Twilight Buzz

Continuing with Moon’s idea of “mini” letters on Monday, today we’re going to discuss the latest Twilight “buzz” with a few little letters of my own:

Dear Cathy Hardi,

Wait, something about your new movie sounds familiar

What could it be? There’s:

Catherine Hardwicke
Billy Burke
A Wolf
Girl torn between two men
Familiar looking woods
Familiar looking mountains
An Actress from a Summit film

Is “All of the above” an answer? Man- you really like what you like & stick with it, huh?

And did you seriously use your interview about a totally unrelated movie to say

“Shiloh was my runner-up for Edward in “Twilight” but he and Kristen [Stewart] didn’t have the instant chemistry lock that is now well-known.”

Ohhh Cathy- give it a rest! We know- YOU are the reason for the magicness. It was probably in front of YOUR fireplace that they first made love on the bear skin. It was on YOUR video camera that their connection was first noticed and you watch it every night before you go to bed because it’s “Groovy.” We know. And until you release that video with the proof of the “magicness” no one cares…

In other news, I’ll probably see this movie. If not in the theaters, definitely when it’s on that free movie channel On Demand.

Dear Charlie,

It has come to our attention that tomorrow is “Have sex with a guy with a mustache” day. It’s for Cancer. It would be horrible if it didn’t happen. And you see…… you’re the only one I know with a mustache right now. So I’m just putting it out there- I’m willing. For cancer, and all. And since tomorrow is the official “Have sex with a guy with a mustache day,” I can bet there are tons of others who feel the same way.

Born-again virgin no more! Get out that little comb & make it happen. There are plenty of gals who wouldn’t mind a mustache ride. For cancer, of course.

More, after the jump!

Dear Kellan Lutz,

I’ve been racking my brain since yesterday trying to figure out why in the world you

  1. Shacked up with Anna-Lynn McCord again
  2. Felt you had to hide it (She IS your ex-girlfriend after all. Break-up sex is allowed)
  3. and you chose to hide in a Carlton Motor Lodge in Studio City, CA!

At first I thought- well, maybe you’re broke. Perhaps your Twilight gig doesn’t pay so well & you have expensive taste in work-out pants & v-neck t-shirtt, so maybe the $75/night charge is all you can manage. Or maybe it’s that they offer a $50 upgrade for a room with a private jacuzzi. You don’t get that at the Best Western these days. Was the tub in the shape of a champagne glass like in the Poconos?

I’ll never understand why you went for the cheap, but speaking of cheap- Why Anna-Lynn? Didn’t you get your church on & repent from your dirty ways recently? I thought things were over between you two? Were you getting together to try to convert her? Did she want inside scoop on the Breaking Dawn script & you couldn’t risk telling her at your home in case Summit bugged it, fearing you’d let the secrets slip?

Ooorrrr maybe I’m thinking about this the wrong way. I’ve been assuming all along that Anna-Lynne went into a fugly wig store to disguise herself, but maybe it was someone else disguised as Anna-Lynn??

Hmmmm, who could it be?

We can definitely assume it’s not Jumping Rob, despite his being EVERYWHERE lately- plus he was seeing fleeing from the scene. He’s seen the pictures of Anna-Lynne eating a banana & he’s scared.

Could our dreams be coming true & it’s our very own Ashley Greene? Is there a Kelshley in the works? You snooze you lose, Jackson!

What if it’s Taylor Swift- you heard her latest album- girl gets around. Plus she needs to be broken up with for “religious reasons” so she can write her next hit ballad and find success at Country, Pop and Christian radio. It would explain the sneaking around- they don’t want Tay Lautner to find out.

Or noooooo what if it’s Miss Stephenie Meyer? She hasn’t been seen since they returned from Brasil, has she? Of course, nothing shady was going on- they were just having a Bible Study.

So, what’s the deal, Kellan? Why the motor lodge? Do they have the best snacks in the vending machine? And was that really Anna-Lynne? If so, have you been repenting a ton this week?

So much Twilight buzz…. (so very little of it actually about Twilight.. shhhh)

Did you miss yesterdays promo-post about our favorite “Bite Me Edward” notepads that are 50% off now through November 30th? Check out the banner in the sidebar, or hop on over to yesterday’s letter for the details!

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