PostSecret- your Twilight secrets

Dear Secret Keepers,

One of my favorite books/organizations/sites on the web is PostSecret. For the unfamiliar, people anonymously send in secrets to a PO box and sometimes they get published in a book, are used in their traveling art show or are posted as “Sunday Secrets’ on the PostSecret blog. The secrets are often funny, sometimes heart-breaking and many times really, really honest. They are so honest that PostSecret now works with a suicide hotline to help people who are struggling. The honesty & transparency of these anonymous people is truly beautiful.

This is one of my most recent PostSecret favs (and only the Harry Potter dorks like myself will think it’s funny)

Every Sunday when I read the Sunday Secrets, I am reminded of my own secrets which, of course, these days mostly have to do with Twilight. I know I am not the only one with Twilight secrets. So I asked a group of random LTT/LTR contributors to send me their secrets- funny, heart-warming or sad. And they did. And I loved them for it. After the jump read the anonymous secrets I received and love them with  me: Continue…

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True Love Waits for Ashley Greene

Dear Ash,

When you were spotted by the paps at LAX arriving from Vancouver, I couldn’t help but notice you were wearing a ring on your left ring finger. While the left hand ring finger is usually reserved for a wedding ring, I have known a few instances where the norm is broken. In your case:

• Is this your promise ring to Jackson? I know right now is not a practical time to date each other because Jax is too busy with Monkey girls in Monkey hats at his 100Monkey’s shows, and you’ve been quoted as saying your “boyfriend” is your “career” right now. But perhaps you two have promised to be together someday
  this is a secret message about saving yourself for Rob
  

  Wait for me baby…

• Or is that the True Love Waits ring you picked up at your most recent abstinence conference? Don’t deny that you attended one. I know you try to trick us with your slutty photo shoots for Maxim mag, but we’re on to you.  We caught you in a time of prayer with your accountability partners, Dakota and Kristen, in Italy the other week, and we haven’t even had time to discuss Kellan and your plans for the fall- attending the “Flatline” conference in Texas where the mission is to “bridge the gaps between the generations [of women] by encouraging and taking an everyday interest by investing in everyday lives” Uh, What the hale I mean clearly Kellan has been rubbing off on you with all his Purpose Driven Life reading- or maybe it was you who bought him the book in the first place. Let me guess, you guys have matching “True love Waits” necklaces (I’ve seen the necklace cord Kellan drives to hide under his purple tank tops)

While I’m a little shocked to find out you’re saving your v-card for that someone special, I’m also quite proud of you. You’re a smokin’ hot chick, and I’m glad to know you’re not giving it up to everyone random male ho who asks.

Save it for Jackson,
UnintendedChoice

PS: Thom Yorke wants to sing you a song:

-Moon tricked me. She promised she’d recap her night with Sam Bradley, but instead wrote some other nonsense. I demand a story about Sam Bradley NOW, MOON! 🙂 LTR

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This is how you found us? Vol. 4

f-a-k-e l-e-s-b-i-a-n-s

Dear LTT/LTR’ers and googlers-

My how time flies! It’s already June and we missed one of our favorite reoccuring posts: “This is how you found us?!” in May. For those of us just joining in on the fun, WordPress (our blog program) allows you to see handy dandy stuff like numbers of visitors, which post is the most popular and what terms people searched for when they found our site. When we found this feature we would laugh so hard at some of the terms we knew we had to share them with you awesome readers! And May did NOT dissappoint, seriously these are some of the best we’ve seen. So without further adieu… This Is How You Found Us??!!

Where robert pattinson hangs out – You want to know my address? Or the 24hr taco joint down the street from his hotel?

Twlight edward eyes pillow case – It’s creepy trust me, but also totally awesome to scare your visiting co-blogger with when they wake up!

The Tuck Pattinson – is this Rob’s new nickname? Forget spunk ransom, it’s now officially Robert “The Tuck” Pattinson

Abstinence – Well, you’ve come to the right place… we’re totally saving ourselves for our wedding night with Robert Pattinson… and Jackson Rathbone… and Kellan Lutz… aaaannnddd… ok well maybe abstinence isn’t the term…

Buy Pattinsons wardrobe – this will cost you all of 4.75, to get his look all you need is whatever you wore in 9th grade and then access to either a Goodwill thrift store or movie Wardrobe dept. for a couple extra holey tshirts every 6 months. (This might be in my favorite top 5 things anyone’s every googled and found us! What else can you say about the genius of this?)

Robert Pattinson birthday gift from Kellan – I’m guessing either a personalized copy of The Purpose Driven Life signed by Rick Warren, or an ex-small purple wifebeater

Wig for new moon – NOT THIS ONE! If this is your New Moon Hair Dept, we are NOT happy. FYI

What is robert pattinson doing for his birthday – Well besides us, maybe about 29 shots of Jameson, smoke a whole pack and then hide in his room from you freaks.

www.jet-porno.ru – is this some kinky mile-high club shiz?? (check it at your own risk i have NO idea what that is)

funny lesbian birthday wishes – I’m not sure but maybe we can ask KStew and NReed for some ideas? Unless they’re not talking to each other now since that whole messy faux break up we’ve created in our minds happened.

Buttcrack school – Dude, Buttcrack Santa is teaching? Where do I sign up? Prof. Santa!

Follow the cut for more hilarious, scary and just plain weird googles! Trust me it just keeps getting better!
Continue…

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Abstinence message

Dear Twilight,

That’s all.

Loves,

Me

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