Dear Stephanie Meyer,
We love you. Have we mentioned that? (Or is it obvious b/c we dedicate TONS of time from our EXTREMELY busy lives to blogging about Twilight?) We love your books. We love your storytelling. We don’t care that you overuse the word “irrevocably.” We don’t care that there wasn’t a major battle at the end of Breaking Dawn. We’re successful, independent, driven woman who know your book(s) aren’t meant to be anti-feminist. You had a dream about the most perfect man in the universe, and you wrote a bestselling series about it. We Get That.
What we don’t get is what happens when Bella gets her period? Does Edward just go away for 3-7 days? If so, where does he go? Or isn’t that blood appealing to him because it comes out of Bella’s “hoo-hoo” and that’s so sicknast? (holla Lauren’s Bite for that word) Or is it that much MORE appealing to him because it comes out of Bella’s “hoo hoo” and he wants to “tap that?” (Um, I need to re-read YOUR books because I just said “hoo-hoo” and “tap-that” in the same sentence which unfortunately resembles Fan-Fic rather than your beautiful, literary work(s).)
Are you wondering where this random question came from? Well, it might be because Moon found this wonderful advertisement for o.b. tampons featuring a vampire with tampons as his teeth.
Uh, we might want to check with the expert, Lauren, over at Lauren’s Bite, but I think we can also categorize this advertisement as sicknast.
So, we’d just like a little clarity on this issue because it really bothers us that the bloodthirsty perfect vampire, Edward, doesn’t seem to be bothered by Bella’s friendly neighborhood visitor who likes to come every 28 days or so.
Maybe Edward has a problem with Bella’s monthly visitor, but Rob Pattinson doesn’t seem to:
Reminder that you have until 7pm ET TONIGHT to enter our Twilight-Party-Pack Giveaway!
Update 3/18: Someone from o.b. tampons left us a comment saying: ‘I’d like to clarify that this image is not one of our advertisements; it was drafted by our ad agency in Switzerland and was rejected, as it does not reflect our values and standards.” Just an FYI! A vampire will not come after your hoo-hoo if you use their tampons!
Tags: , advertisements, Bella, Breaking Dawn, Edward, fan-fic, feminism, hoo-hoo, marketing campaigns, monthly visitor, o.b. tampons, period, rob porn, stephanie meyer, Twilight, vampires