Watching the New Moon trailer – It's all in the reaction!

Dear Twi-hards-

I love you so because I am one of you… deep down in my screaming 14yr old heart of hearts. I shouldn’t have to convince you: the blogs, the live blogging the awards, the mini edwards pics for goodness sake, that should tell you all you need to know. The only place I have yet to venture into (besides crafting wearable twilight pants) in my fandom is the reaction video! And boy are there some amazing ones out there. Some awesomely funny, some totally 2nd hand embarrassing and some like looking in a mirror. Recently, these reaction videos have been getting some major play around the internet and one gal in particular. She is actually one of UC and my favorite vloggers… she is so wild and crazy we almost can’t believe she exists in real life. No one can be this whacky or this devoted and just downright entertaining, right?? A few nights ago I was writing my blog post and who should i see on tv? None of other than our favorite vlogger, the light of our lives, NuttyMadam herself! They showed her on Vh1′s Best Day Ever, so of course like a weirdo I sent UC a text at 2 in the morning her time yelling (cause you can do that over text) SHE’S ON TV!!! OUR GIRL IS ON TV!!!!

And actually the wild thing is her New Moon reaction video isn’t her best one, sure she cries and yells crap like THE BEACH! but it’s nothing like her other greatest hits like the Twilight trailer reaction video or better yet when she goes off on Breaking Dawn haters!

Watch her and other folks’s New Moon Reaction videos… adjust your speakers accordingly, let out any small animals and remove glass objects from the vicinity of the computer…


She’s “gonna fangirl SOOOO hard.” Uh… don’t break anything dear.

Also check out her reactions AFTER seeing Twilight, like directly outside the theater door, trust me!

Grab some popcorn and take the jump to watch some of our other favorite reaction videos from the New Moon trailer…
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Just as awkward as you thought it would be – Kristen Stewart and New Moon madness at the MTV Movie Awards

OMG you guys I made it up the steps without tripping!! I won't do anything else embarrasing! At ALL!

OMG you guys I made it up the stairs without tripping!! I won’t do anything else embarrassing! At ALL! (for the next 2.4 seconds)

Dear Kristen (my new favorite letters recipient, apparently)-

I’m going on hour 6 of live blogging the MTV Movie awards, I’ve fainted over your fake out kiss with Rob, I’ve eaten too many Sprinkles cupcakes, I kept repeating to myself “he is 17″ while looking over my shoulder for Chris Hanson, I’m bleary eyed and tired, but most of all, I’m more excited than I’ve ever been about the New Moon movie (if that’s even possible) and I wanted to say I think I may even start to like you after seeing your total fumble after winning the ‘Best Female Performance’ award…

This is exactly the type of moment you used to read about in that section in Seventeen called “My Most Embarrassing Moments,” and you’d cringe right along with them as they had toilet paper stuck to their shoe or they ran into a locker door as Jimmy, the cute quarterback walked by… but yours is beyond 2nd hand embarrassing and captured for all eternity courtesy of Youtube. I seriously can’t think of a better way you could have handled it and all the while coming off the most real or human you EVER have! Best quote of yours EVER:

“I was just about as awkward as you thought I was going to be, BYE!”

Seriously? So much win right there.

I must be in a sugar coma from the cupcakes cause I’m saying nice things to you… ok though THE HAIR?! Seriously, a headband, a clip, whatever just NEVER wear it down again or I’ll go nuts. Whew, I feel better now.

XOXO your new fake lesbian lover
Themoonisdown

PS HUGE thanks and thumbs up to NewMoonMovie.org for hosting the most rad live blogging event ever, check out all the goodies he already has live, also don’t forget our other live bloggers in crime Confessions of a TwiCrack Addict and Lauren’s Bite! And an even bigger thanks to you all for showing up and squeeeeing with us as we watched the trailer premier and Rob in his maitre d jacket.

Don’t miss the LTR MTV Movie Awards Post!

Take the jump to see more pics and video from the MTV movie awards last night!
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How to create your very own Unicorn

Dear “All the single (LTT) ladies,”

I know. It’s rough out there. You meet a nice fella, and he takes you out, but it just doesn’t feel right. He took you to a day-time baseball game so clearly he doesn’t sparkle. In like 10 minutes he consumed 3 cheeseburgers and 4 hot dogs with chilli & onions on top, so obviously he’s not a “vegetarian.”  He didn’t seem very interested in finding out what was hidden in your mind, and you’re pretty sure he grabbed the beer girl’s ass when he thought you weren’t looking. Is it you? Is chivalry dead? Are your expectations too high because of that vampire story you blew through in a weekend? Yeah, probably. (But in the case of this baseball date-dude, he sounds like a fat slob, so good call on saying no to date #2).

Would you like this to be your Unicorn?

Would you like this to be your Unicorn?

It’s safe to say that the Twilight Saga has created some unrealistic expectations of men for many women. (A week or so ago Lauren from Lauren’s Bite wrote a great bit about this very topic.) We think we know the solution to your problem- what you really need: A Unicorn of your very own!

If you’re new to LTT/LTR you’re probably asking what the H a Unicorn is. Well, check out our first post about a Unicorn here, but basically a Unicorn is a mythical creature- something no one is really sure actually exists. Aka: A man who reads, loves or watches Twilight.  Unicorns tend to hang out at airports, but we’ve spotted them a few other places over the past few months, including on our very own blog! (If all this time you’ve been thinking we’re talking about the “unicorns” in the fan ficton Wide Awake well, you would be wrong (and kinda perverted)! If you’re unfamiliar with what a unicorn is in Wide Awake… I’ll tell you when you’re older)

As a young married gal (not to a unicorn but to a guy who says stuff about rob) who runs a blog where unicorns like to lurk, I feel I am appropriate skilled in the art of making a unicorn. You can call me your guru, I won’t mind.

This Unicorn would like to be your lover

This Unicorn would like to be your lover

Step 1: (cut a hole in the box) Find yourself a male. Any male will do, but it would be best if he’s someone you could see yourself gettin’ it on with (cuz that’s what happens with me as your guru). Don’t worry if he seems a little out of your league. I’m the best at this, I assure you.

Step 2: Invite this outta-your-league guy over to your home. Tell him Ashley Greene is going to be there (“we’re going to lie”- name that quote!)

Step 3: Get him liquored up. Offer him any type of alcohol he’d like. When he asks where Ashley is, tell him she was swinging by to pick up Kristen, Rachelle & Nikki and they said to start without them.

Step 4: Keep him drinking until he passes out. Once he does, figure out a way to tie him up nice and tight. (An older brother or a burly man would be helpful in this step- ooh- you can ask the fat slob from your baseball date!)

Step 5:  When he awakens from his drunken slumber, tell him he isn’t allowed to leave until he reads all 4 books AND watches the movie (and the ET New Moon specials). If he resists, tell him the Twi-girls asked him too. Tell them they’ll reenact the scene in the middle of Eclipse when all the lesbian vampires get it on (“we’re going to lie”)

Step 6: A Unicorn is Born!

I was discussing this post with my husband trying to get some creative “how to make a unicorn” ideas and he said,

Mr. Choice:  A dude isn’t going to go hang out with some ugly chick and watch Twilight just because there’s beer there. Nobody likes beer that much.

Eff him. So I asked,

Me: What if it was a hot girl?

Mr. Choice: If he thought if he was going to be able to hook-up with her.”

Ask this Unicorn for a unicorn

Ask this Unicorn for a unicorn

As a result of this conversation I have another method for you to try which might possibly be more effective:

Step 1: Get hot (if you’re not already)

Step 2: Invite outta-your-league guy over to your home with no mention of Ashley Greene

Step 3: Tell him that if he watched Twilight with you, you’ll hook-up with him after.

Step 4: Ride ‘em hard.

Step 5: A unicorn is made (hopefully both kinds)

Told you I was a guru.

Love,
UnintendedChoice

Thanks to LaPush baby for the idea!

Coincidentally, the DAY I wrote this, ArmyUnicorn (our latest unicorn on LTT) wrote a how-to-guide for creating your own unicorn.  Although, I think mine is more realistic (and his doesn’t include Step #4 of my second method) his is kinda decent. Read after the jump!

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A Two Unicorn Tuesday

miracles do happen!

miracles do happen!

To my husband, the newest unicorn -

I have bugged you for months about Twilight, annoyed you would probably be the more appropriate term. You despised it and I’m pretty sure the eye rolling was an uncontrollable reflex every time the words “Twilight” or “Robert Pattinson” crossed my lips. And I was fine with that, I mean, you’re a guy. You’re supposed to hate Twilight, right?

Then something happened. When Twilight came out on DVD, we bought it and you sat down with me to watch it. And you liked it. Not just tolerated it, but actually enjoyed the movie. We watched all the special features together. You found the vampire kiss scenes just as crazy sexy as I did. The next day, we watched the commentary together. You found Rob as irresistible as me and offered him the number 3 spot on your man crush list.

And I was happy. The eye rolling stopped and you didn’t completely shut down whenever I started talking Twilight. But, when asked to read the book, you said no. You’re not much of a reader anyway, so that was cool.

Once again, something happened. The other night, you started spouting off knowledge about Twilight that could not have been collected while watching the movie. You talked about how Edward didn’t run off after the accident, and how Eric’s role just seemed to be a little larger than it should have been in the movie. When you saw my complete look of shock, you picked up the Twilight book and said, “I’m almost done with chapter 3″ and showed me where you were in the book. “I would have been farther along, but (our son) keeps taking the book and telling me, ‘No, that’s mommy’s book.’”

And now, right after our 5 year wedding anniversary, I realized I have married a genuine unicorn. And I couldn’t be happier!

Your loving wife,

Amber

P.S. Also, thanks for being cool about Rob and the whole freebie list thing. Oh, and the coupons I used to attempt to morph you into a Rob clone.

Get ready.. after the jump we have our first gay unicorn- YES! Best.Day.Ever

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This if how you found us? Vol. 2

f-a-k-e l-e-s-b-i-a-n-s

f-a-k-e l-e-s-b-i-a-n-s

Dear LTT/LTR Readers and Random Googlers -

It’s that time of the month again! Time to go trolling through the search terms that led people to our site. Last month we started this feature because we wanted to share with you awesome readers some of the funny stuff UC and I see on the ‘backend’ of the blogs that never get seen by anyone else. For the uninitiated wordpress has this handy dandy feature that shows us every day what terms people google to find us. Most searches that lead people here are obvious ones like: Twilight, Letters, Rob, shirtless Kellan pics… you know the usuals! But every so often we get a real winner that simply must be shared with the world and here are this months…

Top searches:
These are terms people used to find us

  • filet-o-fish fan site – uh no, not us but this sounds like the perfect name for our new LetterstoTaylorsDad fan site. We LOVE you Taylor’s Dad!
  • a shirtless jackson rathbone – it warms my heart that we’re thought of as a place where shirtless pics of the cast can be found. Someday I will unveil my gallery of all the shirtless pictures I’ve been collecting since we started these blogs
  • kristen stewart looking like shit – so uh you’re looking for just ANY picture of Kristen, huh. Is there any other way she looks?
  • robert pattinson buttcrack – Oh HALE nah, who does Rob think he is? Our lover Buttcrack Santa. NEVER!
  • Robert pattinson win a date contest 2009 – Brought to you by a Nigerian Prince and the UK Lottery (which you’ve won!). Just ask these girls
  • im rob pattinson ex-girlfriend – no you’re not! SHE is!
  • robert pattinson hamburger – ok fakerpattz we know this one’s you!
  • unicorn jasper – He does speak eloquently about Twilight, but these guys might have something to say about that!
  • pornos – um, wrong place dudes. Unless we’re talking Rob, then head over here
  • sass family crest – Sass? Was this you?
  • does rob pattinson brush his teeth – this is still up for debate

More funnies after the cut… Continue…

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