Cashing in on the Twilight/New Moon connection for a "good cause?"

Dear Twilight cast members-

Good on you guys for lending your celebrity to a good cause! It you’re going to be chased around by paparazzi and idolized by folks all over the world you might as well give a voice to a great cause. And you are! Witness the latest in go gooders…

Angie got back!

Dear Christian,

What a classy homage to the horror that is the fur trade industry while gently alluring to the fact that you’re in Twilight. The forest, the mist, the Twilight font and what else says vampire and dead furry animals than blood splatters all over the PETA ad?

Too bad you play a human.

XO
Moon

PS nice booty lady!
c
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Doin' it for the kids!

Dear Kristen,

You make it harder and harder for me to keep up this facade of not liking you when you go and make an appearance at the Juvenile Diabetes Research Foundation walk during the middle of a busy press tour for New Moon when you could have been taking a nap or eating cheetos.

Can you break out the mullet or act surly again, please?

XO
Moon

Follow the jump to see Taylor work it for a good cause…
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How to be a fun celebrity

Dear Twilight cast members who are absolutely no fun (read: Kristen Stewart & Robert Pattinson),

What’s your problem? Can’t you have a little fun? Sure it’s annoying having people run after you so you can sign a book that you had absolutely no part in writing. And some fans (read: most fans) are absolutely crazy, but it’s your life. And it’s not going away. So why not laugh about it? Otherwise, you’re just going to be running away for forever. And while all that running may produce a kick-ass gluteus maximus, who needs tight buns when you’re just hiding away in a dark hotel room all day long? (if you’re doing something with those tight buns in the dark hotel room, that’s a different story…)

If you want to trade positions, I’m willing. (positions in life- I’m no longer talking about tight buns) I’d be such a fun celebrity.. like Fach- Peter Facinelli. That dude knows how to be a celebrity the right way. He joined twitter, started tweeting back & forth with fans and before you knew it, some dude he knows is in a bikini on the street in Hollywood! Peter’s a good time!

I’ve put together a list of ideas on how to be a fun celebrity. Take my advice & your life will be so much more joy-filled, less stressful and you’ll be able to show off that gluteus maximus in public, instead of hiding away in a hotel room.

• 

  Kellan, do you think that photographer would sign my book?

  When you’re running away from the paparazzi and you jump into a cab, kiss the cabbie.

• Tired of people thinking you’re with so-and-so just because you were seen together near the used lingerie section of VanCity’s finest thrift store? Hold hands with your bodyguard. And skip. (if you’re feeling extra funny, slip your new, used panties over the bodyguard’s head)
• Carry around a Twilight book and have one of your cast members sign it right in front of the paps. OR ask the paps to sign it.
• Stop fearing the paps- LOVE on them. Carry around a notebook & write little messages for them. “I like it when you call me Big Papa” (tell Big Daddy Lautner about that- he’ll get a kick out of it) or ‘Breaking News! I’m a hermaphrodite” or something simple like “I love the paps.” If you’re not feeling up to risking ending up as the latest freak mentioned in the National Enquirer, write about a charity- “fightpovery.org”
• Get an official twitter. You wouldn’t even have to tweet often. People would still write you every day and wait for you to say “Damn that steak was good” or “My dirty hair is starting to itch” (psst there is even a setting where you can turn OFF replies from people you don’t follow! Protection from the fangirls!) Plus you could tweet lies like “Headed to 100 monkeys tonight- Man i Love them!” and instead run back to that thrift store because you forgot to pick up matching flannel pajama pants.
• Drunk Tweet. Billy Black Burke (that was not an intentional mistake) does it the best:
  

  Just sitting here in my hotel room with uncomfortable images of PFach and Lutz together in a tandem lotus position. mmmm, dreamy.

  What the…?

I love little boys, and Twitpic

• Once you have a twitter, get yourself a Twitpic account. Photoshop yourself with a mustache. Or photoshop your co-stars with a mustache. Upload the pictures.
• Be touchy-feely with fangirls. Well, the hot ones anyway. I happen to think Kellan should be a lil more choosy with the fans he loves on. Pick the hottest ones (we do exist), get a lil smooch and maybe, if you’re feeling dangerous, even a lil’ more. Or kiss your co-stars who don’t get enough attention. Have you SEEN Christian Serratos lately? Dang…..
• Put it out there on Craigslist like this guy. Don’t be ashamed if you have a strong want for a gorgeous Asian boy. And even if you don’t want a gorgeous Asian boy, pretend that you do. Cause you know that some pap will reply to the ad and set-up a date with you so they can catch you and sell the story. But the joke will be on them. Dress up like a vampire (I hear you may know somewhere you can swipe some clothes & make-up), set up some candles & romantic music, get your video camera ready with a live feed to your tinychat for twitter and open the door and say “Mama taught me how to make you ‘meow’ ” The pap might not get  it, but we all will.

Stop being a sourpuss couple. Be FUN celebrities! Learn from Fach, Kellan, TayTay and whoever is 26 and looking for a lil’ gaysian lovin’ to pass the time!

Happy to help!
UnintendedChoice

Who are your fav fun Twi-lebrities?

Discuss who wants a gaysian lover on The Forum
See if Rob did anything funny over on LTR

Pic Source and Thanks to Fatima for mustache-Kristen!)

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Happy Labor Day from the hot Twilight cast

Dear LTTers in countries other than the US,

Today is Labor Day in the United States. That means instead of working we’ll be stuffing ourselves with hot dogs and throwing up on volleyball courts. (Yes, just like Memorial Day and July 4th– we’re not very creative). For LTT and Moon & I, this means we let other people do the work for us (you may have noticed a trend all weekend long…… we started the celebration early!)

Again, the gals in Rob’s Flat daily chat in The Forum have given us the goods with a whole other slew of Twi-cast Porn:

Daaaanngggg ladies!

Happy Labor Day from your lazy friends UC & Moon! We’ll be back in full force tomorrow! Promise!

Love,
UnintendedChoice

Talk about your volleyball score on The Forum
See who did our work for us over on LTR

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Twilight has the hottest cast

Dear very understanding LTTers,

You know when you have one of those nights as a vampire blogger when you know you’re going to have a late night dinner with friends, so you prepare ahead and draft up a quick idea of a great “Twilosophy” for the next morning, send a quick e-mail off to a group of vampire experts to consult for ideas & funny one-liners for the post you’ll work on when you come back from the late night dinner, no matter what time of night it is? Have you been there? Did you also forget to consider the amount of wine you’d consume at said late night dinner?

What does one do in this case when you get home after consuming 7 bottles of wine between 6 friends in 3 hours and the draft you so wonderfully started writing before you left for the dinner apparently isn’t as great as you’d hoped and only contains 3 run-on sentences and a rant about Rob Pattinson needing to come out of hiding?

Panic. That’s what you do.

Until you remember that you saved a very special post for the very special day when you would make a very special move and dance in the kitchen of your friend’s home to Lady Gaga while singing into an empty bottle of wine while being swung around by your friend Ryan who is declaring, not so subtly, “UC- can you see the Unicorns? [he means real unicorns] Do you want to ride a unicorn!? Rob Pattison has the head of a unicorn. Look- it’s Rob Pattison with a unicorn head. And he is biting pillows.” [True story. All of it.] To all of you girls in the Rob’s Flat Chat over on The Forum, you saved my ass with your amazing Twi-Cast Porn.

Twilight has the hottest cast, and you girls made them so much hotter!

Enjoy these while I enjoy my hangover,
UnintendedChoice

Many More after the jump! Continue…

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Twilight Twitterers

Dear Twitter,

Twilight has taken over your world. Seriously. I’m a social networking whore and have had Twitter since the beginning of Twitter-time when it sucked and was wayyy boring, so seeing it BLOW UP in the last year has been insane. And I think it has a lot to do with the Twilight saga. Even when we first started tweeting for our blogs (Letter2Twilight) it was kinda boring. We’d tweet about a new post, check out tweets from other blogs & media sites we follow and occasionally have some interaction with a follower, but now? Full-blown conversations are had on Twitter (yeah, you thought having a 140 character limitation would prevent that!) People spend hours upon hours in the twitterverse- and trends can be manipulated and are… often. (FYI- it was not a natural occurrence that SamBradley became a trending topic!)

You can thank (or blame) the Twilight world for this.  I bet, in a months time, we see 5 Twilight-related words as ‘trends.’ The Twilight fanbase is p-o-w-e-r-f-u-l.

And now, almost the whole Twilight cast is on Twitter.  I love when celebs tweet because it makes them more “real,” and kinda approachable (even though most probably turn off the option of reading the @replies from people they don’t follow) I was perusing the twitter accounts of the cast, and I realized you can learn a lot about people based on what they tweet. Stuff like: Jamie Campbell Bower is on vaca, has a blackberry and clearly drunk tweets. And Anna Kendrick is apparently not only very new to Twitter, but also to the world wide web, because she tweeted that she just found out that Bon Iver was going to be on the New Moon soundtrack- old news! and Justin Chon I don’t really get. Last I checked he was an actor who has had some small roles here in there, but- is he famouser than I realize?  The kid goes EVERYWHERE- Some days it’s “In Hawaii.” Then “In Paris.” “In London” etc. etc. etc. Traveling like that costs a lot of money, and last I checked small roles pay shockingly little!

Billy Burke slays me. I dunno what the freak he’s talking about most of the time:

Went AWOL again for a couple days. Got lost in the woods and made really good friends with some toothless banjo players. Don’t worry…

my virginity is still in tact.

I wonder how long it will take for it to come out that RPatz and I are dating. Apparently I’m completely captivated by him.

hmm, i see the burning question is already up on the Lexicon. the little hairy monster does indeed have a life of its own. and yes its REAL

Seriously, read his tweets- he’s hilarious and I can only assume quite often drunk tweeting. Love that his publicist clearly has bigger clients that he/she’s worried about and hasn’t noticed yet that Billy sometimes says stuff any PR person would freak out about.

So I’m just writing to say ‘you’re welcome’ on behalf of all Twilight fans. I’ve checked- and I’m not sure there is another “fandom” that uses Twitter the way the Twilight world does. We’re so happy to help you by using your free app while you sit in an office with your millions in venture capitalist money and try to figure out how to make a profit!

You’re welcome,
UnintendedChoice

Do you ‘tweet?’ Do you feel like following celebs makes them seem more ‘real?’ Who else do you follow besides Twi people? And seriously- have YOU seen other ‘fandom’ groups on Twitter to the extend the Twi-world is!?

All the Twilight twitterers after the jump Continue…

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