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#RIPTwilight- Your Stories Day 2

Today we continue sharing YOUR Twilight stories. We’ve heard from many Unicorns over the years (with now real-life friend Jordan being the first, BobbyGee being our favorite Spanish-speaking soccer lover (confused visitor), a new guy named Tom who wrote for the first time last week), and our most recent active Unicorn sends his #RIPTwilight thoughts today. Plus we’re sharing one last letter to Cathy Hardi and a letter from a new Twilight fans. Why are people JUST NOW joining the fandom– we’ve been telling you about it for years guys! You missed all the fun! Hope you enjoy. Try not to try. x

Our Resident Unicorn

What the heck does a late 30’s married father of two do when he realizes that he likes Twilight waaay more than he ought to?  He can’t talk to anybody about it at work because all the Harry Potter and Star Wars nerds will make fun of him (irony?). He can’t talk about it at home because even though his wife introduced him to Twi – it’s just a book/movie series, he’s expected to get over it already (no, I won’t!!).

The late 30’s (now early 40’s) married father of two scours the internet for intelligent signs of life that enjoy Twilight, but that DO NOT TAKE IT SERIOUSLY. That was a quest of epic proportions. But it had and ending of epic satisfaction. A nirvana called “Letters to Twilight”. A magical place, filled with intelligent, witty, funny, passionate and sexy women – who love to LAUGH at Twilight as they LOVE it in massive doses.

The LTT woman. My fantasy now and forever. I’m ruined. They know who they are.


One last letter to Cathy Hardi
Pour a big glass of The Ultimate Cougarita for this one

Dear Catherine Hardwicke,

The end is here Catherine, and it’s time to take stock and consider what we’d like to ask the Twilight directors. One question stands out for you, and you know what it is: WHAT HAVE YOU DONE WITH THE AUDITION TAPE?!? Don’t look all innocent, you know the one we mean. When you lured the four ‘bachelors’ (potential Edwards) back to your pad for a make-out session. Sadly, it had to be with Beller not you. Three of them, meh, we couldn’t care less, but the fourth….

You’ve said that Twilight fans couldn’t handle the footage, but have you hidden some snippets in plain view? You’d want to keep ownership of course, have your name on it, so let’s consider one of the Twilight special features, “Catherine Hardwicke’s Bella’s Lullaby Remix“. It’s a nice little video, produced in black and white, and with some excerpts from the film. And…. something not in the film!

twilight audition tape

What’s this? Ron and Beller (yes I know I’m mixing my metaphors!) making out on a bed, but in unfamiliar clothing, a grey(?) T-shirt  for him, light camisole and shorts with black bra for her. Rehearsing? Orrr THE EPIC AUDITION?

What other evidence do we have?

Well, we know from the Twilight Commentree that Ron has a grey t-shirt, he mentioned that he was wearing it for the Biology Lab scene. And we know you’re a kooky creature, I bet you have black sheets on the bed, non? And we know the audition was filmed with a hand-held camera…. so come on Catherine, give it up! Is this from the EPIC AUDITION or not?

Enviously yours for being so close to Ron,

Wish she had more time

Dear LTT,
I really don’t want to talk about the end, it just makes me too sad. But inevitably we are there. For many of you, Twilight has been a big part of your lives for several years now, and well, that makes me kinda jealous.

I’m jealous because you’ve had years worth of book releases, book signings, movie premieres, movie marathons, DVD release parties, Comic Cons, Twi Cons, and all the joy that comes with those things. You’ve been on a Twi-high for a long time…much longer than I have.

“I’m not into vampires.”
“I don’t really read…ever.”
“Twilight, psh! That’s kid stuff.”

That was me just a year ago. (So hard to admit that!) Then my husband bought me a Kindle, which I then proceeded to say: “But I like the feel of a real book in my hands!” *Reminder, I “didn’t read…ever.” Oh, how things have changed.

Because of a suggestion from a friend, the first book I [reluctantly] bought on my Kindle was, you guessed it, Twilight. AND THEN I COULDN’T STOP. I read and I read and I read. Then I watched all of the movies up to BD1, which was still in the theaters, and then I re-read.

So, for me, it truly feels like it just began…and it’s already over. I got one fun midnight DVD release, one movie premiere, one theater movie marathon, and one Twi-Con. I wan’t more and I just can’t have it.

As sad as I am (and that’s, like, reaaallly sad) I am super thankful for one thing (besides my husband buying me a Kindle): Thanks to Stephenie Meyer for writing Twilight. It truly changed my life. I never much saw the value in reading, or maybe I was just caught up in whatever it was I was too busy doing when I was younger, but it started a trend in my life that I couldn’t be happier about – unless I got to read some Midnight Sun, eh?

I’ve read more books in the past year than I have in the combined 26 years before that – and it all started with Twilight. I’ve read books that I never would have picked up a year ago, and it makes me sad just thinking about what I would have been missing.

So, however late I may have been in hopping on this bandwagon, I’m SO glad I finally did. Not just because I now have hot Robward wallpapers for my iPhone or Pinterest boards full of things I never would have cared about if it wasn’t for Twilight. It’s because I now do something the 15 year old me would have thought crazy: read for fun.

Thanks Steph Meyer. Thanks Twilight. Thanks LTT.

Sara P.

  • MariaCecilia

    Oh, Sara, I know how you feel – I climbed on summer of 2009, and missed out on a lot of epic goings-on before then! But let’s not cry over unread blogs, let’s relish how much fun we’ve been privileged to have already! And let’s keep stalking That’s Normal, monomanically raving on about audition tapes, dumpsters, bear skin rugs and all things Twi-related in the comments.It isn’t over ’til the fat lady sings…er, until the vampire stops sparkling. Or whatever.
    KStewBoy – I’m gonna follow you, too, until I actually find you. Mrs KStewBoy, consider yourself warned about the crazy LTT ladies. 😉

    • KStewBoy

      I am fully prepared. I think 😉

      • TeamEdward_Bella4ever

        I’ve met a couple of Twi-guys out there, so you are not alone out there. Over at breakingdawnmovie.org the website owner it a twi-guy to, he’s great!

      • Bubs

        Hi KStewBoy.
        I’ve always wondered…was it Twilight that you liked “waaay” more or KStew herself ???? Either way, you have excellent taste !

        • KStewBoy

          Kristen pulled me into Twilight – and the love affair with both have intermingled ever since 🙂

  • Luludee

    KStewboy, I love you more after that letter. And Sara, you must read through the archives! There is comedy GOLD in there!

    • KStewBoy


    • When I began my search for all things Twilight – I came across this site and spent hours and hours here reading the archives – laughing hysterically and annoying my husband by reading him every funny thing I came across (which was everything). I think I may have to revisit them, though!

  • TheColdWoman

    Sara P., I’m so happy Twilight has given you the gift of reading – by which I mean that it’s shown you how much fun reading is! Oh the power of Stephenie Meyer! And now I have the Reading Rainbow song in my head… 🙂

    • I find it strange that I never read much when I was younger, because I’ve always loved to write! Better late than never, right?

  • GoWithIt

    love the Twilight Sparkle image! LTT-keep the magic going. I browsed That’s Normal for the first time last night.
    I was asked why I liked Twilight so much by a friend the other night. Somehow after all this time I still find the most appropriate feeling answer is “sometimes it chooses you”
    It is funny to think that there will always be people discovering it for the first time. Just Google “Twilight what the fuck is wrong with me”, and you’ll find us.

    • TeamEdward_Bella4ever

      Your right, it does chose you. Not everyone who reads it, gets and becomes a Twi-hard. I was lucky, I found Twilight before the movie came out and found some wonderful ladies through a web site re-reading the books and we even got to meet, some for first time and for others a second time. We all flew from different areas across the US and went to the last Twilight Breaking Dawn 4 fan camp and premiere. It was like a dream being there with my friends and a few thousand Twi-hard that love it the same way you do. Seeing the cast and watching the movie with everyone was and awesome and unforgettable experience.

  • KStewBoy – your wife is a lucky lady! I’ve gotten my husband to admit he enjoys them, but if he were a fanboy I’d be in heaven.

  • Bubs

    Snuggler-lots of good questions for Cathy Hardi. Why don’t we recommend to her to do a pay-per-view [a la ipad/app/download, whatever] for Twi. fans. After all, HER “kiss” was shown on the Academy Awards and that is “one exceptional honour” for any Director. Plus with BILLIONS of Twi fans around the world @ $1 per view, she’s be set for life !!!

  • Bubs

    Sara P. Welcome to the family. I was rather late too [Eclipse was just made]. It sounds like you at least live in the States [no Comic Con etc. in Australia].
    Thank GOD for the internet and LTT. I intend to grab a wine or two or three etc. and go back to the LTT start and just enjoy at my leisure…

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