Brunching Ashley Greene

(Get ready to pee your pants of the laughter and the epicness, then get ready to tweet @AshleyMGreene because this really needs to happen. Aren’t in luff with White Yorkie yet? Remind yourself here.)
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Brunch with White Yorkie?! Where do I sign up???

Well hello there, Ladies (and gentleman).

White Yorkie here, everybody’s favorite unicorn…  Well, everybody’s favorite other than the Font, but I lost him in the crowd at BronyCon (trust me, click on that link) this year, so you’re stuck with me.As you may be aware, Ashley Greene is near and dear to my heart.  Soon after writing this post yesterday, I looked at my clock and realized 9 hours had passed.  And then I looked at my screen and realized I had 25 ¾ pages of meandering (yet heartfelt) love sonnets.  I’ll spare you that and instead say this:

If it were up to me, all the films would focus on Alice and not this other chick Blecha or whoever-the-crap.  At the very least she should get her own Saturday morning cartoon spinoff series:  The Adventures of Alice Cullen & Friends.  It would be Masters of The Universe meets Muppet Babies.  Or Darkwing Duck meets Eek! The Cat.  Or The Snorks meets NYPD Blue.  You understand.

The real point is, this week both me and Ashley Greene will be at San Diego Comic-Con.  Now some might look at this situation and say to themselves, “Yeah, sure.  I could possibly maybe might see the love of my life from like a brajillion feet away.  We’re only separated by 5,000 sweaty mouth-breathers.  What a good day.”  But no.  White Yorkie ain’t having that shit.  I see this as the perfect opportunity to fulfill a lifelong dream.

Hmmmmm pancakes… smoothies…. eggs…. what do I want…

I’m gonna make breakfast for Ashley Greene.

And trust me…  you (talking to Ashley now) are in for a treat.

Girl, I can make you eggs.  Sunnyside up?  You bet.  Poached?  Ain’t no thang.  Scrambled?  Child, please.  You like ‘em a little runny?  I got you covered.

Girl, I can make you toast.  I’ll be slicing a loaf of whole grain (gluten free if you’re into that sorta thing) to the beat of Father John Misty like it’s my J-O-B.

Girl, I can blend the shit out of fresh fruit and greens.  Yeah, I’m talk’n smoothies.  Mangos?  You bet your sweet ass.  Kale?  I ain’t scurred.  You like ‘em super green with Dandelion Greens and Chard?  I’m your huckleberry.  (Plus I’ll bring my Vitamix 5200 so you know I’m not messing around.)

We can talk about “movies” versus “films.”  The intricacies of Robyn.  Even the implications of the God Particle if you’re feeling especially sciency.

Alright, so here’s the deal LTTers.  I need your help.  You might be asking why I deserve it.  The truth is, I don’t.  But what mere human really deserves the company of this beauty?

The real answer to that question is “none alive.”  But today’s answer is “White Yorkie.”

Basically what I’m asking you to do is to spend the next few days leading up to Comic-Con twitter-bombing Ashley Greene.  Just a little note letting her know that I’m ready and willing.  Something like:

White Yorkie wants to make you breakfast at Comic-Con!  He’s so dreamy and junk!

Or

I really wish I had guys the caliber of White Yorkie wanting to make me breakfast!  Swoon!

Or

When White Yorkie makes you breakfast pretty please take pics!  OMFGROTFLCOPTER!

Just be sure to #brunchingashleygreene

You can also take a picture like this one and throw it on the ol’ Instagram and tag Ashley in it.

I will return from my adventures with extensive writings, photos, and perhaps even video.  And I will also be forever in your debt, Interwebs.  That means I owe you Italian food and at least a trip to second base the next time you’re in town.

Okay, here’s all the important details:

When: Comic-Con 2012 in San Diego.  Thursday-Sunday.  My schedule is flexible.
Where:  LTT headquarters in the Gaslamp District.  It’s legit swank.
Who:  White Yorkie, Moon, Ashley Greene.
How:  twitter:  @ashleymgreene
Instagram: ashleymgreene
#brunchingashleygreene

Please help me in my quest to brunch Ashley Greene.

White Yorkie out.

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**Yup, that’s right White Yorkie along with me and BrookeLockhart will be at Comic Con tearing it up on your behalf at all the Twilight events as well as all the other bizarro crap we’re into and will report on over at That’s Normal. So make White Yorkie’s day and tweet the crap out of Ashley Greene cause really, ya never know what will happen. Also if you’ll be at Comic Con stay tuned to our Twitter @Letter2Twilight because we might just be going something cool and what you there! **

28 Commented


It has arrived – That’s Normal!

Dear Twilight,

Are you like us? Is the internet more than just a place to Google how you spell Renesmee or tweet your Breaking Dawn Pt 2 predictions or find embarassing Robsten videos so you can post them on your friends Facebook wall? Yea, us too. Don’t get us wrong, we LOVE a good sepia toned video of TRUE love as much as the next Twi fan but we also love pondering the relationship status of Ryan Gosling and Eva Mendes or discussing the how awesome/awful Hannah from Girls is and of course there’s nothing like Googling awful Games of Thrones fan art.

So yes, the time has come. Many have been asking, many have not been asking. No, we’re not talking about UC and my’s civil union ceremony.  We’re talking about our latest blogging venture. It’s called That’s Normal because as we’ve come to find out over the last almost 4 years (!!!) nothing we do is ever normal but we found people out there (YOU!) who like the same bizarro crap we do. So because of that and because we have so much more to talk about than just Twilight we are happy/excited/scared/ecstatic to announce our new blog -

That’s Normal!

Yup, you know why we chose that name, it all started here. That’s Normal is full of the same stuff you’ve come to love here at LTT and LTR but now we’re branching out into everything! TV, film, books, weird stuff on the interwebs, why that Carly Rae Jenson song is infectious and so annoying at the same time and pretty much everything else we find interesting.

We’re currently in the construction phase of the brand spanking new blog but you can find a taste of what’s to come over at our Tumblr.
Follow That’s Normal on Twitter
Like us on Facebook
Circle us on Google+

Now does this mean we won’t be posting here on LTT? HALE to the nah. We still love you like that old lady secretary at work loves Fifty Shades of Grey. Ew. We’ll be writing letters to all things Twilight on Tuesdays and Thursdays and any other days that call for it (Taylor opening a martial arts studio called Face Punch).

We hope you’ll join us as we roll out this new chapter in blogging because we love ya so much and we knew we just couldn’t quit you!

That’s Normal (duh),
Moon & UC

30 Commented

Posted in: LTT
Tags: , ,

A (very) moving Happy Birthday to UC

Dear UC,

It’s your birthday today! Duh, you were born today you remember this but I wanted to make sure everyone else remembered so I did a little Google Hangout (duh) with some of our old pals…

1st up was Kristen because I had to pull the bandaid off and knew she’d be on her SWATH/MTV Movie awards high, so I was like dude, Kristen it’s our girl UC’s birthday and she was all…

and I was like  wow, it’s amazing that after all the things we’ve said, you can just let bygones be bygones and get excited about UC’s birthday and then she was like, oh wait who is this?! And I was like ummmm this is Moon from LTT and it’s UC’s birthday, is there anything you want to give her?


It’s funny the video cut out after that…

So then I called up Taylor and I was like can you do what you do best? And he was like…

and I was like TAYLOR… this is your thing!

And he was like…

And I was like COME ON Taylor… just DO IT… all the kids are doing it…

So then he did this…

And I was like ummm… no, Taylor… that was nice and you’re talented and all but YOU KNOW WHAT I MEAN…


Yup, that’s it!


PS Big Daddy wouldn’t do it either… I asked… no really, I BEGGED.
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I called up Nikki and she was like…
 what’s the point?

And I was like NIKKI… it’s her birthday… so she gave you some of her Deb modeling poses.

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Then ol Kel belle was up next… yes, video chatting Kellan…

Um Kellan… we’re supposed to be talking about UC’s birthday…


KELLAN!!! Stop distracting me… what are you getting UC for her birthday?


Ok, that’s a good start… can you sub that dog for  a cat?


Yes… getting warmer…

Then this guy showed up…

PERFECT Kellan. PUUUUURRRRRFECT. #paulwesleysabs
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And I knew no birthday would be complete without a little Gos, so I called this guy up…

and he was SO pumped. He had a ton of ideas for bday gifts for you…


He wrote you some poetry…

then he cried, it was so beautiful.

 

and then some of them were all like WHAT are we going to give her, we can never top last year… not to mention since Breaking Dawn stopped filming like over a year ago, some of us are broke. So I told them you know what she likes…


These two did a dance

and I was like ummm maybe not. And Jackson was all..

and I was like no, cause you’re doing that with your mouth… AGAIN.

This guy’s too broke to have a gif but here he is writing you a birthday song (in Quilluette)

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This guy made you his own gif…

I think he may have recycled this from his niece’s softball tournament but ya know… take what you can from Mike Welch, I’m surprised he even answered my Google Hangout request after I yelled Rob in his face at the BD premiere. No hard feelings Mike! This is for UC.

After I reminded them that you’ve been blogging about them for almost 4 years, come rain or shine, cease and desists, mean tweets, nice emails, meeting THE SMeyer, figuring out how to make the forum work again and the list does on, they spontaneously started a slow clap…

everyone.gave.you.a.slow.clap.






every.one.even.the.weasley.twins.

and then this happened…

and it just kept going… we all knew you deserved the longest slow clap in internet history because you’re that good… handling all the business and keeping shit in check and reading emails and telling me to do things, being the best super fan ever, being a pretty rad girl and  then there was so much stuff we remembered about you we couldn’t stop clapping.

Since we couldn’t keep this slow clap up forever  we decided to get you this bunch of cat gifs instead…


And then I found these RYAN GOSLING AS A CAT GIFS (yes, you read that right) and it was all over




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Happiest Birthday UC!!! I’m looking forward to this year and all it’s possibilities, changes and opportunities. Wishing you all of the very bestest.

XOXOXOXOXO
Moon
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PS If you want to see what YOU KNOW WHO DID when I called you know where to go…
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Share a UC birthday gif in the comments!!!

Source: all the gif makers who made these, you are a rockstar. If you made one let us know in the comments.

Our internet game is ridiculous: LTRThe ForumTwitterThe Store

27 Commented


The happiest of birthdays to themoonisdown

Dear themoonisdown,

HAPPIEST OF HAPPY BIRTHDAYS!!!!! Today we’re celebrating YOU & sharing all the things we love. 15 things to be exact. Why 15? Well, 15 was an awkward age no one wants to remember. So you should be grateful you’re not turning 15 today! So without further ado, here are the 15 Things about YOU that I love, plus a bunch of LTT friends love too:

1. I love that when I first met Moon (and UC) back at the New Moon premiere time (remember that whole gyno debacle?) she immediately hugged me like she had known me for years and made me feel like we were life long friends! -KrazyKidd (whose excuses to her job for why she needs time off to come to LA for a movie premiere have ranged from a 3-day long gyno appointment to claiming she’s IN a wedding (which of course meant she was attending Bella & Edward’s wedding))

2. She reps her love for Jacksper.  Our first LTT connection was over a swoon-tastic picture of Jackson Rathbone (in the wake of Twilight, pre-100 Monkeys and not showering).  Then she put the epic picture of Jackson on a bicycle up on the forum.  We had many a happy chat over that hot midget.  We shipped some Jashley (another bicycle that I’m SURE Jackson rode) for a while.  And then, the first time I met Moon in person, she was lounging by a pool in LA wearing a Jackson Rathbone Twi t-shirt on loan from our fellow Jackson lover, TxLiLi.

Jackson has changed over the years, and so have we, but trust me, Moon only gets better and better.  Freya

3. I love Moon because 3 years ago she sent me a picture of Rob that has been displayed by my computer ever since. He’s strumming his imaginary guitar & she made a bubble with “You shook me all night long” on it. I cherish it. -lula34

4. Everyone once in a while “Let Me Sign” comes on the ipod…and I immediately stop what I’m doing and picture Moon and I. Our boom box, the random dog on the street corner, us in wedding dresses and doc martens….running into traffic. That is probably one of my favorite inside jokes ever, and one I won’t ever forget. She even made me a jpg of our little carefully thought out scenario on the blog for my birthday that year, which I’m sure everyone thought was creepy and weird. No worries, we aren’t suicidal, just realistic that it was more likely we would die in traffic than actually get swept off our feet by Edward Cullen… :)

One of my other favorite Moonie memories over the years was rewriting songs with her. There was always lots of flannel mentioned, and those chats were so long, into the night, and with our 2 hour time difference, I would say “oh its 4am…I should probably sleep. My poor kids ate cereal on those mornings. We even attempted to record us singing on of the songs…on the phone…or something. It didn’t work. At all.

Can’t believe LTT and LTR became what they did, and I cherish the friendships I’ve made. Happy Birthday Moon! I’ll meet ya in traffic! -Kristin

5. Happy Birthday Moon!!! Thank you for the years of laughing inappropriately at work! Thanks for bringing the Twilight snark with style. Even now, 3 years later, when my wee one watches cartoons, and this comes on:

I ALWAYS fight the urge to exclaim, THEY’RE NOT BEARS!” Who am I kidding, I give in to the urge. You are responsible for that. Happy Birthday Lady!! -snowwhitedrifted

6. I love how many pictures of Action Figure we took together during a 3 day period back in 2009 -unintededchoice

7. I LOVE that although she vowed NEVER to camp out for anything twi related she was such a trooper last year and actually camped out for one night for the Breaking Dawn panel. -KrazyKidd

8. I love Moon for her AMAZING fashion sense. -Carter

9. I love that I can count on Moon to break down and explain every soundtrack for Twi. I would also like her to do this for every other soundtrack that sounds good. I need music explained to me. I am music stupid. Also I will always and forever love her for the picture that almost broke twitter of Robsten getting into the cab. Amazing Ninja picster. -Janetrigs

 

10. I love that she does photoshoots with me in the woods that look like Forks where it’s completely normal to have “Edward” photoshopped into the tree afterward -unintendedchoice

11. well, I  remember /the/ night not so long ago (august 2009?) that I met her at The Hotel Cafe to see Marcus, Sam or Bobby perform, not sure I don’t remember… but, the night I met Moon in real life (Ashfrag was also with her) was also the night that HHH Rob showed up with, wait as I type this it’s all coming back to me… Bobby was performing, it was the weekend of the teen choice awards, Rob showed up with Kristen and Moon got the photo of them!  Marcus was also there and they stood just feet from us!  What a way to meet and make such a wonderful friend. Then radar online started a fight about not seeing Rob and Nikki was “whatchu talking bout willis” I got interviewed as a “onlooker and source” by peoplemagazine online and yeah, best, most epic weekend ever, all because I met Moon! -emmyloowhoo

12. I love Moon because she lets me come over to the big blue house, drink her diet coke, watch her tv, she fills me in on the twi-gossip (aka the crazies on the internets) and oh, we also talk about our lives. she’s pretty awesome. -hisoneandonly

13. Happy Birthday Moon!! To the one girl who would understand the sentiment of a Ralph’s sheet cake with the word “Ole” on top which was hand crafted & decorated on the hood of a truck!! Big hugs on your BIG day!! xxoo -Obird

14. I love that Moon is always game. I mean, SHE WAS ON A TWILIGHT BLOG PANEL at TWICON. How can you not love that she’ll totally embarrass herself for our enjoyment?

Men also fall at her feet. I totally ship her and a certain guy who loves starbucks… TOTES. -Brookelockart

15. I love that this was our combined Twilight collection in 2009 & it’s probably 3 times as big now. And how incredibly normal this makes me feel:

In fact, that’s what I love most about you, Moon— you make me feel normal about all these things that have been so-very-far-from-normal for all these years!!

Happy Birthday dear friend. I’m not sure anything can top the last few years we had together. But I’m happy to try! XOXO forever and ever and ever

Love,
UnintendedChoice & friends

THANKS TO EVERYONE WHO SENT ME LOVE FOR MOON’S BIRTHDAY!

Now it’s YOUR turn– share something that YOU love about Moon!

And I promised a winner from the comments last week. This is what made me LAUGH OUT LOUD the hardest:

Congrats Kindred Spirit! E-mail us @ letterstotwilight@gmail.com with your address & we’ll get you your prize!

 

Our internet game is ridiculous: LTR, The Forum, Twitter, The Store

31 Commented

Posted in: Holidays, LTT
Tags: , , ,

Random Ramblings for your Monday..

Dear Twilight,

I miss dressing in disguise like this

I know it seems like Moon & I don’t care, but we do. We really do. We spend at least a good 5 minutes a day complaining to each other about how much we miss you & the fun we’ve had. And GET THIS– we have to schedule time to talk to each other. Really. Moon sends me a Google invite to schedule a meeting. I tell her all the time I really only like BING invites (brainwashed by The CW) but she keeps sending them from Google. I have no idea why.

I miss this

Anyway, I just wanted to pop in & give you an update on what I’ve been up to. Besides my week of sickness resulting in an eye infection, ear infection & possible sinus infection (yes I’m a 4 year old). I cleaned my closet. And realized that the big box of crap that Stephenie Meyer sent us after the epic meeting in 2010 STILL has crap left in it (ps: it’s the crappiest crap left, of course) and it’s taking up room in my closest, and I’m OVER it. So please comment with something that makes me laugh & I’ll send a random commenter something crappy (no you’ll love it! promise!)

Anyway, I want to tell you some REALLY exciting news: I’m writing a BOOK! Yes!!! I know! About time, right? It’s still in the works, but here’s a quick synopsis:

Kathy & Peter are from the same rural territory. Every year a young boy & girl are chosen from each territory and taken to the big city where they are televised and forced to prove their sexual prowess in something called “The Sexual Games,” created for the enjoyment of the residents of the city. Kathy is strong. In the beginning when all participants are meeting each other in a sort-of “speed dating” called “speed flirting” where you show off your skills to each other, she impresses the guys with her impeccable skill at darts. And Peter is incredible in the kitchen. Woman get woozy just by smelling his cinnamon buns.

As the games are set to begin, the participants are standing in a circle waiting for the gunshot to let them know it’s time. In the center of the partipants are “tools” they’ll need for the games. After the shot is fired, everyone runs towards the gear– they have to pick up tools like sexy lingerie, whips, chains, cartons of lube, condoms, dildos and a few surprises I won’t share here!

Kathy & Peter aren’t the best match. Kathy wasn’t ready for the games– she had a potential mate back home (Dale) and Peter just isn’t confident. But throughout my story you’ll see Kathy & Peter come together for the games (pun intended)– knowing that if they are going to win “The Sexual Games” they had better have the hottest sex in front of the cameras they can possible have. And through their fight, they might just find love. You’ll just have to wait & see!

What do you think? If my first printing goes well, I think I’m going to sell the movie rights! Oh and before you ask– yes, I have the same lawyer as E.L. James!

In other news, someone marvelous got this tattoo:

Yes. It’s a tattoo of jorts. On a guy. A guy with a lot of tattoos. Who I’m pretty sure isn’t actually part of “Team Jacob.” But it has jorts GUYS! I’m pretty sure I’m in love with him for doing this. Thanks Sianna for sending it to us!

So that’s what’s new with me. Now make me laugh so I can send you some crap

XX,

UnintendedChoice

 

Our internet game is ridiculous: LTR, The Forum, Twitter, The Store

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