A Unicorn Strikes again
In case you forgot:
Unicorn: A rare mystical creature only rumored to exist but highly sought after. Like a a guy who likes Twilight.
It’s been so long since we’ve heard from one that I almost forgot they existed. Until….. we got this email:
First of all, congrats on your life altering hangout session with Steph. I would have vomited as many times as Stephenie addressed me had I been there.
I decided to check out your website after seeing that you guys were picked to be thrown blindfolded in a van to meet the vampire mother.
I have to say that I am troubled to find out from your letters that I am alone in this world. I am a man. Married with 2 kids and one on the way. Surely it cannot be a rare thing that someone like me absolutely breathes and lives Twilight in his life. Are you saying that I will likely never encounter another male twihard in my life. Sure, I’ve never met one but I always thought it was because I just don’t have many guy friends to begin with. I have never been ashamed of Twilight and although in the deepest part of my subconscious I realize the book was made for middle school screaming tweens, I have never felt ashamed for loving a universe I dream of being real. Your letters, however are a forbidden fruit that has unlocked the knowledge of good and evil. I never noticed all the females surrounding me in the garden. I never noticed that I am the only guy there! And even though everyone else is properly dressed with their team Jacob and Edward shirts and jorts, I am the only one naked.
Little do you know that my heart stands strong for Edward and Jacob, and little will dismay my pride in their story. I may not feel for RPatt and TLaut the way a hormonal teen girl exudes, but my devotion will remain. I will continue buying my TwiPhone covers, and TwiDolls. I will unwearyingly buy my daily theater ticket for one. I will purchase all the Twilight movie guides and read the special Twilight edition People at the front of the bus. And I will stand proud in line to get the first BD tickets as the sun’s rays rise to light up my shimmer glitter on my face. I will continue to cry out in one voice with all my sisters for Midnight Sun.
Even if I am the only straight male twitard on the planet, I will embrace all of you as my own family. The question is will you accept me as the only brother?
¿El Único? (the only one?)
I immediately emailed ¿El Único? back to WELCOME HIM TO THE LTT FAMILY!
Read more from the newest sighting of the rare Mythical Unicorn after the jump!
In true LTT style, I had to learn more so I asked him a few questions & was thrilled with his responses:
How did you lose your virginity? (Uh, Twilight virginity, of course)
I got into Twilight about three years ago as I was looking for a good wholesome book for my niece’s 13th birthday. I heard about Twilight but being a good uncle I did not want to give her something smutty so I decided to read Twilight to make sure it was appropriate for her. I checked out the book and didn’t even read it cause I kept putting it off. Then one day as I was at the bookstore I picked up the copy and read the back and read Stephenie’s famous “Three things I was sure of” lines and was instantly captured by the premise. I went back to the library and they no longer had any copies available. I had to wait 4 weeks before I could check it out again the whole time regreting not having at least read the back when I had the book. I think those 4 weeks helped to fuel the twihardness I developed as i really looked forward to reading it and was forever trapped in the story once I read it. I remember seeing another guy at my job reading the series during his lunch breaks and thinking this is okay material for me to read I guess. I didn’t discover it was a YA novel until halfway through the series.
Do you know any other Unicorns?
About a year ago, I went on an internet quest to find a simple book club to discuss Twilight. And that was not difficult to do by any means. I went through all the sign up processes and pretty soon I was bloggin away and several websites with questions and answers. Things changed when I noticed that no one was responding to anything I said when I asked questions or when I made commetns. Well, no biggie since I wasn’t out to get attention but I started to feel like I was being ignored. It dawned on me that as I always stated my age (31) and sex (male) on all my posts and the fact that perhaps I spoke with the vivacity and enthusiasm of a common twiteen that perhaps I just miiiiight be a tad bit creapy to those that don’t know me. I was devastated at this realization and felt cast away from expressing what I really wanted. So I decided to send notes to all the twilight fansites describing my dilemna with the hope that maybe there are other Twimen. I KNOW there are others since I talk to them here and there, but no one seems to be as loud and proud as I am in life about it, on the interwebs (“thattwillightguy” is an exception, although he’s not old like me).
Since a year ago, I have received “0” responses. I took this as, “dude, you are pretty creapy so like we’re gonna go eat at that lunch table on the other side”. I continued day to day disheartened by the lack of responses, still reading blogs and participating in whatever Twilight events happened. So when I checked my email today I must be excused for screaming a little bit in my office! Thank you for answering my cries! Well, not that I cry or anything cause I am after all pretty manly just so that can be clear and overstated.
What do people think when they find out you are a Unicorn?
Strangely, I have never had an akwkard moment from another guy. If anything they are always interested to hear my review. The weird looks always come from women (and even teenage girls) who have not read Twilight yet. It takes a while for me to explain that it is not merely a girly novel but a really interesting and captivating story for any audience. My best conversations about twilight have been with outher guys. In a wedding reception my brother-in-law and I were discussing the storyline of Twilight since he likes the story too and 3 hours later after the party was winding down and the music softened I heard my sister cry out to my wife, “OMG, they’ve been talking about Twilight the whole time! I thought they were talking about cars!”
Who is your favorite Twilight female character?
I’d have to say that my favorite Twilight girl is Renesmee. Partly because I just had a beautiful baby girl and I find Renesmee incredibly interesting. I really hope Stephanie decides to write more on her life as she grows. I have millions of stories in my head about Jacob and Renesmee encountering new adventures. I wish the woman would write more! I believe Mackenzie will do a wonderful job. I am more concerned about the CG involved in making her look believably young AND realistic. Since she is one of my favorite characters, I don’t want the movie to ruin her for me. I think it’s smart to pick an older actress not just because of the maturity of the character but also just in case Stephenie decides to continue the story and we are in need of an expanded movie franchise and then we’ll already have a fully grown Mackenzie to fall in the roll. Just wishful hoping.
Is your wife a Twihard?
As for my wife she loved it until I got in too deep, then she got sick of it. Somewhere along the line she got tired of hearing me scream about the new leaked photos of feathers! Her abysmal looks tell me all I need to know. She may not like the level I might have taken it but at least she is supportive of me. Eventhough she may not let me get that Edward cut out for our room I don’t let it get me down. I just change the desktop wallpaper to Jacob’s shirtless body to her annoyance. I actually enjoy watching my wife roll her eyes when I tell her about how I can’t decide if Jacob (T-Laut) or Edward (R-Patt) is dreamier.
Tell us more about yourself. You KNOW we’re all wondering!:
I love YA adult stories basically because they are not as smutty and vulgar as many adult novels, but I also really don’t think I am that much different from other guys. I have similar tastes in cars and movies as most guys but I also enjoy romantic stories. My wife compliments me by laughing at romantic moments and loving horror blood and gore.
I am definately not your typically looking Twihard. I kind of resemble a Latin gangbanger from Hawaii with a Spanish accent but I am more of a nerdy happy-go-lucky swedish white boy named Sven that likes techno on the inside. I am currently in graphic design in the publishing industry and love to write and draw. I hope to one day become a writer and illustrator myself, but first I need to learn to stop using spell check before I get anywhere on that.
And there you have it!!!! Our newest Unicorn ¿El Único? who resembles a “Latin gangbanger from Hawaii with a Spanish accent” but is more of a “nerdy happy-go-lucky swedish white boy named Sven that likes techno on the inside” (best.thing.ever)
BIENVENDIOS A LA FAMILIA, ¿El Único?
What do you think of our latest Unicorn? I, for one, still can’t get over that there are ANY guys out there who like this stuff & I know a few these days! Have any fun stories about guys & Twilight lately?