Everything I needed to know about life I learned from Twilight

twilight-book-coverDear Stephenie Meyer,

I’ve been apart of the Twilight fandom and reader of your saga for going on 9months now. Quite a short amount of time when you think about it and especially compared to some folks who have been around since the beginning. But 9months of living, breathing, reading and blogging about anything and everything, Twilight has show me quite a few things about life, stuff I can’t believe I didn’t know before all this and I’m sure you’ll agree…

  • If your boyfriend ever breaks up with you, getting lost in the woods is a good way to meet some of the local boys and perhaps Mr. Rebound will carry you home if you act ‘out of it’ enough
  • When you really need to know if your 17yr old crush exhibits characteristics of  a vampire, it’s totally ok to wait till you can get to a bookstore to buy a book about Native American Legends instead of googling it immediately
  • Fake, sexy vampires. Yes please

    Fake, sexy vampires. Yes please

    It is perfectly acceptable to expect to find a guy who is gorgeous, smart, rich, charming, has a 6 pack, desires you above anyone else, would die for you and doesn’t’ mind when you’re a whiny little bitch

  • If your crush shows you that his skin sparkles like diamonds in the sunlight, stick around! You definitely want to find out if he can uproot trees, hurl logs across fields and breathe you into submission with his ice cold breath
  • If a man named Rob Pattinson happens to show up in your life, dominates your thoughts, your time and your sanity, it’s perfectly normal to want to slap that grin off his face and then want to do naughty things to him in a busy intersection
  • It’s perfectly normal to expect your vampire boyfriend and your werewolf best friend to fight to the death on your behalf even when you can’t choose between them while leading them both on. It’s called chivalry after all
  • To be a true catch all you need is: rock hard abs, family of super hero quality people, immortality, a sister with the ability to see the future, a shiny silver volvo, and a wounded heart
  • jasperaliceIf you’ve ever thought the idea of doing it with a vampire is sexy and dangerous, it is. You will enjoy the sex. The sex will be more mind blowing than you can imagine. But the pain of a half-vampire child ripping it’s way out of your womb because you chose to have unprotected sex with said handsome vampire? Not worth it
  • When you go into labor with your unplanned, supernatural child, having your husband chew through your abdomen to deliver the monster baby is a viable delivery option
  • I can write something funny about ANYTHING vampire-related in 30 minutes at 2 in the morning
  • Meeting people off the internet with names like Mrs. P_ifurnastee,  Jaspergetsmeexcited and DrCullenatyourService and is a really safe idea!
    Wait. You're how old?

    Wait. You're how old?

  • If a man tries to manipulate your emotions, let him. He’s only using his special gift to make you feel better about yourself because your boyfriend is a flawless human specimen, his sister is quite possibly a former supermodel, treacherous rival vampires have made it their lifes mission to kill you and you’re an average human girl who’s clumsy and thinks sweatpants and holey tshirts are acceptable clothing options to take on a trip to Italy
  • Spending every evening online tweeting, posting in a forum and blogging about Vampires is good for your social life

So as you can see the keys to living a good life are found in your saga Stephenie! Did you know that? Between you and me I think you may be on to something. Who knows, this whole Twilight could really blow up some day!

Off to find a sparkly perfect boyfriend! Cause that’s totally possible!
Themoonisdown

Do what did you learn about life from Twilight?

Don’t miss out on Letters to Rob today!
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Twilosophy – Sad enough to quit reading the Twilight Saga?

twilightDear Twilosophy Majors-

I recently had an email conversation with an old friend who has just finished reading Twilight. I was excited (of course! a new convert!) and asked her if she’d finished the entire saga. She told me no, and that she decided to stop at the end of Twilight because it was consuming her thought life, her real life and making her depressed and sad. I was quite taken aback and wasn’t really sure what to say because OF COURSE I had been emotionally affected by the series how could you not be? And isn’t that normal? But that never once made me want to quit, in fact quite the opposite. I HAD to know how it ended. I had to know that even through it all: the drama, the conflict, the separation the October, November, December, January for God’s sake, that Bella and Edward would be together in the end. That they really would make it.

Which got me to thinking… can a book (or any work of art for that matter) be “good” if it doesn’t make you feel something?

Think about your favorite song, your favorite movie, your favorite piece of art… why do you like it? Sure music can be fun to listen to, movies entertaining, and art “pretty” but at the end of the day if it’s emotionally vacant it doesn’t stay with you. The stuff you connect with, the stuff that becomes your favorite speaks to you! I’ve always said what matters most to me about a piece of music are the lyrics. They’re the heart of the song for me because that’s what I remember and what gives me something to relate to. When I’m sad I wanna listen to Joni Mitchell for a reason, when I’m nostalgic for home I listen to Jimmy Eat World for a reason.

It’s the same with the Twilight Saga, it has all those components that we can relate to in our lives: Twilight has that first love jitters, New Moon has the deep dark sadness of losing someone, Eclipse has that feeling of being torn between two things you really care about and finally Breaking Dawn takes us in about every direction. But that’s why we love it! If it was a bland sugar coated fairy tale we wouldn’t all be sitting around here every day shooting the shit. God knows there’s a lot of other stuff to be doing, but because we’ve somehow all been personally touched by the Saga we want to discuss it and find other people like us here who can relate.

Don’t get me wrong I commend my friend for knowing herself enough to stop if something, even a book, was being personally destructive for her… but I also wonder if we don’t have those kinds of reactions to art or life in general what would the world be like? A lot of lukewarm moments, boring taupe walls and Kenny G songs?

Painting this wall red!
Themoonisdown

PS Stay tuned for the next Twilosophy installment when I break down the rest of my email discussion, involving relationships in and out of the Twi-dom

PPS Read other Twilosophy lectures

What do you think? Too emotional, must quit? Or must go on?

Update: LTT & LTR were mentioned (along w/ some of our other fav blogs) in the Greek version of Glamour mag. Weird? Crazy? Awesome! Whatever.. we love it! LTT/LTR mention in Greek Glamour

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