Who are all these new people?! Volurti and Twitter don’t mix

Beller is alive!! And so are all these other Vampires I don't know...

Dear LTT-ers,

Remember when we didn’t know who the guys in the Wolfpack were or who Harry was? And we call them stuff like Nerdy Wolf and Australian dude? Well while I was away it seems like anyone who has ever been cast as a vampire came out to play in the public eye. While I was trying to catch up in the weeks of twi-news I missed, I kept saying WHO is that?! WHO is this?! That albino dude is in Breaking Dawn? So I think it’s time we catch up with the newbs (the ones I care about at least) and give them a little run down on how shiz works around these Twilight parts…

Something's not right here, right???

Vladamir, The albino guy – aka Noel Fisher
I have a lot of questions for this guy… is it bleached? Was he born this way (ain’t no other way)? I thought the Romanian Vamps were HELLA old and creep sauce looking. He may be a tad creeper but he looks 16. More just learning to drive and hide my back-ne then dark forces of the underworld.

Stefan (not Urkel) – aka Guri Weinberg
This dude went on and on about playing some big prank on the set of BD and while I enjoy a good “Go Fuck Yourself” as much as the next person, when I hear “prank” and “Breaking Dawn” in the same sentence I’m hoping some switched out Bella’s cup of fake blood for the REAL thing… or at least have Bill Condon to ask the wolfpack to not rely on CGI but to really bust naked out of their clothes and phase, with a straight face.

Srsly yall, The Pacific, Rami Malek get on this train!

Benjamin, Egyptian Vamp – aka Rami Malek
He’s pretty much the only new Vamp I really care about because he was kick ass in The Pacific, looked freaking cute with his long board in Larry Crowne but really I like him because I saw him on my way to Target a few weeks ago in his black Prius wearing one of those pork pie hats and any vamp who loves the earth and tiny hats is fine by me.

Eleazar – aka Christian Camargo
Clearly, Dexter’s brother is the only other new Vamp I really care about. Too bad his name is Eleazar and not Brian/Rudy the Ice Truck Killer… but I think I’ve waxed eloquently on this topic before.

They all seem to be starting Twitter accounts and tweeting each other and the fans like they’ve been around for decades, even telling Twihards if they’re a REAL fan they’ll follow Volturi Guard number whoever decided to join the twittersphere that week. Um no, actually I am a real fan but I only need one Tinsel Korey tweeting misspelled missives about the end of the world in my feed. One love yall! One of these is more than enough! THANKS!

Do they really think we believe them about being a true fan? Do we care? NO! Have they ever asked Stephenie Meyer to play “Fuck/Kill/Marry” with her own characters? I THINK NOT! And THAT’S how you do it Twilight Vampire newbies… a late welcome to the ‘hood from us.

Runs with Vampires… or something,
Themoonisdown

Do you feel as confused as I am about all these new people? Should I have flashed Rami Malek in his Prius? Yes? know, missed opportunity. And are you a real fan? Enough to follow all these yahoos on Twitter?

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69 Commented

People who tweet Chris Weitz: Your embarassing is showing!

Dear People Who Tweet Chris Weitz dumb crap,

NO ONE CARES. Seriously, no one care what camera angles he used or what movie best displays the use of the wide angle lens, or how foreign film distributors choose what day to release a film vs the US distributors and we especially don’t care for Chris’s take on Rob’s body parts (though they are lovely). You are ALL 2nd hand embarrassing to read and make the rest of us look like losers with hormonal issues who get off on tweeting semi naughty things to a guy who worked with a guy you like. It’s like asking your barista at Starbucks if your crush has ever creamed their coffee… hur hur hur… see what I did there? Yea, it was gross and that’s how some of you make us all look!

Srsly! How cute is this kid??

Don’t get me wrong, it’s BEYOND awesome that Chris tweets regularly and responds to his followers at all! It’s super cool and we love it and whatever but all I’m saying it stop with the facade of really caring about camera lenses, we know you just want to ask about Robsten. So check yo’self before you wreck yo’self. Annndddd if you feel the need to tweet him here’s a list of approved topics I’ve come up with:

Things we care about Chris Weitz tweeting about:

• Taylor Lautner bits

• Jokes about his mustard pants

• Cute stuff about his freaking adorable son

• Things tweeted in spanish (caliente!)

• Restaurant recommendations

• Twitpics of him at the pool

• What he’s listening to

• Stuff about his movies he’s working on

• Twitpics of the mustard pants

• Twitpics of his freaking adorable son with the mustard pants near Chris in a pool

• Secret meet up locations

• Whether Big Daddy was a diva on the New Moon set like he ALLEGEDLY is now

• The juxtaposition between his jewish last name and christian first name (srsly, I wonder these things)

• Why he’s so awesome

• Whether him, Cathi Hardi, David Slade and Bill Condon meet up regularly at Cathi’s favorite Friday’s for drinks and reminisce about the old days, share war stories and who has the best black mail tape of Robsten
  .

Every day he's tweetin'!

Tonight (last night as it were) I will be at the LA Film Fest seeing Mamitas while Chris is in a nearby theater presenting the World Premiere (oh la la!) of A Better Life… I will be enjoying Mamitas but I will be secretly longing to see your new film FIRST… and hoping that my pal who IS seeing A Better Life will get us all the TLaut and KStew gossip as they will ALLEGEDY, MAYBE be there to represent and support you. HOW great is that?! All these people love Chris! Anyway, I’m hoping Taylor brings Big Daddy and I can see the Diva from afar.

Instead of tweeting why don’t we all go see A Better Life?

Themoonisdown

Is it crazy we’re still burning a candle for this guy? NO!!! 🙂 Also who wants to see A Better Life? Anyone been hitting up the awesome LA Film Fest over the past week?? No Eclipse this year but there are tons of amazing films, if you’re in LA go go go! Vamos!

Our internet game is ridiculous: LTR, The Forum, Twitter, The Store

110 Commented

Twilosophy: Is any guy ever an “Edward?” or are they all “Jacobs?”

Dear LTT-ers and Twilosophy majors,

For the last few years since we’ve started LTT and LTR and since reading the books, podcasting with the guys and whatnot I’ve had this thought roaming around my twi-addled brain but never felt ready to tackle it… then recently both Chris Weitz and Stephenie Meyer spoke about the very thing I had been wondering… are there really any “Edwards” out there or are they all actually “Jacobs?”

Recently, a Christ Weitz follower tweeted him asking if he was Team Jacob or Team Edward and this was his response:

This guy's a "jacob?" *swoon*

I am a Jacob. So that has to be my team, by default. Except really, honestly, I’m team Bella.
@chrisweitz
.

First I loved him more because he self identifies as a “Jacob” but it got me to thinking since most guys I know have said they’re a “Jacob” and most ladies say they married a “Jacob” IS ANYONE ever an Edward? Has any guy self identified as an “Edward?” And has anyone every really gotten their “Edward?” An “Edward” being the seemingly unattainable, hot, sorta-pretty-much perfect guy who you think would never give you the time of day.

Yup, definitely a Jacob

After being in this “world” for many years I would say that a majority of married Twilight lovers would say they married their “Jacob.” Many of our fellow bloggers and even Stephenie herself has said this. She mentioned that marrying Pancho was like marrying her Jacob.  Stephenie also had this to say about Rob and Taylor in her recent interview with USA Today…

On working with Pattinson and Lautner: “Rob is more like Jacob than Edward. He’s goofy, he’s funny, he doesn’t take much seriously. But he can turn Edward on like that (she snaps her fingers) when he needs to be Edward. Taylor’s who we hang out with most. He’s a lot like fun, happy Jacob.” – Stephenie Meyer in USA Today

Wait, this guys a Jacob??

It’s ok, Rob/Edward fans, you can peel yourself off the floor now and let’s come to terms with the fact that Rob is not and never was Edward. Not that UC and I ever thought that because we’ve pretty much pegged him as a super nerd from day one yet it keeps bringing up the question: If these guys are all “Jacobs” then are all men out there really Jacobs? Or can some of them beEdwards and then become Jacobs?

Furthermore (oh big transitional words!) if most guys end up being Jacobs than what does that say about the Twilight story and Bella and Edward’s relationship? Is it really the stuff of fantasy because there are no “Edwards” in real life? And if that’s true have we finally found the reason why Twilight is so popular, because it’s a fantasy in every sense of the word?

That's a whole lotta Jacobs right there

So do I have an Edward to look forward to or should I just stop ignoring the Jacobs of my life and realize that though he may not sparkle he’s pretty darn fabulous and he might also be able to fix that weird squeaky sound my cars been making.

Here’s to the Jacobs!
Themoonisdown

Thoughts? Who’s married/dated/engaged to their Jacob? Do you think any guy is every REALLY an Edward? Are all men Jacobs at the end of the day?

Our internet game is ridiculous: LTR, The Forum, Twitter, The Store

140 Commented

News Dump: Video Explosion, a boyband & our favorite DILF is back!

Dear LTT-ers,

Since things have finally heated up on the Twilight front aka they went back to Vancouver where the own cameras there’s been a deluge of pictures and info and whatnot that we’re just trying to keep up on! Just trying to stay afloat with all of Rob’s nonsense has made this a full time job of alligator wrangling and pondering the deeper meaning of his Vanity Fair interview. Is he joking? Is he sad? What kind of dog IS Martin? There is A LOT going on in Rob world but it’s time to tackle the other folks so let’s take a look at what’s going on in Twiland (kinda like Disneyland minus the churros and general happiness).

Ain’t no lie baby…
The Wolfpack has been longing for the late 90s and the days of boybands like NSYNC, BackStreet Boys and whoever else lived in Florida at that time and met a fat man named Lou. They decided in their spare time to work on their harmonies and found out they were so amazing they formed their very own boyband called 108 Degrees!
That’s the boys on their way to record their soon-to-be hit singles “Bite Bite Bite” and “Imprinting On Your Heart.” Oh, and that’s their manager… Gil “Lou” Birmingham. Looks like Vancouver is the new Orlando.
.

Then I watched the trailer for Kellan’s new film: Love, Wedding, Marriage

Dude forget Robsten on the bearskin rug give me Kellan on Mandy Moore or give me death. DAYUM. That thing should come with a warning label. Dang. When does this come out?
.

What a sport this guy is…

Accepting his Razzie awards for both Last Airbender AND his portrayal of Jasper. But does it seem to anyone else the mini stroke has affected his mouth again with the marble mouth/southern sorta accent/side talking thing? Also I’m totally crossing my fingers for Nikki Reed to direct a 100 Monkey’s music video. Just ponder the possibilities of that for a few minutes this Friday…
.

And the last bit of news that deserves to be talked about but DEFINITELY not the least is… CHRIS WEITZ has joined twitter!

HeckYea I’m following!

I know, take a moment……………… yes, it’s true our favorite director from the Twilight saga has come back to us with a vengeance tweeting about everything, being in Argentina, his CUTE CUTE CUTE kid, answering questions and even responding to our own forum mod JodieO and and78 (those bitches!). Ok, clearly I’m jealous because he hasn’t responded to me and I even foresake ROBERT PATTINSON and his weird alligator magazine cover to tweet Chris instead. BUT WHATEVER I forgive him when he says he’s more like a Mike Welch or Gran and then tweets weird ass pictures of cats. And the mustard pants who could EVER EVER EVER forget the mustard pants? They will go down in Twiforklore and maybe have their own special wing of the Twilight Hall of Fame someday.
.

So enough of my slobbering all over Chris Weitz how about we beg the wolfpack to sing some New Kids on the block for us?

TGIF!
Themoonisdown

Be honest did you tweet naughty things to Chris Weitz (i did!!!)? Are Jackson’s multiple voice personalities started to worry you? Will you catch 108 Degrees when they tour? Does anyone other than me know who Lou Pearlman is?!

Our internet game is ridiculous: LTR, The Forum, Twitter, The Store

64 Commented

Happy extended Christmas vacay!!

Dear LTT-ers,

So we’re all still recovering from the holidays, I’m spending time with a sick family member and UC is digging her way out of a snowstorm/blizzard whatever you east coasters call them, I don’t know. So we will be in and out this week posting here and there but wanted to give you a heads up and leave some discussion tidbits from the twidom to ponder….

• The Swans celebrated Christmas according to Bill Condon… or some photoshopper on the set  worked overtime Christmas eve

• Stephenie Meyer celebrated her 21st birthday (you’re welcome) on Christmas Eve by either listening to every Muse album front to back or ordering Pancho to give her a hand massage. Or both.

• These happened… HOT DAAAAAYYYYUUUMMM!!

So when does it stop becoming an “outtake” and we all just acknowledge this dude has maybe 4 bad pictures to his name? The jerk.

Hope your Christmas was fan-damn-tabulous and you’re enjoying the down time with family and friends… we’ll be coming back atcha with some end of the year stuff this week and of course we’re on it if anything late breaking happens (Taylor grows a couple inches).

Happy Monday!
Themoonisdown

Sooooo discuss… any fantbulous Christmas stories or deals you got the day after to share?

Our internet game is ridiculous: LTR, The Forum, Twitter, The Store

50 Commented