Eclipse The Movie: Then & Now

Dear Eclipse DVD consumers,

So….Eclipse? Did you watch it? I am well-aware that Eclipse didn’t release this weekend everywhere in the world and that just sucks. Seriously, move to America. Not only do you not have Thanksgiving & you have to like soccer but you don’t even get movies at the same time we do! Not-Cool-rest of the world! (No really, stay in your country. I’m sure it’s great, I WISH more people liked soccer, and I’d really like to visit you in your country).

Anyway, I watched Eclipse at 9 pm Saturday night with @Brookelockart & pals. Let me set the scene: Fishtown Pennsylvania: I park under a bridge, think I’m gonna die but survive my 2 block walk to Brooke’s new house. I almost catch my scarf on fire making my world-famous stove-top popcorn, then I almost kill us with heart attacks using an entire ocean-filled with salt on my world-famous popcorn. Oops. But the time comes and we pop in the DVD (after figuring out how to use the DVD & watching Comcast On Demand Eclipse Extras in HD where Edward looks more like a dying ghost instead of a hot vampire because his make-up is so white). We watch the first 15 mintues. Then stop & re-start the first 15 minutes because some more people decided to join (semi-Twi virgins, which was HILARIOUS to experience with)

I’ll be honest, I wasn’t much looking forward to the movie. I don’t really know why- I just don’t think I was in a Twi-mood. But as soon as the drum kick sounded & the line “An innocent child in new orleans” sung by the Black Keys came through the TV speakers, I remembered…. and got the butterflies inside. It was interesting that I didn’t think about the 2nd time I saw the movie with my Philly Twi pals- no… it was the first Eclipse experience. I remember sitting next to Moon, squeezing her hand in anticipation.. and that first “Oh heyyyyyy” Moon said when Riley appeared on screen. Dang I forgot how hot that kid was but Oh Heyyyyy, Xavier, still!

(Oh, yes: You’re welcome)

But let’s recap what Moon & I thought about Eclipse almost 6 months ago when we penned you a letter at 4:30 am and see if our thoughts still stick. I just re-read Oh heyyyy we just saw Eclipse” and had a big chuckle. Which generally means it’s only funny to me! But overall, I thought or said out loud some of the exact same thoughts Saturday Night without remembering I had said them before. Here I thought I was being original when it turns out I was just ripping off myself from 6 months ago:

Original Thought: “Let’s talk about how we love Howard Shore for including the Sia & Metric songs throughout his score.”

Yes. I still love that. I haven’t listened to the Eclipse soundtrack for awhile (but New Moon has been playing daily in my office again!) so it all seemed new to me again! And when Edward was working Bella up only to let her down BIG TIME, I remembered the Sia song that was building up in the background- and then during the Leg hitch it explodes into beautifulness (the explosion is music beautifulness, much to Bella’s dismay) At which point I leaned over to Brookelockart and whispered “You know what? Edward could just go down on her & it would be fine. Win Win” Then we had a conversation entirely too inappropriate to share.

And DUDE where are all the Twilight fans with way too much time on their hands ripping these legit Eclipse scenes to You Tube for our viewing pleasure this weekend? Sorry for this crappy quality of an illegal video:

The score has always been lacking in my mind- Mr. Choice (a music composer himself) has always been a bit confused as to what exactly happened there- because we’re pretty sure that’s not the original score Howard Shore wrote- but the use of Metric & Sia throughout the entire theme is beautiful.

Original thoughtLet’s apologize to Edward for liking the Jacob & Bella kiss a litttttle bit too much”

Hmmmm….. I remember thinking even then that Taycob needs to calm down the head movements, but it was WAY distracting this time. I know for awhile there it seemed like I was riding the “Team Jacob” line, and I’m not sure where my head was, but I’m definitely back on Edward’s side. So I think I was just too pissed to enjoy Bella’s lucky day- with two boys who want her. PLUS the Twi-virgins we were with (who were ALL ABOUT Jacob- evidenced by the “oh shitttttss” that were moaned every time he appeared with his shirt off) REALLY couldn’t stand Bella’s wishy-washy-ness. Maybe it’s been so long since I’ve read the books & gotten so annoyed with Bella that I forgot. But I was reminded during that scene. And was thinking too strongly that “Bella’s a Bitch” to enjoy the kiss.

Original ThoughtLet’s get Jake some blotting tissues for that last scene when he looks like he’s dying of yellow fever.”

Dude! I already used that Yellow Fever joke!? I seriously thought the same thing Saturday night and planned to use it again today. I get it- he’s in pain- he’s sick- but dudeeeee. At least let Bella wipe him down a bit. I felt like I was looking at “The Situation” after he fell asleep in the tanning bed & stayed in for an hour or two too long (new joke- boom)

Original Thought
“Let’s put a call into L.A. Looks, and after thanking them for sponsoring Twilight with their donations of tubs of hair gel, ask them to move some of the allotted product for Taylor & pass it on to Rob to fix his floppy bangs.”

Move over L.A. Looks

I was getting a D.E.P. vibe Saturday night. And I think I was so happy to see Rob for an extended period of time without a big bushy beard & maintained sideburns (sorta) that I didn’t mind the floppy bangs! I’ll take what I can get!

Original ThoughtLet’s close our eyes and picture OURSELVES as Bella in a world where the guy on the bed is so hot that the gold brocade bedding he’s laying on doesn’t even matter.”

I mean…. can gold brocade ever not really matter? If Chuck Bass, Damon Salvatore & Edward Cullen wanted to have a foursome, but the condition was that it had to be on gold brocade bedding, I’d really try to convince them to pull out that air mattress they keep in the closet at the Salvatore mansion for when unexpected Vamp visitors swing by. Or see if we can borrow Rob Pattinson’s Hot Pocket Fort.

Original Thought “Let’s be grateful that most of the Bella/Edward getting-it-on scenes didn’t make us feel like we were watching Robsten preparing for an evening of licking cheese-whiz off each other”

I know! I mean, I’d say that none of the scenes made me feel that way this time. And I was worried- I mean, we’ve had Moantreal since Eclipse came out. But I got no Robsteny-vibes. I still think the Bella/Edward dialogue is semi-awkward with these long, drawn-out pauses in the beginning, but it picks up as it goes on.

Original thought
“Let’s talk about when we can burn down the jewelry store that created Bella’s engagement ring.”

THIS! Why have we not planned an LTT arson-day yet? I think one of the Twi-virgins’ exact words were “What the hell is that thing?
We don’t know, Twi virgin. It’s either a cheese grater for when they make “Italiano” or is a rock powerful enough to kill all the Cullen men with one blow. The jury is still out on that one.

And there is no original thought to accompany this one but JORTS!. I think it’s because I know that Stephenie mentions it in the commentary that I was looking out for how often they are worn, but DANG! They are EVERYWHERE. I like to think LTT can take some credit for that since we “Have much love for Jorts” or however Stephenie phrased it in the commentary (again- DUDE with the Twilight fans with a lot of extra time! Where is your screen shot transcription of the entire commentary!?) But sadly, no, we did not come up with the term. We have to thank the hipster neighborhoods both Moon & I reside in in Philadelphia & Los Angeles and the rednecks from which the hipsters stole their jorts-look.

All-in-all, my thoughts didn’t change much from my original viewing back in June. But I enjoyed this time around much more than expected. My only complaint is that they still weren’t able to figure out a way to keep Riley alive. Who cares about book to movie continuity? We want Xavier Samuel to stare at!!

Oh heyyyyy,
UnintnededChoice

What did you think? Did you watch the movie with some pals this weekend? Did you love it more or less than when you saw it months ago? Any new thoughts come to mind? Any new ah-ha moments or lines that were funny THIS time around!??

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125 Commented


David Slade turns 40 and STILL can’t believe he’s directing a teenage love story

Dear David Slade,

Happy 40th birthday!  Do you feel any different today? Any taller? What a great way to be celebrating your 40th birthday- directing a movie you said you’d rather be shot at gun point than SEE, let alone direct.

sladebday

One day I’ll be “this tall”

We hope that you have the bestest of 40th birthdays. We hope Cathy the Cougar leaves you alone today and stops calling to tell you she just wants to “pinch your widdle cheeks & give you a widdle hug.” We hope Jackson & the 100 monkeys write an impromptu song just for you about birthdays, vampires & a little angry British man. We hope you’re showered today with LOTS of twilight-themed gifts as the cast & crew poke fun of how you once said you hated Twilight and now how you’re getting paid by directing it. We hope Tom Cruise calls you with his secret tips on looking taller, and we really really hope there’s a leg hitch in Eclipse (or else).

I have to be honest. Moon & I completely forgot your birthday. It’s to be expected since I never think about you and up until this week was still calling you “David Spade.” But thankfully we have readers who keep “David Slade” calenders and stuff and remind us of such important dates. That blessed reader, today, was TeamSeth (who would like to add this: “I wanted to clear up that while I go by TeamSeth, I’m not a pedophile and do not find BooBoo attractive. I mean he’s cute for like my ten year old brother (what is he 14? 15?), but um, he’s also you know, a decade younger than me.  Does he not scream Jonas Brothers and Bop Magazine?  Yick.”)

Since we don’t talk about you much, I wanted to share some tidbits about you for our readers.
Fun Facts about David Spade:

  • Suffers from hypoglycemia.
  • Has been commercial spokesman for Sierra Mist soda and Capital One credit cards.
  • He was so smart in 3rd grade he got moved up to the 4th grade for some of his classes.
  • Was one of the guests at Lindsay Lohan’s 19th birthday party. (don’t tell Cathy the Cougar)

Since I’m an idiot, TeamSeth did some light google research for us about David Slade to help celebrate your birthday:
Fun Facts about David Slade:

  • David is known for his non-stop camera movement and shooting in dim lit settings.
  • He has a dachshund named Django (that is almost as big as he is)
  • 95%* of the David Slade pictures on Google’s Image Search are him giving off the “two-fingered salute”, the British version of the infamous middle finger.
  • He, on Sept 21, 2009, tweeted this enlightening quote on filmmaking, “When the vampires sparkle we need to use a special camera filter to expose it on film. Otherwise the film over exposes.”

Yeah… there’s not much. Remind me to write your biography. It’s sure to be a bestseller and I could use an extra 30-40 bucks.

Learn much more about David Slade on his birthday thanks to TeamSeth’s brilliant comments after the jump! Continue…

73 Commented


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