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Our Runner Up Virgin!!! Is in love with a movie character

Dear LTT-ers and Twilight sluts (one and the same?),

Remember our fun Virgin contest where we asked you all to send us your hilarious and embarrassing stories about your first time with Twilight? Well we loved so many that after we named Heidi the winner we knew  had to have a runner up because we loved Carrie’s email to her friend so much. We’ll let her take it away…

Oh heyyyyyy LTT-

So I found the below email that I sent to my bestie, a few nights after I saw Twilight for the first time. I re-read it and it made me lol. Also made me kinda melancholy, reminiscing about my times as a a Twirgin. Oh, so young and innocent…
FYI, I’m still only a heartbeat away from getting Edward Cullen’s name tattooed on my ass…

xox – Carrie


From: carrie
To: friend
Subject: RE:
Date: Fri, 23 Jan 2009 13:12:03 +1030

Yeah still want to head to beach. Is going to be good beach weather Sunday. No other real plans yet, except for laundry, and reading my new book which I am officially OBSESSED with, and thinking about the movie and generally living in my new fantasy world, which I prefer so much better to reality…

You know how i told you I wanted to go see Twilight (the movie) cos I’d had this insane really intense dream about it and I couldn’t stop thinking about the dream?

Well the other night I was bored so I was going through Brent’s dvds and found a dodgy copy of Twilight that he brought back from Fiji with him.

So I watched it.

And I loved it. No, actually love isn’t the right word. I adored it. It was the single most amazing thing I have ever seen – and so much like the dream I had bout it – except better. After I finished watching it I was on this adrenaline high. It was bizarre. I couldn’t sleep or do anything but think about this movie.

Then all yesterday all I could do was look on the internet to find out everything about the movie and the book.
But it wasn’t enough, so last night I went to Village to see the movie ont he big screen and it was just awe inspiring. Incredible. So as soon as the movie finished I went to Borders and bought the book… and the soundtrack… and was up until 4 this morning reading the book.

What's better than this guy??!!

I am officially obsessed with a fictional character from a movie. But it’s not just me – there is this whole cult out there of people – guys and girls – who are obsessed to the point of psychosis with the books and the movie.

I’m a little concerned as it’s pretty much taken over my life.

But the good thing is that it has pretty much turned me off all men (particularly certain fat ones who work at Collins Simms) for the rest of my life. Because no one could ever be as amazing as Edward Cullen. *sigh*. I love him. I am in love with a movie character. I am a heartbeat away from getting his name tattooed on my arse.

Feel free to commit me to the mental ward now, cos I think I’m only going to get more obsessed from here…

THANKS Carrie! After reading the entire last few paragraphs and laughing so hard remembering thinking the same things. What man will ever measure up to Edward? There are really more people obsessed with this out there like I am? Yea, this isn’t going to end well. We’ve all been there and still are

Our internet game is ridiculous: LTR, The Forum, Twitter, The Store


  • Anonymous

    OMG I am so in love with this letter! I love the whole, “Oh sh*t I am going insane right now. I am fully aware of the insane obsession that is overtaking my life Right Now As We Speak and you know what? Screw it. Ima let it happen.”

    Let’s just say I relate. Let’s go get ink together.

    • JustGoWithIt


  • Cat P.

    haha! love it… I’m starting to finally remember that period after I read it for the first time… I think I must have stuffed it in the back of my mind…. for good reasons

    • MariaCecilia

      I remember it vividly. I saw the movie on DVD, then spent two summer weeks lying alone in a meadow just like Bella and Edward’s reading the books. And then I discovered the Internet Twi world. And then I found LTT. And my life has not been the same…

  • Anonymous

    This is beautiful stuff. I really want to see what the friend replied!

    • JustGoWithIt

      Yes, I wonder if her friend called her a loony or ran out and bought the books and DVD.

  • JustGoWithIt

    Speaking of going insane…I gave a friend of a friend a ride home last night and had a Twilight conversation the whole car ride. This is a man by the way. My first conversation about Twilight with a man, that actually read all the books, and has seen all the movies so far. I was nagging my friend as we were leaving to finally read her copy of Twilight, and so he mentioned that he’d read them all, and that he enjoys YA fantasy fiction in general. He works in special effects (or something like that), and he says that a guy he works with “likes it too much”, and he is the only one that will go see the movies with him. He was not an obsesser himself (quote “I don’t get why all those ladies scream and go crazy for Patterson or whatever his name is), but as close as I’ve ever seen in the male of the species. He has done manips to make friends look like Jacob, he was willing to have an entire conversation about it for the sake of a ride home.
    And tell me this has happened to any of you: I had this total adrenaline rush. You know how it is hard to hide your giddiness when the subject of Twilight or Rob Pat comes up? Well it was also chilly, and my teeth were chattering, I was probably yelling. I’m 100% sure I sounded nuts bonkers, and he probably wondered how I got through the party without acting a fool and asking people to call me Bella.

    • Anonymous

      I just spit food out of my mouth: “I was probably yelling”.

      So, are you marrying him or what?

      • JustGoWithIt

        Well no, I’m already married. But I think maybe our friend in common should. They almost had a romance, it was kind of a Ross and Rachel kind of situation. She was in another country and found out he had a big crush on her, and thought she might too, but for some reason when she got back here it fizzled. I don’t know why.

        • Anonymous

          Sorry, can’t reply. Thinking about RPattz covered in half eaten mints and elephant spit: http://www.usmagazine.com/moviestvmusic/news/rob-pattinson-covered-his-body-with-wet-mints-for-on-set-romance-201144

          • JustGoWithIt

            He sucked on mints and then stuck them in his armpits. Giggle.

          • Anonymous

            does he say stuff like that to entertain himself, to make people not be in love with him so much (NOT WORKING), or does he actually stick mints in his armpits because he is crazy that way?

            In any case I kind of think it’s adorable and very very entertaining. The only weird thing he has said that bummed me out was the Details mag thing where he was all, “I hate vaginas”, because, um, what? And the interviewer was all “*giggle hair flip* hee hee me too you are so handsome”. I feel like that required a follow up question.

            wait. how did I get from Armpit Mints to vaginas? (**again**)

          • JustGoWithIt

            I read the breakdown of that on Lainey Gossip, and that helped. She thought it was a reference to a joke about a man being allergic to vaginas, and swelling up whenever he is near them…
            Which is the only way that statement makes any sense. Sounds like something Rob would say without clearing up.
            Or maybe he is actually allergic to vaginas. I’ve never heard of that, but doesn’t sound like something men would want to discuss. I did know a woman that was allergic to sperm, or sensitive to it anyway, it caused her a lot of surface irritation.

          • JustGoWithIt

            I can also see why it has never really been brought up again. Can you imagine doing an interview with him, and the question on the top of your list is “So, Rob, tell us your true feelings about vaginas. Are you really allergic?”

          • Anonymous

            Are you serious? It’s the first thing I would ask! “TALK TO ME ABOUT VAGINAS! …here, have some more alcohol…okay, anyway, GIRL PARTS, yay or nay? Would you like a visual to clarify?!” (as you can see, I am assuming any interaction I would have with Mr. Pattinson would end up in a restraining order. Sort of inevitable, really, so may as well go all out.)

          • JustGoWithIt

            I must have momentarily forgotten who I was speaking to, MarbleNutSlut. You are right. I really can’t think of any better questions. “So Robert (I wouldn’t call him Rob in an interview unless he asked me to) you have said that you like hot girls, but you’ve also mentioned that you don’t like vaginas. So would a hot ladyboy be your ideal sexy time partner? Or do you just prefer to have the lights off when you sink the pink?”

          • Anonymous

            I don’t see why we can’t submit these comments to MTV, or Summit directly, and become the Official Robert Pattinson Interviewers for Life. I wouldn’t call him “Rob”, either. How rude. We hardly know each other.

          • “Like Mint Chocolates Tucked Away In Robert Pattinson’s Body Crevices for Elephants.” Not quite as catchy a title, but it would still bring viewers in. Junior Mints would SELL OUT at the theatre, especially if they came in a box shaped like Rpattz.

            He also showered in apple juice to attract giraffes. He is COMMITTED to the ROLE, I tell you. Taylor would not have done that. Hey Rob – wanna attract humans? No need to cover yourself in food or beverage…unless you want to. And if you want to, I recommend placing crisp sweet potato medallions with goat cheese-cranberry-celery-walnut relish on your stomach and maybe spritzing your ears with Vin Gris. I usually don’t eat dessert, but should you decide to place passion fruit flan in your neck folds, I’m game.

          • Anonymous

            I would see that movie.

          • Ish

            I want to be a mint. Hell I’d even take the armpit

          • beakerj

            Oh come now, Taylor WOULD have done that. Taylor would have BECOME the apple.

          • Oh, I was just kidding. 🙂 Last week on LTT, Rob’s commitment to the role was stated to be less intense than Taylor’s. Rob wore sparkles, bad contacts, and changed his hair color. And furthermore, Rob wore horrible sweaters for Bad Mother’s Handbook and sported a ridiculous fake-looking mustache for Little Ashes. He’s HARD CORE committed to his roles. That being said, I can see Jacob as an apple. A talking shiny red Twilight apple. “Hey Bella – over here, yes, that’s right, I’m a talking apple and I luuuuuurve you. I’m a were-apple. You were probably wondering why I have acted so tart some days and so sweet on others…and why I often try to dive into pie pans…well…now you know.”

          • TeamSeth

            You’re SO right. When you look up role commitment in the dictionary it says “Sean Penn; Taylor Lautner (aka “I’m Sean Penn, bitches!”)

            this crap Nat’s spouting about Rob growing out his nails long and dying his hair–because it’s soooo hard to let things that grow out naturally grow out and so hard to have someone dye your hair for you. Commitment my butt. Get to a gym, Adonis. You might be genius, but you’re no Edward.


            And yes, i think Jacob would be a good apple.

          • TeamSeth

            Um…that is commitment. I mean, apple juice or not, he actually TOOK a shower! YAY!

            Too bad he doesn’t care about Twilight.

          • TeamSeth

            (ps-hehe, I was joking)

        • You should invite both friends over, make a huge bowl of popcorn, and have them watch the illicit leaked Breaking Dawn stills on your computer. Be sure to leave the room a lot and leave a bearskin carpet on the floor for them.

    • Hmm…”a guy he works with ‘”likes it too much'”. That sounds perverted. I mean, what does he do that makes it “too much” as opposed to a normal LTT-level of obsession? Does he take his Twilight DVDs out for chaperoned strolls? And if so, does he put them in one of those strollers for triplets, and cover them all up with purple blankets? Or maybe he walks around with his Edward doll in a Baby Bjorn, just so doll Edward can hear his heartbeat and call him a silly human? What is too much? Getting a hotel room with the Twilight series and taping them to the headboard? Hmmm. Too much. You should try to get details, and of course share them here.

      • MariaCecilia

        Maybe we don’t want to know? (Your imagination already has me reeling over the kinky possibilities..) Or,more likely, he just has a low tolerance level because he’s a guy, and thinks that watching the movies more than twice is “too much”. (Is twenty-two too much is what I’d like to know?)

        • JustGoWithIt

          I should have asked him to recall the exact nature of their male on male Twilight fan teasing. But you know how it is, you can’t give yourself away too much. Try to play it cool. I’m not willing to let my freak flag fly unless the person I’m talking too is going to pull theirs out too. If I was really going to go there I would have asked for some help with manips involving Edward and me, but that would be inappropriate and I wouldn’t want to be accused of that…..again.

          • TeamSeth

            Maybe that’s what happened… His work friend was like “I’ll show you mine if you show me yours.” and your friend was like “Yeah, I’m not I want to do that just yet.” and he looked over to see his work friend already had his out. Yikes! (freak flags, of course)

      • TeamSeth

        Does he take his Twilight DVDs out for chaperoned strolls?

        I pee my pants! Soooo funny. hehehehe

        ps-like the avi; we’re rocking it!

        • Uh, TS, what is your avi? I can’t make it bigger. In small format, it looks like a springer spaniel next to Anime Edward? Or maybe the springer spaniel is bella? In any event, I googled around to see if I could find a similar image to match, so I could confirm, but all I found was this. Anime Spidermonkey. http://i51.tinypic.com/fxfoz7.jpg

          • TeamSeth

            Yeah, that’s about right.

            Springer Spaniel!!!!!!!!!!! You make me pee in my pants twice today!

    • MariaCecilia

      Oh, I can relate, I have had those symptoms too: chattering teeth, adrenaline high, needing to go to the bathroom real bad, and a hammering heart. It’s either love, or it’s Twilight. Possibly both. (Or a math quiz. If combined with nausea.)

      • JustGoWithIt

        Good, I’m not the only normal LTT reading person who can’t keep strict control of her bodily functions when discussing Twilight.

    • TeamSeth

      Oh, I get the rush. It’s like… I dunno. You just tiptoe around it so much at first, kind of feeling it out, maybe making a joke about Twilight’s ‘quality’… all the while thinking about LTT and maybe this person is MarbleNutSlut or Nat or even someone who never comments and you both need to decide if the other is ‘down with the kids’ or not. And then they are!!!!!!!! And you’re like “OMG OMG OMG I LOOOOOVE TWILIGHT. ER, um, yeah. Do you look at any websites or blogs? Yeah? There’s this one I like a lot, called LTT, um Letters to Twilight. Have you heard–no? Oh, you should totally check it out!” And then you remember how you write lewd things about sparklepeen and threesomes with Charlie and Charlie and get really tweed serious about whether or not Jacob was emotionally abusive to Bella in Eclipse or if Edward should’ve forgiven Bella for cheating on him with a dog. And you kind of wish you’d thought about that BEFORE mentioning your screen name on LTT… Sigh.

      • Anonymous

        You guys. I cannot *wait* for the day someone screams at me, “OMG YOU’RE MARBLENUTSLUT!” I hope my mother is there or something. Actually, I hope it’s Stephenie Meyer. That would be epic.

        • Anonymous

          ALSO! My Twi-cherry-popper just told me today that if I drive 4 hours out of my way this summer when I go to my cousin’s wedding, “that may cross a line.” OH YEAH? Maybe you saying that crossed a line! Don’t act like you don’t have a special pocket Edward, bitch.

      • natteringyeahrobber

        What would life be if there was Twilight but no internet? Has that already been discussed? We’d all be forced to try to stick Twilight feelers out into the general public. Or maybe write those Missed Connections ads (does anyone else remember those? I’m old!!!).

        Saw you purchasing Twilight DVDs, strawberry shampoo and a frozen mushroom ravioli dinner at Target. Does that mean what I think it means? You looked at my Team MarbleNuts shirt and giggled. But when I tried to approach you, you abandoned your shopping cart and made for the exit. Please respond.


        You were on the bus, reading Love in the Time of Cholera. Only when I looked closer, it was the book cover for Love in the Time of Cholera placed over Breaking Dawn. You looked horrified and giddy at the same time. I was wearing a “Team CharlieX2” shirt. You laughed when our eyes met, but it was your stop. I can answer all your BD questions, as I’m sure you have many. Same bus, same time tomorrow?

  • JustGoWithIt

    Carrie. Do it. And then kindly show us you bum.

    • MariaCecilia

      This reminds me of a Monthy Python sketch. The man with two buttocks. Isn’t it a beautiful thing to be able to CLAIM that you have an EC tattoo on your bum, knowing that the world will never get the opportunity to prove you wrong? A “virtual” tattoo, so to speak.. (“Our viewers need proof!”)

      • MariaCecilia

        Three buttocks. Of course. 🙂

  • MariaCecilia

    This made me reminisce about the way it all started…sadly I have nothing written down because it’s always been going on solely in my head: I have no fellow Twifans in my life (present company excepted of course!). Which is quite appropriate: the most absorbing interests and friendships in my life are obviously all going on IN MY HEAD, so you do the math – am I mental or what? If one day I do decide to get a Cullen-tattoo on some (invisible) body part, there will be no one there to talk me out of it except you LTT ladies. Feel the responsibility?

    Did we do that in a post BTW? Decide what tattoo to get and where? Wait, don’t remind me, I don’t want to trigger the impulse by Saying It Out Loud.

    • TeamSeth

      I think you should get one near your vagina that says “Shields are down.” Then it may or may not be Twilight and Bella, and may or may not be some other science fiction/Star Trek moment. Either way, if the pants are off, shields are down, right?

      (I felt it was okay to say “vagina” because it was mentioned earlier in the comments.)

  • Anonymous

    I lost my Twilight virginity and dragged my best friend along with me, to lose hers st the same time, she was just one book behind me the whole time. One email? We probably had hundreds. If not more. We’d discuss, share photos, discuss some more. No lie. Let’s just say not a while lot of work was done by either if us while we lost our Twilight virginity or for some time after. Hmm, it was nothing sorry of fabulous having someone gushing with me.

    Then I loaned the books to one of my other best friends. She was Team Jacob from day one. Since I’ve been a Team Edward girl since page one, we had daily animated debates on the pros and cons of Edward versus Jacob. We made sound arguments and conceded when the other made a valid point. It wasn’t hostile, they were amazing debates. It was awesome. I miss those debates.

    Ugh. I need to suck someone else into Twilight…

    • Stacey

      Me too, my friend, me too. I think I will work on my sister…she knows she likes it. Just won’t admit. I think she’d turned off by Bella’s wardrobe of hoodies and flannels. I know I am… (oops, my inner Alice is coming out again)

      • Anonymous

        Hahaha! The clothes didn’t bother me, but I never had an Alice in my life to guide me strictly. 🙂

        The problem with me with needing to find someone to suck into Twilight is as soon as I lost my Twilight virginity, I turned into a Twilight whore. I pushed that book. I took a lot if twilight virginities… Now I seem to have no more virgins to introduce into this twilight world. Except my dental hygienist, but she keeps meaning to read them for the past 2 years, so I’m kind of giving up in that one.

        • JustGoWithIt

          More like a Twilight pimp 🙂

        • TeamSeth

          I think you need to visit the store (you know the one) and up your “goodies” collection– you know, bring the intensity back into those who are already broken in. No one does reverse cowboy their first time, but by their twenty-second, things need to be “shaken up” so to speak.

          So, you know, like pocket eddies, reanimated discussion, and wait, i thought you didn’t have any Twi people in your town? Didn’t you lament this before?

          • TeamSeth

            (wow, I just made so many LTT comment section back references)

          • Anonymous

            I did and I do. My friend I debated with mostly let Twi go after that. All others I’ve pushed Twi on liked it well enough, they just didn’t get super excited about it (except my mom who couldn’t get past the weirdness of it being about vampires). I kept being disappointed taking Twi virginity after Twi virginity, waiting for another like my best friend and mine, but mediocre enthusiasm was all I was met with. Ask liking the books a lot but that was about it. Apparently I ned to improve my pimp skills. 😉

            Only my best friend knows I frequent here as she lurks.

          • Anonymous

            I do not understand the mediocre fans. It is a constant mystery to me. I get not liking it at all (blah blah I am too feminist/literary/full of shit to like this) but to be all, MEH? Craziness.

          • Bubs

            NutSlut. As usual, you summed it up eloquently.

  • Anonymous

    I was at a summer camp, having picked up Twilight a few weeks previously because I’d heard it was good. I started Twi on a Sunday, finished on Monday, picked my sister up from camp and told her we needed to make a slight detour on the way home. I bought NM and EC (BD wasn’t out yet), started NM that night and finished it the next day. Same deal with EC. The other counselors can watch the kids during swim time, right?

  • Notanadikt Bella

    I went to see Red Riding Hood the other day and kept picturing Shiloh Fernandez as Edward. It was hard getting Rob’s image out of my head, but after a while, I could see why he got an audition. Still glad Rob made it, though. The magicness wouldn’t have been the same.

  • CarrieCee

    Lolz – I only just read this. Yay me! *Big smile*. I actually have the reply email from my bestie saved, it was all in a long email chain where she pretty much just calls me out on being nuts and telling me I can’t hang around with her anymore til I’m sane again. She’s still my bestie – not cos I stopped obsessing about Twilight and Edward, but cos I got her hooked too. Sadly, no tattoo yet. But when I get one you know this will be the first place I tell everyone about it!

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