Getting Twilosophical with Stephenie Meyer

Dear LTTers,

Week after week now we’ve given you the goods on our interview with Stephenie Meyer. We’ve shocked you with our “Eff, Kill, Marry (Leg Hitch, Imprint, Hunt)” question, we’ve made you laugh with our Leg hitch picture and we’ve proved we’re the best of all time with our smooth, cool demeanor- even when she told us she reads LTT every day (Hey Steph!)

But we know you’ve been DYING to know details about the questions we asked about Bree & Fred and the connection between Diego & Bree and why Stephenie choose to let Fred escape but kill both Bree & Diego. Oh wait, you don’t want to hear about that? Oh that’s right- you would have killed us had we asked crap like that and then made you listen to it.

However, our interview wasn’t all fun & games- we did have some serious questions for Steph. I mean…. how could we look at ourselves if we didn’t get Twilosophical with the creator of it all?

Today’s discussion topics:

  • Redemption in Twilight (hollaaaaa) & what happened to Bree? Vampire Heaven? H-E-Double-Hockey Sticks?
  • What did Steph’s kids watch on TV when she was writing Twi?
  • What makes Stephenie want to kill Nacho Pancho
  • Edward’s evolution throughout the saga
  • When Nacho got HOT(ter) & whether or not Mr. Choice is awkward around kids

LTT Interviews Stephenie Meyer Set 4 by letterstotwilight

Yeah… you heard that right- Stephenie said “The Font” and called them “Your Unicorns” Wanna hear that again? We do too:

The Font, right?

SM The Font by letterstotwilight

Your Unicorns:

SM Unicorns by letterstotwilight

You know that’s not the last time you’re gonna hear those audio clips!

Phew- that was way Twilosophical for today. How ’bout I remind you that the marjority of the interview was like this:

Lots and lots and lots of laughter (and way weird faces from UC and Moon almost kneeing Stephenie in the face)

Love,
UnintendedChoice

Catch all our other interview recaps

Send in stuff that made you think of Moon for “While Moon was Gone

BIG LTT Thanks to:
Samuel from Twifans who did a TON of audio editing. HE RULES!!!!

Legal Stuff:
All photographs are owned by Stephenie Meyer and there may be no copying or other exploitation of such photographs without the express prior written permission of Stephenie Meyer, c/o Jodi Reamer jreamer@writershouse.com
All Photos: Julie Adamson

Our internet game is ridiculous: LTR, The Forum, Twitter, The Store

49 Commented


What if Twilight didn’t Fade to Sad?

Dear Twilight hornballs,

When Moon & I gave Stephenie her LTT gifts after our big interview, she opened up the notebook that said “Fade to Black Sad” on the front (inside contained a private, REAL “letter To Stephenie” (sneak peek: “We love you more than Robsteners love the idea of Rob & K getting it on on a bear skin rug in front of a fire”)) she said (I’m paraphrasing), “I’m sorry guys- I just can’t write what really happens! I have kids- I can’t read that to them” (She DOES read her books to her kids! AW- “Mommy- what’s a leg hitch?” “Come here, Pancho, let’s show them how it’s done”) And I responded (paraphrasing)- “WE HATE YOU SO MUCH We understand. As much as we want to know the details that exist in YOUR magnificent brain, if you were really specific your story would end up on the shelf next to those books with Fabio on the cover.”

And it’s true. Can you imagine if Breaking Dawn DIDN’T “fade to black?” I mean, isn’t the sexual tension and the non-sex what keeps the story going at times? As much as I love reading a little sexytimes story to pick up new tips- I’m sorry- any story that says “shaft” isn’t one I feel I can proudly show on my bookshelf. Here I’ll prove it:

He stood, his back to me, waist deep in the midnight water, staring up at the oval moon. The pallid light of the moon turned his skin a perfect white, like the sand, like the moon itself, and made his wet hair black as the ocean…The water was so clear, I swear I could make out the entirety of his shaft.

How’s that for a description? Don’t you wish included more details like that? Here’s another:

I slipped the towel off without hesitation, leaving it on the tree with his clothes, and walked out into the white light; it made me pale as the snowy sand too… I stepped in, walking carefully across the invisible ocean floor, but my care was unnecessary; the sand continued perfectly smooth, sloping gently toward Edward. I waded through the weightless current till I was at his side, and then I placed my hand lightly over his cool hand lying in the water…”Bella touch my shaft” he whispered.

RobioDamn I’m all hot and having visions of Edward as Fabio right now.  It CAN believe it’s butter, baby….

I was talking to @Brookelockart about this very topic & she said she doesn’t necessarily wish for lemons, but she would like a little lemon zest from time to time. I think she means something a little bit like this:

He shuddered the tiniest bit at my warm touch. His breath came rougher now. “I promised we would try,” he whispered, suddenly tense. “If… if I do anything wrong, if I hurt you, you must tell me at once…” At that moment I had such a wet center that all I could think of was his throbbing member.

Now THAT’S the story I always wanted. Don’t want me to stop!? Okay:

“Don’t be afraid,” I murmured. “We belong together.” I was abruptly overwhelmed by the truth of my own words. And by the heat radiating from my wet sex. This moment was so perfect, so right, there was no way to doubt it.

NOW the story is perfect!!! Actually, if you did think my addition to the quotes added an element to the story you were really missing, it’s probably time you donate your stack of $3.99 paperbacks from Wal-mart to a local dumpster. Maybe we want to know MORE of what happened, but have you ever read a book that’s delivered the goods without going the ‘way of the shaft?’ I’ve read some HOT book sex scenes. I remember story time at the beach while on vacation with friends when ItalianGirl read a scene out loud of sex & cigarettes while riding horseback. It was GREAT- but the word “Shaft” was used like 120 times. Seriously. We get it. The dude has a big one. You liked it, female protagonist.

Isn’t the “fade to sad” why we love the #LegHitch so much!? It’s something FINALLY worthy of interest for those 14 or older that goes down between Edward & Bella. And we hold our breath and wait while Edward’s hand trails down Bella’s calf and under her knee to pull up her leg and hitch it around his hip. SQUEE! As (mostly) grown, experienced women, that sort of stuff shouldn’t excite us the way it does. But it DOES. And I’m so glad. It reminds me of my innocence so long gone. And while I want more- and REALLY want to know what happens in Stephenie’s mind (There’s a pool in Arizona that had Isle Esme acted out in its entirety I’m SURE!) if the options are “Fade to Sad” vs “Fade to Shaft…” wellllll, I guess I’ll take sad.

His arms wrapped around mine, holding me against him, summer and winter. It felt like every nerve ending in my body was a live wire. “Forever,” he agreed, and then pulled us gently into the deeper water. And onto his shaft.

Sorry! Couldn’t resist!

Love,
UnintendedChoice

PS: I asked for Mr. Choice to suggest “non-perverse but totally gross sex words” to help me with this letter & while I appreciated his desire to help….. well, no… I did not use his suggestions!

So what do you think? Ever read a non-shaft-mentioning sex story that WASN’T worthy of Fabio on the cover? Think Breaking Dawn could have added a bit more details and stayed the way of the Twilight Saga- innocent yet filled with sexual tension? How upset WERE you that Breaking Dawn ended up “Fading to Sad?”

Did you know we sell “Fade to Sad” Stuff in our LTT_LTR store! Fade to Sad today!!!

Our internet game is ridiculous: LTR, The Forum, Twitter, The Store

177 Commented


Eclipse: Why didn’t we demand MORE

Dear Eclipse,

I have a confession. And it’s difficult to admit. I only saw you once. As of midnight tonight it will be a full 7 days since I’ve last seen your mediocrity brilliance on screen. I’m forgetting the details. Did it look like Sam Uley had eaten four or five donuts before running onto the screen shirtless for the first time? Was Jacob’s kiss with Bella as smooth as I imagine my first kiss with Rob will be? Or was it like my first kiss in 9th grade when Pat Samson’s tongue was shoved so far down my mouth I started to gag while my best friend’s dad looked on, waiting to take me home? Did Bella really not blink or stutter? No…. that can’t be right…And was there really no tweed? Not even a tweed pillow on Edward’s bed? The details.. they’re so foggy…

So while I wait to see you again, I’ve been chatting with some pals about you. At first it was “OMG GAH LEG HITCH LEG HITCH LEG HITCH I’M TIRED.” Then it was, “Man that was a great movie- well, except for the part when….. and then when…. remember how unintentionally funny it was when….” To “Was it really as good as I remember in my mind?” And that’s what we’re here to discuss. Because Lainey Gossip wrote this review, and while it was harsh and mean and a little more snarky than I usually like for something I love so much, it was mostly pretty much correct- especially when she said Kristen’s wig was the same one Taylor wore in Twilight. I know this to be a fact. I had a one-on-one with the wig lady to ask what the crap she was smoking (No I didn’t- but it’s my 2nd biggest dream next to bread-sticks with Big Daddy)

Lainey ends her review with this:

This, then, is the fundamental flaw about this franchise and a question I’ll throw out to fans of it: why don’t you demand more? Why do you keep rewarding garbage? If you love the series, why don’t you insist that they spend more time and money making it better? Why do you continue to support a mickey mouse production that cuts corners and insults your intelligence?

While we all have different experiences & like different things and disagree about what makes “art”, I think we can all agree that the critics don’t like the Twilight saga- maybe you think they’re SO wrong and should go to hell, but you have to admit that there’s a better chance of Butt Crack Santa & Harry Clearwater coming back from the dead to throw a joint block party where they fry fish & provide little bottles for the kids than for Eclipse to be nominated for any sort of legitimate industry award. Harry Potter gets legitimate nominations & the critics rave about the films. Why can’t Twilight be up to that level or caliber? And why don’t we demand it?

I answer all your burning questions after the jump! Continue…

162 Commented


Twilight & Religion

Dear Twilosophy Class,

Moon & I have made enough DC Talk references & basically figured out a way to text-represent the motions to “Lord I lift your name on High” that you must have figured out by now that we have a Christian background. It’s true- we were brought up in Christian homes which immediately makes sense to a bunch of you, confuses another group of you and turns the rest of you off.

We make Twilight-related Christian jokes sometimes that we know only those who can relate will get. Which is a shame b/c they are REALLY REALLY FUNNY.

Anyway, I got this t-shirt from my Bro-in-law who once brought my husband a t-shirt back from an abstinence conference that said “Lights, Camera, NO ACTION” with a director’s chair on the front. And after laughing hysterically and deciding which activity at church I’d wear it to, I sighed and wondered why religion had to be brought into everything. Can’t I just enjoy a book about vampires without someone making it into a Jesus-eternity reference? Apparently not. Please enjoy my t-shirt, found in the bargain bin at a Christian bookstore:

"What would people think if they hear that I'm a Twilight Freak" (and yes, I am wearing jorts)

Yep. That says “Jesus is THE LIGHT of the world” in the Twilight font and “because of Him You can Live Forever.” What!? It’s not because of Edward biting me than putting a syringe filled with venom into my heart that I can live forever!? I don’t care WHAT your religious beliefs are, any religious group using Twilight to get “Down with the kids” is just as bad as Burger King Edward crowns, Twilight maxi-pads & Volturi credit cards.

Why does this shirt exist? Is it because an pastor’s kid got a little too obsessed with Edward that she started thinking about HIM during nightly prayer? And then her dad, the pastor, called up his old roommate from seminary who runs a “ministry” selling Christian pop-culture t-shirts? Or was it the spurred on by the Pastor’s WIFE who brought vampire cupcakes to the Sunday afternoon potluck for new church members? And later that night she suddenly wanted to spice up their 23 year routine “missionary position” with a little biting of the neck and headboard banging? (*Waving hi to my favorite Pastor’s wife who frequents LTT!*)

There’s a site I go to when I feel like getting mad at the super conservative elements of my upbringing that I won’t dignify with a link because it doesn’t deserve it, but in their review of Twilight they pointed out the negative elements including:

Buttcrack-Santa NEGATIVE? Not-uh. You did NOT go there. That’s enough to make me renounce my faith RIGHT there.

Mormons, a video & a quote you DON’T want to miss, after the jump! Continue…

251 Commented


Twilosophy: Charlie & Renee – a parenting cop out?

Dear Twilosophy Majors,

My good pal nopaperkg has just recently begun reading Breaking Dawn and on our road trip back from the holiday break she turned on her copy of the Breaking Dawn audiobook. While the audiobook version is a whole ‘nother post for a different day suffice it to say it got me thinking again about the saga through new eyes. Something about hearing a woman imitating a man’s voice or maybe hearing the only book in the saga I’ve read once being dramatically read to me gave it new life. And it brought up some of my old questions I had that started back in the Twilight book. We listened to the chapter of Breaking Dawn where Charlie sees Bella for the first time since she’s been changed into a Vampire. He tells Bella that the less he knows the better. And so that got me to thinking…

Is Charlie’s (and for that matter Renee’s) parenting style a cop out? Now obviously, I’m not a parent, and who knows if I ever will be one, but I know from having a couple of really good parents of my own that none of this shiz Bella tries to pull would NEVER have flown. The “less I know, the better” would NOT have happened in my house. Especially if I supposedly came down with some tropical disease on my honeymoon that required me to go to the center of disease control. RIGHT. My mom would have beat me to the center before I ever got there. And the whole Renesmee is our maybe daughter/maybe niece who grows at an unnatural rate and has a betrothed that is a werewolf on the side. Nope, don’t want to know anything about it, TMI! YEA RIGHT.

Hey baby, I'll maybe see you in 2 years when you graduate. Oh wait, I won't.

Let’s take it back to New Moon. Had my boyfriend dumped me and left me in the woods which would lead me into a downward depression spiral my mom would have been on the first plane out. Especially if months went by where I became a zombie with night terrors and a penchant for dangerous after school activities. Is Charlie not sharing the whole truth with Renee? Is she too busy in Jacksonville with Phil the minor league baseball player to care about her child who is hurting?

Read more Twilosophy after the jump
Continue…

173 Commented


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