Jacob & Bella: It's On

Dear Twihards,

I know that when you saw this picture today you said, “oh UC & Moon have got to Break that Down Vanity Fair style.” Duh. Of course we did.  And welcome Kristin, our fab forum mod & viagra spammer killer to today’s Breaking it down:

jakeandbella

Moon: OH. MY. GOD
UC
: what!? is this your first time seeing this picture?
Moon
: this pic!! no AGAIN. it’s my second time. It’s like almost a little much
Kristin
: it was my first time.
Moon
: VIRGIN- Relax! Breathe! Do what feels right, Kristin

Kristin: well he looks pissed
UC
: Well, he has a hard on
Kristin
: and she looks half dead
UC
: and he can’t do ANYTHING about it. And in her defense…. she is half dead…
Kristin
: and he totally has blue balls.
Moon
: Omg- I’m just staring
Kristin
: he’s like. “damnit Bella, I wanted to have to rip your shirt off and administer CPR!”
Moon
: like how’d they make a near drowning SEXY?

UC: I e-mailed The Quad earlier today and said this, “Can we speculate what’s going on during this image? cuz I don’t believe the book described a scene quite this sexy when Jake saves Bells, so what do we think? Took a lil’ shower together? Jacob is too tall to scrub his feet so Bella helped him out?’ Cuz it def seems a little more ‘sexytime in the shower’ than ‘i just saved your life from a vampire standing over you while you were drowning in the cold water’
UC
: EastFriend responded “He had his 1st wet dream about her, forcing him to take a cold shower. Bella stepped in to wash his back.
Or…
They were getting their Gene Kelly on. Just singin’ & dancin’ in the rain. Then Bella slipped & fell, of course, so Jake had to rescue her. It was a poignant moment, hence the serious expressions on their faces.
See? I can be dirty & clean! It’s a gift. Seeing both the sexy & pure sides of the same situation. ”

Kristin: Bella looks kind of “whaa just happened”- very damsel in distress. Makes me want to punch her. just a little.
Moon
: DO THAT NOW. DO HIM. Edward left your ass. DO IT
Moon
: dude bella & Edward are on WAY more than “a break”
Kristin
: she can blame it on the “near death experience” !
Moon
: he has to forgive you
Kristin
: I always have sex after I almost die.
Moon
: oh ‘oops he saved me and his tongue ended up in my mouth. ‘ OOPS. All i can imagine is a drops of water coming off his hair and hitting her
UC
: her ears look big
Moon
: such a hot visual
UC
: so do his muscles
Moon
: his nose looks big- look at his MOOBS

Kristen gets real honest after the jump Continue…

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New Moon Nudity

Dear guy who I had to look up on imdb because I forget your name Jamie Campbell Bower,

Welcome to the Twilight world- where you make a joke like “just took a dump on Rob Pattinson’s face” over Twitter and twihards all over the world take you seriously and call in UNICEF to intervene in what they think is a humanitarian crisis. OR You say this in an interview:

and end up getting all media & news reports to start discussing the “nudity” in New Moon surely giving Stephenie Meyer a heart attack that her ‘save it for marriage’ textbook called the Twilight saga is causing a scandal big enough to rival Nikki Reed’s sad attempt to prove to the world she is over Rob Pattinson by hooking up with the nastiest Greek shipping heir billionaire she could find. Then busy directors like Chris Weitz up to their eyeballs in post-production woes like editing 200 hours of half-naked guys on film have to waste their time and make a statement about the joke just so crazy fans will calm down, moms will agree that their 12 year olds can see the movie again and will reluctantly cancel their plans to show up at the movie theater with 12 of their closest friends in the sluttiest JC Penny has to offer with a wad of one dollar bills to throw at the movie screen. And you get forced (I’m assuming by Summit, who we love to blame) to tweet this:

jamienaked

Just an FYI, us “normal” fans can take a joke. We never thought it was true and we promise to never be offended at the thought of naked Robert Pattinson. However… I am really disappointed that it was all a joke, and here are my reasons why:

Peter-Facinelli-peter-facinelli-5262983-500-648

Peetah

Kellan-Lutz

Kellan

JacksonRathbone

Jax

alex-meraz-2

Alex

taylor_lautner240

Legal in Georgia

Big Daddy

Big Daddy

Rob

Rob

Maybe we’ll have better luck in Eclipse?
Love,
UnintendedChoice

Phew- It’s a hot cast. That’s what made me decide to post this. And the additions to Eclipse are hot too. Which new hottie is your fav!?

Follow that guy from New Moon Jamie Campbell Bower on twitter!

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The Forum
Moon gets sappy on Rob over at LTR

pics found on Starpulse.com and fanpop.com and google images

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Stuff guys say about Twilight and about me meeting Rob

This unicorn needs to call me. I need new content

This unicorn needs to call me. I need new content

Dear LTTers,

I have a confession to make. After 6 and 1/2 months of blogging at least once a day about Twilight-related stuff, sometimes it’s difficult to come up with content. So occasionally….. I force it. I’ll check my favorite Twilight Saga blogs: NewMoonMovie or TwiCrackAddict and read a headline like “Solomon Trimble: coming to a K-mart near you” and run to my husband and say “Great news! Solomon Trimble, the guy who played Sam (we think) in Twilight but didn’t get rehired b/c he wasn’t studly enough, is gonna be folding sheets in the Martha Stewart section in the Kmart up in Qtown.” Then I wait. What used to happen is that my husband would say something funny. Then I’d say “YES!” and quickly run to draft up a post on my computer. But he’s caught on. He no longer responds to me whenever I mention anything Twilight-related (However, he does respond whenever I mention Rob. He says “He’s a tool”)

So me catching “stuff guys say about Twilight” hasn’t been happening as naturally as it once did. However, it’s been my lucky week because I’ve just captured 3 gems:

1. My friend Jen e-mailed me a little story about the guy who sits next to her at work. He heard on the radio that Rob’s abs were airbrushed on in the New Moon Volterra scene and was appalled. Then this conversation happened between Jen, a girlfriend & her guyfriend:

Girlfriend: (saying to Jen) Hey Arizona, how you likin’ the rain? (UC Note: I can’t even count the number of ‘arizona how you likin’ the rain’ and ‘forks-like weather’ references I’ve heard recently in Pennsylvania. It hasn’t stopped raining for a month)
Guyfriend
: What are you girls talking about?
Jen
: Twilight
Guyfriend
: Oh geez. Yeah, rain…I hope he gets caught in the rain and it washes his airbrushed abs off. Maybe I’ll airbrush 3 extra feet on myself (Jen note: Joe is 5’4″ tall)

See what else guys say after the jump! Continue…

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Breaking down the New Moon Book cover

Dear fans of New Moon,

Do you miss The Quad? Yeah, we do too. Life happens. IT departments at work block chat and sisters-in-laws come to visit…sometimes exciting New Moon stuff happens and Moon & I don’t know where to turn. And then Calliope, one of our forum mods & the creator of the brilliant Twilight Theatre, happens to be there.. to save the day. And then breaking it down vanity-fair styles happen like this about the new New Moon picture:

Love,
UnintendedChoice & theMoonisDown

newmoonbookcoverThe New Picture
Moon: ok this might be a bit better than the movie poster. You KNOW this was a movie poster option
UC
: Can we mentioned Bella’s Wal-mart special tank top and how bella looks like a slutty fan fic bella
Calliope
: she so does
Moon
: shes defs a SENiOR in this picture
Calliope
: especially with the extra volume in the hair
UC
: grown-up
Moon
: no innocent junior
UC
: I know. Vidal sassoon
Calliope
: nono… paul mitchell. Alice left her with a supply
Moon
: Solomon Trimble gave her some of his hot oil treatments
Calliope
: so true. right before he got shipped off to a different tribe because he wasn’t studly enough.
Moon: the Quiluetes traded him for the nerdy wolf

UC: Do we wish we could zoom in on the WolfPack’s face? Cuz they’re hot? And I need me some dorky wolves?
Moon: YES!! I wanna see them close up
Calliope: I’m tempted to print it..on the BLUEPRINT printer at work. POSTER SIZE
UC: please please please and hang it up!  and send us a pic! and roll it up and send ME one!
Moon: Take a pic of you posing like Bella in front of it

Just wait… we’re about to discuss Eddie… after the jump Continue…

93 Commented


We may or may not be excited for New Moon

He works hard for the money... so hard for the money so you better treat him right!

He works hard for the money... so hard for the money so you better treat him right!

Caution: Extreme fangirl letter!

Dear Chris Weitz,

THIS IS WHY WE DO THIS! We blog for moments like today when we saw the ET promo videos for New Moon. Because we LOVE THIS SAGA and THIS is what it’s all about! (Believe it or not, THIS is what we blog for! Not forums, Not comments, Not haters, Not complainers but THIS!) It’s about The Characters! The Story! The Angst!

Is it possible that our fasting and prayers have worked? And that New Moon is going to meet or, gasp, SURPASS our expectations!? (Because if so, please let us know so we can pack a defibrillator to bring with us on opening night!)

Always the Jacob never the Edward

Always the Jacob never the Edward

Could we actually walk away from the theater saying less about how hot Rob was and say more things like “Remember that moment, after Edward leaves, when, in the book it’s 4 blank pages? Wasn’t what Chris did visually to represent that emptiness just perfect?”

And will this theme ring true throughout the whole film:

Time passes. Even when it seems impossible. Even when each tick of the second hand aches like the pulse of blood behind a bruise. It passes unevenly, in strange lurches and dragging lulls, but pass it does. Even for me.

Edward WHO?

Edward WHO?

Will we feel that pain?

And, OMG, will we actually, seriously contemplate TEAM JACOB?? Because honestly (and don’t tell Rob this) we ARE considering it. (And if we wouldn’t get thrown in jail for thinking it out loud, we’d be considering Taylor too! (we’re still thinking it.. despite the risks- did you SEE that tight thermal he was wearing? GOOD CALL CHRIS!!))

Just from those quick clips, Moon almost broke a window in her office from her freak out. She slapped her desk and yelled stuff out loud. And UC felt JUST like Glow Worm (ya know, the affectionate name we gave the craziest Twilight

Repeat it with me... he is 17... he is 17!

Repeat it with me... he is 17... he is 17!

fan we’ve ever seen. No, we won’t tell you who she is.. it’s too mean). She gasped.. she jumped.. her eyes were wide! She squeed so loud that her husband ran in to find out what was wrong.. and all she said was… JACOB!

And pure WIN during the part when Jacob told Bella he wasn’t giving up- he was wearing a pretty half-ponytail! We want to comb his hair with our “My Little Pony” combs!

This is when we can’t keep it contained- the Fangirl in both of us. There’s nothing we can do to stop it. We can try to pretend all day long that we’re too cool for freak outs.  We can write little sarcastic, snarky blogs, but at the end of the day, when it comes down to it- we’re as nerdy about it as 14 year old girls. And we don’t care anymore. We’re outting ourselves.

We’re gonna let the wild, out of control, Glow Worm-style anticipation begin! We’re gonna stop this “I may or may not like Twilight” shit… We LIKE it. We LOVE it. And That’s Normal

Cannot FREAKIN’ wait for November 20th,
UnintendedChoice & theMoonisDown

Entertainment Tonight videos that warranted this wild outburst after the cut!
Continue…

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