This is how you found us: Vol. 7

This is how you found us Letters to twilight LTT


Dear Twilight,

Mr. Choice asked me this weekend when I’m going to “Quit Blogging about Twilight” (He’s been asking me since December 9th, 2008- the day after we started) and tried to tell me “No one cares about it anymore.” Because he’s a logical SOB I have to “prove” things to him- words mean nothing. So I hopped on our stats to say – SEE- People DO still care!! And while I was looking at the stats I thought to myself, “Huh… people really do still care!” Even though comments have waned over recent months, about the same amount of people visit LTT every day. It’s crazy. Maybe we don’t have time to comment, but people still need their Twi fix!

But while I was looking at the stats I remembered it’s been SO LONG since we’ve visited This is how you found us (over a year!) so without further ado, in the last 30 days, THIS is what you googled to find LTT:

  • Twilight sex fan art I googled this myself to see what delight you came across on LTT when your pervy self searched for this.. what I found was a You Tube Video (that we never posted!) entitled: “Twilight sex pictures cartoon lesbian sex videos sexy army guys free bbw sex movies boob girl” Which was…. all of the above minus anything to do with Twilight! (yep. Watched it. Sue me. It was for “work”) I also found this image which we have never posted but it seems like something we should post. A day doesn’t go by when I don’t hope to see a picture of Rob & Kirsten photoshopped into some sexual pose.
  • Vagina 27 People found us by searching for “vagina.” Our parents should be so proud, Moon.
  • Hairy Penis Scratch that. The 22 people who found us by googling this should make them prouder (REALLY?? REALLY PEOPLE??? You Searched for THAT and came HERE?)
  • liberator sex chair Imagine HOW disappointed some horny dude or housewife was (I say housewife very lovingly as one of my very favorite housewives owns her very own liberator. Ahem) when they came across this post on OUR site (<— read it. it’s a good one!) instead of a place to buy the liberator sex chair. OR… imagine the disappointment of the horny housewife when she opens the box after finally finding the right site & realizing it doesn’t actually come imprinted (!) with the Cullen Crest
  • hairy man 150 people searched for “hairy man” in the past 30 days and found US. In attempts to find out WHAT on LTT could have possibly been of interest to 150 people, I added “Letterstotwilight” into my search. Here is a collage of some of the amazing pictures that appear when you search for “hairy man letterstotwilight”

    Clicky to enjoy in full!

    (Yes, I, UC- non-hairy man although I did decide yesterday I think my arms are hairier than the average female- stars in TWO of those pictures!)

  • letterstoronb Even 30 Googlers last month made a mistake we’ve all done on MANY occasions. They found us by Googling: letters to ronb! Is it Rob? Is it Ron? Who cares! You can find us by just mushing the two words together!
  • natteringyeahrobber Yes. Sometimes we Drunk-google too like the 50 of you who looked for this last month
  • kellan lutz gay rumors You have come to the right place! We LOVE discussing those!
  • is david slade gay Another good question (Answer: Yes)
  • sometimes i pretend to be normal SAD!!! 8 people found us this way last month! While I like to think they had a laugh when they came across LTT & discovering all of us normal people, I also think they were probably looking for some actually real-life help.
  • Taylor Lautner Fanfiction HA! The fact that that brought someone to LTT blows my mind. Just because… I haven’t confessed to you all yet that I’m addicted to Taylor Lautner Real-life fan fic! There’s this one I found where you can tell them your name & they’ll send you the fix with YOUR NAME as the female heroine! And since he’s over 18 and all, Chris Hansen can’t even come NEAR me…It’s awesssomeeeee. (that was all a lie. Yuck. I think I know you all enough to know that real-life Taylor Lautner FAN FIC is not discussed here! I HOPE!)

Moral of the story: Not only are people still coming to & finding LTT but they are still googling inappropriate things that have NOTHING to do with Twilight or LTT & yet finding us anyway. Of course. As always. That’s Normal! So THERE, Mr. Choice! I told you!

Going to google new pictures of Ronb,

Our internet game is ridiculous: LTR, The Forum, Twitter, The Store

104 Commented

This is how you found us? Vol. 4

f-a-k-e l-e-s-b-i-a-n-s

f-a-k-e l-e-s-b-i-a-n-s

Dear LTT/LTR’ers and googlers-

My how time flies! It’s already June and we missed one of our favorite reoccuring posts: “This is how you found us?!” in May. For those of us just joining in on the fun, WordPress (our blog program) allows you to see handy dandy stuff like numbers of visitors, which post is the most popular and what terms people searched for when they found our site. When we found this feature we would laugh so hard at some of the terms we knew we had to share them with you awesome readers! And May did NOT dissappoint, seriously these are some of the best we’ve seen. So without further adieu… This Is How You Found Us??!!

Where robert pattinson hangs out – You want to know my address? Or the 24hr taco joint down the street from his hotel?

Twlight edward eyes pillow caseIt’s creepy trust me, but also totally awesome to scare your visiting co-blogger with when they wake up!

The Tuck Pattinson – is this Rob’s new nickname? Forget spunk ransom, it’s now officially Robert “The Tuck” Pattinson

Abstinence – Well, you’ve come to the right place… we’re totally saving ourselves for our wedding night with Robert Pattinson… and Jackson Rathbone… and Kellan Lutz… aaaannnddd… ok well maybe abstinence isn’t the term…

Buy Pattinsons wardrobe – this will cost you all of 4.75, to get his look all you need is whatever you wore in 9th grade and then access to either a Goodwill thrift store or movie Wardrobe dept. for a couple extra holey tshirts every 6 months. (This might be in my favorite top 5 things anyone’s every googled and found us! What else can you say about the genius of this?)

Robert Pattinson birthday gift from Kellan – I’m guessing either a personalized copy of The Purpose Driven Life signed by Rick Warren, or an ex-small purple wifebeater

Wig for new moonNOT THIS ONE! If this is your New Moon Hair Dept, we are NOT happy. FYI

What is robert pattinson doing for his birthday – Well besides us, maybe about 29 shots of Jameson, smoke a whole pack and then hide in his room from you freaks. – is this some kinky mile-high club shiz?? (check it at your own risk i have NO idea what that is)

funny lesbian birthday wishes – I’m not sure but maybe we can ask KStew and NReed for some ideas? Unless they’re not talking to each other now since that whole messy faux break up we’ve created in our minds happened.

Buttcrack school – Dude, Buttcrack Santa is teaching? Where do I sign up? Prof. Santa!

Follow the cut for more hilarious, scary and just plain weird googles! Trust me it just keeps getting better!

43 Commented

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