Dear Breaking Dawn,
Last week to celebrate the 71 lone days left before Breaking Dawn is released, the Village Voice (yes, the Village Voice) wrote a piece called “71 Things to do While you Wait for Breaking Dawn to finally be out in Theaters”
That’s right. They had 71 ideas. I read about 10 of them before I got bored (no offense, it’s just that… well, 71 is a lot of ideas.) But I particularly loved the image the included (left) and #53:
53. Consider how the title of Breaking Dawn includes all of the letters for “Edward.” Get chills.
But I thought it was a good idea. So now there are 66 days until Breaking Dawn Appears, and that is basically TEN weeks until it’s Breaking Dawn week. So here are my 8 ideas of what you can do while you wait for Breaking Dawn to FINALLY be out in theaters, because coming up with 10 was too hard:
1. Re-watch Twilight and be reminded that no one will ever be as loved as much as Buttcrack Santa
2. Learn who the heck the new vampires are and which are the cutest so you’re prepared for the crush you’ll inevitably develop on one of them (wait…. are we going to see new vamps in Part 1?)
3. Listen to the Twilight soundtrack while at work and TRY NOT to get all gooey inside during Iron & Wine’s “Flightless Bird, American Mouth” (aka the “Prom song.”) And I DARE YOU not to sing along to Paramore’s “Decode” or think about Rob making fun of how Hayley sings “Here”
4. Re-read your favorite fan fic version of Isle Esme & remind yourself that the movie won’t be like that because we don’t WANT Breaking Dawn Porn (Here is one Isle Esme fic I found after searching through the 334 messages that include the phrase “Isle Esme” in my gmail inbox (seriously))
5. Start throwing LTT jokes into every day conversation with random people to see if anyone “gets” it. “Look at that guy’s jorts. He could be a member of the wolfpack,” or “Hold me back, Chris Hansen” when you see a cute, younger guy (but, uh, not young enough that Chris Hansen should actually hold you back.)
6. Plan your voyage to “Mecca” (aka LA around November 18-22. You ARE coming right? I’ll be there with Moon! Get excited for something fun for LTT readers. Hopefully it involves Paramore Karoke)
7. Dust off Action-Figure Edward and have an adventure with him. Did you get a new job in the last 2 years? I’m pretty sure Edward needs to visit your office & be “accidentally” left in the kitchen so you can see how long it is until someone comments about him.
8. Re-watch some of our famous LTT videos & be reminded about how much fun we’ve had over the years:
and my personal favorite:
Is it November yet!?
10 weeks!!! Can you believe it? What else can we do to fill our time & prepare our hearts & minds for November’s craziness!
Tags: , 2nd hand embarrassment, action figure edward, Breaking Dawn, Chris Hansen, edward cullen, Jorts, Twilight, Video, Wolfpack