-give-a…” equivalent for Swiftner and I really like “I-don’t-give-a-swift-crapner.” “Swift crapner” just rolls off the tongue.

      • TeamSeth

        Doesn’t it! I felt that way.

        I’ll keep the Billy porn a-comin’. And for sure on Nov. 25th in honor of his 45th or 44th bday.

    • Illegalwolflover

      Congrats TS
      I’m giving u this for the highs… 🙂
      and this for the lows….. 🙁

      • TeamSeth

        Thanks 😉

        Maybe you can send me some kiwis to cheer me up! And I do mean the birds and not the fruit. We’ve got the fruit all over the place here.

        • Illegalwolflover

          I’ll try my best to grab one….if it doesnt get to you, it means that ive been jailed for abducting a protected species….

          oh what the hey….incarcerated for a bird…wolf….either way i’m screwed…

          I wont be able to guarantee that the kiwi will be breathing though….those small plastic envelopes are preeetty pricey…. lol

          i know what its like being uprooted…ill send a prayer upto the big guy for u…. 🙂

          disclaimer – i love animals…i wont send one unless i get an A4 size envelope at least….

          • TeamSeth

            Yeah, A4 at the minimum! Not like our printers over here even know how to handle A4 paper.

            Check out my latest post with the link to the awesome comic I just made.

    • lovemesomecullens

      Oh, you are an OT? Awesome.
      Ever do any work with kids? We need OT’s very badly in our area, great pay, with the state’s early intervention program….

      • TeamSeth

        I meant overtime for OT. What’s an OT?

        • TeamSeth

          Nevermind! I could google it, so I did 😉 No, I’m a writer/editor.

  • At first I thought meh, but yeah they are totally cute. And totally making me nostalgic for my adolescence.

  • TeamSeth

    I do have to say, I saw their pic on People mag too at Target yesterday and thought of LTT. I thought, “Oh wow, LTT is ahead of Us Weekly and People in their rumour assessment.” I felt privileged to be part of something so elite. 😉

  • southernbelle

    Totally random but I was just shopping at Forever 21 and the girl who helped me that worked there looked so much like Taylor Swift! I had to do a double take to make sure it wasn’t her! She was really tall too!

    I think Taylor and Taylor look absolutely cute together.

    Taylor squared = young love, sweet love!

  • fangbanger06

    Our dear little T-Swift is in the news…

    Remember kids, taking a photograph with a dude wearing a universal sign of hate is always a bad idea.

    • fangbanger06

      *cue backlash

    • ambushed by twilight

      backlash indeed… yikes…yeah, bad photo-op for sure… *shudder* that was stupid so she must not have been thinking about what was on his shirt… she’s 19 after all.

      i’ll make a conscience desicion to overlook this laps in judgment… this once… looks like a stupid party anyway, all that paint flickin… whatever. she better watch her reputation and that’s not the way to do it.

    • TeamSeth

      Can we please say how retarded is it that people think JH stands for Jew Hater. I mean seriously people? Seriously? Do 19 year olds who sing about horses and trucks and broken teenage hearts give a crap about hating/not hating Judaism? NO!!!!!! So ridiculous. When I looked at the photo I immediately thought, “Wow, that guy is unfortunate looking and it’s too bad that those American Apparel glasses are still in fashion. ugh.” then I thought, “I wonder if JH is a guy or a girl? Let’s see what they say about the rumours in conflict with the Taylor rumours!” Oh wait, no, they’re just saying that it might mean Jew Hater but probably doesn’t because some chick at the party’s initials were JH. oh em gee, people.

      • yeah “JH” was for Julianne Hough who she has recently become BFFs with. Julianne painted “TS” on her own outfit at Katy Perry’s bday party. Taylor tweeted about it how they both left with their initials on each other. Taylor should never get bad press! She’s just too sweet!

        • fangbanger06

          HA! I didn’t read the part about JH meaning jew hater.

          That is a new level of stupid. Of course, the little darling shouldn’t get bad press.

          She is sickeningly sweet. Like those church girls I couldn’t stand… That were secretly effing the whole football team.

          Not saying TSwift is effing anybody. Don’t know. Don’t care. My point was watch who you are with and what you are doing while taking a photo! 😀

  • marie

    Swiftner! oh how I love this – what film are they making together? someone help please

    • Illegalwolflover

      its called “Valentine’s Day” 🙂

  • jacob’sgirlanjaeldest

    I’m afraid I just can’t believe this whole swiftner thing… you see, I am engaged to marry Taylor L. He doesn’t actually know this yet… but it WILL happen. I’m working out a plan…my friend’s great aunt is friends with his agent, which is gonna be helpful. I hope. 😛

  • i <3 this post.

  • I am Emmy and i have no confidence. I have no confidence because my dad left my mum 3 years ago, and my older brother blamed me. I started blogging to take my mind of it, but i didnt advertise so nobody followed….I started a blog today, and it will have ots of gossip and twilight news every day….

    I have already mention LTT in one of my first posts…. I would really like if some one coud comment or join….

    Keep Dreaming, Emmy
    BTW I am keeping my REAL identity secret like you, UC and Moon, incase my friends find out and laugh at me…

    i love you LTT

    And i LOOOOVVVEEEE Swiftner…. xx

  • TeamSeth

    So, this had to be made. Sorry it’s a little small. I’m not sure what happened.

    The text goes like this:
    Kayne: Imma be such a jerk right now that Obama calls me out for being a jackass.
    Taylor: WTF, mate. Didn’t you see my rap video about being on a boat?

    Beyonce: Whoa. What is going on?

    Taylor: Some kind of animal attack. ::smirk::


    • Illegalwolflover


      It has come to pass as i expected….

      U truly are the goddess of must-watch tv….

      • TeamSeth

        I’m still pissin’ my pants when I look at this…and I made the darn thing.

  • TeamSeth

    I’ve just set up my NM viewing with a huge group of other Twi-hards at the theater in Orlando that serves beer. I’m sooooooooo excited. 🙂

    • TeamSeth

      So Twi-hard that today they put up a full size cut-out Edward in one girl’s cube since it was her birthday. Um, AMAZING!

  • Hi again Moon. You know already know how I feel about you now since becoming one of my Taylor Swift friends. I come home from work to a double feature Taylor post made my day complete. I was already giddy when I got into my office and logged onto Just Jared and saw 30+ pictures of them on their date. I was smiling like an idiot at my desk when I saw that Taylor was the one driving them, because he is a man and she is the lady and that’s how it should be on a date–even though she’s older and technically he’s not yet a man (and now I’m imagining Britney’s song, Not a Girl Not Yet a Woman: Lautner edition).

    Tell me you have seen her on Ellen today. I just watched it on DVR and when she was asked about him, I was smiling so much my face hurt. Why are we so enthralled by their new love? I’ve never even been this excited for my own relationship, and these are people I dont even know!

  • Illegalwolflover

    this is my last post for the day i hope…just a few thoughts after seeing the “date” photos

    1) nothing would break my heart more or make me happier than them saying theyre just friends….(im conflicted all of a sudden…im so wierd…sorry…) maybe cause i dont want them to fail and hear “buff bastard” on the radio….

    2) Tay Tay’s good taste extends to cars….maybe ill come back in my next life as an audi rather than an ’86 rabbit (cus it might be the only way he gets into me…thatswatshesaid)

    3) I have been inspired to take my male BFF fo dinner and shopping…Fiance will not sit around like Tay does…

    4) I want to be an “i dont give a swift crapner” but the cuteness is dragging me back in…..


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  • I am SOOOOO a Swiftner shipper. They’re so cute it’s painful. In a good way.

    Not gonna lie, I’m a little sad TayTay is off the market. But, on the bright side, maybe I’ll stay outta jail till February.

  • tiffany3482

    So funny thing my old roomate is currently on tour with Taylor Swift (she is one of her dancers.) I wonder if she has run into legal in Georgia… I’ll have to call her to find out. I will let you all know the back stage scoop…

  • TeamSeth

    So I just finished rereading NM for the third time. I gotta say, that last line in the epilogue made me say (out.loud.), “Gag.” Now, before you run to your bookshelf, I’ll just copy it down for you here:

    I squared my shoulders and walked forward to meet my fate, with my destiny solidly at my side.

    I miss Jacob.

    • Illegalwolflover

      oh thank god….i miss the sarcasm, humour. cockiness and the complete imperfection that is Jake by then….
      that line is so Harlequin Romance…it makes me throw up a little in my mouth….Fabio-ward….lol…

      but then ive always been biased…. 😉

  • quitesimplyepic

    I’m beginning to love Swiftner. They’re adorable.

  • rufa

    They’re cute. But I totally missed how/when/where they got together. Can anyone enlighten me? Thanks!

    • rufa, they met while filming their storyline together in the upcoming movie Valentines Day!

      • rufa

        Awww sweet! Thanks for your reply!

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  • Therese

    man, I am hung up on the Taylors. I am meant to writing an assignment for uni and I have just spent that alst hour watching youtube videos of Swift and looking at pictures of Taycob. The ellen interview with Swift was awesome as. You should post it.

  • Amanda Propaganda

    It’s just really hard to imagine people getting that warm, fuzzy feeling you get watching the Taylors about the HORRIFIC possibility of Kristen and Rob being a real life couple. No, I have never understood the Robstenadvocacymania…being a strict Nonstener…but seriously. These two are wholesome and cute, and Robsten is like one of the four horsemen of the apocalypse…the two of them together makes me feel like The End of Days is coming. Yes, Kristen is HORRIBLE for Rob. I said it.

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