LTT Mailbag – The Crazies email us (again)

MAIL CALL!!!

Dear LTT-ers, Twilight cast members, characters and Stephenie Meyer,

Of course you guys know that we’re NOT you and we don’t answer emails written to characters or Rob (unless we’re bored and intern Rob needs busy work) but we definitely read them, pass them back and forth and then post them here for all of us to enjoy. You can’t get the crazy in your inbox and NOT share with your pals!

Dear Stephenie,

This letter is for you personally… I am a fan but I’m not obsessed with it… I just want to know why you didn’t have more go on with bella and jacob… I think it would have be better if you had edward leave for a reason and bella went to jacob… they go off to college to get away from it all and then….. edward make an appearance… bella think she’s thinks she is seeing things and doesn’t think to much… but than she starts seeing him more and more… then……………… jacob and edward start battling for bella because she can no longer choose between them… that book should have been between the thrid and fouth… Also in the fourth one you shouldn’t make jacob fall in love with a baby… I’m just saying this because people on my rez even agree with me

Love,
Britbrit

Dear Britbrit,

I’m glad you’re not one of “those fans.” You know, the kind that writes a letter to a random blog thinking it’s me, thinking I’m just looking for new story lines for my completed saga that doesn’t fit into the original story AT ALL. I’m thankful you’re not that kind of fan. Thanks for the ideas, I’ll consider them.

Oh and tell your rez to suck it. I like the baby.

Love and kisses,
SMeyer (not really)

hey catherine hardwicke

i was just wondering if you would consider reading a series for me and maybe start making the movies. i know its probably a really kinda dumb thing to do but i really like this book and i thinkk you could do some amazing stuff with it! it is called the house of night series and the books are called marked betrayed chosen untamed hunted and tempted. and i was also wondering if you took these books and made them in to movies if i could play a part in them i have always wanted to be an actress and maybe even some charicters from the twilight saga movies i think taylor lautner would be good in it and same with nikki reed and ashley greene! so i was just wondering if you would at least consider it thanx so much i really do want you to read the book i think you would enjoy them thanx. please reply back!!

tasyna

Dear Tasyna,

What about US?!

Love,
Robert and Kristen

PS Catherine Hardwicke wasn’t available to answer this email as it conflicted with her pre-scheduled ribbon cutting ceremony at the Anaheim TGIFridays. She sends her regards. We think.

I have this question for Kristen. Where did you go for acting classes? I have been thinking of starting up acting, but I don’t know where to start.

Peace,
Anna
92% of teens would be dead if Abercrombie and Fitch said breathing was uncool. If you are the  8% laughing, copy and paste this for your signature!!

Dear Anna,

Why the Kristen Stewart School of Acting, of course! I created my own method. It’s like breathing. You should try it.

Love,
Kristen

PS 92% of teens would be dead if Abercrombie and Fitch said breathing was uncool. If you are the  8% laughing, copy and paste this for your signature!!

Oh you crazies, you never fail to make our day… or at least make the 2 minutes it takes for us to read these missives of whackadoo. Please never stop and we’ll never stop NOT replying to you.

xoxo,
Moon

Who wants to volunteer to be our LTT intern to read all this mail? Should we make Rob the intern come over here and answer this mail as well? Are you one of “those fans?” And what about that Abercrombie line, are kids still wearing that stuff? I wore some of that in high school!

Our internet game is ridiculous: LTR, The Forum, Twitter, The Store

  • ThePlaneFriend

    Hahahahahaha–that’s all I have to say, cuz people are STUPID!

  • http://Twitter.com/Jayde17 Jayde

    These are hilarious!
    And SO what I needed after the shittiest 48 hours.
    Also, apologies on the total #LTTGirlFail
    Uni and work and prac have been kicking arse.
    Love yas!

    • http://mainericefamily.blogspot.com no cool name

      Here’s to a better next 48 hours!

  • superhumanmoron

    I cannot believe 92% of today’s youth don’t know how to use spell check.

    • Bea

      Or punctuation, evidently.

    • Janetrigs

      I can use spell check! But I generally prefer not to. I spell real #goo

      • snowwhitedriftd

        I type witfh my elbfows so typeos abound.

        • Midnight_Cyn

          I type with one eye, one hand, 1/2 brain and no spell chex! Oh and very much crazy…which is why I was quite worried when I 1st saw this topic :)

          • Stacey

            Don’t you dare call yourself crazy. From where I’m standing, I see a pretty terrific lady!

          • JodieO

            You listen to that Stacey! She knows what she’s talking about.

          • Midnight_Cyn

            Ok lets look at this: I missed my LTT friends MORE than I have ever missed my RL friends, I watch Twilight/New Moon at least once a day, I wrote a Thank You letter to Stephanie Meyer/cast (ok that doesn’t count b/c it brought me to LTT best day of my life, I sleep with an Edward blanket every night, am not embarrassed to wear any Twilight related clothing AND actually moved meeting SM to the 2nd highest spot on my bucket list…(the first spot had already been filled with getting together with all of you!) I AM certifiable! Case closed! :)

          • JodieO

            Sounds normal to me.

  • natashadushi

    Hahahahahahaah for the youtube Kristen Stewart School of Acting. I think that @janestrings can be a good intern for ltt

  • http://86rabbit.wordpress.com 86 Rabbit

    Missives of Wackadoo! Nice! If only I had the time to intern for you. This is the job I would volunteer for. If it’s a once a month gig count me in; I could really use the laugh!

    Britbrit, you made my day. I’m curious. How should SMeyer have handled it when Bella chooses Jacob, causing Jacob to imprint on her? Would Edward have been all tortured and “burning man” when he got back because a puppy was now Bella’s perfect man?

    Ooh! You’re a clever one! With Bella now gaga over Jacob there would be no baby. You almost got me. I’m sure you almost got SMeyer too. I am almost positive she was just thinking about rewriting everything.

    <3 One of Those Fans
    (Who reads one of those fansites when she gets the chance)

  • lieutenant.twilight

    Haha… What a GREAT way to start the day!

  • Midnight_Cyn

    “LTT Mailbag – The Crazies email us (again)”…Geez Moon you scared the shitz out of me…I was afraid to continue reading…so afraid I would see my name…. :)
    P.S. Hope you had a great vacation! (hugs)
    Morning all….

    • eatmyjorts

      Hey Cyn! My first thought was EXACTLY the same as yours…but I do love reading the crazy so maybe I’d just have to live with it…
      Hope your balance is returning…you’ll do anything, you Bella-alike you, to swoon in Eddie’s arms ;)

      • Midnight_Cyn

        ROFLMOWE…EMJ…I have reread your comment about 20 times today and only JUST NOW did it “click” and I got it!!! BTW your right. hugs…

    • TeamJacobEdward

      Too funny, Cyn. First thing that rolled through my head when I read the title was I started mentally going through any emails I’d ever sent to Moon and UC trying to remember what I’d said, if anything might have come off as “crazy” instead of funny.

      Okay back to bed for me. My head is throbbing (bad day for me, I hope its a good day for you Cyn), but I had to check LTT because I knew it would make me feel a little better. And it did, after I confirmed I haven’t been officially dubbed one of the crazies (yet anyway).

  • http://twitter.com/kandnandb kandnandb

    “I think it would have be better if you had edward leave for a reason and bella went to jacob… they go off to college to get away from it all and then….. edward make an appearance… bella think she’s thinks she is seeing things and doesn’t think to much… but than she starts seeing him more and more… then……………… jacob and edward start battling for bella because she can no longer choose between them… ”

    Hmmm…that sounds familiar, Britbrit. Ever been to a website called Fanfiction.net?

  • chochang

    ♫ I like girls that wear Abercrombie and Fitch,
    I’d take her if I had one wish.. ♫

    lalala..

    • http://www.twitter.com/antisocialangel fangbanger

      But she’s been gone since that summer..
      Since that summer

  • sjaantje

    I love when you guys let us read the letters you receive. They never fail to make me laugh.
    A web video Oscar nod needs to be given to the person who made the “Kristen Stewart School of Acting” video. Funniest video I’ve seen in a long time.

  • babiesbrown

    Oh, you girls just kill. Yesterday was my anniversary and tomorrow is my birthday. Other than husband roses and a handwritten note from my 6 year old, this is the best present I’ve gotten yet.
    Why? Because there is nothing like waking up on a dreary ass day, thinking “Fu@!, it’s only Tuesday?!” and then seeing the Kristen Stewart school of acting. Again.
    God, it makes my day every time. So full of win.
    But, I was surprised Hardi wasn’t “available.” That series totes sounds like something she would be into! Especially with the return of Nikki Reed and Ash, and of course, she’d probably try to get Rob to come back, too. Maybe have NReed and Rob do a little audition on her bed to add to her collection? I can see it.

    • lindsaylee

      yesterday was my birthday! Heres to August Babies… and yes, it was only tuesday, tell me about it… wednesday is not much better with a six am hangover – enjoy tomorrow!

    • babiesbrown

      Clearly, I need more sleep. Today is Wednesday. Obvi. (But yesterday was my anniversary and tomorrow is my bday. I know that even if I don’t know what fraking day of the week it is.) Lol.

    • Stacey

      Happy Birthday to you both!

  • http://www.twitter.com/antisocialangel fangbanger

    Brit’s bits,

    Go look up fanfic. I’m sure there is one that goes in that direction… although I’m not sure why that’s a good idea.

    With love,

    Fang “92% of teens would be dead if Abercrombie and Fitch said breathing was uncool. If you are the 8% laughing, copy and paste this for your signature!!” Banger

    • Obava

      Obvi, the Cullens know breathing is uncool.

  • lindsaylee

    I cant stand A&F, i feel like im having a seizure everytime i walk by the store with all the music and “woods” cologne. How is it still in business? I havnt shopped there since middle school.

    Wish the Kstew video was available at work, im sure its hysterical.

    fangbanger – spot on

    • Midnight_Cyn

      Random FYI regarding A & F : Had to close one of their stores in NY for ewww….bed bugs…ewww!

    • superhumanmoron

      My kids call it the “stinky store” b/c of all the cologne pumping out the doors!

    • kitkat

      Yeah, I’m pretty sure they did decide that breathing is uncool. I certainly can’t breathe when I walk past one of their stores. Never been in, and most likely never will.

  • Erica

    Haha I think i can only say WOW…

    On the other hand, it would make my year to be a LTT intern to be able to read craziness like that.
    Corporate craziness gets old. I can’t imagine those emails ever would.

  • Erica

    Haha I think i can only say WOW…

    On the other hand, it would make my year to be a LTT intern to be able to read craziness like that.
    Corporate craziness gets old. I can’t imagine those emails ever would.

  • SarahG

    A&F FTW! Is that store really still popular with the youngins? Their quality and prices are ridiculous. I can find better, more “current” styles (and great prices) at Target.

    • 3hboyshouse

      Holla Target!

  • http://twigirlworld.blogspot.com/ twigirl_world

    1) VERY Thankful none of my emails got labeled into the ‘crazies’ or at least didn’t make it into this post.
    2) Whoever made the Kristen school of acting video is a genius!!! That is an EPIC win
    3) I volunteer to be an intern and read these letters, because I enjoy laughing my ass off and I think I could get a KStew Flat Butt if I read these letters!

  • Janetrigs

    I love crazy people.

    I also love how we are now all basing on A&F. Betcha Kellan wouldn’t bash them, regardless of the fact they he may or may not have ever modeled for them, or at least looks like one of those who did. Kellan enjoys himself some A&F, and especially those pics you see when you walk in the store.

    Dammit I have to work now.

    • Stacey

      I think Kellan was one of their naked models for their old AF magazine. Not that I had a copy of it that was passed around the dorm or anything. umm… *runs and hides in shame*

  • dionrenee

    The Kristen Stewart School of Acting Clip has to be one of my Top 10, that was effing hilarious….i think if Kristen saw that she would bwwaaaa hahahahah

    I love, love, love the crazies…..this is our youth..lol..I refuse to believe anyone over 25 is that loca…

  • Stacey

    This post is so full of win! The Kristen Stewart School of acting was lengendary. Also, do those kids (I’m only guessing here) even read the site before they send this stuff or just see Letters to Twilight and think it’s Summitt’s personal email site for the cast and crew?

    The Abercrombie & Fitch made me laugh, then reminded me about the bonfire I want to make to throw all my husband’s AF in. Honestly, he keeps saying that it wears them for yard work, but hey buddy you keep wearing them in public. And no, SG jr. I will not mend those hideous AF cargo shorts that are falling apart. I’ll just keep saying to myself, “WWAD, WWAD…” ( My new mantra, What Would Alice Do. Which has replaced WWMRD, What Would Molly Ringwald Do)

  • JodieO

    Dear Moon and UC,
    What’s the deal with Abercrombie and Fitch? Why do teenagers love it so? Do you think they play the music so loud as to addle teenagers’ brains into thinking $75 for a worn out t-shirt is a good deal? Maybe I’m just too old to understand.

    Love,
    KMart Shopper

    PS. I do enjoy A&F’s homoerotic advertising.

    • Midnight_Cyn

      Hey Jodie..haven’t you heard? “K-Mart sucks”…(just wish I could remember which movie that is from…lol)!
      Hope your having a great day!

      • JodieO

        KMart Sucks is from Rainman. I love that movie!

        But now I live in Maine, so fashion is not a requirement. $5 jeans for the win!

        • Midnight_Cyn

          At this point I haven’t shopped in a real store for almost 4 yrs..so a K Mart would look pretty damn good right now..and I agree, Maine has its own umm unique style! :)

    • Cam

      I, too, enjoy A & F’s homoerotic advertising.

      They should totally do a Twilight themed campaign to coincide with the release of Breaking Dawn. Sort of like that new, over the top, hot as Hale True Blood Rolling Stone cover — but less blood — and no need to put KStew in there.

      • roslynselene

        I saw the word ‘stone’ over ‘KStew’ and thought of Kristoner. ;)

  • snowwhitedriftd

    *works near Anaheim TGIFridays, pops over to buy Cathi a cougarita.*

    Sadly, she wasn’t there. She got confused and ended up next door at Hooters. Look for the jortspack to appear in orange shortie shorts in the Twilight, the remake.

    • Stacey

      I can see Cathi hanging at Hooters. Well any place with a bar and a bunch of young men hanging around. Always looking for new “audition tapes”, that silly cougar.

  • Robsessedgirl

    HAHAH I LOVE CRAZIES. I needed that this morning.

    Love92% of teens would be dead if Abercrombie and Fitch said breathing was uncool. If you are the 8% laughing, copy and paste this for your signature!! Me & Kellan in his white Twilight outfit(totes A&F)

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  • http://www.twitter.com/hippietrixi hippietrixi

    What are these people smoking? Whatever it is I want some! And whatever you crazies are smoking don’t stop because I love me some good entertainment.

  • Lovespelledbackwards

    Moon, you and your crazies always make me smile. Welcome home!

  • http://dailytwimes.blogspot.com Cat

    Honestly, if you guys dedicated a site JUST to these letters, I’d read them every day (and reply if you wanted). baha!

  • LissyLoo

    Thanks for the laugh Moon!
    Anyway if u’re seriously after an intern… Pick me!! I’d do anything to help (even organise ur inbox!) if it means u keep up the posts. (do I get the feeling ur getting sick of ltr/ltt?) please don’t stop!! Anyway thanks for the laughs as always!
    Xox

  • theC

    The video was…..”huh”….. larious!

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