Zombie Hamlet is a real thing and Jackson is in it

OMG I SAID YES TO THIS MOVIE?!

Dear Jackson (and other Twilight cast members as a cautionary tale),

So is this the part of this whole post Twilight thing where it’s starts getting sad  and awkward or is THIS a joke?

Cause seriously honey, if it isn’t I’m SO sad right now. Like maybe you were doing this for a friend or you were having fun on a weekend but I’m not sure whoever is marketing this knows that. I’m also pretty sure someone shot this on their iPhone, right? I’m shaming myself but I’m pretty sure one of those 100 Monkey’s guys (or his evil twin) is an actor in this and that makes me think Zombie Hamlet was the ultimate downfall of 100 Monkeys and now we all know who to thank blame for that tragedy.

Yoko

Yoko

Was Zombie Hamlet really the shitty straw that broke the camels/100 Monkey’s back? Was even Sheila embarrassed that you had done this “favor for a friend” that she had to put her foot down and insist the band break up? I mean she’s pretty much the Yoko of the 100 Monkey’s even though like NO ONE cares and it’s sacrilegious that I even use a Beatles reference in the same breath as your old band. So maybe Zombie Hamlet has taught us that we owe Sheila a muffin basket or a thank you gift cards to Hot Topic so she can get some more Manic Panic and the Betty Page story so she can buy some more vintage knock off rock-a-billy dresses.

Ok… so…

OMG ZOMBIE HAMLET IS A REAL THING!!! This is not a joke people, I just IMDB-ed that and it has an actual profile. JACKSON! I sure hope whatever Agent still takes your calls after Airbender has a favor left with the people at IMDB and can get your name removed from this ASAP. Oh and don’t think I didn’t see your headshot on IMDB. Really????

Jackson… remember the good times? Remember when we just wanted to not hear you talk and watch you play with you bat? Ahem. Remember when Jasper didn’t look crazy? Remember how my LTT Forum signature still has gifs of YOU (and Rob)? Let’s go back to those times… let’s go back to you not making questionable choices like Zombie Hamlet.

To do this movie or NOT to do this movie, that is the question… you should ALWAYS ask yourself.
Themoonisdown

PS Are you a dad yet??

Really people, is this a joke? Are we now in that twilight of uh… Twilight and we’re going to be seeing a lot more Zombie Hamlets from z list Twilight’s? Who’s definitely going to Netflix this so you can laugh HARD when it goes straight to DVD?

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  • Sisterpenguin

    Oh deary dear. I think it would have been nobler in the mind to suffer, the slings and arrows of outrageous fortune than be in this little beauty. 
    Let’s look at it in a positive light: more material for LTT posts!

  • Late Convert

    This was a great post, but you left out one minor detail from the IMDB page ie the part where it says 

     “Inspired by an actual incident.”

    • MariaCecilia

      I knew it! Hamlet got bit by a zombie when he was abroad, and then he came home and started groaning “Braaiin..” all around Elsinore! The facts are out there, people!

      • Sisterpenguin

        And the sequel’s already written: Rosencrantz and Guildenstern are dead

  • JodieO

    Damn, damn, damn!  John Amos is in it!  And Shelly Long!  And Jason Mewes! And HULK HOGAN!  It’s like Variety put out an ad for people who used to be major stars.  Also, JUNE LOCKHART?!

    PS. Did you notice that Jackson is listed as being uncredited?

    • MariaCecilia

      Yeah, because who is going to give him cred for THAT?!

  • http://letterstokristen.wordpress.com/ KStewBoy

    Forget straight to DVD, this stinker is going straight to VHS.

  • ladyofthemeadow

    “Take out all the talky-talky stuff and it might be all right” pretty much summarizes what I think about this movie trailer. Total crap!

    I am so distancing myself from this movie. Jackson who??

    • ambernorton

      I think a lot of people are saying “Jackson who?” and not just because of this movie. 

  • BeaDee

    This is all kinds of win. But my favorite part of the post is seeing “Posted by themoonisdown” again. It’s been too long! Glad to have you back.

    • MariaCecilia

      Yes, I am suffering some serious withdrawal symptoms here, stumbling around my apartment, moaning “Mooon…Mooon…”

  • MarbleNutSlut

    Guys. PFach has been tweeting mall appearances lately and I am like, YOU STILL HAVE A MOVIE COMING OUT WTF ARE YOU DOING??? That’s 10 years out shit, Peter, divorce or no divorce.

    • MariaCecilia

      At least he’s not tweeting divorce court appearances…

  • MariaCecilia

    Hey, don’t diss the zombies, they’re the Next Big Thing, so obviously a young actor on the up and up will play in a zombie movie, any zombie movie…okay maybe not the zombie re-make of “Annie”.
    Actually, if Hamlet was in fact a zombie it would explain a lot of things, like how his father and Ophelia REALLY died, and why he stomps around the castle not getting much done for several acts. Go for it Jackson, baby!

  • twiprof

    Poor Jackson! I am sorry to say, but there is a market for the whole zombie thing, ya know like Pride and Prejudice and Zombies? Maybe this movie is good, and we will never know…..:)

    • ambernorton

      Yeah – he may be on the forefront of something “up and coming” and this movie will rake in the dough.  I don’t see anyone metioning that the band previously named 100 monkeys scored this movie. On the movie poster “Music By: 100 Monkeys” So the movie looks like shit and now I know the music will be shit also.

  • Ms. J

    WHOA There everybody….. Zombies…and JJ’s daddy…and Hulk Hogan.  YES YES YES – sorry this is soooooo my kind of movie.  I am a huge movie snob but I knows what makes me laugh.  And I did shamelessly LAUGH at the trailer.  I for one do hope it goes straight to Netflix.  Its cheaper than going to the movies & I don’t have to explain myself to my other movie snob friends.  Win Win for Me!!

  • Stacey

    Well you know, with the little one on the way, Jackson is going to need to save up for college for the kid. It isn’t getting any cheaper! Oh Jackson, what’s next? Victim number 2 on CSI? You’ve been Jasper, man! Darn it!

    Oh wait…Huffington Repot says your buddy report says your buddy, Rob Pattinson is up for Finnick in Huger Games (yeah right), better get busy with those auditions, buddy!

  • Bubs

    Speaking of being in the “twilight of uh…Twilight” [good line Moon]. My husband n I saw Bel Ami today [in Australia]. We really liked it. Thought Rob was great [and I’m Team Jacob through n through]-held his own around some excellent acting by the women and other men. I feel his acting is getting better with age [or maybe it’s the role] and I have to admit he looks quite “hot” too. I’m recommending it to my friends……

  • Stranger Beauty

    My friend once said about him: “this idiot is the second-rate actor with mediocre girlfriend, who playd in so-so movies. And YES, he is not juat silly boy, he is an IDIOT”. And do you know, what? In three months after this conversation, it was announced he plays Leo Myshkin in “Idiot”!

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