Dear JD,

Remember when– we had no idea who you were last week? And even when you told us who you played we barely remembered? And then we were downright shocked when you said Nahuel was 150 years old. As if the Jacob imprinting on baby Renesmee wasn’t weird enough, this is another level. Cause CLEARLY SMeyer sets the end Of Breaking Dawn up with a new love triangle, Renesmee, Jacob and Nahuel. We’re on to you Stephenie. Also we desperately need to read Breaking Dawn again, this is crazy and we’ve forgotten some key plot points apparently.

ANYWAY.Can we also can tell you about how UC was talking with Calliopeblabs yesterday about you  and how you’re “the male renesmee” and she looked at UC, shocked and said “What? there’s a MALE renesmee?” Yea. So clearly you AND Nahuel have a lot of ground to cover in the whole character awareness department between now and November. But we’re pretty sure the loin clothe will make up for that. Trust me, we know this audience.

Cause this is normal

We have to say you might be one of our new favorite Twilight people (hahaha yes, you’re considered that now) because you stopped being polite and started getting REAL. No we weren’t on the Real World but you talked to us about stuff besides character development and the movie and blahblahblaaahblah. Important stuff like your favorite LA bars, what non-Tom Hanks movies are your favorite, why we should defs take those free archery lessons and how it’s hard out there for a Gucci model. OH WAIT. No.

After the night mercifully ended without those shots UC kept trying to push on us we went home to do some Google stalking research.

Things we found out about you –

The photos on your IMDB really don’t do you justice, whoever chose those should be fired and replaced be us. We would love to add “IMDB Picture Choosers” (technical term) to our business cards (under Vampire bloggers, Ryan Gosling enthusiasts, Froyo specialists and Gin taste testers, natch).

Witness:

The Gucci days?? We hope.

From your audition from the OC??

May we suggest one of these:

I might also suggest sending you for some new headshots. We know a great photographer who would shot you in the forest (aka Griffith Park) wearing cocktail dresses reading Twilight magazine. Not that we would have ANY personal first hand experience with this, but it’s just a hunch. Let us know, we’ll hook it up!