Well, we’re back with some REAL QUICK thoughts over on That’s Normal about the BIG 2014 TWILIGHT NEWS. Oh you don’t know what we’re talking about? Nikki Reed and Paul McDonald are getting divorced you guys.
CUE STRING VERSION OF THEIR BREAKING DAWN PART TWO DUET.
no really, We cue it, embed it & so much more over on That’s Normal today. So you need to read.
We miss you guys like, WHOA. It was fun to be “UC and Moon” again for a hot minute.
REMINDER: There are 4 auto-play video ads that play sometimes throughout the day. Find them & Mute them (hit the volume button) They will stay muted. Two on the side (or directly below this post) and two all the way at the bottom!
While Moon was busy holding the golden mic & being felt up by a D-lister Red Carpet guest (yes that happened. No, she won’t let me tell you who in fear that one day he’ll be an A-lister and somehow desirable), I was in the “other” corner of the carpet, holding down the LTT fort & getting the Behind the Scenes scoop. This basically means I got to wonder FIRST why the likes of Heather Locklear & Seth Green were there. (Still wondering)
I'm told she's a Kardashian relative
By the time the red carpet attendees got down by me, they had gone through two rows of fans, all the photographers & then the International press. The spot was where they relaxed before going into “major” press interviews. And by “major” I, of course, mean that one 16 year old Kardashian half-sister who was filling in for Ryan Seacrest. The spot is also where the handlers & dates of the celebs congregated while the interviews were being conducted. It was also like a C-list celeb meat market. Everyone was hugging everyone & I can only assume they all knew each other because once they were bad guys or murder victims on the same CSI episode. If I knew who half the people were it would have been fascinating.
Getting my picture with the most important celeb on the carpet
When the crowd thinned a bit, I decided to have a snack. Since I snack like a 3 year old, I pulled a sandwich bag filled with Goldfish crackers out of my Chanel bag. And proceeded to do what I do every time I eat Goldfish crackers. Drop them. If you’re wondering if an orange baked cracker blends in on a dark black carpet, the answer is no.
Finding out that a certain cast member of a certain movie couldn’t pay his rent last month
Seeing Nikki Reed run away from International Press to give her husband, Paul, a big hug, before running back for more interviews. It was adorable. So adorable I thought it deserved a piano ballad:
When Jackson came over, the person to my left got a picture with him and so did the person to my right. When he looked at me wondering if I was going to ask for a picture too, I just smiled and contemplated giving him a high-five or asking to stroke his velvet suit.
Seeing first-hand how little moments that happen can change into these big, fabricated or exaggerated stories. There is this rumor floating around that Kristen and her publicist got in a fight on the carpet & she RIPPED the sharpie out of her publicists hand and ran over to her adoring fans. I caught that moment on film & if talking means fighting & taking a marker your publicist is handing you is RIPPING it from her hands, then yes, that’s exactly what happened:
No Big Daddy in sight
Rob didn’t fall in love with me when he was mere inches from my face. I think he saw the goldfish crackers stuck in my teeth
Taylor gave the International press a thumbs up instead of me
Kristen didn’t throw anything in my face. Neither did a crazed Krisbian on an initiation mission. I was even wearing my “Kristen-hater” Sign* Sigh.. there’s always next year
It was sooo cold. Not just California-cold, but winter jacket cold. And my short lace dress (and no tights) was NOT keeping the warmth in.
I left that night still holding the grenade I was gonna throw at Bruno Mars. I never saw him come down the carpet.
It was incredible night- one I could go on about for hours & hours, but I’ll just leave you with this montage of the random, the weird, the great & the pretty: The REAL Red Carpet:
Yep- just noticed a misspelling in the above video. Too late to care. Oh well! It’ll be a contest. First person to spot the mistake gets a fake prize —-> a photoshoot in Carlisle’s Breaking Dawn wig. Lucky you.
*This is false. I left my sign at home**
**Also false. It’s at my office ***
***Do you get it now? We don’t have a Kristen-hater sign****
****It’s a Build board we took out on the 101. Too bad Nokia line is off the 110*****
*****I could go all day….******
******In case you’re new: All of that is false.