New Moon means new laughs

Dear New Moon,

I know my letter title sounds like I might have a funny commentary about New Moon, the movie, but no, not yet. At press time I’ve only seen the movie once and I’m still reveling in Chris Weitz’ brilliancy. Plus I’m exhausted. Utterly exhausted. This week in LA with Moon was one of the best I’ve ever had, but we were busy and went went went non-stop. We were like little energizer bunnies or like me and Rob if we ever ended up in the same bed. We didn’t stop. So when I finally got a moment to rest yesterday in the airport as I waited for my plane home (as I was a major sad panda) I caught up on all the videos I missed from the past few weeks.  Here are 3 of my favorites!

My favorite Twilight cast interview last year does it again. Part 1 (warning. Don’t watch in your Sunday best. Lots of Language)

Swiftner lives!

Part 2 of uncensored cast interview:

Happy Sunday! Hope you laughed. I promise a REAL commentary about all the new laughs you are sure to provide us for months to come very soon. For now, I’m going to nap!

Love,
UnintendedChoice

Our internet game is ridiculous: The Forum, LTT, Twitter

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Jackson got hurt. Did he try the leg hitch?

Dear Jackson,

Rumor has it that this week on the Eclipse set, you fell down and went ‘boom.‘ You poor baby! What happened? Tell me, it didn’t happen to involve a ‘leg hitch’ between Edward & Bella did it? I have no idea why you’d be on set for that scene, but I’m just double checking. Uh, if not, you don’t happen to know if there IS a leg hitch scene do you? Could you ask David Slade? Yes. Now. Get off the couch, stop icing whatever body part is ailing you (or remove the female currently helping you to “feel better”) and go check for me. And relay this message: “Dear David Slade, if there’s not a leg hitch you’re gonna wish you never took this job as director (well, you’ll wish it again). Trust me- you’d rather be shot by Charlie’s bb gun, attacked by wolves while a vampire sucks your neck and Cathy the Cougar offers to pleasure you orally then experience my wrath if Eclipse doesn’t include a leg hitch.”

To help you feel better, Jackson, I’ve provided, with the help of the gals at Rob’s flat in The Forum, Zephyersky & JodieO (okay they did ALL the work),  a little “Jackson porn” as well as some caption action. Okay, most of that is for us- we’ve been so worried about you- but I’ve included a little somethin’ somethin’ I think you’ll enjoy.

Feel better,
UnintendedChoice

Celebrating Jashley!

I’m starting to feel better! Are you? More after the jump! Continue…

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Kristen & Taylor: The real life Bella & Jacob?

Dear Jake & Bells,

I think you have competition for the cutest friends that have ever lived:

Yes. Kristen & Taylor- or… that’s at least what Moon & I think…

Stewart-Lautner3_l

Friends? Or lovers....?

Moon: so now that we’ve seen this video….don’t you love how KStew acts like shes old and wise. PUH LEASE girl!
UC: right…. you’re 19!!!
Moon: I liked her at the beginning with the smile stuff and then she had to get all “old soul” on us and talk about cajones
Moon: WAiT TiLL YOU GROW UP A LiTTLE and shut it
UC: side note- I love in that interview at the TCAs when he’s asking about the teenage years and doesn’t realize she’s STiLL a teen, and she’s pretending she’s not… but also knows everyone knows she is..and it’s a big ol’ awkward turtle
Moon: it’s cause she acts like she’s 50. Be 19. Dude I wasnt that serious at 19
UC: seriously. do keg stands- leak naked pictures of yourself or SOMETHiNG
Moon: Kellan will hold your legs while you do a keg stand- he’s a pro I can tell
UC: he’s done a LOT of keg stands…and then spent a lot of time in prayer the following day
Moon: Taylor would 100% be headed in his footsteps if he was a normal kid going to college soon- he’s so that good times guy. Just laughing it up, joking around- he just seems like a good time
UC: I have a feeling Taylor’s read some- oh dang.. what’s it called? Oh yeah… Wild at Heart
Moon: Like Taylor’s the guy you want to run errands with you on Saturday cause even though it’s mundane, it’s gonna be a lot of fun
UC: he’s probably gone on the Wild at Heart conferences where they go into the wild & think about how to never masterbate again…. with Big Daddy, of course
Moon: well if Taylor’s read Wild at Heart than KStew most defs needs to read Captivating
UC: dude I don’t think it’s called Wild at Heart- I think that’s the movie about the horse & the blind girl
Moon: it is wild at heart and also the movie. and the girl’s version of the book is Captivating
UC: First off, I love that you know what movie i’m talking about. and #2, I recently sold Captivating on ebay, and I’m pretty sure the address I shipped it to was for “Bella Stewart” somewhere in Vancouver…
Moon: totally cried at that movie when she went blind! and he loved her anyway….
UC: so.. you’re right…. Kristen is reading Captivating
UC: TOTALLY cried- my fav movie when I was growin up
Moon: she needs to learn how to get captivating
UC: I haven’t seen it in years
Moon: maybe it’s wild hearts cant be broken??
UC: YES!
Moon: whatever I get the two confused
UC: it’s often that I confuse men’s books on how not to lust vs. Disney films about blind chicks riding horses

Moon: I want to see Taylor & Kellan at a promise keepers event
UC: with Big Daddy and Kellan’s dad
Moon: And Big Daddy will wear a shirt that reads, “real mean sing real loud”
Moon: oh Promise keepers
UC: tens of thousands of men in the same room talking about how sometimes they jack off to thoughts of someone other than their wife.
Moon: while Phillips Craig and Dean lead the alter call. And then they all hug it out at the end and pile back into the church van
UC: church jokes are fun

What’s this site about again? Oh yeah, Twilight. We get back to it after the jump… Continue…

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Twilight- Escape from reality

defining-twilight1Dear deep thinking LTTers,

I’ve been a bit down lately. There’s the looming reality that it looks like Rob might not actually be interested in being my on the side boyfriend and is shacked up with an 80s hairdo right now. And it doesn’t look like Summit got my letter begging them to cast me in a small role in Eclipse. And no matter how much I wish to be “17 Again,” I keep waking up way too old to become the girlfriend of Taylor Lautner. Yes, there’s all that, but what’s really gotten me down is the reality of the world we live in. There’s war, there’s typhoons, there’s terrorism & hunger. People with jobs & families are kidnapped, murdered and raped, and all the while I sit in my little comfy desk chair (that I actually have the audacity to complain about because there’s this little metal piece that sometimes pokes my butt) in my perfectly heated home with my cute little happy cats and my full belly, with food in the cupboard, clothes in my closest and money in my bank account. And I blog about vampires….. while the world around me is full of a pain and a hurt that I have no way of comprehending.

Yeah – I just went there – On LTT where we usually talk about Buttcrack Santa, Fake lesbians & ponder how many cheeseburgers Big Daddy Lautner can handle in one lunchtime sitting. I’d be lying if I said I’ve never experienced guilt for spending so much time talking and thinking about this blog about vampires while the world around me is crumbling. In the grand scheme of things, Twilight matters so very little. But then it occurred to me- maybe that’s why it’s so meaningful to everyone. Maybe we all love Twilight so much because it’s an escape from reality.  Stephenie Meyers built this world where we can experience first love all over again. We get to watch someone go through self-acceptance, see the bonds of family strengthen and old walls between enemies fall down. And the communities that have sprung up because of the Twilight world (ahem) give people the perfect place to go when they want to forget what’s going on in the outside world for just a little while…

Bella_and_EdwardI’m sure you’ve come across people in your life, just as I have, who don’t get it.  They mock your sudden interest in vampires and can’t understand how you’re so interested in a book series that is on the shelves back by the children’s section at Barnes & Noble. They think it’s something as simple as an obsession over a book. Sure- the story is captivating, and the movie happens to star a really handsome guy. And the drama that surrounds the cast & filming is pretty fun since it’s so high-profile now, but all that isn’t the point. The point is that it’s not famine and war and financial difficulties and a job hunt. It’s not real- it’s a world where we can forget what’s really going on. And I’m not sure it really matters what it is- it could have been a book about a pack of wolves falling in love with nursery school kids all over the globe, but it wasn’t- it was Twilight. (And for those that wish it weren’t, it includes a lil’ nursery school love story for you all…)

We’ve heard your stories. We’ve read your e-mails. We’ve gotten to know so many of you. Our hearts have broken and tears have spilled when we’ve read what you were going through when you picked up the first book. Every day we’re completely overwhelmed that a silly idea of writing a blog in December turned into a community where people have found friends that understand their pain and have the ability to make them laugh. We love that we get the chance to make you laugh and help you forget reality for a few paragraphs every day. Moon & I have stories of our own too. We promise to share them someday, but know that Twilight, LTT & LTR and YOU have truly changed our lives.

edandbellaTwilight doesn’t change the world. Twilight does very little for the world, but Twilight has brought us friendships & a community that allows us laughter in times of sorrow, excitement in times where we might otherwise be scared and a way to escape the daily realities of life, even for just a few moments….

Feeling a lil’ contemplative (you think?),
UnintendedChoice

PS: If you’re wondering if I’ve gotten a visit from a monthly friend, the answer is “She’s coming today.” x

Have you had that moment when you read a news story, watched TV or just remembered that life isn’t our little bubble and felt guilty? How do you balance something that’s been so good & healthy for you (Twilight!) with remembering it’s not all of life? Do you feel like these are discussion questions from freshman year of college?

Keep the discussion going over in The Forum
Yeah.. sorry… Kinda deep today- LAUGH with Moon on LTR

Art Source #1 and Source #2

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Blurbs about the Teen Choice Awards

Dear Twilight,

Another award ceremony is over huh? I’ll confess I didn’t watch it. But I plan to do no work and catch up on all the video clips I missed during the day today.

Don’t think I didn’t spend all Monday & Monday night breaking down people, outfits & gossip from the TCAs though. No no.. never doubt me.  Enjoy today’s Blurbs about the Teen Choice Awards from The Quad, Calliope & Brooke.

Love,
UnintendedChoice

The one with that girl we don’t recognize from Twilight

[vodpod id=ExternalVideo.859539&w=425&h=350&fv=]

EastFriend: I watched Mark Steines’ cute lil’ interivew with the Twilight cast after the TCAs ended, and could not, for the life of me, figure out why there was a little Asian lady tagging along with the Twi-crew.

  • Did Ashley rescue her from a Taiwanese sweatshop and put her on Summit’s staff, thereby offering and encouraging a better lifestyle?
  • Was sweet lil’ Asian lady really a dealer in disguise? Cause some serious doobie could be hidden in the folds of that scarf!

And then it hit me. It’s Justin Chong. Dude…when did he come out? And where was Neil Patrick Harris?

The one where Rob channeled Ward Cleaver

Leave it to Rob-ver

Leave it to Rob-ver

EastFriend: Rob looked cute.  The scruffy beard was good times.  But the outfit?   What’s with channeling Ward Cleaver at the TCAs?  Even Mike Brady had better style than that.
4 hours later she still can’t get over it
EastFriend: 50 bucks says that plaid shirt Rob wore last night was STINKY. Marcus’ sweat all over it. You know he didn’t wash it. Just picked it up off Marcus’ hotel room floor. Thank God Stephanie prob had the foresight to say, “Let me press that for you.” Maybe she sprayed Febreeze on the arm pits. One can only hope…

Read all about classical music, twilight scandals & real lesbians after the jump! Continue…

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