Moon & UC’s Excellent Adventure Vol. 2: The Stephenie Meyer Interview

Dear LTTers,

UC POV

4:00 am, somewhere in Pennsylvania, an alarm clock is set to go off.
Silence
4:15 am, somewhere in PA, a back-up alarm clock is set to go off
Silence
4:30 am, somewhere, a “you’re an idiot if you’re not up by now, but I’ll set this just in case’ alarm clock is set to go off
Silence

Never drive faster that your guardian Larry can fly

6:30 am, Mr. Choice awakes to find me still in our bed, panic tears & wailing ensue. I rush, with teeth brushed (not hair) & no make-u applied, to the airport 1 hour away to try to catch a flight that leaves in ½ hour. After being told there are no more LA flights with room, oh wait, we found 1 seat in first class for $1500, oh no- sorry that flight won’t get you in until 7 pm, oh wait, just kidding we found one seat on the next flight to LA, I arrive in LA only 2 hours later than I was supposed to. Crisis Averted! I attribute it to one thing and one thing only- Larry411. The Twitter “celebrity” was on my flight and I feel as thought the universe knew that having me & Larry, two of the most important Twilight people EVER, on the plane was a necessity. (Yeah, it’s going to be awkward next time I run into him in Philly after I tweet him today showing him this picture I took while sitting 2 seats down from him, trying to work up the nerve to say “Hi, I’m UC, I like Twilight” but deciding against it b/c snot was pouring out of my nose due to previous crying spell.)

Moon POV

Being woken up at 5am by about 20 text messages is never a good thing. Unless the person sending them is Robert Pattinson looking for a booty call. This was not the case Thursday morning.

Since UC’s 2390429034 alarms failed and she missed her flight, I spent those extra hours running around doing errands, finding a blasted voice recorder so we could immortalize the interview forever and ever and make Stephenie Meyer saying “2nd hand embarrassed” (oh yes, she did!) our outgoing voice mail message.

After fetching UC from LAX we busted a groove over to Westwood so we could meet up with Twifans and Twilight Series Theories for lunch, which was deeeeeeeeeeeeelicious. And of course we debated what we thought would happen during the interview which was pretty much us saying we weren’t about to stay on topic (ie Bree and Eclipse).

*thinking* holy crap holy crap holy crap what are we gonna ask?!

So the countdown to SM time had begun and we hadn’t pow wow-ed about our potential questions for the NEXT day. So of course we ran down to the pool to get our sun on, which was conveniently behind a building thus making us shiver, and run through questions and potential scenarios. While we pondered what our first question would be: Jorts vs Tweed or Big Daddy vs Dick Pattz, some of the other sites came up to talk about how they thought it would go down and some of their potential questions. And well, you know us, we’re not exactly rules followers or the kind of people who want to know, in detail, what happened in Edward’s mind on page 78 so we got a bit spooked. Ok, we freaked!

It's everywhere!! We can't escape!

UC: You guys really put on the pressure! We knew that if we went in there asking when Fred’s birthday was (May 17, 1984, btw) you’d kill us. And rightfully so. We started having these joint, day-time nightmares of us asking a funny question and Stephenie saying, “I refuse to answer unless you somehow turn that really hilarious joke into a question about the intricacies of Bree’s life.” (If you think for one second I actually know what Fred’s birthday is, you’re fired as an LTT reader)

Moon: So we called an emergency dinner of the Los Angeles branch of the LTT family. We needed to be talked down by The Font and White Yorkie. Over sushi of course. Well, we ate sushi and the Font watched the Lakers and White Yorkie bailed on our asses.

UC POV

Since this was my first time meeting the guys, I’ll jump in to report that #1 they are huggers, #2 The Font wore some sort of 7 year old boys’ comic book or teenage-mutant ninja turtle t-shirt and #3 White Yorkie has action figure boxes on his bedroom walls. I assumed they were from Action-Figure Edward, but I didn’t ask.

The guys TOTALLY got us pumped up. They made us laugh, they reminded us that we’re not expected to be like any other site but ourselves & threatened to never do another LTT podcast or even SPEAK to us again if we weren’t absolutely cool. Oh, and they told us we better make Stephenie laugh.

Picture of us suitable for hanging next to your family members (that's what the note said!)

Later that night, after ordering a bottle of water from room service & being served Evian like it was Don Perignon, we wrapped our gifts for Stephenie, Moon finished up 2 mixed CDs she made her (Yes- she rules), and I said “I’m so tired I think I’m going to die” about 3,000 times.

OH NO IT'S TOMORROW!!!!!!!!!!

Moon: And when we got in bed we got Twilosophical & talked about how we just wanted to be true to ourselves and to the blog. If the interview was going to be lame and controlled, we were still going to TRY to ask the questions we wanted and all the LTTers wanted to have answered!

THE BIG DAY (after the jump!)

Oh heeeeeyyy, just gettin' all prettied up

UC: We primped until we could primp no more, grabbed all 1,200 of our bags and hit the elevator. And when we finally walked into the room where the event was taking place, there she was- Stephenie Meyer.. just hanging out and talking to the girls from Twilight Series Theories. There wasn’t a halo around her head and angels weren’t playing trumpets like we expected! Stephenie was just chatting with the other fansite like they were the dearest friends.

Would it be considered inappropriate if I puked in that gift bag?!

Moon: I don’t know where YOU were, UC, but that’s not the Stephenie I saw. Where I was standing, a light shown down and a choir of angels sang. You know how in kid’s Bibles angels have those halos around their heads and look like glowing neon necklaces from concerts? Well, they’re real and she had one. Who knew Zondervan kids illustrated Bible had it right all along? In all actuality she pretty much looked like one of my girlfriends only with amazing skin and great lips (super insider info: she wears the tinted Burts Bees. I know this because I spied it as we reapplied before the group photos. I had the pomegranate & she had the tinted stick) and we talked about how we’d be washed out if we didn’t put some color on our lips.

UC: Despite being told we could put down our stuff, grab some food and take our seats, Moon & I stood and waited our turn. Since we were still pretty convinced that this was all an elaborate set-up to get us in person to publically embarrass us for making fun of the fandom, we wanted to get that over early so we could maybe hit the pool for a few hours before we had to check out of the hotel.

That wasn’t the plan.

In fact, if there is an opposite of that plan, this is it: As we were hugging hello & introducing ourselves, Stephenie said to us, “I just have to tell you girls- I read your site every day.” We responded with:

“What? Are yo- NO! NO! How, I don’t even know what you’re say- How Ho- Whadya whayda you talking about, yo- want me to go away- I, I, I can’t, I can’t I I can’t just leave – I… (fade out)”

And as if she wanted to prove it because there was NO WAY we believed her, she mentioned how Alice_NaA’s letter about finally understanding Bella’s pain was so great & that Melissa Rosenberg would look great in the pants I wanted to wear so badly to the interview. No seriously, Stephenie reads LTT. Which is cool, but we REALLY would’ve been impressed had she set up a lunch at the Olive Garden with Big Daddy. I mean, come on Steph! You know what we really want.

We sat around with the group chatting for a bit. We were supposed to be eating. I’m pretty sure I ate one of those seeds that are on the skin a strawberry & Moon ate a piece of lettuce. Or maybe it was an ice cube. After about 20 minutes, Stephenie’s assistant (who was awesome, btw, and we’re not just saying that b/c she reads LTT yes we are. We just really liked her ballerina sweater.) said we should officially start. So we pretended to turn on our voice recorder (it was already on) and opened up our notes like real reporters.

But before any questions could be asked, we all breathed a sigh of relief as Stephenie said she wanted to address the huge vampire elephant in the room- Midnight Sun- since she was sure it was the ONLY thing our readers wanted to know about (She was right) Basically, and we have to re-listen to our audio recording in case she actually muttered to Moon (who was sitting next to her) “I have it done I’ll get it to you guys next week,” but she hasn’t completed it, she wants to eventually, but she’s vampired-out. Between editing scripts, dealing with the movies & taking care of Pancho, who recent turned & has been so demanded with wanting her neck from time to time for a snack, she has no creative energy left to give to Midnight Sun what it deserves. It was REALLY GOOD to hear her response. She knows how important that story is to her readers- she REALLY KNOWS- and she said if she wrote it now, it wouldn’t be good, and she doesn’t want to do that. We asked if her mom is still asking her to finish it, and apparently she has stopped. She DID mention reverse psychology works on her. If someone says she can’t do something or shouldn’t do something, she usually wants to do it. We really don’t know why we spent more than 5 minutes talking about Midnight Sun. It’s such a stupid concept & really was the worst 12 chapters we have ever read of anything ever.

After the stupid conversation about that stupid Midnight Sun story, we were up for the FIRST QUESTION. What would we ask? Would we delve into the thematic message of Bree? Would we ask for Rob Pattinson’s phone number? Would we embarrass The Font & White Yorkie so badly that we’d never see their action figure walls or comic book tshirts ever again? Nope, we’d just use a swear word and straight up break the ice by having her make a choice that was soooo LTT. After all: “it all begins with a choice…” But more on that later…

Stephenie has a candor about her that is just so real- she makes you feel like you’ve been friends for forever. She answered questions for four hours without seeming tired, taking a bite of food, getting up to pee 12,000 times like UC did or admitting she was actually Team Jacob. (We tried to make her slip up & confess!) Honestly, we think there wasn’t much Stephenie wouldn’t say. It was like having a famous friend- one who could tell you what Rob looks like at a 5 am call time.

Thank God, that's over!!

We have so much more to tell you- like the time Stephenie said, “Oh yeah- his name is The Font, right?” And when she said “That’s 2nd-hand embarrassing” while looking at us and when she helped us explain to the one guy in the room, Matt from Twilight Source, that he’s called a “Unicorn.” (Has it hit you yet that Stephenie actually reads LTT!!!) Plus we know how she really feels about Twilight tattoos and Fan Fiction, and the title of “Letters to Twilight” in her bookmarks bar. We could just change LTT to “Letters to everyone about our interview with Stephenie Meyer” because we have enough to talk about for at least 7 more years. Oh and WAIT until you see the pictures we took… we may have done the most epic thing ever…. to Stephenie Meyer….

Love,
UnintendedChoice & Themoonisdown

So…. while we were SO excited to hear that Stephenie reads LTT, we are not freaked out… It’s not going to make us change who we are or how we write- what it WILL hopefully make us do is write better & funnier. We’re not going to change so you shouldn’t either. So don’t write love letters to her in the comments or feel weird about stuff you say or have said in the past. Be yourselves! We love you & she will too!

Our internet game is ridiculous: LTR, The Forum, Twitter, The Store

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