The Breaking Dawn standoff- we know what it’s about

Dear Breaking Dawn,

I saw this new EPIC FINALE IMAGE (side note: will the word EPIC ever stop being used so EPICALLY?) and immediately disregarded the “Breaking Dawn Coming Soon” text that was in between the two groups. I mean like anyone actually thinks they’re having a STAND OFF over a bunch of words.

I cropped out that text no one cares about for you

Was Michael Sheen like “Oh no! Beller told me that the movie comes out on the 21sth. That little liar” And Beller is like “I REALLY wish they came up with something more creative than BREAKING DAWN PART 2 like “THIS MOVIE IS ALL ABOUT BELLER BEING A KICK A VAMPIRE, BIATCHES” ”

Riggght like anyone believes THAT’S what they’re doing here. It’s clear they are racing towards something… and it’s obvious what it is:

They want to talk to UC & Moon FIRST on the red carpet duh!

Other options if it isn’t US they’re racing towards (but it is):

  • They could be trying to be first to volunteer as tribute
  • They could be racing to the hair department on set to find the least worst wig
  • They could be racing to save the ROBSTEN bear-skin rug from the incinerator the moving company is about to use back from when Rob hired them to remove all Kristen’s stuff. Remember when ROBSTEN was broken??
  • They could be running away from Jackson after he asked for a volunteer for diaper duty
  • Maybe they are running to be on time for Kellan’s Bible Study
  • They might have heard that the Olive Garden has a new happy hour
  • I bet they REALLY are running towards the EPIC LTT party we’re throwing on 11/11 (location TBD (But LA) be there)
  • Maybe they are running towards their nearest airport to burn all the 50 Shades of Grey books.
But they’re most likely just running to line up to talk to UC & Moon.
We’re waiting for you with open arms. ROB THAT MEANS YOU <— watch that again

Sidenote: Summit has made BILLIONS off this movie and they’re still using interns to create their photos? Or…. nevermind interns would be better.. they’re using the studi owner’s mom and her 2003 version of Microsoft publisher, right? THEY MADE THAT GUY FROM PUSHING DAISIES LOOK TERRIBLE, GUYS.

  • MrsKowski

    Wow, that image is BAAAD! I mean, I don’t even know who some of the people are supposed to be? The blonde with the bob behind Aro? Did I miss a Faces Friday post? and the guys further down …are they supposed to be Demetri & Felix? They look NOTHING like they have in the past. Guess I shouldn’t be surprised.

    I’m excited for the 11th …SEE YOU THERE!!

    • TeamJacobEdward

      Blond dude behind Aro is Caius. I’m not sure, but I think the guy next to Aro might be Alec. But I can’t tell for certain (and seriously I should be able to!). Then, yes Demetri and Felix.

      • celestialchic

        OMG! It IS Caius! Glad you were here to tell us. That really does look like a woman. I guess Caius’ snow white hair is turning on him. It’s sucks that the hair/makeup people suck, but it’s fun reading everybody make fun of it all, so I’m kind of glad they suck for selfish reasons.

        • ladyofthemeadow

          It’s Caius. Looks like the hair people got a new flatiron and wanted to try it out on some really unruly hair. Jamie Campbell Bower has the most wild looking hair, so he was the unlucky target.

          Either that, or Jamie Campbell Bower is channelling his inner Victoria Beckham.

  • Sue G.

    I thought the wolves were suppose to be bigger than the humans….why do they look so small?

  • The Old One

    Forever wondering how they managed (and why) to make some very beautiful people look hideous. Year after year. I wonder who they think the audience is who would appreciate the stupidity of their marketing. The fans just barely tolerate the images they put out because they have no choice, and anyone who is not a fan would not be drawn to see the movie because of the posters. It’s bizarre. As bizarre as the hair and makeup.

  • TeamJacobEdward

    They’re fighting over jorts. That’s obviously the “something” they have that Aro said he wanted in that little scene after the credits of BDI. Look at the wolves. They look the most pissed.

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