Jackson Rathbone- he does highschool boy well..

Dear Jackson,

It’s been awhile since we’ve had a chat (approximately one year on Sunday, actually) and I miss hearing your southern drawl. In fact, now that I think about it- I haven’t really heard that drawl in an entire year- the last time I saw you on screen in Eclipse (well, except for the one other time I saw Eclipse in July and then when the DVD first came out (yes I’ve only seen it 3 times.. Shhh))

Anyway, I’m so used to poking fun of whatever you have going on- namely your catfish look & 100 Monkeys. So imagine my surprise when I hear you have a new web series (airing on Facebook? Really? We’re there now?) & I watched the trailer and… well, it doesn’t look that bad

I’m into the action/crime show thing. Maybe this is a little too ‘shoot-em-up-machine-gun-style’ for me (I tend to like my violence more with serial killer types. Or Vampires), but it’s got the young, high school “I really want to impress this girl” thing going on that is pretty intriguing. Plus you look so cute as a high school boy! Your dorkiness is so charming. I want to give you a towel when you get dunked in the toilet & scream at the bullies that you could kick their asses!

Watching you play a teenage boy again gave me a flash back to when I FIRST saw you on The OC… and that quickly turned into a timeline of your career in my mind- and mostly, a timeline of your hair. So without further ado:

You were born in Singapore to parents who were most likely Missionaries because once after a super duper sleuth & successful online stalking venture*, Moon found out your parents knew Kellan’s parents & then found out the name of Kellan’s home church & we put two and two (plus some political contributions we found from one of your families) together and figured out we’re pretty sure Kellan’s home church supported your family when they were in the mission field.

Your given first name is actually Monroe (FUN NEW FACT I JUST LEARNED) and you are approximately 1.5 years younger than me.

You first rose to fame (although it’s like your 5th IMDB entry) through 2 episodes as a ‘throw-away’ character on The OC. But you weren’t throw-away to me. I was that obsessed with The OC that I actually remembered your role when it was announced you would be Jasper Hale!

And dannggg you play a cute teenage boy (I think you were a teenage boy here!)

At one point you looked like a Dirty—- [TIME OUT for a full confession to say that I was going to say you looked like a “Dirty Sanchez” which is what I think of when I see that picture. But it didn’t sound quite right so I decided to look it up & WHOA- that’s not what I meant. So I thought maybe I meant “Dirty Sancho?” But turns out WHOA I definitely didn’t mean that. So basically what I’m trying to say is: You look like a really nice guy who probably drives a motorcycle & has a GED, is respectful to woman and maybe just maybe has some relatives in Mexico??? I’m just trying to be PC here….. you know how good I am at that**]

Then one day you landed the role of Jasper Hale- newly minted vegetarian vampire- and strutted your stuff into the mobile home make-up trailer that doubled as Catherine Hardi’s “Home away from home” where she slept every night during filming ready to put on your blonde wig- since you read that Jasper Hale was blonde. But instead they gave you a perm & dumped a bunch of powder on your hair:

Shortly thereafter, I see THE MAN in the flesh for the first time (and am also scarred for forever by my first and only experience with The 100 Monkeys) You’re sweaty but danggg you’re cute:

Then you freak the sh*t out of all of us by looking prettier than any girl I know as Amanda Jackson on an episode of Criminal Minds:

I’m still not convinced that this is a secret female twin of yours that your parents keep locked in the basement, with a Bible.

And just when we thought Jasper’s look couldn’t get any worse than the baby powder & perm, you got a wig (I think? I hope!!?). And it WAS worse:

Which FORCED me to ask you if we were going to see Jasper in a “Red Mullet” wig in Eclipse

(I can’t do it. I can’t watch myself in this again to find out where exactly I ask you that. However, I did just decide I miss that dress. I’m pretty sure it’s in my sister’s closet. I think it’s because I borrowed it from her, but still. I’d like it back)

THANKFULLY, we didn’t have a red mullet (although I DO see tinges of Red. I’ll take credit for that (despite the fact it was done filming long before I thought of it) although this look is a little “drowned rat” for my liking….I know, I know. I’m hard to please:

And now we’re back to present day & your role in Aim High. And, surprisingly, I have little complaints. I mean zero. You’re back to playing that cute high-school boy a la The OC & it WORKS!

You do dorky, high school boy well!

We’ve been through so much together. I’ve said some mean honest things about the way you look & your terrible, horrible band- but I’m glad we’re in this place one year after you first got to see me make these horrible faces in person:

Click for ultimate "WTF were you thinking, UC" moments

Maybe I’ll see you on Facebook!,

UnintendedChoice

*We’re about 57% serious about all of this. 100% serious about the fact that we online stalked that hard.
**I LOVE Mexico. I am still Facebook friends with approximately 5 friends I made in Mexico when I was 16 and went there on a missions trip. Yep- I did missions work- Kellan & Jackson– we can swap stories!

Our internet game is ridiculous: LTR, The Forum, Twitter, The Store

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News Dump: The one with a lotta Sundance and a lotta Renesmee

Double feature now showing!

Dear LTT-ers,

It’s time to catch up on the news that only needs a sentences worth of discussion. Yes, it’s time for another News Dump! So put on your Bella jacket and mittens cause there’s a whole lotta Sundance!

• At first I thought Elizabeth Reaser was at Sundance to promote her flick Homework, then I realized they just hired her so they could screen the movies on her huge foreFIVEhead. Dang. PS It’s Oregano!!

• In between holding still for the screenings, Elizabeth talked about Kristen and Mackenzie. Don’t bother watching, it’s everything you expect: “Kristen scared me!” and “She looks like their child!” Boom, saved you 4 minutes!

• Apparently it must be a Holy Trinity week of filming cause Charlie Bewley is ALSO at Sundance and he dropped this awesome gem when asked about Renesmee:

“I imagine if Robert Pattinson and Kristen Stewart had a kid it’d be like this grungy…awkward and shy kind of thing,” jokes Charlie Bewley, who plays Demetri in the vampire movie franchise.

Dare to NAIR ladies

• I’m sure it’s a BIG DEAL that artist Richard Phillips included Rob, Kristen and Dakota on his “Most Wanted” list and created pop images of them but I’m not so sure the girls appreciate the weird shadows on their upper lips that look oddly like mustaches.

• WHO wasn’t at Sundance? Chaske Spencer ALSO dropped by the gifting suites to debut his new hair and announce he joined Fall Out Boy and will be quitting BD and touring this spring with the band. Then he bequeathed the role of Sam back to Solomon Trimble who clocked out at Home Depot and jumped on Cathi Hardi’s private jet for Sundance. Free shiz it free shiz however you get it.

• Bella’s house was pulled out of storage (a Vancouver Twimom’s garage) and reconstructed over the last few days. It looks more like a Sears Siding commercial or the AFTER tornado view of Dorothy’s house in Kansas than the home of the Swans.

Things that are important to note from this video:
1. Jackson’s Jasper hair is back. The REAL Jasper hair. Like Twilight Jasper hair. We may need to get a muffin basket together for the BD hair folks
2. The 100 Monkey have a REAL, ACTUAL Tour bus???
3. In 5 years Jackson may be on Dancing with the Stars… or Dancing with the hands-y fans.
4. Who does Jackson give HJ’s to regularly at MTV that the 100 Monkeys keep showing up on this MTV videos?
5. Jackson seems to have dropped the totally over the top accent plus side mouth talking thing a bit. He must read LTT. *Hi Jacky!*
6. That one dude totally wishes he was Jackson. Sorry dude jumping around in the back who’s name I don’t know. Enjoy it while it lasts!
7. Does Jackson have one suitcase fully devoted to his WEIRD hat collection?

• If you weren’t scared about bringing Breaking Dawn to the big screen you will be after you see this fan art I dug up over at Twifans. WOAH. Someone hold me.

• BREAKING NEWS: Still no new set pictures or actual evidence that they’re doing anything in Baton Rouge. SHOCKING.

Off to the gifting suites… I mean Sundance!
Themoonisdown

Srsly how are 100 Monkeys still being featured on MTVonline on the regular? I don’t get it.I was mean about Liz’s fivehead but for reals, side sweep, am I right? What say you?

Our internet game is ridiculous: LTR, The Forum, Twitter, The Store

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Twilight eats the month of June (and spits out a SUPERFAN) Part 1

Dear month of June,

I wondered where you went. And then I remembered. You went to Twilight.

First there was that time we met Stephenie Meyer which was kinda cool. I mean meeting a sort-of-hero, someone who inspired us to be who we’ve become, reason we’ve gotten through many of the days for the past year and 1/2? Yeah…. no biggie. We made some videos. Try not to love us too much:

After the epic meeting I put on a new shirt (Thanks Moon!) hopped on a red eye flight home to Philadelphia where I arrived at 6 am. Then I packed some final boxes because friends & family showed up at 8 am to move us ah hour away. I have no recollection of that day.

But I love British Boys....

Oh WAIT, before the British shirt & the red eye & the moving, Moon & I laid at the pool & wrote an article for CREME magazine in New Zealand. They are a teen magazine with whom we’ve become friendly & they wanted to hear about our experience with Stephenie. More on that later.

After 6 days in my new house, it was time to put on my SUPERFAN face. Basically a few weeks prior I got a phone call from my roommate from college who runs Urlesque.com which is owned by AOL which owns Moviefone.com. Moviefone was doing some secret Twilight events, one is in Philly. Did I want to go!? HECK YES! Then she said she could probably get me involved. Would I like to be? HECK YES. Somehow, I end up becoming a SUPERFAN which was actually QUITE fun- I got to interview Jackson Rathbone! SUPERFAN WHAT!?

I was worried about what to wear to interview Jackson. I tried this on but it didn’t seem right….

I dragged along some friends and my sister, who I made promise wouldn’t embarrass me, thought that getting a wolfpck tattoo would hold up her end of the bargain (Which I called The Cullen Crest- #FanFail)

Funny story- after the Jackson deal we went to an art show at a loft down the street from my house in Philly- the artist complimented my sister & her friends on their tattoos & asked if they were FRIENDSHIP tattoos. She thought they were real. As any regular LTT reader would know, you’re supposed to respond, “yes, yes that is a friendship tattoo” but noooo she admitted they were wolfpack tattoos & confessed I was a SUPERFAN.

But first this happened after the jump: Continue…

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Time for a Newsdump: Everything NOT Twilight related aka Kellan shows us his Calvins!

Yo, it's about that time to bring forth the rhythm and the rhyme. I'm gonna get mine so get yours, I wanna see sweat comin' out ya pores!

Dear LTT-ers

I was just lamenting (yes it was quite sorrowful) on Twitter that there was simply NO news about Twilight out right now and that makes things awfully boring… but then I started researching and there’s TONS of non-Twilight specific news that our favorite friends are in… so let’s get to it!

• In the best news in the history of the world category: Kellan Lutz will be the new Marky Mark for Calvin Klein. Can’t wait to see if “nothing gets between him and his Calvins” besides his mini New Testament Bible. Fingers crossed for a Kellan cover of “Good Vibrations“

• The trailer for “The Runaways” comes out and I can’t help but think two things-  ONE: they look like little girls playing dress up and TWO: I hope Dakota gets to punch someone

Che-Che-Che-Cherry BOMB!!!

Wait, this isn't the Maxim cover shoot!

• This is the prom dress you see on the rack at Goodwill and think, dude that would be perfect for my prom scene in “Can’t Buy Me Love” Halloween Costume (just right for doing the African Anteater dance in!)

• The theme of Rob and Emilie de Ravin’s Remember Me photoshoot for Vogue is “a date at LACMA (Los Angeles County Museum of Art)” why do I picture Rob showing Emilie his favorite works of art: The Kramer or Dogs Playing Poker?

Follow the cut for more news, less catfish, more abage for the cabbage and one special tatt00
Continue…

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Breaking down my Twilight memories

Dear Twilight,

Wow… you have really changed my life. I’ve been doing a lot of self reflecting this week since it’s our anniversary week, and I’ve been thinking back to a year ago at the start of it all. Moon & I are extremely bummed that we can’t locate that very first chat we had on 12/8/08 when we decided to start the blogs, but in my searching for that first conversation, I’ve come across a gem. Way back on 11/25/2008, Moon was going through her first read of the Twilight saga, and I was SO excited to finally have a friend to discuss the series with! I laughed re-reading this conversation, realizing how far we’ve come, how much we’ve changed and yet, how little has really changed! I’m gonna stop talking about it and instead, I’m gonna break down one of the first conversations Moon & I ever had about Twilight… vanity fair style!

My “Break down” is italicized between the lines of conversation and it’s green. Green is (what?) GOOD

Someday will cover our faces with that ribbon...

Losing Moon’s virginity

UC: oh miss Moon HI! did you read my blog yet? My review on Twilight the movie? because I forgot you didn’t finish book 3… *spoiler alert*
Book 3? Really UC? No one calls it that. It’s Eclipse
Moon: Thats where I just clicked on! About to read it!
UC: NOOO Stop! Until you finish the series…. I don’t want to give it away!!!
Moon: But I’m halfway through Eclipse? Don’t read it?
UC: Don’t- just because I give away my favorite part!! A part you’ll love
It involves the guy who runs around in jorts warming up the heart-breaker in a tent while the cold one looks on!
Moon: Oh man! I can’t wait. I didn’t read any last nite because I wanted to save it for the plane tonight!!
What? Moon? Is that you? The one who has been tempted to read my blog posts before they post in the morning and has been known to sneak in fanfic at opportune times- like during work or while at church? You WAITED for Eclipse!?
UC: oh yay! Good Idea
You sound 12, UC, saying “Yay” like that. Plus that’s not a good idea
UC: I forgot how good Eclipse was! I think I might read the last 1/2 again before I start Breaking Dawn 🙂 I’m such a loser/really awesome
The phrase you’re looking for is “That’s Normal”
Moon: TOTALLY awesome.
Welcome to the 80s
Moon: yea I’m LOVING Eclipse- might be favorite
It stays your favorite
Moon: Then I’ll probably get Breaking Dawn this week sometime
You’ll try, but every store will be out of it. So you’ll look hopelessly for a week

The one where we prophecize

UC: How long will you be at home with your parents? Until Sunday?
Moon: Monday I come back- decided to make a vacay out of it
UC: nice!!
Moon: stalk stephenie meyer
UC: Oh yay! She lives there, I forgot!
Oh UC… next thing you’ll tell me you don’t know Rob Pattinson’s middle name.
Moon: It’s so sad but I’m so hoping for some odd reason I see her
That hope never dies
Moon: I’ve regressed to age 14 and I’m ok with it
That’s (still) Normal
UC: haha I would want to see her too! And I know what you mean I’m seriously going crazy. I’m only listening to the soundtrack and I keep repeating songs
You’ll do that for another 6 months. You’ll never play that Perry Ferrell song you thought you’d learn to like ever again
Moon: Dude the soundtrack is killing me
Dude- Just wait until New Moon’s soundtrack. You’ll wanna kill yourself
UC: So my review of the movie is VERY similar to yours (I didn’t read yours until after I wrote mine) Except.. I added my opinions of seeing it a 2nd time which was PERFECT because I loved it even more
Moon: yea I’m thinking I need to see it again away from little girls
UC: Yes. it was SO different
Moon: I think I’ll be able to focus on it and not wonder what’s next and stop worrying about the cheesy special FX and enjoy
You won’t stop worrying about the cheesy FX because they don’t stop being cheesy
UC: right- I def. wasn’t focused first time around. [My husband] Mr. Choice didn’t think it was cheesy at all (the diamonds)
The what? Diamonds? Do you mean the sparkles? Oh UC….
UC: he said if it was anything more, he thinks it would’ve been cheesy.
He’s wrong. It was cheesy
UC: I could’ve used some more sparkle myself. Spoiler alert for my review. He LOVED it
Moon: Every dude or person who didn’t read the books really liked it
Is every ‘dude or person” you know a family member of Catherine Hardwicke? [side note: this was during the phase when Moon called every guy a dude]
UC: I know!
Moon: so I think it’s just the diehards who are trying to reconcile the whole thing to whatever they imagined
UC: He said it’s a shame it’s the teen demographic because it’s not going to get the credit and attention it deserves for being a really kick-a movie
Hahahaha UC print that out and remind Mr. Choice DAILY that he once said that. He won’t believe you….
Moon: EXACTLY! So many people are like that’s a YA novel. I’m like SO WHAT?!
Preach it
Moon: If they got a different director and some kick ass CGI/FX this could contend with the summer blockbusters- it’s supernatural
Preeeacch it!
UC: and the actors were soo good!
Uh… who do you mean? Jessica and Mike? And sometimes Rob?
Moon: It could be put it in there with Batman and stuff
Uh, what? Continue…

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