Kellan’s gonna Punk us all!

You're about to get Punk'd

Dear Anyone who’s ever known Kellan,

Cast members
Bible Study friends
Accountability Partners
Anna Lynne
The Wig Anna Lynne wore

This will serve as your warning, Kellan is going to be hosting an episode of Punk’d this season when they launch the reboot. Along with other celebs he will host an episode where he pulls a prank that supposed to be funny on SOMEONE… who that person(s) will be, we don’t know. So OF COURSE, I’ve come up with some scenarios…

Kellan bursts in on his weekly bible study in Hollywood as they’re studying a particularly tricky passage… “HAHA! You guys just got Punk’d! While everyone was giving one armed side hugs and trying out the casserole potluck I switched all the bible’s from NIV translation to King James! You’ve been studying from the least accurate translation of the bible!!! HAHAHAHA SUCKAHS!!!!” Kellan steals some leftovers and exits as everyone continues to look confused.

You just got... no wait, maybe I got Punk'd in this one

Kellan bursts in on his mom’s yearly mammogram appointment at the gynocologist’s office. “You just got Punk’d Mom!!!! HAHAHA!!! Remember when I asked to see your phone because I wanted to install my new Kellan Lutz app? Well guess what, there is no Kellan Luta app and instead I changed your appointment to today! You didn’t have to get your boob smashed for another six months! HAHAAHAHA! SUCKS TO BE YOU MOM!” Turns to camera “Ladies, don’t forget your yearly mammograms and monthly self exams” Demonstrates on himself and then exits while his mom stands shirtless next to the radiologist behind him.

Kellan jumps on stage after the 100 Monkeys finish an improvised song “We’re all gay for each other.” “HAHAHAHAHA YOU JUST GOT PUNK’D Jackson and Monkey dudes who’s names I don’t know! I was the dude who yelled “We’re all gay for each other” when you asked for audience suggestions for your improvised song. GOTCHA ALL!!! You just unknowingly came out on national television! HHAAHHAAH!” Kellan runs off stage laughing at Jackson and his guyliner. Too bad the joke’s on Kellan because the 100 Monkeys will go on to sell 38 copies of the song on iTunes. It was a reverse punking! On us all…

Kellan shows up to the Breaking Dawn Pt 1 tent city with dozens upon dozens of doughnuts for tired, hungry crazed Twifans sleeping in tents with his face on the side. As the fans attempt to grab his butt a doughnut Kellan throws the doughnuts on the ground and yells “YOU JUST GOT PUNK’D Twilight fans!!! HAHAHAHA I care too much about your health to let you eat these sugary, diabetes inducing, high fructose corn syrup bombs. Now go back to your tents!! HAHAHAA!” Kellan runs off to his limo but not without first picking up a half smashed doughnut from the ground then shoving it into his mouth before jumping into the backseat as Twihards stand, mouths agap, staring.

Little did you know Ashley... you just got Punk'd!

Kellan bursts into Ashley Green’s room as she’s changing, half naked she asks his opinion on an outfit. “Whatever shows the most T&A cause guess what you just got Punk’d Ashley! I’m actually not gay, I’m straight so all this time you’ve been thinking our cuddle sessions were totally platonic, they weren’t… and all the times I suggest we play Truth or Dare on game night and dared you to kiss me it’s because I totally like women not men! HAHAHAHAA! Now I’m off to the FEMALE strip club!” Cut back to Ashley half naked as she turns to the camera and mouths “I knew all along” HIT IT!

Yea, I pretty much imagine it to be something along these lines… only time will tell. So be vigilant and be on your toes friends and foes of Kellan! He’s on the Punk’d prowl.

If you see something, say something!

What will lil Kell bell do for his Punk’d episode? Anyone we missed?

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63 Commented

News Dump: The one with a lotta Sundance and a lotta Renesmee

Double feature now showing!

Dear LTT-ers,

It’s time to catch up on the news that only needs a sentences worth of discussion. Yes, it’s time for another News Dump! So put on your Bella jacket and mittens cause there’s a whole lotta Sundance!

  • In between holding still for the screenings, Elizabeth talked about Kristen and Mackenzie. Don’t bother watching, it’s everything you expect: “Kristen scared me!” and “She looks like their child!” Boom, saved you 4 minutes!
  • Apparently it must be a Holy Trinity week of filming cause Charlie Bewley is ALSO at Sundance and he dropped this awesome gem when asked about Renesmee:

“I imagine if Robert Pattinson and Kristen Stewart had a kid it’d be like this grungy…awkward and shy kind of thing,” jokes Charlie Bewley, who plays Demetri in the vampire movie franchise.

Dare to NAIR ladies

  • I’m sure it’s a BIG DEAL that artist Richard Phillips included Rob, Kristen and Dakota on his “Most Wanted” list and created pop images of them but I’m not so sure the girls appreciate the weird shadows on their upper lips that look oddly like mustaches.
  • WHO wasn’t at Sundance? Chaske Spencer ALSO dropped by the gifting suites to debut his new hair and announce he joined Fall Out Boy and will be quitting BD and touring this spring with the band. Then he bequeathed the role of Sam back to Solomon Trimble who clocked out at Home Depot and jumped on Cathi Hardi’s private jet for Sundance. Free shiz it free shiz however you get it.
  • Bella’s house was pulled out of storage (a Vancouver Twimom’s garage) and reconstructed over the last few days. It looks more like a Sears Siding commercial or the AFTER tornado view of Dorothy’s house in Kansas than the home of the Swans.

Things that are important to note from this video:
1. Jackson’s Jasper hair is back. The REAL Jasper hair. Like Twilight Jasper hair. We may need to get a muffin basket together for the BD hair folks
2. The 100 Monkey have a REAL, ACTUAL Tour bus???
3. In 5 years Jackson may be on Dancing with the Stars… or Dancing with the hands-y fans.
4. Who does Jackson give HJ’s to regularly at MTV that the 100 Monkeys keep showing up on this MTV videos?
5. Jackson seems to have dropped the totally over the top accent plus side mouth talking thing a bit. He must read LTT. *Hi Jacky!*
6. That one dude totally wishes he was Jackson. Sorry dude jumping around in the back who’s name I don’t know. Enjoy it while it lasts!
7. Does Jackson have one suitcase fully devoted to his WEIRD hat collection?

  • If you weren’t scared about bringing Breaking Dawn to the big screen you will be after you see this fan art I dug up over at Twifans. WOAH. Someone hold me.
  • BREAKING NEWS: Still no new set pictures or actual evidence that they’re doing anything in Baton Rouge. SHOCKING.

Off to the gifting suites… I mean Sundance!

Srsly how are 100 Monkeys still being featured on MTVonline on the regular? I don’t get it.I was mean about Liz’s fivehead but for reals, side sweep, am I right? What say you?

Our internet game is ridiculous: LTR, The Forum, Twitter, The Store

214 Commented

Live Blogging the premiere with TheFabLife

Dear Twilight Eclipse Rob, whatever who cares,

We’re excited that throughout the day & evening we’ll be LIVE BLOGGING the exciting, crazy premiere events today with our friends at VH1’s TheFabLife (who are going to be ON the red carpet, FYI)

I (UC) met Kate from The Fab Life through my PERSONAL blog, fell in love with her over lunch one day in NYC and found we are basically the same person except she loves her some Robsten- which is normally a deal-breaker for me in relationships, but I’m letting this one slide 🙂 JK- she’s amazing, totally normal & super funny. AND SHE GETS TO INTERVIEW ROB TONIGHT. Lucky biatch.

Anyway, enjoy & participate in the craziness today & tonight as it all goes down! And once Moon is up and at ’em she will be giving us the goods FROM the premiere! Knowing her luck lately she’s TOTALLY gonna end up at the After-party DANCING with Big Daddy Lautner. You know it!

PLUS- we’re lucky to have two special guests tweeting along with us tonight: LilCrazyCow (Moon’s cousin who is with her in LA) And THE FONT from the LTT Podcast! You’ll know them by their tweets: The Font’s ends with ^tf and LilCrazyCow will be ^lcc.

Not in LA (like me- boo hoo) and want to watch a live stream? Open this LTT post in another window & watch and join the live blog convo! Once we’re live I might move posts around a bit, so just stay tuned.

So much Eclipse craziness! We actually DID post a regular LTT letter today too! Read it here!!!


UC & Moon

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5 Commented

Eclipse Premiere live streams

Dear people unlucky like me, not in LA,

We’ll be posting whatever Eclipse premiere live-streams we can here! Make sure you watch it here, then open up our Live Blog with VH1’s “TheFabLife” in another screen! Sounds like they all start at 8:30 pm ET in the US & 5:30 PT!!


UC & Moon


Twilight Official MySpace Profile


Summit Sites

Summit has some live streams at the following sites in case they go down here:

We posted like a million times today, wordpress doesn’t know what to do! Get back to today’s letter if you missed it!!!

Our internet game is ridiculous: LTR, The Forum, Twitter, The Store

4 Commented

Twilosophy: I am NOT the number 1 Twilight fan!

Dear Twilight and fellow LTT-ers,

Recently a girl I sorta know found out about the blogs and asked me “so you’re like the number one Twilight fan, huh?!” and I wholeheartedly and vehemently said NO! No I am NOT the number one Twilight fan cause in my mind number one fan is some crazy lunatic with Twilight tattoos, owns the entire line of tshirts from Hot Topic, sleeps on the sidewalk for days on end…  number one fan brings to mind visions of that show, FANatic on MTV and how some crazy person deemed an artist’s number one fan went apeshit when they met SugarRay or Britney Spears and that’s about the farthest thing from what I’d do if I ever REALLY met any of these people in real life. In reality I’d pretty much look the other way while hoping they didn’t think I was staring at them. Far from having a fangirl freak out or even acknowledging that I know who they are and NEVER ever in a million years mentioning that I write a blog about them or the books every day.

Yup, number one fan, that's me!

But just because I’m not those things that make me think #1 fan does that make me any less of one? Maybe I really am a number 1 fan. I run this blog, I’ve been to more than my fair share of Twilight related events, heck I have business cards in my handbag with this blog’s URL on it… somehow in my mind this does not equate number one fan but to the outside world, aka the rest of the population, who only know Twilight as that thing “the kids are into” I probably look like the biggest fan that ever lived.

I shudder to think!

So what does it all mean? Follow the cut to see what I come up with…

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