A love hate relationship with Summit

I’m back from vacation- Moon is now in Switzerland for a few days- her last stop before returning HOME to ME (well, back to L.A. but only 2,500 miles from me) but I’m still on this little “blog break” mostly because I can’t really function until Moon is home to discuss THIS with me OMG! Don’t worry- I found a REALLY OLD letter submitted last year (see I really do hang on to them all!) that I should have posted. Oh plus a video- so don’t miss that below!

Dear Summit,

I have a love-hate relationship with you. I’m getting worried that it is going to turn into a hate-hate relationship sooner rather than later. Why is this so, you ask? Is it because you replaced my beloved Victoria with Opie’s daughter for New Moon? Could it be all those rumors, once circulating but now thankfully resolved, that it might happen again with Emmett and Alice? Eh, maybe. I think my real problem with our relationship is that you aren’t enough of a tease (I know, I know, stick with me here).

Think back with me to pre-November 2008. I was a senior in college and psyched out of my mind to be going to a midnight premiere in my little college town for Twilight. Fast forward to pre-November 2009. The small little college town theater was now showcasing New Moon on all 12 of its screens, tickets were available two weeks before the midnight show, and Nordstrom had an entire clothing line devoted to this phenom. What happened in that one year span of time? Oh, right. You sold out to that dirty little tramp we all like to call: mainstream media.

Just when I thought I might be able to keep a nerdy little obsession between myself and a few close friends, you blew the lid of my secret like Big Daddy losing the brown paper bag he was using to try to hide his Filet-o-Fish from Taylor in. The only thing I can think of to bring on the sudden onslaught of fans is the fact that you refused to heed our advice and wear your purity ring at all times. Because of this, I’m pretty sure I saw half of New Moon & Eclipse before they were out. What is that about? I understand your need to “sell tickets”, but come on! Seriously? That 10 second teaser of Edward and Bella kissing was enough to keep me drooling for more! And now, it seems, you are about to do that very same thing to me with Breaking Dawn. It started out small. Just a trailer here and there. A still shot from the set. A tweet from our resident little person. But now that everyone’s starting to run the promotion gamut, it seems like there is something new to watch every time I log in to LTT. That is just not cool. I know there are those out there who are probably going to disagree with me and give me crap for this, but I really just want to experience that cinematic magic that is slowly but surely being choked to death by the desire to make money. Believe me, I understand the desire to make and/or have money (anyone else jobless out there? Holla!), but could you, just once, think about those of us who want a little surprise in our lives and not give us 50 trailers, 500 interviews, and 1000 set stills to choose from? I’ve already seen every trailer, clip, still shot, and interview out there and I’m pretty sure I’m gonna be good with those till November. So, please, for the sake of all that is good and right in the world, save a me a little somethin’ somethin’ to look forward to (TWSS). Thank you. *steps down off soapbox*


Oh Sarah…. I know how you feel. I’ve had the rants, myself & am doing my best to say “pure” even though Summit & the rest of the Media CLEARLY doesn’t want me to. I need SOMETHING to look forward to in November- I want my Breaking Dawn experience to be like my first Twilight viewing- SO new!!!

But until then…. I’ll watch fan-made videos because we all know they are so much better than anything the professionals release!!

Our internet game is ridiculous: LTR, The Forum, Twitter, The Store

46 Commented

Open Weekend Post: Um, Duh Summit

Dear Summit,

I’d like to draw our reader’s attention to today’s “What the F*ck Moment” courtesy of YOU (yet again)

Seriously? First of all everyone claims they sell “Bella’s Jacket” including my very favorite modcloth.com (which sold out QUICKLY back in 2006- or maybe it was 2009- whatever. FOREVER ago)  MAYBE this is the ‘real’ Bella’s jacket & maybe they shouldn’t be claiming connection to Twilight without permission, but dude. Seriously? Do you guys not have anything better to do other than sue people? You sued a fan (Delaneyg84 on Twitter for those of you in the dark (aka lucky) who loves Robsten & leaked Eclipse stills before anyone else did), you sued someone who took a video camera into a theater & got a shitty capture of PART of New Moon for her digital scrapbook. What’s next?

I figured I’d take the liberty of helping you out with some ideas of who to sue:

  • Olive Garden- for making such delicious breadsticks that Big Daddy, and therefore Taylor, can’t resist. Free advertising for them due to your Golden Boy!
  • All restaurants in New Orleans for using Fish Fry. Harry did NOT okay that
  • The estate of Kurt Kobain for all the flannel he wore in the 90s
  • Bears. Everywhere. Cause they should be wolves. Bella said.
  • Hipsters with mustaches- they didn’t get Charlie’s permission.
  • People holding apples in supermarkets. They don’t have the license to do that- the hand model is the only one allowed.
  • Vampire Diaries- do I have to explain? Vampires? Love story? Love triangle? Twilight did it forty millionth first
  • Spider-monkeys
  • God for not getting permission before the partial lunar Eclipse last Saturday
  • Moon & I for all our wise cracks over the years. BRING.IT.ON. Imagine all the letter possibilities!

That should get you started! Happy suing random people!


Who ELSE should Summit sue!??

Our internet game is ridiculous: LTR, The Forum, Twitter, The Store

93 Commented

Storytime with Moon: I went to EclipseCon this weekend, what’d you do?

Dear LTT-ers,

I can honestly say I never thought I’d end up at a Twicon in my lifetime but I’ve thought a lot of things previously: I thought I’d never run a fansite/blog, I’d never create something where the words porn/peen/jorts/hot pocket were used as much as words like “the” and “and” and I never thought I’d walk into a Hot Topic on a simi-regular basis but well, we all know how this turned out. So upon hearing the cast (the trinity!) who would be there, I couldn’t ignore their siren call. So that’s how I ended up at the Eclipse Conference in Los Angeles and I was going to make the best of it! Here’s how it went down…

Whoever’s creating these events must think we’re all 100 year old farmers who get up at dawn because the very first panel was The Cullen Family at 10AM!!!!!!!!!! WTF?! How was I supposed to get all beautified for the day and over to Culver City on a Saturday morning AND get my beauty rest? Because if you know one thing about me readers, know this: I LOVE to sleep. Ask anyone, it’s true. But I hauled ass over there and skated into the biggest hotel ballroom I’ve ever seen before just as the Cullen’s were starting…

They answered some questions I don’t quite remember since they weren’t all that fascinating (this would become a theme for the day). Either Twilight fans want to hear the same ol boring questions over and over again or Creation Entertainment weeds out the good shiz like “Jackson, do you really think 100 Monkeys plays good music? Because we think it might just be a HUGE joke you’re playing on the fandom. Inquiring minds want to know, Moon row triple X.”

I mostly spent my time imagining Peter Facinelli as Mike Dexter saying “A-man-duh!!!” and where the heck Kellan was. This is a Twicon for goodness sake this is like Kellan’s Superbowl. If anyone was there it should have been Kellan! How was I going to get my prom-pose picture with him if he wasn’t there? What else better does Kellan Lutz have to do than be at a Twicon on a Saturday morning at 10am? Was he too busy making more videos about mammograms with his Mom or maybe it was prostate exams with his dad this time? Turn your head and cough, Dad!

The lovely and blonder Ashley came over to sign a huge poster thingy. Probably pissed about not being the big draw like during New Moon press. Or maybe just wondering why she said out loud if she had to pick one person to be stranded on a desert island it would be Jackson. They SO did it.

This was just some serendipity that I got this photo when Nikki came over to sign the poster thingy. Poor thing.

Then it was time for some hotties. The Bad Vamps. Bryce was a doll, her outfit, THE HAIR (no need for a wig you idiots!), her answers. She really does seem like a huge fan and talked as candidly as possible about taking over the role of Victoria. Then there was Xavier… and if I didn’t love him long time before, I loved him even longer now. What a dreamboat. Sadly, I wasn’t the only one who thought this and it led to some insane cat calling. At 11 in the morning?! Damn ladies, don’t make me turn the hose on you all. All that nonsense led me to this…

tons more shenanigans, 2nd hand embarrassing moments, and a billion more pictures after the jump

138 Commented

News on Breaking Dawn Production aka NO news on Breaking Dawn Production!

Dear Twilight and well, Breaking Dawn I suppose…

Today two posts came out referencing news behind the production of Breaking Dawn. While a few months ago we all thought making BD was a foregone conclusion and Summit was just waiting for New Moon to shatter box office records to make it official it’s been almost a month and a half since New Moon’s release and still no announcement. Since news on the twi front has been about as sparse as smiles at a KStew photoshoot, so any sort of news to come out will indefinitely make waves. But after reading both posts from the bitchtastic Ted C and a dude in his mom’s basement in North East Philly we learn… exactly… NOTHING. Why yes, it’s like a Robsten rumor… a lot of drama, a lot of words, a lot of retweets, a lot of “maybe’s” but no actual substance or truth. Someone at the LA Times spoke with producer Wyck Godrey and got this bit of totally evasive information regarding the splitting of BD into two films  “…If it’s not organic, I don’t think it will be done, and if it is, it will be…” Wow, heavy.

Breaking Dawn = tons more creepy images made by fans!

So we still don’t know if it will be made into two films (please say yes), whether Summit will hire geneticists to create a human vampire hybrid in their lair of doom (aka studio offices in Santa Monica) to play Renesmee, whether Taylor Lautner will in fact act out imprinting on a newborn baby, if Nikki Reed and KStew can patch up their differences long enough to play convincing as frenemies on screen, will Jacob and Leah spend 3/4ths of the movie running around the perimeter of the Cullen’s house “on patrol” thus reenacting the most boring parts of BD, will there be a behind the scene documentary on the making of Isle Esme which features all the “fade to black” scenes they cut out?

Sooooo many questions and ZERO answers.

Find out what we DO know about Breaking Dawn after the jump

240 Commented

Your really important Twilight news

Dear LTTers,

It has come to our attention that many of you come to us for your Twilight news. I understand. We are a valuable news source for up-to-date twilight news & offer a breath of first-hand knowledge (just see letters: The music Stephenie Meyer REALLY listened to while writing Twilight and Jackson got hurt, did he try the leg hitch?

No seriously? Some of you come to US for news? Guys… I have to confess… we leave a lot out.  In order to bring you a brilliant letter each day, we just have to leave it at that- ONE brilliant letter.  So we miss a lot of really important stuff. In fact, sometimes we’re so focused on breaking down insignificant details of unimportant photo shoots, and naming background characters who tag along with the famous people that we ourselves don’t even know what’s going on in the Twi-world. I feel like that this week. Or the past few weeks. So today I’m going to do a run-down of the latest Twi news. Don’t want you missing anything really important!

  • eclipselogoSummit promises to “treat” us with “title treatment” (wtf?) when @twilight receives 200,000 followers on twitter. However, since everyone knows that no one who starts a twitter a month before their SECOND movie releases is to be considered a valuable source for news, they can’t get to 200,000 followers. And someone gets mad. So they release the Eclipse logo. And underwhelm us all. BONUS TIDBIT OF NEWS: Today they just got their 132,763rd follower. They promise to give us something special again IF they reach 200,000. We’re guessing it’s David Slade’s actual height.
  • Harper’s Bazaar tweet-hints that they will soon announce who is on their cover for December. They forget who we are. And that we’re not stupid. And as a result they are punished. And the photo shoot leaks. And we laugh. After we stop crying that we’re not Kristen in this photo-shoot and make a mental note to start saving our Hefty trash bags for a little fashion statement of our own.
  • Toys R’ Us, yes you heard me right, opened a “New Moon Boutique” further solidifying the fact that we can’t believe we’re involved with this fandom. What do I have in common with 7 year olds who know who Geoffrey the Giraffe is? Besides the fact that I also know who Geoffrey the Giraffe is? My only question is if they’re going to be carrying any Twilight-related “toys” ifyouknowwhati’msayin’
  • Speaking of “toys” and in not-really-Twilight-related-news, but still-Twilight-related, this particular (not work-friendly) toy has been out for awhile now. We’ve been waiting to talk about it until we could review it. I got it about 3 weeks ago, tried it out and sent it to Moon who also tried it out. We just got one, ya know, to save money. We’re going to each keep it for a week and then pass it on. It’ll kinda be like the Sisterhood of the Traveling Pants except it’s The Sisterhood of the Traveling Sparkling Dildo.* The real news is, though, the reviews of the product. Here are our favs:

    OMG! I attatch mine to a wheel chair and pretend Billy Black is effing from behind, then I get another one and attatch a moustache to it and pretend it’s Charlie Swan..he loves it!

    This is highly logical. I ordered four, let’s hope they all fit under my snuggie. Continue…

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