THE wedding dress
Dear Bella Swan-Cullen (you are hyphening your name like a modern woman, right?),
BIG NEWS! Reelz Channel released the exclusive news that Caroline Herrera designed your wedding dress and there is much speculation that we’re going to be seeing a preview ANY day (Can I just throw it out there that I wouldn’t mind waiting until I’m IN the theater for the first time? Anyway, I digress…) Is there a point to discussing this? Your wedding dress? It’s not like it matters. It’s over & done with. It’s dry-cleaned and packed into a garment bag never to be worn again (until 50 years from now when you & Edward move somewhere new & decide to spice up your sexlife & roleplay your honeymoon again & get ALL into it by even recreating your wedding for your new friends who think it’s real) but apparently we’re going to experience the big “reveal” soon (knowing my luck it will be on the day (or hours before) I post this letter!)
But I haven’t talked about it much. Mostly because I’ve been preparing myself to be disappointed. But Bella, look, I’m already married. I already had my dream wedding dress (that’s the back! aw! I think I might take that bad boy out of the closet this weekend!) and so I have nothing to look forward to (except the sadness of not fitting into my dress) but YOURS (okay and my 2 unmarried sisters & friend getting married next week and scores of single friends but whatever) This is about YOU!
And I’ve been nervous. And mostly because well, your clothing has never thrilled me before. I mean this:
I get it. Washingington. Grunge. Hippie-Grunge Blah blah. But this isn’t 1992. Show off that cute little figure. Stop borrowing Charlie’s clothes
And you KNOW how we feel about the khaki skirt you wore to meet the Cullens for the first time (I tried to find a photoshopped image, I really did. But apparently the fandom (and by the fandom, I mean WE) hasn’t made one yet!)
So I’ve been nervous. REALLY nervous. I mean, the fan manips don’t give me much hope. There’s this one with the beautiful green backdrop:
And I know Stephenie wants you in something timeless & old fashioned, but I sure hope it’s less “little bo peep gets married” than this picture:
THIS dress has some potential! (Can you tell I like lace?)
And without picking up Breaking Dawn again because honestly I don’t know what happened to my copy and I’m kinda bummed about it because it was signed by Stephenie- Eek- I think Bella’s dress will have sleeves. I’m not anti-sleeves. Kate Middleton brought back sleeves. So I’m praying it resembles This
The cartoon version from the The Twilight Saga: The Official Illustrated Guide has potential. I mean, if you can look past the goth look. I LOVE the veil- I do wish the sleeves were a little more open though
You know what I realized while “researching” for this letter? There are FAR too few photo manips of Kristen Stewart in a wedding dress! Come on people!!! you had time to Photoshop THIS but couldn’t give me Kristen in a Badgley Mischka?
Without wasting an entire afternoon looking at wedding dresses (just approximately 1.5 hours), I’ve decided this is my favorite:
Add sleeves, a gorgeous veil and you have MY PERFECT Bella dress. Now I’ll wait patiently to see what Caroline Hererra did!
Waiting for my invitation,
Holllaaa: We’re giving away a copy of the Catherine Hardwicke-directed, hot boys love triangle, Amanda Seyfried starring Red Riding Hood DVD/Blue-Ray Combo Pack to a random winner to celebrate the release to DVD/Blue-Ray yesterday! To enter just visit: http://redridinghoodlovetriangle.com/ and make sure you leave a comment on this post from now until Friday. We’ll pick a random winner (Unfortunately it’s for the US only. I know, we’re the worst!)