Defending Twilight

Dear Twilight,

I want you to know that I still love you, even though we really haven’t seen much of each other lately.
The other day at work, I was surfing the net like you do when there is nothing to do. I saw a random headline about what to do now that Harry Potter is over and so I clicked it. The post suggested many other series one could look into to fill the HP void, with a list of “Pros” and “Cons” for each suggestion. Of course you were in there, but I’m going to go out on a limb and guess that you’re only included because of all the success (ie money) the movies have had, and not because the writer thinks you are a legitimate story worth anyone’s time. Here’s why:

This is the part where Edward put Bella in a choke hold because talked to Mike Newton

Under the “Con” for Twilight: “the films portray a physically, emotionally abusive relationship in an overwhelmingly positive light. Also, the story involves a hulking teenage werewolf romantically bonding with a baby. Gross.” [I've bolded the part that inspired this letter.]

First of all, lol at the Jake/Renesmee reference – we won’t even go there. Then I was like, “Hold on, What?” I re-read to make sure I saw it correctly. Then I sat there going, “Physical abuse? What’s he talking about? Bella having to beg Edward for another go? Or wait, is this about the headboard?” It’s been nearly 3 years since my single reading of the books, so I even emailed TeamSeth to make sure that I wasn’t forgetting something. “Not unless you count the baby” she said.

This is the part where Edward bites Bella because she talked back

Ok, so Twilight, here’s the thing. Some people don’t like you. Some people even hate you. This is not new; we all know this. I can’t speak for anyone else, but personally, I don’t care if someone doesn’t like you. They can call you stupid, lame, childish, ridiculous, whatever. They are entitled to their opinions, even if they’ve never met you. We can’t control what other people think of us. I’m not going to argue with them or try to change their minds. I don’t feel like I need to stand up for your story; you can take care of yourself. But Twilight, this really kind of pissed me off. I mean, I can overlook the emotional abuse claim, because I think one could make a case for it and have a real discussion/debate on that subject. I’m not saying that Edward & Bella’s relationship is perfect or that it should be held up on a pedestal – this is a work of fiction after all. But to say that the story essentially glorifies a physically abusive relationship is not only completely false, but borderline slanderous; and ignorant…which I pointed out in the comments, in the most sane, tweedy, normal way possible. (I guess I was inspired by Moon’s Facebook comment.) Last I checked, I had 7 thumbs-down and no thumbs-up. I mean, I really can’t understand why someone would even say that. You’d think that a seemingly semi-professional blogger would take the time to make sure he actually knows what he’s talking about before callously making a rather serious (IMO) accusation about a popular story. I’m not even touching on what that would mean (if the allegations were true) about all the people, women especially, who love the story. I’m just trying to point out that it’s a false claim.

Twilight, I can’t promise that I’m always going to be around. Eventually, we will drift apart. It happens. But I can promise you that I will remember our time together fondly and will reminisce with others who also love you. And apparently, I will also be there to defend you, but only when you really need it.

I got your back,
Luludee

So what the hell WAS this guy talking about? Do you find yourself standing up for Twilight? Does Twilight really need us to defend it? Do people run away screaming when you do?

I still miss Moon, in case you were wondering:

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53 Commented

Twilosophy: Is any guy ever an “Edward?” or are they all “Jacobs?”

Dear LTT-ers and Twilosophy majors,

For the last few years since we’ve started LTT and LTR and since reading the books, podcasting with the guys and whatnot I’ve had this thought roaming around my twi-addled brain but never felt ready to tackle it… then recently both Chris Weitz and Stephenie Meyer spoke about the very thing I had been wondering… are there really any “Edwards” out there or are they all actually “Jacobs?”

Recently, a Christ Weitz follower tweeted him asking if he was Team Jacob or Team Edward and this was his response:

This guy's a "jacob?" *swoon*

I am a Jacob. So that has to be my team, by default. Except really, honestly, I’m team Bella.
@chrisweitz
.

First I loved him more because he self identifies as a “Jacob” but it got me to thinking since most guys I know have said they’re a “Jacob” and most ladies say they married a “Jacob” IS ANYONE ever an Edward? Has any guy self identified as an “Edward?” And has anyone every really gotten their “Edward?” An “Edward” being the seemingly unattainable, hot, sorta-pretty-much perfect guy who you think would never give you the time of day.

Yup, definitely a Jacob

After being in this “world” for many years I would say that a majority of married Twilight lovers would say they married their “Jacob.” Many of our fellow bloggers and even Stephenie herself has said this. She mentioned that marrying Pancho was like marrying her Jacob.  Stephenie also had this to say about Rob and Taylor in her recent interview with USA Today…

On working with Pattinson and Lautner: “Rob is more like Jacob than Edward. He’s goofy, he’s funny, he doesn’t take much seriously. But he can turn Edward on like that (she snaps her fingers) when he needs to be Edward. Taylor’s who we hang out with most. He’s a lot like fun, happy Jacob.” – Stephenie Meyer in USA Today

Wait, this guys a Jacob??

It’s ok, Rob/Edward fans, you can peel yourself off the floor now and let’s come to terms with the fact that Rob is not and never was Edward. Not that UC and I ever thought that because we’ve pretty much pegged him as a super nerd from day one yet it keeps bringing up the question: If these guys are all “Jacobs” then are all men out there really Jacobs? Or can some of them beEdwards and then become Jacobs?

Furthermore (oh big transitional words!) if most guys end up being Jacobs than what does that say about the Twilight story and Bella and Edward’s relationship? Is it really the stuff of fantasy because there are no “Edwards” in real life? And if that’s true have we finally found the reason why Twilight is so popular, because it’s a fantasy in every sense of the word?

That's a whole lotta Jacobs right there

So do I have an Edward to look forward to or should I just stop ignoring the Jacobs of my life and realize that though he may not sparkle he’s pretty darn fabulous and he might also be able to fix that weird squeaky sound my cars been making.

Here’s to the Jacobs!
Themoonisdown

Thoughts? Who’s married/dated/engaged to their Jacob? Do you think any guy is every REALLY an Edward? Are all men Jacobs at the end of the day?

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140 Commented

Admitting you like Twilight.. on NATIONAL TV?

Dear Twilight,

We got an email from friend Shannon the other day & I got quite Twilosophical when thinking about what she wrote:

UC & Moon-

So I was reading the bios for the upcoming bachelor season. (I use to be an avid watcher but I’m sitting this season out) That said, the bios crack me up! I love their AWESOME literary suggestions as well *sarcasm.* I mean I love me some Twilight (thus why I read your blog every day and am emailing you this) but I would never claim that it is my favorite book. There are a few girls who take claim to it.

This is my most favorite one:

Please love her excellent spelling skills! *sarcasm*

Lisa M. is 100% completely RIGHT. Except about her spelling of Stephenie’s name. But admitting it? On National TV? (Let alone a TV show where you want to end up taking home a husband!?) Would I do that? Forgetting the fact that I did it on web TV and then also on regional TV and talked about it in a New Zealand Magazine, would I do it if I were on the Bachelor? Or, say, on a cooking show. Or say HGTV answers my cry for help to please please PLEASE decorate my sad-looking 750 sq. foot loft & asks me about the stack of Twilight “stuff” sitting in the corner by my desk. Would I fess up to my love? Or would I just try to pass it off like it’s a book I read “this one time” and never thought of again?

Olivia on Biggest Loser does it. (Or wait.. Maybe she hasn’t admitted it but we’ve just made enough noise (Plus there’s a Letters 2 Team Purple you have to be reading) that she can’t deny it!) In fact, LOTS of celebs & people in media admit their love. Jimmy Fallon FANBOYS over anything Twi! What’s my problem? Why do I think I wouldn’t go all-out and admit that I go crazy for this stuff!? I asked Moon & she wanted me to put it in context. Am I talking when she wins Barbara Walter’s Most Fascinating person of 2011? Or Being interviewed by the news cameras after the next drive-by shooting that happens when she’s hanging out in East LA? I told her to imagine she was being interviewed by her hero- Conan:

Well, I’d play it a lot differently of rob was next to me, but I’d admit to liking Twi. And I’d try to play it cool. (like, i would yello ZOMG jacob!!!I#W()#($ TEAM SPARKLEPEEN!!!!) But It’s Conan. He’s get it. If anyone would, HE would! I trust Coco!

So after MUCH Twilosophical thinking (like 7 minutes) I’ve decided this: If I had never started this blog, I would NOT have a problem admitting that I love Twilight SO much and cried multiple times, fell in love with Edward immediately & didn’t talk to my family for 5 days at the beach because of it. And that’s because I would just be a normal fan- who squees at pics of Eddy & Bella in Bed and doesn’t know that there are actual fans out there who have the phrase “I love to masturbate” written in their twitter profiles doing just THAT to the picture. But the thing is.. I do know about that. I do know things I wish I didn’t know about the fandom. I have seen the MAJOR GOOD but also the bad. and the ugly. And so sometimes it makes me ashamed.

But then again- such incredible things have happened to me as a result of this blog so…. watch what I’m about to do right here….I would admit it. And Proudly. But… with a sidenote- It wouldn’t be: “I’m just a girl who likes Twilight” but would be, “I love Twilight because it’s a great story AND it’s brought wonderful people into my life & given me great, fun opportunities I wouldn’t trade for the world- no, not even the crazy bad, ugly stories. But if you want to hear any, oh do I have SOME to share!” Aww.. cute! Then Jimmy Fallon & I would hi-five. Oprah would give me a house in the Caribbean & Paula Dean would make me cupcakes with 5 sicks of butter & 3 packs of bacon.

Love,
UnintendedChoice

So imagine YOU’RE on National TV. First off, what show are you on. And secondly, how are you gonna admit that you like Twilight? How DETAILED will you get!?

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82 Commented

Remind me I’m NOT alone!

Dear LTT- I’ve been missing you all. The latter half of 2010 was SO busy for me and Twi-news slowed down SO much that I’ve felt MIA. I’ve been here, and I’ve been reading your comments. But I’ve had little time to comment back. We’re SO far behind on email responding it’s not even funny. Literally there are great question suggestions for our interview with Stephenie Meyer back in JUNE sitting in our inbox that I never responding to. Fail. I’m adding a resolution to last week’s LTT resolutions that I’ll be more LTT and Twilight “present.” Then again one of my personal resolutions is to be more committed to my job. And to my marriage. And friends & sisters. That’s a lot of stuff. Do I have time to fit Rob in there? (That’s what she said). What about Big Daddy? Will a time come in my life where I have to choose between the two? RIGHT- as if you have any QUESTION about who I’d choose. The Olive Garden would be soooooo boring with Rob. Big Daddy all the way!

Anyway, I spent the last day of my wonderful holidays in NYC with my beautiful girl cousins. THREE of them are pregnant. There was a lot of baby talk, eating & pee breaks. But my wonderful day got me home very late and I have to get to work on time tomorrow. Something about a resolution I made last year about being “committed to my job.” Bleh. Bad idea. So I’ll blog again soon. I do truly miss you. But today Stella takes the reigns, leading us in a discussing that I think is worth having! Miss you all! XO -UC

Dear Twilight,

I had a girl’s night out last week for the first time in ages.  You know, one of those nights where you get Husband to put the kids to bed so you can meet up to pretend you are still 22 and ready to rage? Well I had one too many drinks (which these days is two) and the next thing you know I am spilling my Twilight guts out to the ladies!  No this wasn’t as if I were hanging out with any one of you girls from LTT /LTR, I was hanging out with Twilight virgins who had no idea what in the hell I was slurring about.  Needless to say, I didn’t win over any new fans of the saga and left the night feeling lonely and well… weird.

I am sure you are asking, what could I possibly have said to have turned a lovely night of girl talk into one of shame and misfortune?!  Well it wasn’t so much one thing that I said, it was that I just went on and on about the philosophy behind THE Twilight and I even waxed poetic about you lovely readers who I so felt one with and didn’t even know.  My audience sat there staring at me… crickets….

How can they NOT think this is funny!?

Why are these women, my so-called friends, so adamant about not reading Twilight….Why??  What are they afraid of??  Why do they bother putting themselves above it?  I mean REALLY!!  Why must they deny themselves the joy of the love triangle and blood lust?  I feel that I have given them a gift that they have ungratefully left unopened!  Those bitches!!
I am reaching out to you for support.  Please remind me how normal I am!  How were you introduced to Twilight?  Did anyone have to twist your arm to read it?  Do your friends make you feel crazy, juvenile, non-intellectual, weird…..Did you ever show up late to a preschool board meeting and exclaim (out of breath and rosy cheeked), “Sorry I am sooooooo late!  I just HAD to finish the end of Breaking Dawn!”?   (Yes, this is a true story and the director of the school was waiting for me to arrive so she could give her resignation—oh the horror!!)  Has your husband ever

Embrace it

accused you of being a horny teenager, but like not in a good way?   Do your kids yell things out like, “Look mom, there is your Edward!” when standing in line at Target?  Have you ever anonymously left a copy of Twilight at any one of your friend’s homes, in hopes they will read it and then obsess over it with you?

Please help me, and ……THANK YOU LTT/LTR ladies for loving Twilight like I do and going on and on about it day after day.  I love you for it and I love that when I find myself asking if I am normal you answer back, YES, a resounding YES!!!

Your (I hope) friend in solidarity,
Stella (and no that’s not my real name—oh the shame, that I must hide behind a pseudonym!)

Well, you’re getting a resounding YES from me, Stella! I BLOG about this stuff daily & it took me 2 years to get my sister to read the series (She loved it. I win!) and some friends still look at me like I’m crazy. You are not alone. We should write a song. And sing it around a campfire. At a Quileute tribal meeting.

Don’t forget- starting today the Resolutionary Challenge 2011 is kicking off on the forum! Make sure you join everyone if you’re looking for fun, encouragement & healthy living in 2011!!! Resolutionary Challenge 2011

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51 Commented

Twilosophy: Special Twilight dates – Should we care?

(Sit back and throw on your tweed and serious glasses as I try to be non-controversial and talk some Twilosophy)

Dear LTT-ers,

Did you know a week ago Monday was Bella’s birthday? And did you have Edward and Bella’s Anniversary marked down on your calendar for August 13th??? And what about the Newton’s Anniversary? And maybe even the day Jacob phased for the first time? Did you celebrate those days or do you even know them? Nope. I sure don’t. So does this make me a “bad” fangirl?

Can't believe this exists. Click to enlarge for maximum speechlessness

I mean sure, we love Edward and Bella. Obviously, we wouldn’t be here if it wasn’t for them. We cheered for them when they finally got up the nerve to “be friends.” We gasped and felt 2nd hand butterflies for them when they finally got together. We felt those first love jitters right along with the blessed couple. We even cried when they broke up (be honest!) and we cheered when they got back together (FINALLY 379 pages later!). We jumped up and down when Bella finally gave in and accepted Edward’s proposal. We maybe misted a little when they got married in the Cullen backyard and we definitely sighed a lot during the Isle Esme honeymoon. And who doesn’t remember Bella’s issues with turning 18? Yea, psychotic, I know.

But is it necessary as fans of the books to celebrate their anniversary/birthday/whatever every year? I was just cruising around the interwebs trying to catch up on what’s been happening in the Twidom and I found out that we missed both Bella’s birthday AND Edward and Bella’s Anniversary (GASP! The HORROR!) which is according to come elephant-brained readers made August 13th 2006 their 4 year anniversary. Which means they got married the same year as my brother and sister-in-law and now I will never forget the year and now I can never forgive myself for knowing such trivia. Twilight Bar Trivia Night here I come!

You get this because the Bella/Edward anniversary pics from google are TOO embarassing

So if people post stuff about character birthdays and wedding anniversaries, who are we to judge but what do you get the couple who has everything? 4th year gift is something like paper… and that’s a lame gift.

Do you think Stephenie Meyer herself even remembers the date she gave Bella for her birthday or the date Edward and Bella got married? Maybe… but I bet she remembers the exact date she had “THE DREAM” cause I’m sure it’s like UC and I remembering the day we started these blogs. I’ll always think about LTT and LTR on December 8th every year probably for the rest of my life especially when I tell my grandchildren about that thing called a “blog” I used to write, cause “I’m down with the kids.” DUH! So I guess that’s what it is. It’s about remembering what’s important and special to you. Regardless of how inconsequential it may seem. Remember those special days in your life and pay homage to them because they matter. I guess I should do a little research and see when Buttcrack Santa died so we can host an official memorial every year plus a moment of silence to honor him. RIP. See what I did right there? A good ol BCS reference, haven’t seen one of those in a while, have ya?

March 15th, 1986 (the day Mike Newton was conceived. Duh)
Themoonisdown

PS See, I can be non-controversial when I want to be! Someone give me a Twilight Conversation Heart, forget the cookie.

What days are special to you? Any have a Twilight reference. Also, come clean do you know any of the Twilight special dates like Bella’s birthday? BE HONEST!

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86 Commented