R-E-S-P-E-C-T, find out what it means to Rob and Twilight!

Dear Twi-Hards and LTT-ers –

A lot’s been said since yesterday about “Cab-gate 09″… which is what I’m now refering to the Rob was tapped by a cab incident that turned into the biggest non newstory, newstory to rock the Twi-world in… well… days. In a matter of minutes rumors were swirling, petitions were being signing, kidneys being donated and Obama issuing a statement. Well maybe it didn’t go that far, but folks did start up various campaigns and trending topics to get the word out about everything from: “Respect Rob’s Space” to “Protect Rob” which is all fine and well because crazies need to keep their distance from Rob.

But what really got me thinking was what about the other folks in the Twi-dom? What about the other actors? Their family? Their friends? Can we ask people to respect Rob but leave them out? Must we be forced to worry that Solomon Trimble will get mobbed at an Oregon Walmart while he’s buying some Alberto VO5 hot oil treatments for his luscious locks?!

NO! I simply will not stand for it! I MUST know that ALL people associated with Twilight are also respected. So to jump on the bandwagon I’ve created our very own LTT “Respect” campaign with an LTT twist, of course!

Won’t you join us?

Themoonisdown

respectcabbie
It’s easy to worry about Rob since he’s such a big celeb, but what about the “little people” in this scenario? What about the Cabbie? I say we need to respect the cabbie! Stop stepping out into the street with your big feet, umbrellas and security detail. This guy’s just trying to do his job ferrying people around the city and we’re getting in his way by hitting HIS cab with our hips. Respect the cabbie!

respectbuttcrack
Though Buttcrack Santa isn’t a canon character from the Twilight series, HE DIED! Respect him! He died for our laughs. He died for those little bottles. He died to have momma say didn’t know how to make a kitty meow! RESPECT BUTTCRACK SANTA!

respectbananager
What about Marty the Bananager for 100 Monkeys? We give him cheesy shirts to wear, don’t include him on our 100 Monkeys canvas totes, and grind with him on the dance floor. He’s a person too! Give Marty his personal space and save your sexy moves for his bandmates. They signed up for this, Marty is just doing his job and can’t be distracted by our beauty. Respect The Bananager!

respectbigdaddy
Taylor’s a level-headed 17 year old who seems to be enjoying the attention he’s getting by playing Jacob. My real concerns lie with Big Daddy Lautner. How’s he taking the fame? Is he still able to hit the McDee’s drive through at midnight for a late night Filet o Fish without getting mobbed? Respect Big Daddy!

respectmike
We all spend a lot of time pining for Rob and swooning over Kellan’s wifebeaters but what about the supporting actors? Have we devoted as much time to Mike Newton? Will we ever love his “golden retriever” like qualities enough to finally open letterstomikenewton.com? Will we ever post about his quest to save ladies boobs? Respect Mike Welch!

Read about the best real life Rob stalker and see the Rob’s new security at LTR
RESPECT The Forum!

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Taylor Lautner at a hockey game in 4 takes…

Dear Taylor-

I had a great weekend, saw some friends, went to some house parties, got a fathers day gift (don’t forget Big Daddy Lautner this Sunday!) and wondered what you were up to now that New Moon wrapped principle photography… and lucky me Just Jared found you at a Detroit Red Wings hockey game! I totally forgot you were from the North because who else watches hockey around here? You and Big Daddy Lautner (my other name for Poppa Filet o Fish) did not disappoint with your AMAZING facial expressions during that game that were all caught on film for folks like UC and I to enjoy… and enjoy them we did!

taylorhockey01
Taylor: OH DUDE DAD!! That cougar behind me just grabbed my balls in the hall and I liked it!!
Big Daddy: Isn’t that a Katy Perry song?
Taylor: Um Yea, something like that, I don’t know Dad but she pushed me into the guys bathroom and told me she’d “make me a man” for Rob’s phone number, can you believe it?! I was like get in line sister!
Big Daddy: Hmmmph… kids these days… freakin 6 pack abs and mystic tans are wasted on the youth… I wonder if they have a McDee’s in this arena. Taylor go get me a McFlurry!

taylorhockey03
Taylor: Daaaadd… I just remembered Selena broke up with me. I’m really sad… do you have a kleenex?
Big Daddy: Uh, I got this leftover napkin from Wendy’s, will that do?
Taylor: sniff… sniff… yeaaaa but who will I walk in the rain with now? What about the umbrella I bought? Who will I give chaste sweet hugs to on the sidewalk in front of the papparazzi?
Big Daddy: Consider it a blessing she dumped you now Son. She’s a Disney girl, it would have taken 2 years to get to first base and then it would have ended in sorrow after the inevitable dirty webcam pics surfaced. Do you want some cotton candy?

Follow the cut to see if Big Daddy tackles a Dippin Dots vender…
Continue…

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Working out with a Filet o Fish and Taylor Lautner

(TGIF LTT-ers!! I can’t tell you how happy I am we’ve made it to another Friday, so in honor of a great week of posts and a crappy week of work I’m bringing you one of the most ridiculous videos EVER!)

Dear Daddy Lautner –

What the heck is going on in this video? Was it time for Taylor to work out and that’s why you pulled over the SUV for a little impromptu weight training session?

“Hey Taylor and Trainer guy, pop the hatch you’ve got some reps to do kid, these filet o fishes ain’t buying themselves!”

And what’s the loud popping noise in the background? If I didn’t know better about the premise of New Moon I’d say you were on the set of “Saving Private Rob” and those are fake gun rounds going off… instead of what we all know that sound really is! It’s you crushing beer cans on your forehead while Taylor works the Delts out.

What we really need is a Daddy Lautner work out video… it’s pretty much like those old people chair work outs only yours involved a lawn chair and lifting 40’s instead of soup cans. Then to really get the muscles warmed up there’s a relay between you and that blond chick to see who can eat a McRib the fastest. You win of course! And the cover is the best… I picture Taylor standing over your shoulder spotting you as you benchpress a platter of McGriddles. GOLD, I tell you! You’re rich all thanks to me! Where’s the Amazon preorder?

Nice form Taylor!
Themoonisdown

Oh and get Taylor another Crest White Strip, I couldn’t see his gleaming chompers from space!

PS TGIF!!!!!!!!!! Time to hit that forum and get to chatting after commenting!

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One picture, two takes… Filet-o-Fish Edition

taylorsdadlax(*moon note- i found this pic and sent over to UC because we think this is taylor’s dad and we KNEW we had to hit it with a ‘one picture, two takes’*)

Take One – UnintendedChoice

Dear Taylor,

If this is the future you, I’m gonna have to re-think giving you my sister, Wolfgirl, to be your girlfriend.

Love,

UnintendedChoice

a

taylorsdadlaxTake Two – Themoonisdown

Dear Taylor’s Dad –

I love that you eat McDonalds while Taylor is working out.

Bear hugs and Big Macs,
Themoonisdown

PS I <3 you taylors dad! seriously, you are my new love affair. don’t run!

Pic from the Gossip Girls. Check out the creepy bio pic of Taylor!

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