Kellan’s gonna Punk us all!

You're about to get Punk'd

Dear Anyone who’s ever known Kellan,

Cast members
Friends
Family
Bible Study friends
Accountability Partners
Anna Lynne
The Wig Anna Lynne wore

This will serve as your warning, Kellan is going to be hosting an episode of Punk’d this season when they launch the reboot. Along with other celebs he will host an episode where he pulls a prank that supposed to be funny on SOMEONE… who that person(s) will be, we don’t know. So OF COURSE, I’ve come up with some scenarios…

Kellan bursts in on his weekly bible study in Hollywood as they’re studying a particularly tricky passage… “HAHA! You guys just got Punk’d! While everyone was giving one armed side hugs and trying out the casserole potluck I switched all the bible’s from NIV translation to King James! You’ve been studying from the least accurate translation of the bible!!! HAHAHAHA SUCKAHS!!!!” Kellan steals some leftovers and exits as everyone continues to look confused.

You just got... no wait, maybe I got Punk'd in this one

Kellan bursts in on his mom’s yearly mammogram appointment at the gynocologist’s office. “You just got Punk’d Mom!!!! HAHAHA!!! Remember when I asked to see your phone because I wanted to install my new Kellan Lutz app? Well guess what, there is no Kellan Luta app and instead I changed your appointment to today! You didn’t have to get your boob smashed for another six months! HAHAAHAHA! SUCKS TO BE YOU MOM!” Turns to camera “Ladies, don’t forget your yearly mammograms and monthly self exams” Demonstrates on himself and then exits while his mom stands shirtless next to the radiologist behind him.

Kellan jumps on stage after the 100 Monkeys finish an improvised song “We’re all gay for each other.” “HAHAHAHAHA YOU JUST GOT PUNK’D Jackson and Monkey dudes who’s names I don’t know! I was the dude who yelled “We’re all gay for each other” when you asked for audience suggestions for your improvised song. GOTCHA ALL!!! You just unknowingly came out on national television! HHAAHHAAH!” Kellan runs off stage laughing at Jackson and his guyliner. Too bad the joke’s on Kellan because the 100 Monkeys will go on to sell 38 copies of the song on iTunes. It was a reverse punking! On us all…

Kellan shows up to the Breaking Dawn Pt 1 tent city with dozens upon dozens of doughnuts for tired, hungry crazed Twifans sleeping in tents with his face on the side. As the fans attempt to grab his butt a doughnut Kellan throws the doughnuts on the ground and yells “YOU JUST GOT PUNK’D Twilight fans!!! HAHAHAHA I care too much about your health to let you eat these sugary, diabetes inducing, high fructose corn syrup bombs. Now go back to your tents!! HAHAHAA!” Kellan runs off to his limo but not without first picking up a half smashed doughnut from the ground then shoving it into his mouth before jumping into the backseat as Twihards stand, mouths agap, staring.

Little did you know Ashley... you just got Punk'd!

Kellan bursts into Ashley Green’s room as she’s changing, half naked she asks his opinion on an outfit. “Whatever shows the most T&A cause guess what you just got Punk’d Ashley! I’m actually not gay, I’m straight so all this time you’ve been thinking our cuddle sessions were totally platonic, they weren’t… and all the times I suggest we play Truth or Dare on game night and dared you to kiss me it’s because I totally like women not men! HAHAHAHAA! Now I’m off to the FEMALE strip club!” Cut back to Ashley half naked as she turns to the camera and mouths “I knew all along” HIT IT!

Yea, I pretty much imagine it to be something along these lines… only time will tell. So be vigilant and be on your toes friends and foes of Kellan! He’s on the Punk’d prowl.

If you see something, say something!
Themoonisdown

What will lil Kell bell do for his Punk’d episode? Anyone we missed?
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  • Anonymous

    Kellan on Punk’d? Bella’s Chastity Bedspread on clearance at Target? ROB’S ASS?!?! A STUPID FLOWER AS A DVD EXTRA?!?!?! There is…too much.  Where’s my fainting couch?

    • Anonymous

      I did get the bedspread, by the way.  It’ll fall to pieces upon washing, I’m sure, but in the meantime I really like it.  My husband keeps saying, “I’d like it more if I didn’t know it was from Twilight.”

      • Anonymous

        haha, I did too! It’ll be here next week. We…we *needed* a new bedspread…sort of. I mean, yeah. *blushes*

        • Anonymous

          We actually had been talking about a new bedset, but hadn’t found one we really liked.  I’m justifying the poor quality by telling myself that for $30 it’s a great stopgap… and being careful to keep it clean because I really want to keep it forever. I don’t think “Bella’s bedspread” when I look at it anymore, I just think, “I like that so much, and I got such a good deal!”  Best (ok, only) merch purchase ever.    

    • MariaCecilia

      How about a discount at the decorators who put all those flowers up instead? I sure could use a few flowers to cover the stains on my walls and ceiling…

      • Anonymous

        Ceiling? Stained? How?!

        • MariaCecilia

          Don’t ask me, ask the neigbours! The only ones I can account for are the blood stains from when hubby cut his finger in the kitchen and promptly sprayed a) the counters b) the walls c) the curtains d) the ceiling. (And it wasn’t even his birthday!)  A little blood goes a long way…

          • http://www.kstewartnews.com KStewBoy

            Look out!  Here comes Jasper!!!!

          • Anonymous

            haha! Jasper! It wasn’t his birthday! hee hee it’s like a Twilight inside joke night at the Twilight Joke Shack. hee.

          • Anonymous

            Is he a spray-painter?

          • MariaCecilia

            He is sure known as one now…

          • Anonymous

            What do the neigbours have to do with your kitchen ceiling?!

            Poor Mr. Cecilia :(

          • MariaCecilia

            Our ceiling is their floor… ;-)

          • Anonymous

            Wasn’t it also your husband who almost burned himself down with the Christmas tree? 

            Seriously, you could make a lotta money if you video him at all times.

          • MariaCecilia

            Brills! Gotta put video camera on the wish list for my birthday now!!

    • Anonymous

      Okaaay, curiosity wins: what’s with Rob’s ass?

      • MariaCecilia

        Go over to LTR and find out! (Only, then you have to go to Belgium to REALLY find out. Bummer.)

        • Anonymous

          Yeah, LTR sums up the madness quite nicely. Basically my Twitter melted for a while, and everyone was slightly uncomfortable with the group fap.

          I wonder if Rob was sitting in a Heineken-strewn apartment somewhere, woke up and thought, “I have the strangest feeling that a million people are talking about my ass right now…”

          • http://www.kstewartnews.com KStewBoy

            Yeah, I hate it when that happens.

        • Anonymous

          That’s it, i’m so not watching Bel Ami :$
          Not that have anything against butts shown on screen (ever seen Burlesque? You get a great full view of James’, i mean Cam’s!) no offense to anyone, it’s just…. Ron

          • MariaCecilia

            Where’s your family feeling? Of course we should all go out to support Ron’s butt!! BECAUSE it’s Ron’s!

          • Anonymous

            His bum needs support already? May I suggest Spanx?

  • http://www.kstewartnews.com KStewBoy

    Kellan tells his family that he is giving up his acting career to be a missionary in Kenya.  His family is so happy – they are beaming with pride as they hug each other and celebrate his faithful decision.
    Then as they all calm down he screams “PUNKED!!  I ain’t goin’ to no stinking AFRICA!!!”
    His family then breaks down crying as Ashton Kutcher comes running down the stairs laughing and starts chest bumping with a gleeful Kellan.

  • Anonymous

    “Wig Anna Lynne wore” “demonstrates on himself”  
    You’re in fine form this morning, Moon.
    It really should be Jackson that he punks.  That would be delightful.

  • ladyofthemeadow

    I’ve got my own version of Punk’d going on today. At the eye doctor this morning, they dilated my pupils. When I went in to work, my pupils were noticeably wide and black. I told people I’d be changed.

    No one believed me. What, no one is gullible these days?!

    • ladyofthemeadow

      I’d been changed, I meant.

    • Anonymous

      How do they dilate your pupils? How can it last that long?

      • MariaCecilia

        Ladies used to do it to themselves with valeriana drops in the old days, to make their eyes look huge, dark and mysterious. I guess it’s done with eyedrops today as well, it’s a kind of sedative, to “freeze” the pupils for a length of time for examinations or operations?

        • Anonymous

          Ladies in the old days were plain stupid. I mean, if you see someone you really like your pupils should naturally dilate, no? No need to drench your eyes with anything.

          Thanks for the information, anyway. I like learning this kinda stuff.

          • Anonymous

            We won’t mention the arsenic or lead-based face paint then either

          • Anonymous

            Okay, i did some googling: it KILLED people?! WTF!? I don’t know why i’m so surprised, really. It’s not like women don’t do it anymore… kill themselves to look pretty, i mean. Guess we’ll never learn. :(

          • Anonymous

            The price you pay to look fashionably pale. We could’ve told them you just need a love bite from the right “person”

          • Anonymous

            How to get your hands on the right “person”, now that’s the tricky part. Maybe not so tricky, just hang around Forks high school parking lot long enough and you should stumble upon one. Eventually.

          • Anonymous

            Maybe that was Bella’s secret weapon: she stumbledeverywhere. OK I’m getting a bit weak here. Enough computerfor one day :)

      • ladyofthemeadow

        They put drops in so your pupils dilate and the eye dr can have a good look in. It’s part of the standard eye exam here. It lasts a few hours and is only mildly uncomfortable.

        And it makes you look like a vamp after a good feed.

        • Anonymous

          I’m a bit concerned that your optician gives you dark red pupils…

    • MariaCecilia

      You should be grateful they didn’t run away screaming “A hungry vampire!! A hungry vampire!!”

  • MariaCecilia

    How about Kellan runs in when Taylor Lautner is at an audition, crying “Ha! You just got punk’d – you thought you were auditioning for the next Bourne movie, but I already GOT THE PART!!” Which is interrupted by Jeremy Brenner walking on set and smirking.”Actually, Kellan, I got the part, so you are BOTH punk’d!” Which is interrupted by a red-eyed Matt Damon running on set with a machine gun crying “NO ONE IS GONNA DO BOURNE BUT ME!!” and firing off random shots that has everyone ducking for cover..oh, this could go on forever..

    • MariaCecilia

      Sorry, Jeremy, it’s Renner, I know! And you’re gonna be awesome, I just know it! *wink wink*

  • Anonymous

    Anyone else notice that the dvd is being released on Tayor’s bday, or is that just me?

    • Anonymous

      No, It’s just you ;)

      • MariaCecilia

        I would have noticed if it was April 9 or May 13, or maybe the Ides of March, but there are limits to my memory… You’re still totally normal, however.

        • Anonymous

          Who’s Bday on April 9/ May 13? (Too lazy to look it up myself)
          Oh, for the good old days when i knew everyone’s wikipedia entries by heart… (sigh) good times :)

          • MariaCecilia

            KStew and RPattz, don’t you know? Oh, and it was Caesar was killed on the Ides of March. Won’t say who dunnit, though, go look it up. ;-)

          • http://www.kstewartnews.com KStewBoy

            I guess I’m the only one who formally celebrates “April 9th Day”

          • Anonymous

            My dad does. He’s not an 82yoa unicorn though – it was his and mum’s anniversary

          • Anonymous

            Oh you people…11th Feb? Come on!

          • northernlights

            I do as well – it’s my little brother’s birthday. 

            It is also the day Finns celebrate the Finnish language, so if you ever visit Finland, you’ll see flags everywhere.

          • MariaCecilia

            It was my dad’s birth day (RIP) so that’s why the date sort of stuck. But any reason to celebrate is a good reason!!

    • Anonymous

      Think it’s just you – not available til 12th March in the UK :-(

      • Bubs

        I read somewhere the 15th March in Australia-why does the US get it for Valentine’s Day and not the rest of the world ??? No wonder people download or buy hot copies. Scummit pay attention-your “market” is not amused !

        • Anonymous

          Struth yeah

        • Anonymous

          Dear Scummit,,,,, where to start…

    • Anonymous

      Thanks to everyone who acknowleged that while it is just me who has Feb. 11 on the brain, I am also normal. This why I heart LTT. :)

      • Anonymous

        Oh no, keep the faith kitkat, keep the faith.

  • Anonymous

    Kellan definitely got Punk’d in that picture :)

  • Mika

    Hey guys!! I love Jackson Rathbone and 100 Monkeys, and I know that a lot of other Twilight fans do too. I’m a member of a petition group on Facebook, a petition for Jackson’s band 100 Monkeys to be on The Twilight Saga: Breaking Dawn Part 2′s soundtrack. We’re trying to spread it as much as possible and we want more people to join the group so that we can get our voice heard. I’d be so grateful if you could help us spread it on the website! Here’s the link to the group:http://www.facebook.com/groups/176719175752647/ Thank you so much in advance! 

    • Anonymous

      Dear Mika, I in no way support the proposal for 100 Monkeys to be included on the TSBDPII soundtrack. However, if they happen to be touring Australia (specifically Melbourne, my local friendly uppity bar that mixes awesome drinks) I will be more than happy to put in an appearance, as long as it is happy hour, or any LTTer is guest bartender. XXX Thanking you in advance.

      • http://www.kstewartnews.com KStewBoy

        Ha! I love it!!

  • Anonymous

    Girls (and boy) i don’t know if you’ve been following TeamSeth’s book, if you haven’t you really should give it a go. Six chapters are out so far (new ones every Thursday). It’s awesome and FREE, so you should be ashamed of yourself if you can’t spare a few minutes of your time to support your creative fellow LTTer/friend. Here’s the link:http://eatyourserial.com/serial/on-the-cusp-of-the-earth/
    And now i will stop because i’m feeling more like your embarsingly proud mom by the second. READ IT.

    • http://www.kstewartnews.com KStewBoy

      Ok, Mom – like sheesh, stop nagging me already.. I’ll clean my roo….. er I’ll read TeamSeth’s book!

      Thanks for the link, Muchacho.

      • Anonymous

        You’re welcome.

        Don’t skip under your bed!

        Oh, and that would be Muchacha for me, not trying to be a Spanish wizz or anything, just… yeah.

      • Anonymous

        Dear TeamNoOne, am suitably ashamed, I have no excuse. In fact I admit I need to lift my game from twilight (yes, that is what she said, forgive me Stephenie) and start worshipping TS.

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