So I’m a superfan…

Dear LTTers,

I mentioned yesterday that I’m going to be 2nd-hand embarrassing you all today (Saturday) in Philadelphia for the MovieFone Twilight Night featuring Jackson Rathbone & some wolf (his name is Bronson- is he the one that says “Burn?”) I can’t really talk about what I DO know (which isn’t much) but I am allowed to tell you this, which I promise will be the most embarassing thing you’ll ever hear me say:

I am the Twilight SUPERFAN

of the Philly event.

Ever since I heard about it I’ve been having nightmares about what MIGHT happen. I mean, are they going to CALL me a “SUPERFAN” in PUBLIC? Do I have to yell out which Team I’m on immediately after they say I am the biggest fan of all time? What if I accidentally say “TEAM BIG DADDY?” Since I really have no idea what this event is gonna be like, I came up with some potential things I could see moviefone, in conjunction with Summit, wanting their SUPERFAN to perform:

  • Participate in a Face off with a 12 year old- WHO IS THE BIGGEST FAN where I want to win, because of COURSE I’m a bigger fan than she is, but also don’t want to because the prize is a Jacob Black doll. And they want the winner to make out with it.
  • SUPERFAN Twilight Trivia- What if I know all the answers? Should I pretend I’m stumped by a few so I don’t look like a major dork?
  • What if they force a Burger King crown on my head? Will I ever live that down while my friends look on? And more importantly, will Big Daddy even want to meet me after he hears I  supported the BK?
  • What if there’s a tshirt making contest.  Once they see me hold a puffy paint stick, I know they’ll quickly give the artsy part to a 15 year old, but what if I have to MODEL all the entries? Walk down a stage, strutting my SUPERFAN self while I wear a white Hanes T that says “TEAM PATTESTON?”
  • What if I have to talk to Jackson & he asks me what my favorite 100 Monkey’s song is ?
  • Will they bring this girl on stage assuming we’d be bff’s? And present her as a gift? Can I laugh?

She's a SUPERFAN- like me

  • What if I have to sing a 100 Monkeys song without crying?
  • Will I have to say 5  facts about Bronson Pelletier or else they throw a sippie cup full of blood on me?
  • What if they pull 3 dark-skinned guys on stage and make me pick out which one Bronson is?

Don’t worry- I won’t be sporting a SINGLE Twilight accessory or piece of Twilight clothing- well, I will have my Forks, WA rape whistle that @brookelockart gave me as a moving gift last week since I moved near the ghetto. And the ONLY way that’s coming out of my purse is if I get so nervous before hand that I run to the closest bar (like 12 feet from the event) and down a couple shots. Then we might hear my whistle blowing while I yell, “I’M YOUR SUPERFAN BITCHES” and flash all the poor 13 year olds, just there to find out who the hell Bronson Pelletier is and what he has to do with Twilight.

Make sure you follow us on Twitter as I’ll try to tweet from the Wolf, Vampire, SUPERFAN limbo line, or something

Doing my best to not 2nd-hand embarrass anyone,
UnintendedChoice

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