Taylor Lautner at a hockey game in 4 takes…
Dear Taylor-
I had a great weekend, saw some friends, went to some house parties, got a fathers day gift (don’t forget Big Daddy Lautner this Sunday!) and wondered what you were up to now that New Moon wrapped principle photography… and lucky me Just Jared found you at a Detroit Red Wings hockey game! I totally forgot you were from the North because who else watches hockey around here? You and Big Daddy Lautner (my other name for Poppa Filet o Fish) did not disappoint with your AMAZING facial expressions during that game that were all caught on film for folks like UC and I to enjoy… and enjoy them we did!
Taylor: OH DUDE DAD!! That cougar behind me just grabbed my balls in the hall and I liked it!!
Big Daddy: Isn’t that a Katy Perry song?
Taylor: Um Yea, something like that, I don’t know Dad but she pushed me into the guys bathroom and told me she’d “make me a man” for Rob’s phone number, can you believe it?! I was like get in line sister!
Big Daddy: Hmmmph… kids these days… freakin 6 pack abs and mystic tans are wasted on the youth… I wonder if they have a McDee’s in this arena. Taylor go get me a McFlurry!
Taylor: Daaaadd… I just remembered Selena broke up with me. I’m really sad… do you have a kleenex?
Big Daddy: Uh, I got this leftover napkin from Wendy’s, will that do?
Taylor: sniff… sniff… yeaaaa but who will I walk in the rain with now? What about the umbrella I bought? Who will I give chaste sweet hugs to on the sidewalk in front of the papparazzi?
Big Daddy: Consider it a blessing she dumped you now Son. She’s a Disney girl, it would have taken 2 years to get to first base and then it would have ended in sorrow after the inevitable dirty webcam pics surfaced. Do you want some cotton candy?
Follow the cut to see if Big Daddy tackles a Dippin Dots vender…
Cougar in the back: What’s Kristen Stewart doing here?! Wait… is Rob here?
Blond girl in the front: OHMYGAWD! She has a mullet?! HAHAHAHAA!! WTF?!
Nascar Guy next to Taylor: Sing it with me: I LOVE ROCK N ROLL so put another dime in the juke box babaaaaay! YEA!
Taylor: OOOOhhh SSSSNNNAAAaaaappppp she wasn’t lying when she said Joan Jett… that’s a lot of party in the back! DAAAAAmmmnnn
Big Daddy: Wanna make this interesting, Tay? If the Redwings win I’ll treat us to filet o fishes… if they lose you treat me to retirement and Big Macs for life… whatddya say?
Taylor: HUH?
Taylor: OH baby look at those boobs on that cheerleader*!!! Dad, you’re totally missing it! What are you doing on your phone?!
Big Daddy: I just downloaded the Pizza Hut app. to my phone… I’m ordering a pizza for halftime… Hmmmm I wonder if they still have those pasta bread bowls…
Aaaannnddd scene.
Oh Taylor we love your dad! Seriously, how could we not feature these on LTT? It was either this or an in depth look at the Kristen Stewart knotted tshirt phenomenon. The mere thought of it makes my brain hurt and Big Daddy can not just be ignored.
Hope your weekend was faboo and hopefully your team won!
XO and Big Daddy Hugs,
Themoonisdown
PS Big thanks to UC for helping me get rolling on this one and don’t miss out on our newest series over at LTR called “Roblosophy” yep UC flips the script on Twilosophy and gets philosophical with some Rob goodness.
Wanna meet up with other LTT/LTR readers? Wanna read the latest in the Robsten/Non Robsten brohaha? You don’t know what Twilight Theater is? You wanna see the hottest videos? Well all that happens over at THE FORUM!
More at Just Jared Jr.
*obviously i know nothing about hockey! i asked UC if they had cheerleaders… they do not, oh well!*
Tags: , abs, Big Daddy, Big Mac, bread bowls, cougar, dad, Detroit, Detroit Red Wings, father, filet o fish, funny, greasy, hilarious, Hockey, jacob black, katy perry, Kristen Stewart, McDonalds, McFlurry, mullet, paparazzi, Pizza Hut, Rob Pattinson, Runaways, Sad, Selena Gomez, Taylor Lautner, taylor lautner's dad, weekend, Wendys