Taylor’s got a new lady and we wanna know if she’s DTF

Dear Taylor,

While I was busy watching the Grammys and suffering through people saying “Who are the Avett Brothers/Mumford and Sons/Arcade Fire?” You were busy making your way through LAX with a chick called Lily Collins, aka your costar in the upcoming flick Abduction. Is that why Taylor wasn’t at the Grammy’s? Did she refuse to put on a pretty pretty princess dress and instead locked herself in her hotel room and tried to think of all the words that rhymed with Lily? We all know Taylor Swift already wrote a number one song about YOU do you really want to give her fodder for a follow up record where she trashes you for having an on set hook up with a costar when that’s how YOU two met? Moving on is sad Taylors…

Hmmm this dress looks familiar… (ps if that was a DC we’d be in business)

Since I care for you Taylor I decided to investigate who this Lily Collins girl is. I was hoping she was the heir of the Olive Garden/Red Lobster restaurant chain, or at least the daughter of a McDonald’s franchise owner in the midwest somewhere but as it turns out is just the daughter of some musician named Phil Collins* who was born in Guildford, England aka where Daniel Gale in The Bad Mother’s Handbook is from (someone put me out of my misery for knowing that. my life is embarrassing right now). Also important to note is the fact she’s 21!!! Dude, you like the older ladies… that’s the same as Swifty (someone go give her a hug). She has written in a bunch of magazines, hosted a kids pick the president event, has been cast in the Mortal Instruments adaption and has large eyebrows. We’re taking Camilla Belle/Sandy Cohen level eye brows. So pretty much your basic cute girl next door. ZZZZZZZzzzzzz. Someone wake me up when she writes a song about family taco night at the Lautners or how Taylor gave her a “Women of the Word” devotional book.

The only info you we need to know about this Lily Collins girl is whether she is DTF like Taylor Swift was for you… and if not you better start sending those roses to Taylor Swift again and showing her your “tan skin” cause being non-DTF will just not do for us. Thanks.

I may or may not be DTF,
Themoonisdown

PS why does your face look like a weird fan manipulation image in that LAX photo?

*I know who Phil Collins is, thanks*

DUDES two Taylor posts, back to back! Where are our Team Jacob girls at? Do we think Lily is DTF or does Taylor really just likes that song from Tarzan?

Our internet game is ridiculous: LTR, The Forum, Twitter, The Store

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Moon & UC’s Excellent Adventure Vol. 2: The Stephenie Meyer Interview

Dear LTTers,

UC POV

4:00 am, somewhere in Pennsylvania, an alarm clock is set to go off.
Silence
4:15 am, somewhere in PA, a back-up alarm clock is set to go off
Silence
4:30 am, somewhere, a “you’re an idiot if you’re not up by now, but I’ll set this just in case’ alarm clock is set to go off
Silence

Never drive faster that your guardian Larry can fly

6:30 am, Mr. Choice awakes to find me still in our bed, panic tears & wailing ensue. I rush, with teeth brushed (not hair) & no make-u applied, to the airport 1 hour away to try to catch a flight that leaves in ½ hour. After being told there are no more LA flights with room, oh wait, we found 1 seat in first class for $1500, oh no- sorry that flight won’t get you in until 7 pm, oh wait, just kidding we found one seat on the next flight to LA, I arrive in LA only 2 hours later than I was supposed to. Crisis Averted! I attribute it to one thing and one thing only- Larry411. The Twitter “celebrity” was on my flight and I feel as thought the universe knew that having me & Larry, two of the most important Twilight people EVER, on the plane was a necessity. (Yeah, it’s going to be awkward next time I run into him in Philly after I tweet him today showing him this picture I took while sitting 2 seats down from him, trying to work up the nerve to say “Hi, I’m UC, I like Twilight” but deciding against it b/c snot was pouring out of my nose due to previous crying spell.)

Moon POV

Being woken up at 5am by about 20 text messages is never a good thing. Unless the person sending them is Robert Pattinson looking for a booty call. This was not the case Thursday morning.

Since UC’s 2390429034 alarms failed and she missed her flight, I spent those extra hours running around doing errands, finding a blasted voice recorder so we could immortalize the interview forever and ever and make Stephenie Meyer saying “2nd hand embarrassed” (oh yes, she did!) our outgoing voice mail message.

After fetching UC from LAX we busted a groove over to Westwood so we could meet up with Twifans and Twilight Series Theories for lunch, which was deeeeeeeeeeeeelicious. And of course we debated what we thought would happen during the interview which was pretty much us saying we weren’t about to stay on topic (ie Bree and Eclipse).

*thinking* holy crap holy crap holy crap what are we gonna ask?!

So the countdown to SM time had begun and we hadn’t pow wow-ed about our potential questions for the NEXT day. So of course we ran down to the pool to get our sun on, which was conveniently behind a building thus making us shiver, and run through questions and potential scenarios. While we pondered what our first question would be: Jorts vs Tweed or Big Daddy vs Dick Pattz, some of the other sites came up to talk about how they thought it would go down and some of their potential questions. And well, you know us, we’re not exactly rules followers or the kind of people who want to know, in detail, what happened in Edward’s mind on page 78 so we got a bit spooked. Ok, we freaked!

It's everywhere!! We can't escape!

UC: You guys really put on the pressure! We knew that if we went in there asking when Fred’s birthday was (May 17, 1984, btw) you’d kill us. And rightfully so. We started having these joint, day-time nightmares of us asking a funny question and Stephenie saying, “I refuse to answer unless you somehow turn that really hilarious joke into a question about the intricacies of Bree’s life.” (If you think for one second I actually know what Fred’s birthday is, you’re fired as an LTT reader)

Moon: So we called an emergency dinner of the Los Angeles branch of the LTT family. We needed to be talked down by The Font and White Yorkie. Over sushi of course. Well, we ate sushi and the Font watched the Lakers and White Yorkie bailed on our asses.

UC POV

Since this was my first time meeting the guys, I’ll jump in to report that #1 they are huggers, #2 The Font wore some sort of 7 year old boys’ comic book or teenage-mutant ninja turtle t-shirt and #3 White Yorkie has action figure boxes on his bedroom walls. I assumed they were from Action-Figure Edward, but I didn’t ask.

The guys TOTALLY got us pumped up. They made us laugh, they reminded us that we’re not expected to be like any other site but ourselves & threatened to never do another LTT podcast or even SPEAK to us again if we weren’t absolutely cool. Oh, and they told us we better make Stephenie laugh.

Picture of us suitable for hanging next to your family members (that's what the note said!)

Later that night, after ordering a bottle of water from room service & being served Evian like it was Don Perignon, we wrapped our gifts for Stephenie, Moon finished up 2 mixed CDs she made her (Yes- she rules), and I said “I’m so tired I think I’m going to die” about 3,000 times.

OH NO IT'S TOMORROW!!!!!!!!!!

Moon: And when we got in bed we got Twilosophical & talked about how we just wanted to be true to ourselves and to the blog. If the interview was going to be lame and controlled, we were still going to TRY to ask the questions we wanted and all the LTTers wanted to have answered!

THE BIG DAY (after the jump!) Continue…

302 Commented

This is how you found us Vol. 5

f-a-k-e l-e-s-b-i-a-n-s

Dear LTT-ers and LTR-ers,

It’s been a while since we’ve had a “This is how you found us” post. Though I think after this last week, we just may know how a bunch of you found us, and WELCOME! But mostly people’s searches are getting to be a lot more boring, just the same ol Rob, Kristen, Jackson, Taylor and Kristen’s pregnant like a millions times. Come on, show us your creativity! But we’ve managed to pull together another stellar round of crazy searches for June and July!

For the uninitiated, WordPress (our blog program) allows you to see handy dandy stuff like numbers of visitors, which post is the most popular and what terms people searched for when they found our site. When we found this feature we would laugh so hard at some of the terms we knew we had to share them with you awesome readers! And thus this reoccurring blog post was born!

So here we go again…

• 

  Kristen i’m pregnant – Seriously, Kristen we don’t believe it. Stop trying to spread this rumor!

• Oil painting in film ‘twilight’ – Dear god please tell me you’re not trying to create a Twilight oil painting… we have enough stuff in the Twilight Museum of crap Art!

• Insane Twilight tattoos – oh you mean the back piece I got inked of the Forks, WA topographical map?

• Taylor Lautner in his underwear – Stop trying to fool us Chris Hanson, we’re on to you and we’ve already surrendered!

• Win a day with Rob Pattinson – This whirlwind day of romance includes lunch at a vending machine, a 1 minute conversation about cheetos, 4 hours reading in silence at a Borders and culminates with him waving as you get into a cab at 6:20PM. ENTER HERE!!Follow the cut for more good times and crazy googles! Continue…

61 Commented

Where are you Nikki Reed?

Have you seen this girl?

Dear Nikki,

Monday when I was writing that post about Drunk emailing and how much would it cost to get a Twi star at your party, I was reviewing the list and kept wondering who I left out and then it dawned on me: I left out YOU! And so that’s why I wrote “Nikki – WHO?” Cause seriously girl where the h-word are you?! I’m kind of actually doing a Mom Moon and worrying about you and where you’ve been and how you’re doing. If I wanted to pull a real Mom Moon I’d start calling the LAPD, and area LA Hospitals to see if you’ve turned up. Cause it’s July 14th at 5am in Los Angeles, “Do you know where your Nikki Reed is?” Cause I sure as crap don’t.

So of course it got me thinking… where in the world could you be? And what are you doing? I checked IMDB and the only thing you have current is in pre-pro and that’s K-11 and we KNOW that ain’t filming right now and it might even be up in the air if you’re even still in it, especially if that whole KStew falling out rumor is true.

So then I checked to see if you have any fansites cause if anyone knows what’s up with Twi stars it’s their fans! Can I get an amen? And I find out no one’s updated in about a week. That isn’t good news. Then I hit Twitter, cause that’s all the latest and greatest and guess what all (read 2) fan twitters hadn’t updated in days either. Not even your FAKE twitter counterpart has cared enough to tweet about your fake goings on in over a week!

So it’s left me only a couple options as to where you’ve been…

• You were driving to LAX one day, took and wrong turn and got lost in south central LA and were jumped into one of the local gangs… crips or bloods? I’d say crips cause you look better in blue than red. If this is true call us maybe we can initiate a trade off with the crips. You for Justin Chon or maybe they want someone beefier like Christian Serratos?

• You’ve become a hermit spending all your time online at Nike.com designing more ridiculous neon high top sneakers than you know what to do with. My advice? Trash them all and get a nice pair of ballet flats.

• This whole Oregano thing is true and you’ve chosen him over KStew. WOW if that’s true I really want the dish! Give me the gossip now! And so you two are hanging out at Cathy’s house, smoking up and worming your way into whatever movie she’s doing next. I wish I knew Cathy, I’d love to be an actress.

Take the cut to find out what Nikki’s REALLY been up to. TRUST it’s SOOO good!
Continue…

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Ashley Greene our new BFF

Dear Ashley,

Friday night was a night of amazing luck.  Not only did my flight get in 52 minutes early, but Moon BOOKED IT over to Hollywood after work (without eating any dinner- that’s commitment) got us tickets for your appearance at Hot Topic, picked me & the hubster up at LAX, and drove us BACK to Hollywood where we showed up at 10:04 and live twitted our entire evening’s experience. And though the night ended around 2am, I still had enough energy to drag my bag up Moon’s bajillion stairs into her house, even though it was 5am my time. Luck, I tell you…

Because we had tickets, we decided NOT to wait in the long-ass line of ticket holders since it was freezing and FAR away from the action. Instead we got up close and personal with all your fans and the camera crews waiting outside of the Hot Topic Store.  There we met some pretty great new Twi-friends (and made fun of and took pictures of some way weirdo Twi-fans) and got to be with Mini-Edward for his first MTV experience.  It was so fun being with all the hyped-up fans (minus the one girl who seriously needs to be kicked for her insane screaming fits) that we didn’t even mind waiting for you for two hours. Plus when you finally showed you were in this adorable red dress flashing your famous, gorgeous “Ashley Greene” smile that we didn’t even mind the crowd rushing us from behind and pushing us into the security gate. (Okay…we minded a little…)

After you went into Hot Topic we decided to be super smart and, again, forego the long-ass line and get us a midnight snack. Johnny Rockets rocks the fries at 12:15am.  By the time we were done, we jumped back at the end of the line, made it into Hot Topic within a 1/2 hour, snapped some adorable shots of you behind the counter, picked up our signed copies of the DVD & swooned over your adorable Twilight earrings (and after viewing some of the professional vids of you that night- we realize you didn’t show up with those earrings and must’ve put them on mid-evening… we’re guessing you were wearing a fan gift, which makes you even more bff-worthy in our minds).

Plus, we ended the night meeting the BEST Unicorn ever in line- Kynt from season 12 of The Amazing Race. He’s the biggest Twilight fan and we wanna invite him to our next sleepover with you and Rachelle, if that’s okay with you.

Really, not much could’ve made our night better (well, maybe 5-8 degrees, a soft comfy chair, 1 less screaming, crazy girl, & you coming 2 hours earlier serving us Rob on a platter). It was amazing and so wonderful to know without a doubt that you are the graceful, beautiful person you appear to be on screen, up close & personal!

Bffs already,
UnintendedChoice

Seriously, amazing night. I was high on adreneline and that’s the only reason I wasn’t falling asleep standing up. Thanks to Ashley Greene for being your adorable, awesome self. Thanks to Moon for not eating dinner and running all over town to ensure we had an amazing night- plus putting the Edward Cullen PillowCase on the bed to welcome me to your home. Thanks to JBell who is our best cheerleader on Twitter! Thanks to the hubster for sitting by himself for hours in downtown Hollywood and enduring the people pretending to be Jesus & Spiderman in the street. And thanks to Kynt, our new friend, who blogs here, and who was so fun to meet at 1-something in the am. Oh, and thanks to Rob Pattinson because you’re hot and… why the hell not?

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