Dear Twilight Marketers/advertisers/designers-
Some new movie posters and corresponding photos from the same shoot have recently come out and while I’m excited about the New Moon I couldn’t help but think these pictures don’t really make me think Edward and Bella, vampire and high school girl. They make me think quite different things… just so you know here’s my exact thoughts on the new posters and pics…
Edward Cullen, certified Realtor. Specializes in family homes and hard-to-sell properties. He’s got an amazing split level Ranch with a pool in Sheboygan priced to move! Who wouldn’t buy a home from this guy?
Bella Swan, high school guidance counselor. Her door’s always open for misfits and newly arrived out-of-towners. Ms. Swan won the Washington Teacher’s Golden Apple award for most empathetic and mostly likely to cry right along with her students.
Bella Swan, newest Suicide Girl (nsfw)… her Suicide name is Swan Lake, clearly.
Into: slutty tank tops, Heathcliff, vampires, guys on motorcycles
Occupation: resident piercer at Forks Tattoos and Piercings
So as you can see, people in charge of creating this stuff, I’m not exactly sure the true essence of B ella and Edward is coming across because Edward looks like a middle aged dude into “sports jackets” and Bella is a sad, maybe-slut.
Can’t wait to see the Jacob posters and pictures! What will be be? Altar boy? Bagger at Whole Food? Bring it on!
Which one’s your favorite?
Tags: , attorney, bella swan, edward cullen, film, forever 21, guidance counselor, high school, Jacob Black, Kristen Stewart, lawyer, Movie, movie poster, New Moon, news anchor, photo shoot, piercing, poster, realtor, Rob, Robert Pattinson, Sheboygan, Suicide Girl, Swan Lake, tattoo, Taylor Lautner, Twilight