Twilight Dirt – All the news that’s fit to print

Do your Twitpics look THIS GOOD? David Slade's do

Do your Twitpics look THIS GOOD? David Slade’s do

Dear LTT-ers and Twihards,

It’s about that time again, yup we need to do a news dump, since we can’t write letters regarding EVERY little news piece nor do you want to hear us TRY to wax poetic about Sarah Clarke’s suitcase. I tried. It doesn’t work. So let’s get to it…

XO
Moon

  • If you’re not following David Slade on Twitter you are missing out on some awesome shiz, like pictures of Taylor doing backflips and THIS DUDE! This is the guy you see in the mirror after you chant “Red Rum” into your bathroom mirror with the lights off at your 6th grade sleepover. Eclipse crew are SEXYtimes.
  • Are you ready to simultaneously pee your pants, puke into the DVD storage unit near your tv, scream like a 14 yr old girl and hyperventilate? Yea, we are too! The holy trinity (Rob, KStew and Taycob) will be premiering a new (read: legit) trailer at the MTV Music Video Awards. And yes, Russell Brand is hosting again, get your pitch forks ready.

[vodpod id=Groupvideo.3347131&w=425&h=350&fv=configParams%3Dtype%253Dnormal%2526vid%253D431558%2526uri%253Dmgid%253Auma%253Avideo%253Amtv.com%253A431558%2526startUri%3Dmgid%253Auma%253Avideo%253Amtv.com%253A431558]

  • I’m beginning to think these biotches aren’t even in Eclipse, they’re just hanging out, walking through Vancouver with their hoods up, drinking smoothies and working out 23 hours a day. Seriously, who owns THAT MUCH workout gear?

MORE News after the cut!
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Kristen Stewart in Bella's new wig!

Oh crap, those were real scissors

Oh crap, those were real scissors

Dear Eclipse Wig Dept,

Since Eclipse started filming last week and no one’s seen Kristen Stewart in her new Bella get-up everyone’s been well: wigging out. Heh. Clearly fans have been flipping out since they saw Kstew’s Runaways hair and wondered what the crap you were going to do with it for Eclipse. Wigs? Tracks? A weave? Extensions?! The mind spins with options! Ok, maybe that’s the 2 “big girl” drinks I just had, but spinning none the less.

So maybe we weren’t so kind to your New Moon counterparts a few months ago when we saw poor Jackson in that god awful poodle wig that was designed for Jasper. I still shudder even now when I see it and don’t know if I’ll be able to overcome it when I’m watching the movie, but well, I guess that’s something you have to live with and not me. Just don’t be surprised if I have Vietnam style flashbacks during the premiere anytime Jasper is on screen. But anyhow, what I’m now currently worrying about is what Bella’s wig will look like. I know we all let out a collective gasp and clutched our throats when we saw that KStew up and got crazy and cut herself a mullet for Runaways filming (you guys more than us I’m sure). Cause now you have to deal with that dead raccoon on her head and turn it into beautiful Bella hair. Sucks to be you all. BUUTT since we’re professional bloggers and total Twilight nerds around here, we’re here to help and I’ve got a few suggestions that just might work for The Great Mullet Fiasco of 09…

Since we’re in a recession and Jacob is now a werewolf you won’t need his old wigs, so why not reuse that for Bella’s wig? Almost the same color, just curl it up a little and presto long hair! We’re in a recessional yall and we all know how Summit likes to save a few clams so WIN WIN!
bellajacobwig bellajacobwig02

And since we’re talking about re-using why not try out the old Jasper poodle wig?! What, Bella’s not blond? Who cares, make her squirm a little for cutting it all off.
bellajasperwig

Follow the cut to see some more AWESOME wigs!
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Where are you Nikki Reed?

Have you seen this girl?

Have you seen this girl?

Dear Nikki,

Monday when I was writing that post about Drunk emailing and how much would it cost to get a Twi star at your party, I was reviewing the list and kept wondering who I left out and then it dawned on me: I left out YOU! And so that’s why I wrote “Nikki – WHO?” Cause seriously girl where the h-word are you?! I’m kind of actually doing a Mom Moon and worrying about you and where you’ve been and how you’re doing. If I wanted to pull a real Mom Moon I’d start calling the LAPD, and area LA Hospitals to see if you’ve turned up. Cause it’s July 14th at 5am in Los Angeles, “Do you know where your Nikki Reed is?” Cause I sure as crap don’t.

So of course it got me thinking… where in the world could you be? And what are you doing? I checked IMDB and the only thing you have current is in pre-pro and that’s K-11 and we KNOW that ain’t filming right now and it might even be up in the air if you’re even still in it, especially if that whole KStew falling out rumor is true.

So then I checked to see if you have any fansites cause if anyone knows what’s up with Twi stars it’s their fans! Can I get an amen? And I find out no one’s updated in about a week. That isn’t good news. Then I hit Twitter, cause that’s all the latest and greatest and guess what all (read 2) fan twitters hadn’t updated in days either. Not even your FAKE twitter counterpart has cared enough to tweet about your fake goings on in over a week!

So it’s left me only a couple options as to where you’ve been…

  • You were driving to LAX one day, took and wrong turn and got lost in south central LA and were jumped into one of the local gangs… crips or bloods? I’d say crips cause you look better in blue than red. If this is true call us maybe we can initiate a trade off with the crips. You for Justin Chon or maybe they want someone beefier like Christian Serratos?
  • You’ve become a hermit spending all your time online at Nike.com designing more ridiculous neon high top sneakers than you know what to do with. My advice? Trash them all and get a nice pair of ballet flats.
  • This whole Oregano thing is true and you’ve chosen him over KStew. WOW if that’s true I really want the dish! Give me the gossip now! And so you two are hanging out at Cathy’s house, smoking up and worming your way into whatever movie she’s doing next. I wish I knew Cathy, I’d love to be an actress.

Take the cut to find out what Nikki’s REALLY been up to. TRUST it’s SOOO good!
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Another Jackson post… yet again

Dear Jacksper-

Since we didn’t get to rock out with you and that thing you call a band this week (Thanks for canceling by the way, whatever it’s not like UC and I are together every Tuesday my dear but anycrap…) We’re apparently going to OD on posts about you instead. See what you do to us? Please see us through this phase!

One of the great and sometimes embarrassing things about being a loud n proud Twilight fan is that people will send you links to everything Twi-related. Mostly it’s crap we’ve seen before, I mean we do run a Twilight/Rob blog after all, but still this means sometimes you get some real goodies that fall between the cracks. Like this little gem to the left here…

With all the hoopla surrounding Team Wolves and big reveal and Rob going into hiding and other crap we somehow missed this cuteness from Vancouver. And ain’t nothing like a little Jacksper and Ashley real life action. Cause this shiz is too cute for words. It’s like seeing Alice and Jasper in real life just out gettin’ coffee, ya know just another day in the neighborhood.

First off, tell Ashley since we’re now BFF’s to please share her boots, not the handbag. Kthanx.

Secondly, Jack ( hope you don’t mind if I call you Jack cause that’s what I’ve named your folder on my computer) this is re-donk-ulously adorable. Like in that you-look-like-a-high-school-crush-of-mine kinda way. Not so much the hat but the smile and the dimples. I just wanna poke my finger in one of them. Oh and the hair! Don’t cover it up! Have I ever told you about my curly hair fetish? People who know me well know I call it “the curly hair factor.” Chances are if you have curly or wavy hair I will be stupidly in love with you for no reason. Curly hair boys can do no wrong in my book. Now don’t use that to your advantage or tell Rob he needs to get a perm, cause his hair is wavy and perfs.

Ok, now that you know that will you please come back to LA and play with your ridiculous band so UC and I can rock out to some curly hair.

XO
Themoonisdown

PS ray bans, always the ray bans PLEASE!

PPS if you love us and you love Rob please vote for us at the Dazzle Awards! We’re up against some stiff competition and we’re currently in 4th place but I BELIEVE!!! We can do this people. IN OUR TIME! Now get over there and scroll down to best rob fansite and choose wisely!

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