Twilight Buzz

Continuing with Moon’s idea of “mini” letters on Monday, today we’re going to discuss the latest Twilight “buzz” with a few little letters of my own:

Dear Cathy Hardi,

Wait, something about your new movie sounds familiar

What could it be? There’s:

Catherine Hardwicke
Billy Burke
A Wolf
Girl torn between two men
Familiar looking woods
Familiar looking mountains
An Actress from a Summit film

Is “All of the above” an answer? Man- you really like what you like & stick with it, huh?

And did you seriously use your interview about a totally unrelated movie to say

“Shiloh was my runner-up for Edward in “Twilight” but he and Kristen [Stewart] didn’t have the instant chemistry lock that is now well-known.”

Ohhh Cathy- give it a rest! We know- YOU are the reason for the magicness. It was probably in front of YOUR fireplace that they first made love on the bear skin. It was on YOUR video camera that their connection was first noticed and you watch it every night before you go to bed because it’s “Groovy.” We know. And until you release that video with the proof of the “magicness” no one cares…

In other news, I’ll probably see this movie. If not in the theaters, definitely when it’s on that free movie channel On Demand.

Dear Charlie,

It has come to our attention that tomorrow is “Have sex with a guy with a mustache” day. It’s for Cancer. It would be horrible if it didn’t happen. And you see…… you’re the only one I know with a mustache right now. So I’m just putting it out there- I’m willing. For cancer, and all. And since tomorrow is the official “Have sex with a guy with a mustache day,” I can bet there are tons of others who feel the same way.

Born-again virgin no more! Get out that little comb & make it happen. There are plenty of gals who wouldn’t mind a mustache ride. For cancer, of course.

More, after the jump!

Dear Kellan Lutz,

I’ve been racking my brain since yesterday trying to figure out why in the world you

  1. Shacked up with Anna-Lynn McCord again
  2. Felt you had to hide it (She IS your ex-girlfriend after all. Break-up sex is allowed)
  3. and you chose to hide in a Carlton Motor Lodge in Studio City, CA!

At first I thought- well, maybe you’re broke. Perhaps your Twilight gig doesn’t pay so well & you have expensive taste in work-out pants & v-neck t-shirtt, so maybe the $75/night charge is all you can manage. Or maybe it’s that they offer a $50 upgrade for a room with a private jacuzzi. You don’t get that at the Best Western these days. Was the tub in the shape of a champagne glass like in the Poconos?

I’ll never understand why you went for the cheap, but speaking of cheap- Why Anna-Lynn? Didn’t you get your church on & repent from your dirty ways recently? I thought things were over between you two? Were you getting together to try to convert her? Did she want inside scoop on the Breaking Dawn script & you couldn’t risk telling her at your home in case Summit bugged it, fearing you’d let the secrets slip?

Ooorrrr maybe I’m thinking about this the wrong way. I’ve been assuming all along that Anna-Lynne went into a fugly wig store to disguise herself, but maybe it was someone else disguised as Anna-Lynn??

Hmmmm, who could it be?

We can definitely assume it’s not Jumping Rob, despite his being EVERYWHERE lately- plus he was seeing fleeing from the scene. He’s seen the pictures of Anna-Lynne eating a banana & he’s scared.

Could our dreams be coming true & it’s our very own Ashley Greene? Is there a Kelshley in the works? You snooze you lose, Jackson!

What if it’s Taylor Swift- you heard her latest album- girl gets around. Plus she needs to be broken up with for “religious reasons” so she can write her next hit ballad and find success at Country, Pop and Christian radio. It would explain the sneaking around- they don’t want Tay Lautner to find out.

Or noooooo what if it’s Miss Stephenie Meyer? She hasn’t been seen since they returned from Brasil, has she? Of course, nothing shady was going on- they were just having a Bible Study.

So, what’s the deal, Kellan? Why the motor lodge? Do they have the best snacks in the vending machine? And was that really Anna-Lynne? If so, have you been repenting a ton this week?

So much Twilight buzz…. (so very little of it actually about Twilight.. shhhh)
Love,
UnintendedChoice

Did you miss yesterdays promo-post about our favorite “Bite Me Edward” notepads that are 50% off now through November 30th? Check out the banner in the sidebar, or hop on over to yesterday’s letter for the details!

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  • GeminiGypsy

    The new Red Riding Hood movie by Cathy Hardwicke is totally a take on Twilight with some Vampire Diaries mixed in there :P Although I am a fan of Amanda Seyfried- so she deserves another movie, but this movie looks a leeeetttle cheesy

  • TeamJacobEdward

    “Have sex with a guy with a mustache” day“

    “Who wants a mustache ride?”
    “I do! I do!”

    (I mean, it’s for a good cause and all.) ;)

    • TeamJacobEdward

      I don’t know why, but I feel oddly compelled to explain my reply about mustaches was a quote from the movie Super Troopers.

      I haven’t been down thumbed (yet anyway) but I feel misunderstood. Way that’s just the sort of my life hahaha

      • MidnightCougar

        I understood you luv, & I hear there are definite benefits to a mustache in the bedroom! ;)

        • TeamJacobEdward

          Well, of course, there’s that too…. :)

          • Stacey

            TJE, Did you see what I put up today…

  • http://mainericefamily.blogspot.com no cool name

    You know, I’ve gotten so used to you guys making up hilarious and untrue stuff that I was actually surprised when I clicked on the link to discover that it’s TRUE about Kellan and the $75/night motel and the $50 jacuzzi upgrade.

    Also, love the photoshopped Stephenie Meyer. But really, why would she go for Kellan when she has Nacho? (Being serious here – we all saw him on the red carpet at the Eclipse premiere – niiiiice.)

    • MidnightCougar

      Chapter 14 was fantastic! Chapter 15?? :)

      • TeamSeth

        ZOMG! 14 is up! Wait did I read that already? Hm…

      • Stacey

        Isn’t it great!!!!

        • MidnightCougar

          She is amazing! Such a captivating story, & of course I am very partial to the 19C plot, LOVE IT!! 18C & 19C Literature were two of my favorite University Courses. I’m actually going to start your “Forks” tomorrow. I’m looking forward to it! :)

  • Stacey

    If our boy Kellan did just repledge his love to Jesus, maybe that little harlot Annelynne tricked him to the motor lodge. (Didn’t Summit give him a ‘little’ raise with Ashley? He could have at least sprung for he Holiday Inn Express.)

    Plus, I’ve seen 90210 new edition, well before they kicked off Jenni Garth (Have to support the PFach family) and I think Annelynne might be a very good and unfortunately dressed harlot. (Have you seen her outfits on that show? My high school had a dress code and her ensembles would get her serious detention) Poor Kellan he couldn’t resist…

    And…you know Cath had the little girl from Big Love and Runner-up Edward ‘perform’ on her camcorder. Probably the same Twilight scene on the bed. I have a sneaky feeling she a whole lot of VHS’s of that scene w/ different actor combinations hidden in her closet.

    • kitkat

      “I have a sneaky feeling she a whole lot of VHS’s of that scene w/ different actor combinations hidden in her closet.”

      EWWWWW! Thanks for the creep out moment of the day…

    • The Old One

      Somehow I like how Cathy Hardie is unapologetic in her creeptasticness. I mean, she just goes for it, you know? If you made one or more fantastic audition tapes with various hot young actors, wouldn’t you keep your own little library and view it over and over? I’m pretty sure I would.

    • TeamSeth

      Didn’t Summit give him a ‘little’ raise with Ashley? I thought they dropped that plea?

      Also, at the end part of your post, were you making a Coupling reference?!

      • Stacey

        Coupling reference? But of course! I wish they still played it on BBC America!

        • TeamSeth

          Me too! Though, i think it jumped the shark when they swapped actors for the Joey-like character.

          • Stacey

            I agree! What was that guy’s name? Oliver? ugh…Then the last episode, in attempt to correct things…

  • kandnandb

    OMG, just the pictures of the sunglasses made me spit my breakfast across the screen. (Cherry Coke Zero, BTW. You should try it, Rob-it’s better than Coke Zero. Bc it tastes like cherries. And you could probably use some fruit in your diet. j/s)

    And who else would you have sex w/ on Have sex w/ a guy w/ a mustache day besides Charlie Swan? He’s a famous ladies’ man…..he knows how to give a good mustache ride.

    • TeamSeth

      Eternal bachelor — my kinda guy.

      I do wonder, diet cherry coke for breakfast? Nutritious and delicious?

      • kandnandb

        Why yes, nutrious and delicious. Much like I imagine Rob to taste. ;-)

      • http://sweetinator88.wordpress.com sweetinator88

        btw teamseth, i LOVE your icon/avatar picture thingy…

        • TeamSeth

          Thanks! It’s all about Team Curmudgeon!

  • Robsessedgirl

    I watched the Red Riding Hood trailer yesterday and I feel like it’s Twilight, but the sexytime version that includes my love Gary Oldman. I love that man. Oh Kellan….what have you gotten yourself into? That girl is….well just..ew. I don’t love you like I love Rob and Jackson but I care about you and think you should find a girlfriend somewhere else besides the dollar store. Maybe you and Taylor could work. You never know. I’ll take a moustache ride. HOLLA CHARLIE.,

  • Bea

    So, my husband decided to grow a mustache this week, much to my horror. Keep in mind that his genetics are such that not even his father, thirty years of hairy-ness ahead of him, can manage to grow proper facial hair. But ever year as winter approaches he feels the need to try. And this year, because he’s currently obsessed with “The Good Guys”, he decided to make it a mustache (also, probably, because deep down he knows the beard is an impossibility).
    He’s going to be way too excited about November 18. Do I tell him? Maybe I should wait ’till the 19th…

    • TeamSeth

      The sooner he knows, the sooner he’ll shave…

  • http://mainericefamily.blogspot.com no cool name

    Hey, what happened to following Jumping Rob for more are the cut?

    • http://mainericefamily.blogspot.com no cool name

      AFTER the cut, I mean…

    • http://mainericefamily.blogspot.com no cool name

      Oh wait – I see he’s over at LTR.

      • MidnightCougar

        Yes, we’re keeping Sexy Jumping Rob all to ourselves. lol

  • efam

    I heart the photoshop pics!! It just shows that silly disguises don’t work.

    Maybe she’ll let me borrow the wig to go see “Little Red Riding Hood”. I’m kind of intrigued, but embarrassed at the same time.

    • efam

      Actually, Anna-Lynn should take a few wig lessons from Kim of the Atlanta Housewives…

      I just moved to a different area of Atlanta and found out that she lives down the street from me. Scary!!

      • Bea

        Efam, admitting to living in Atlanta just made you my go-see-Breaking-Dawn buddy! Assuming we haven’t moved by then.

        • TeamSeth

          I thought you were going with the cast of Vampire Diaries?

          • Stacey

            I’d want to go with Somerhal…umm…I mean the cast. Can’t…umm..leave Degrassi out…

          • http://www.talksupe.wordpress.com snowwhitedrifted

            *volunteering to sit on Alaric’s lap for the viewing*

        • efam

          Yes!! Where do you live? I’m in Johns Creek (OTP, North of Atl). I always read LTT and LTR, but only occasionally post.

          Do you know the Vampire Diaries cast?? My friend let them film on her property last season…not sure if they have been there since. She promised to let me know when they do it again…she’s on a first name basis with Ian. :)

          • Bea

            I’m west of midtown, so a trek from you, but closer than LA. And I hate to disappoint, but I’ve never even seen VD… Team Seth must be thinking of someone else.

          • efam

            No disappointment here!! I don’t watch the show. There is an internet rumor that Ian (from VD) has been cast on the so-called “The Host” movie.

            We could always meet in the middle. I can shoot straight down 141 and be at Lenox in less than 30 minutes. We can coordinate when the time is closer (and if you are still living here).

          • Bea

            Done. Breaking Dawn in Buckhead a year from now. Maybe that theatre where they’ll bring you dinner and cocktails at your seat…

          • TeamSeth

            @Bea, it was just wishful thinking…

          • http://www.talksupe.wordpress.com snowwhitedrifted

            @efam
            Umm, does @stacey know this? “She promised to let me know when they do it again…she’s on a first name basis with Ian.”
            …cause there may be bribes. ;)

          • Stacey

            Who knows Mr. Ian Somerhalder?!?! I met him once, but I wouldn’t mind meeting him again. :0)

          • efam

            It’s my friend. She lives out in Covington where they film VD. Last spring, they filmed out on her plantation (wow…that sounds soooo southern) several times. She’s currently 34 weeks pregnant with twins, so she’s kind of preoccupied at the moment.
            Stacey, do you live in Atlanta?

          • Stacey

            Connecticut. But I met him in Maryland a long time ago. I was in college, so now I’m married w/two little ones. Yep…a long time ago.

  • Janetrigs

    I SUMMER IN THE POCONOS!!

    • The Old One

      Can we get a pic of you in the champagne glass?

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  • Goodgirlgoneplaid

    ZOMG. *clutches hands Aro stylee* I just clicked on that Poconos link. Please tell me it’s one of yours UC?? I never knew things like that actually existed in real life, just in Beyonce videos and fanfic (palatial pad), simply amazeballz.

    Oh yes, gotta big up Movember! Mr. Plaid is going for it and currently looking like a creeper version of his Dad. WRONGNESS!

    • http://twitter.com/minuit_passe minuit_passe

      You made me click on the link. I was relieved to see there is the fireplace, now all they have to do is figure out how to make the bear skin float on that heart-shaped jacuzzi/pool/whatevs and we’re in our element.

      • GoodgirlgonePlaid

        *muah* MP!!
        EVERYONE needs to click that link and get some magicness in their lives.

        • Bea

          True amazingness. Because nothing says “Egyptian themed” like a 7-foot champagne glass jacuzzi tub and a heard shaped pool.

        • The Old One

          So magic! But being more practical than magic myself, I’m wondering how the heck you get into that champagne glass?

          • Bea

            I was wondering that too. But then I read that it’s a four-story suite, so I’m guessing you get in upstairs.

          • TeamSeth

            I’m actually more concerned about getting out of it! I mean, you’ll be wet, woozy from the heat and chemicals, pruned, and likely drunk… that looks like a loooong way to slip and fall, and roll into the fire! There is that long, thick pole there though, maybe you’re supposed to slide down it?

  • http://mainericefamily.blogspot.com no cool name

    Husband and I have been trying to decide what to do for our upcoming 10-year anniversary – THE POCONOS IT IS! We just took a look at the Champagne Towers suite and at at $425/night, my husband proclaimed it a bargain and signed us up for a three-night stay. Can’t wait.

    (In case you are wondering, I am KIDDING.)

    • TeamSeth

      Yeah, I’d definitely prefer to drop $425/night there than in Chateau Frontenac in Quebec City any day!

      • http://mainericefamily.blogspot.com no cool name

        Seriously! Who wants that old world-style elegance and charm crap when you can have a bubble bath in a plexiglass champagne glass? Awesome!

        • http://www.talksupe.wordpress.com snowwhitedrifted

          Maybe if it was a plexiglass shoe tub I’d be interested, but a $425 champagne glass. Nah

  • http://woventale.wordpress.com operarose

    Thank you, Twilight gods, for giving us this bountiful harvest of hilariousness…

    I mean, you can’t make this stuff up:

    Cathy Hardy makes virtual clone of Twilight as her next film?

    Kellan, Mr. Hot CK Youth Group Bible and Charity hooks up in a budget hotel?

    Rob gets auctioned off with 2 day hotel stay?

    Robsten Swimming in Brasil in underwear?

    Thank goodness we have you all to help us digest this goodness. Between all of this and the engagement of William and Kate and the release of Harry Potter 7, I don’t know how I am going to be able to survive all of the awesomeness that is happening this week…

    • http://woventale.wordpress.com operarose

      And by “you all” I untactfully meant UC, Moon, and my fair LTT commenting friends.

      See? Not even coherent anymore.

    • http://mainericefamily.blogspot.com no cool name

      I know!! And I don’t even care if this makes me lame, but as I LOVE a good wedding (ask TeamSeth), I sort of can’t wait for Will and Kate’s big day.

      • Luludee

        They are a really cute couple. I saw part of an interview with them last night and I think that he seems to have a good head on his shoulders.
        However, I think it’s incredibly tacky of the press to start comparing her in every way, to Princess Diana.

      • http://woventale.wordpress.com operarose

        I think they’re very sweet and smart! And I agree, totally unfair for her to be compared to Diana. It’s inevitable, of course. But Kate can be her own person, I am sure she’s bound to be a marvelous representative for the royal family.

    • TeamSeth

      I seriously thought they were engaged like 3 years ago or more! I remember seeing the Us Weekly at the College Park Publix–which I’ve not been to in at least 3 years!

      (and SQUEE for HP7! Got my tickets already! Me and my Mr. Mustache are going on a dinner and movie date! woot woot)

      • Tigerkitten36

        College park Publix?

        Teamseth are you in Florida?

        • TeamSeth

          I was, but then I moved to Portland, OR

    • Luludee

      I have to wait until next week to see Harry Potter. :(

      BUT, I think the plan is to go see it at an IMAX, which will rock!!

  • kitkat

    I see what you mean by the familiar mountains. They looked just like the Twi ones, but with more snow.

    On an unrelated (but Twi-related) note- Even in the Louvre it is possible to think of Twilight. Hello, paintings of Volterra!

    • TeamSeth

      I <3 you.

      And the Mona Lisa is doing the Bella smile…

    • ladyofthemeadow

      Did you catch the discussion of Twilight last night on The Middle? Sue got her dad to sit down with her and watch Twilight and her plot summary was right one! It was a little thrill for me anyway. And proof you can’t go anywhere without running into something Twilight.

      • efam

        I totally saw it!! I even did a little clap at the end…my husband just looked at me funny.

  • gizmo

    Actually, I’m really excited about Red Riding Hood and couldn’t care less about BD. It’s Twi cheese all over again. And that’s the only way I like it. Somehow, I always go back to Cathy’s Twi. Cougarita rules.

    • Ambella

      I am excited about the “Red Riding hood’ too….I have come to terms with the fact that I like cheese. What’s more fun than having two hot guys fight over you while your on your way to grandma’s house in your volturi robe?

  • Dweezil

    Ewww Pocconos. Something about staying at a place that is intended solely for shagging is beyond icky. Do they treat the pools with an antibiotic pool shock? And thank you for dressing this Kellan/Annalyn Wig gate-I knew you wouldn’t let us down!

    • Brooke Lockart

      Thumbs down for not loving the Poconos. It’s the place to be. Tweed seriously.

  • frightenedflips

    First thing I thought was, is this movie going to spawn a LTRRH ????? We all thought Twilight was cheesy and look at us now.
    I’m kinda excited – Squeeeee eeeee!!!!!!!
    But goodness gracious that cape is loooonngg!!!!!! Very unpractical. And looks like a nod to the “sex hair” – kept thinking it was rob in the backround.

    • TeamSeth

      Very long cape. Visually stunning against the snowy peaks though. That shot reminded me of a certain High Pass of the Misty Mountains in LOTR… I half expect Viggo to make an appearance in his stately ranger form. Maybe a sword fight with Burke, which then turns into hand to hand combat, that becomes wrestling, that becomes… oh my, I think I’ve just started a fanfic!

      • The Old One

        I like the way you think.

      • http://www.talksupe.wordpress.com snowwhitedrifted

        kudos to you for bringing a Viggo/Burke swordfight to mind! :)

  • TeamSeth

    Oldman and Burke in the same film? Who’s afraid–not me.

    • TeamSeth

      Oldman and Burke hater?! :'(

      • Luludee

        I think that may have been me, but it was an accident!! My eyes were focused elsewhere as I went to click the thumbs in my peripheral vision.

        But I will say that Oldman looked very bad and not in a good way, in The Book of Eli. I prefer to picture him as Serius Black and/or Dracula. ;)

        AND I just remembered that I saw a preview for another movie that Burke is going to be in, also from Summit, when I went to see Red, but sadly, he was sans mustache :(

        • http://www.talksupe.wordpress.com snowwhitedrifted

          Stacey said the same thing about the Oldman not looking his best in “Eli”.

          Love Dracula Oldman!!!! Awe, my first vampire crush.

          • Stacey

            The dude scared me in it. He was a BAD guy. Poor Denzel Washington!

  • Tiffany

    I cant stand chick in all those summit movies.. i cant even remember her name, amanda something or another… anyways i think she is a HORRIBLE actress the only thing she has ever been good in is Mean Girls

    • Ambella

      Her name is Amanda thathasmoremoneythanmeandbetterhairandisreallyskinny or something like that

      • TeamSeth

        I always think of it as Amanda Sigmund Freud.

        • Ambella

          lol……O man….I will never be able to hear her name again without thinking about that.

          sidenote….am I the only person that thinks she looks exactly like an older “Dakota Fanning”? Dakota needs to shank her or something so they look different.

          • TeamSeth

            nah, Sig’s face is rounder… she has like a circle face and fanning has more of a heart shape.

  • JustGoWithIt

    Who would it hurt to release the Twilight audition tape, really? They could add it as an extra feature on a special edition Twilight DVD. I would buy it.
    Side note: I admitted my love for Rob at work today (after being asked about celebrity crushes, not out of the blue like a Twi-crazy), but only about half the people there even really knew who he was. They didn’t realize that it isn’t so much the crush that is embarrassing, because he’s not THAT young, and almost everybody is crushing on him to some extent right now. The embarrassment comes when the extent of the crush inevitably comes out a little. Like then I turn bright red and start sweating, and everyone is oh, you don’t just have a crush on him, you looooooovvvve him!

    • http://mainericefamily.blogspot.com no cool name

      “you loooooooovvvve him!”

      hahahahahaha!!!!!!!!!!!!!

    • robsfuturemate

      Summit’s all about making more cash. I wouldn’t put it past them to sell it as it’s own DVD special! I mean, there is that Robsessed video and Rob’s technically not even in it!! (Okay, my bro-in-law gave it to me as a gift. I HAD to watch it!)

    • kitkat

      It’ll be on the extra super duper special edition that they release in ten years, like they’re doing now with HP. :)

  • MidnightCougar

    Moon that video is hilarious. Eventhough, I know your post is meant to be humorous, which it definitely is, I’m also touched by the mention of the prostate cancer part b/c one of my dearest friends battled prostate cancer for 4 yrs, & now that he is cancer-free, he has become a strong advocate for Prostate Cancer & has also written an amazing book about his experience. It is an awful disease, & I am honored to be helping him Market & Promote his book. Thanks for mentioning it’s Prostate Cancer Awareness Month. It’s wonderful when you & UC can use the power of your internet-sites to promote and support worthwhile causes. You gals are truly one of a kind.

    Thanks: MC :)

  • http://www.talksupe.wordpress.com snowwhitedrifted

    Ohhh, I think the LRR film looks good! Yay more wolves and legends.

    • Stacey

      Me too!!!!

      Oh Newsweek this week mentioned Twilight in regards to the Harry Potter movie.

      The writer called the Twilight movies a giddy, guilty pleasure. It made me think of Cath and that the Newsweek guy might be a big fan of spidermonkeys.

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