Kristen Stewart is a piece of (art) work!

This is real. And it's a thing.

Dear Kristen,

So this art show called “Muchos KStew” a “tribute” to Kristen Stewart  is opening this Saturday in LA. Oh don’t you worry we will BE there. Not opening night because I have stuff called work and a life (not really) but White Yorkie and I already have a date on the calendar to hit up Muchos KStew and maybe bring a video camera or something… you never know.

From the synopsis on the website I KNOW we’re in for a treat Krisbians and non-Krisbians alike will enjoy, I mean this really says it all, doesn’t it:

“Immerse yourself in the atmosphere of a mysterious young woman and stare at her face until it all makes sense. 

Witness a bounty of images that are sure to haunt and delight and confuse you forever…” 

White Yorkie may have to drag me away because I’ll be staring till the gallery closes hoping it all makes sense… and it won’t. Ever. ANYWAY this is a heads up to let you know we DEFINITELY have not forgotten you or Twilight and we will DEFINITELY be at Muchos KStew. LITRALLY you couldn’t keep us away from this train wreck.

Since we weren’t asked to contribute some “art work” to the show (RUDE!) I’d like to show you some of the pieces I would have chosen for this special collection…

Last but not least…

We may or may not bring a video camera… and by may not I mean we are. Prepare yourself.

It’s things like this that make me LOVE the fandom,
Themoonisdown

PS OMG I’m not dead!!! (Barely).

Is anyone in LA going to this? Anything you want us to do while there?

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26 Commented


The worst part about the end of the Holidays (and a Monday Funny)

Been away for the holiday and LTT for a few weeks? Remember there are auto-playing ads that you can STOP from annoying you by hitting mute/the volume button once, after which you’ll never hear them again

Dear Twilight,

Mr. Choice is a better Twilight blogger than me (click this)

Do you know what the worst part about the end of the holidays is? No longer having an excuse to not be productive. (Coming in at a close second is: Sobering Up after 3 weeks of being constantly tispy; The cookies are all stale; Accepting the fact that eating 8 cookies at day for 3 weeks made you fat; Having to stand in long lines to return the horrific gifts you were given; The month old Christmas Tree causes bleeding when you attempt to drag it down 4 sets of stairs to the trash; Having to clean & reorganize your closet now that you have extra things to put in them; You feel really guilty about throwing out your friends & families cute (and over priced) cards/pictures of their kids)

And boy did I EVER enjoy that excuse this holiday! Don’t get me wrong, I was SUPER productive- I have to be with a job that depends on me [gotta sell those hot tubs y’all!] plus a part time job that has quickly taken up more and more of my time & attention. But if something didn’t have to get done this past month, like I’d still get paid (or not paid) if it didn’t happen, or no one would die or get sick or be sad or kill me, then I didn’t do it. I embraced the “It’s the Holidays” excuse BIG TIME and just STOPPED doing things that needed to get done.

Yes, Twilight, that includes you. I don’t even remember tweeting “Merry Christmas” “Happy Hanukkah” or “Happy New Years” this year. Even Mr. CHOICE tweeted you all a Happy New Years message! And I’d like to tell you that today, on January 1, 2012, as I’m writing this, things are going to be different. I’m starting 2012 off RIGHT and with a BANG with some new/amazing/awesome/EPIC* news or blog post, but I’m not. I barely even have an excuse because despite finishing off a bottle of wine plus 1/2 bottle of champagne last night, I feel fine today. I was even up for brunch at 9am. And while I technically could say “It’s the Holidays” because it is January 1st, and all, and I don’t have off tomorrow like the rest of the world, the reality is I’m just being lazy & want to get in my PJs early & watch a movie/TV/peruse blogs that didn’t use the “holiday” excuse/pin things on pinterest/eat more cookies/play with my cats/fall asleep <—- any of those excuses work.

I will leave you, however, with a small Monday Funny that was sent to us by LTT reader, Lindsay, who came across this news item that included a picture of a girl who can only be Kristen Stewart’s inbred cousin:

kristen Stewart inbred cousin

Although attacking a man with a bowl of spaghetti totally sounds like something that could have happened between Kristen & Rob or any one of the Britpack guys, really, during a drunken New Years Eve.

Happy New Year. I promise to be a good blogger soon (as soon as I don’t think of another excuse)

xo,
UnintendedChoice

*crap… I totally promised myself I wasn’t saying EPIC in 2012. Already failed. UGH

Our internet game is ridiculous: LTR, The Forum, Twitter, The Store

31 Commented


Take out your party hats, it’s LTT’s 3rd Anniversary!

There are no videos in the post, so you can just mute your computer today! HOORAY!

Dear Unintendedchoice, Themoonisdown and LTTers,

Never trust a girl with crazy eyes, nor let her blog

I know what you must be thinking: who let Brookelockart get control of the blog? After deciding that I wanted to throw a surprise blog party, I spent the last two weeks cracking passwords (hint: has to do with Robsten, magicness and Bella’s birthday). So folks, spike your coffee and raise a glass to three fabulous years of laughter, tears and images that will never leave you (two words: Snail Penis).

As part of the anniversary surprise, I reached out to regulars and some old time friends who jumped at the chance to reminisce about our favorite LTT posts (I may have also promised some punch and pie.)

Please introduce yourselves and when did you start reading LTT/LTR?

Read_or_sleep: Summer 2009
Cazza: March 2009
PlaneFriend: Reading Since: About 5 seconds after this post. When I saw Stephenie was going to have fansites interview her, I decided to go looking at the fansites. All the others I just glanced at, read a page or two, and never went back to again. Within days, I was reading most of the LTT backlogs…realized I knew UC a few weeks later, started writing for y’all occasionally, and the rest in history.
Stacey: March 2010
LonestarKendall: March 2009
Rachel B, formerly GriffsSayWhat: Winter 2009
Alice_NaA  – Bella_NaA : A  long long time ago, when palatial pads and hot pocket fortresses where yet to be built, Summit was not to blame, TomStu still shaved, Bobbygee shared his wisdom, AmanDUH  was working her living room corners, the Pattinson pants were in style, and Oregano was not just an Italian herb.
superhumanmoron: January 2009
MrsKowski: I’ve been reading since March of 2009. The post that started it all for me was the “This is how you found us? Vol. 2”  it was linked on NewMoonMovie.org – my world has not been the same since I made the decision to click on that link.
Snowwhitedrifted: January 2010
Janetrigs: February 2009
Allryans: April 2009, actually since THIS post.
Operarose: August 2009
TeamSeth: September 16, 2009

Well, I guess this is what happens with an open ended question. For the record, I’ve been reading since March 2009.

We know that LTT gave laugh lines to Stephenie Meyer, what posts made you screen spray your drink while reading?

worse when it comes out your nose

PlaneFriend: I laughed so hard while reading this post that I flatout cried, no joke. I mean, Barbies in lingerie? Blacking out a Barbie’s girl parts? Flipping hilarious.
Stacey: This is an old one, but one of the first that I read that made me laugh so hard that it woke up the baby I was nursing at 2 A.M and made him start crying. So while that won’t help me win mother of the year, that post did bring some fun at actually being awake at 2 A.M.
Rachel B: I really loved seeing all the funny stuff people thought up for this contest, even though I was not creative enough to think of anything!  And, at the time the “imma let you finish” was ALL the rage!!
Bella_NaA: Oooh, the Imma-contest. Endless fun we had with that one. There were some really, REALLY good entries, including the one that Gil Birmingham ended up tweeting about!
Mrskowski: I think a memorable screen spray post was the “Ok …we gotta discuss it …it’s time” post – can you believe I’d never seen Last Tango in Paris before this post? …I could have probably answered this same question with any LTT Mailbag post or any My Twilight Confessions post as well – I die at all of them.
SWD: Breaking dawn Barbies
Janetrigs: The epic Calliope (@CalliopeBlabs) , UC and Moon Break Down of the New Moon trailer and we learned that Tweed is indeed Serious.
Operarose: Any of the posts with responses to letters LTT received from Twi fans who thought to the cast or Stephenie. I love the equal parts biting sarcasm, snark and sometimes sweetness involved in UC & Moon’s responses to the rather confused fans. Example

Cry Baby

Those certainly bring back lots of memories, also some inappropriate laughing at work. On the flip side, which post made you cry more than Eric Yorkie in New Moon?

Read_or_sleep: I have nothing coming up from memory.  Obviously I am a cruel, heartless person.
PlaneFriend: This post because I want to read a Leah sequel THAT badly. Truly, I have a ridiculous affinity for Leah. I want to get inside her head. I want to see her puke over the pedophile Jake-Nessie imprinting. I want her to fall for someone other than Sam!
Lonestarkendall: Just another example of how Twi brought us LTT/LTRs together across the country, supporting one another and making us laugh.
Alice_NaA: Don’t remember the exact post, but at the time of our twidiction high, every post reminding us that the twilight-period will come to an end, made us sad.
Bella_NaA: And now, every post that reminds us how LTT has become so much more than a funny blog about Twilight but also a place where we have made new friends!
SHM: I can’t think of one in particular.  Usually the ones that talk about all the friendships made through LTT.  And we all sing “Friends are Friends Forever”.
MrsKowski: it’s a toss up between “Twilight Moments that have shaped us” and about Leghitch2010
SWD: Well, this one was emotional for me, because I did the shirts. It’s AWESOME to see them on you all!!
Janetrigs: Freya describes how we all feel, in that LTR/LTT has brought us all together as friends.
Operarose: MidnightCyn’s story. Probably one of the most unforgettable stories I’ve ever read, anywhere, period. I was so inspired that Twilight helped distract her from a difficult time in her life.
TeamSeth: Same post as above.  This is one of the first posts I read, and I thought every Thursday was a tear jerker (due to post title). Luckily that wasn’t the case, but this will always be the most teardrops are fallin’ down my cheek post and same goes for its comments. But what makes it even more tear-jerker to look back on is that Cyndi DID go see New Moon, even though she didn’t think it was a possibility.

Continue…

47 Commented


Nikki Reed invites me to write a story with her

Let's write a TOTALLY FICTIONAL story together!!

Dear Nikki Reed,

When you (or Seventeen Magazine, whatever… pesky details!) invited me to write a story with you I just KNEW I had to… I mean we all know I’m no stranger to writing FanFic.*** Not to toot my own horn but I think we all remember the Palatial Pad fic rather well. The rules state that we would write alternating chapters with you writing the first one and back and forth from there. After reading your first chapter I knew EXACTLY where this was headed, I MEAN COME OOOONNNN!!! This is essentially your ALLEGED life story circa Twilight and New Moon. So trust me when I say… I GOT THIS!

Ok, so everyone go read Nikki’s Chapter first

A lexicon for your reading…
He = Rob Pattinson
Friends = cast mates
School = film set / real life
Lunch Room = the fabled hotel room jam sessions in Portland

… I knew I loved him, and that’s all that mattered. Sure I wasn’t the prettiest girl in the world, but he always said he liked me for that very reason, so I felt content with that. Most of the time that is. One time, I gathered the courage to sing a song in front of him in the lunch room (I had always loved singing), and he laughed and said “…that’s what’s so great about you; even though you aren’t a good singer, you’re not afraid to try.” That’s a compliment right?

This stuff is SO awkward to look at now

My Chapter-
As his words sunk in I hit him back with “That’s what’s so great about you Rob, even though you aren’t very charming, you’re not afraid to mumble your way to the top.” It had seemed mean spirited at the time especially when the entire lunch room laughed along with him including my best friend Christine. But that’s not how your bestie is supposed to treat you, right? After all she became homecoming queen because her boyfriend knew the principal who counted the ballots because of ME, she was my aunt! Christine never would have known her if not for me. What was also perplexing was Christine’s sudden interest in my secret boyfriend while she had her own and knew how much I was in love with him even though we had decided to keep it private. Oh, she was good at playing the innocent role luring him in with blinking doe eyes and stumbling over her words around him… or anyone really.

One day he finally noticed her. I could tell because he tried to use his charms and tell her stories and she quickly fell for it and all our class mates began to whisper and asked me questions… What was going on?

Oh Christine!

I couldn’t take it anymore I had to let her know this wasn’t alright. So one day while she was delivering her speech on equal rights for all couples and the legalization of pot in speech class, I’d had enough. Sure, I caused a scene and made our teachers and fellow classmates uncomfortable and it definitely alienated him because I was no longer alright with their facade of privacy. It was time I finally shouted it from the rooftops… or at least my desk. Everyone knows!

Oh, Nikki I can’t wait to see where you take this next chapter. And no, I really don’t think you care about this crap anymore cause you’re happily married and writing songs and being nice to us sites/blogs at the premiere but I defs think you should have gone with a different storyline because this just gives the crazies ammo against you and we all know they don’t need more.

Until the next chapter.. to be continued!
Themoonisdown

PS You can actually enter this contest! Someone go do it and WIN!!

**I have NEVER written fanfic… unless it was for this blog. Though I totally enjoyed every minute***
*** I didn’t ****
****I did.

Source: Seventeen Mag via JodieO

Our internet game is ridiculous: LTR, The Forum, Twitter, The Store

37 Commented


We saw Breaking Dawn and we are Fade to Sad-isfieid

*REMINDER: You can mute the sound from the ads on the sidebar AND at the bottom of the page. They will stay muted forever. YAY! Now read in blessed silence*

**BREAKING DAWN REVIEW COMPLETE WITH SPOILERS DUH!!! DON’T READ IF YOU HAVEN’T SEEN BD AND DON’T WANT TO BE SPOILED!**

Forever is only the beginning

Dear Breaking Dawn,

Remember when we said Eclipse was a real movie last July? Well we hadn’t seen you yet. That’s right, just like fine wine and George Clooney, Twilight keeps getting better with age. And with age comes wisdom… here’s what we’ve learned from Breaking Dawn

Things we learned from Breaking Dawn:

  • If we hold hands in public it’s for two reasons: we are either 2nd hand embarrassed at all the Robsten fans squeeling at any kiss/hand hold/dadward/sex scene or we were genuinely scared or grossed out. Cause that happens in this. BD is NOT for the faint of heart.
  • Forget Bella, Edward and Jacob the REAL love triangle of Breaking Dawn is Sue, Charlie and Billy. Cause for realzzzz yall something is going on with the parents. Breaking Dawn has something for every age… There’s still hope after 40!
  • Becoming a vampire means instant boob job, shiny shiny Ashley Greene type hair and a permanent smoky eye. Oh and not to mention the blood red crazy eyes. You think someone will ask for this on Dr. 90210 next season?
  • Twilight movies can be funny for the RIGHT reasons no longer are Bella and Edward going on a drug trip in the Pacific ocean or slow-mo forest running in Anne of Avonlea clothes, there are moments like the wedding toasts which make you LOL because it’s really funny or when BooBoo Stewart and Taylor Lautner have actual funny Big Brother/Little Brother interaction.

His name's BooBoo... yea I know I don't get it either

  • Speaking of BooBoo Stewart, he had more lines in Breaking Dawn than Kellan has had in all the Twilight movies combined. And his name is BOOBOO. Time to get a new agent Kellan.
  • The CGI team used to create the wolfpack earned overtime concealing Kristen’s buttcrack because her gorgeous dress was cut so low in the back. Who knew butt cleavage would be the new IT thing in wedding fashions? Thanks Carolina!
    .
  • Give Jackson ANY word it doesn’t matter he will throw that faux Texas accent on it and add the Elvis lip curl and make it into a one word stand up comedy routine. We’re still trying to figure out if this is an intentional choice by him or just dumb luck.

Peter sucks at Rock, Paper, Scissors

  • Someone will ALWAYS get shafted and be wearing some sort of heinous wig on their head. Unfortunately, Peter Facinelli drew the short straw this time and to make matters worse, I’m pretty sure his hair line changed in every scene as if the bleached dead animal on his head was taking it last gasps of air before it gave in to it’s inevitable future: lying on top of Mike Dexter’s head.
  • Taylor deserves an award for making the imprinting scene less creepy than we thought it would come off and thank you Bill for showing Renesmee as an adult so everyone else would get it and Chris Hansen could stop hiding in the movie theater broom closet and sit down and enjoy the movie like the rest of us.

Can you not read my lips?! LISTEN CAREFULLY!!

  • Wolves fighting with each other via mind reading is confusing and weird for people not in the know maybe they could have had a fist fight on First Beach or an angry G-chat session instead so I didn’t have to explain what was going on to the super confused couple next to me.
  • Housekeepers in Brazil are super rude and stare a lot… especially when they think their employer is a blood sucking demon. However, the blood sucking demon offers great benefits and a 401k so they keep their mouths shut and keep bringing the eggs.
  • Critics may pan you and haters may hate but ya know what? This ain’t for them. They don’t KNOW Bella and Edward like we do, they aren’t invested like we are. These movies are for us… and the boyfriends and unicorns we drag along with us.
  • The heardboard scene still makes me laugh. HARD.

Babe, let's sleep in tomorrow and go to the 2nd service

  • You know what makes losing your virginity to a preternaturally strong vampire better? Losing it while a song fit for the contemporary service on a Sunday morning plays in the background! For reals though, best song and best scene. Sleeping at Last gets a big HALE YES from us.
  • Speaking of Breaking Hymen, REALLY Bella losing your virginity to a 107 year old virgin was the best night of your life? Maybe the best 50 seconds of your life. Or maybe you’ve got your rose colored glasses on and are romanticizing it a bit.

We do have to say though: Stephenie, thank you (from the bottom of our easily 2nd hand embarassed hearts) for stepping in and not letting them make a Robsten Porno out of the honeymoon sex scenes. THANK YOU!!! It was just right, not too much and not too little… it was perfectly executed so consider us fade to sad-isfied!

Really we loved it… and can’t wait to see it again (and again… and probably again with 10 other people) and then we’ll do some more in depth reviews.

GO SEE BREAKING DAWN! NOW!
Moon & UC

PS See more Breaking Dawn Black Carpet coverage at LTR today! I get Rob-blocked by a certain someone!

PPS Go visit VH1’s Fablife to see yours truly featured as their Super Fans! And Comment!!!

So did you see it?!  WHAT DID YOU THINK!? Favorite scene? Any laughable moments?

Our internet game is ridiculous: LTR, The Forum, Twitter, The Store

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